A New Normal
by kdc2239
Summary: Bella's perfect world is crumbling around her. She feels as though she's drowning when she meets an angry, broken Edward. Can he save her while living in an abusive nightmare of his own? Can they save each other?
1. Chapter 1 Revelry

_**So the time we spent it was precious to me**_

_**All the while I was dreaming of revelry**_

_**And I told myself for the way you go, rained so hard it felt like snow**_

_**Everything came a tumbling down on me**_

_**In the back of the woods in the dark of the night**_

_**Palest of the old moonlight**_

_**It all feels so incomplete**_

_**Dreaming of Revelry**_

_**–Kings of Leon**_

**BPOV**

Growing up is hard. It's hard for everyone, however, some are luckier than others. I thought growing up I was one of the lucky ones, but as I sat in there, I realized how wrong I was.

I sat in a blank hospital room; my nose was burning with the smell of the chemicals they used for sterilization. On the walls were generic pictures, all in natural colors. There was nothing remarkable in the room, only the standard bed, sink and television. I took a minute to look out the window; the view was bland, just a concrete parking structure. There was nothing good about the day. It was a gloomy overcast, rainy day, with clouds so dark they were almost black. All I could hear was the pounding rain outside that was beating against the window, and the gentle hum of hospital machines. Everything else was still and quiet. It made me uncomfortable.

When I had walked into the room earlier, I was sure the shock on my face was evident. Sitting in the middle of the room, in a starched white bed, was my father, Charlie Swan. To my surprise, he had been wearing a traditional hospital gown, a stark contrast to the police uniform that I was so used to. His wrist was attached to an IV that was forcibly pumping fluids into his body. My mom, Renee, had come up behind me and put her hands on my shoulders.

"Honey, we need to talk, can you sit down over there?" she asked in a hushed voice as she pointed to a plastic chair by the bed.

She looked tired and worn out, much different then her normal refreshed look and childlike enthusiasm. I could tell by the blotches on her skin and the bloodshot look of her eyes that she had been crying.

"Wh-What's going on?" I stammered.

Out of nervousness, I had started to bite the inside of my cheek and pull at the strings on my purple sweater. I had no idea at the time I asked the question, that I would be getting the worst news of my young life.

"Bella, Bella, are you listening?" Mom asked.

"Sorry. What?" I was too distracted from the shock to listen attentively at that point.

"Mom said, that the doctors don't see any reason why a full recovery isn't completely possible," Dad said with a weak smile.

"That's really great, Dad," I had replied with tears in my eyes.

They had just finished explaining the details, that at the time, I didn't know would change my life forever.

They informed me that during all of this time, while we thought that dad had a flu that wouldn't budge, it was something far worse. After hours of testing, they had learned he had cancer. He was diagnosed with Acute Myelogenous Leukemia (AML). Mom and Dad explained that this form of cancer was a fast moving cancer of the blood that stems from his bone marrow. They continued to declare how the doctors were encouraged by how early they caught it and with fast, aggressive treatment; "He would kick this in no time."

I sat there nodding my head, trying to keep up with all the information that was being thrown my way, while trying to stay strong and not cry at the same time. I knew once I was alone, I would be able to process the information better. As Mom and Dad finished up their explanation, a doctor strolled into the room. He was a very average looking man, about six feet tall, early forties, with pale skin. He wore glasses that didn't seem to quite fit his face, giving him in awkward look. Despite the awkwardness he handled himself with an air of confidence that made everyone relax just a little.

"How is everyone doing?" he asked in a soft voice.

"As good as can be expected," Dad replied.

I looked over and saw tears in my Mom's eyes. I knew that they were doing their best to play tough, so that I wouldn't get scared. It wasn't working.

"My name is Dr. Burke. I will be working with you, Chief Swan."

After the pleasantries, he continued, "Well, I think its best to discuss treatment plans, and get started as soon as possible."

Following a lengthy discussion, a plan was made. Dr. Burke decided that after getting Charlie's blood counts stabilized through transfusions, they would start immediately with heavy chemotherapy. It hit me then - this was really happening.

"What should we expect?" Mom asked, her voice shakey.

Doctor Burke explained briefly how the side effects are different for everyone and could be severe.

"The most common side effects are nausea, drowsiness, and hair loss." He was listing off more, but at that point my brain had shut down all incoming information. It was just too much.

Dad would have to stay there that night, and for probably the next few nights while they started his treatment. After that, he would need to be brought in everyday and go through a four-hour sitting of chemo. As I listened, I took a minute to just look at him.

Yes, he looked sick, but only in a way that one would need to go lie down and sleep it off. I couldn't believe we were talking about cancer. I couldn't wrap my mind around that fact that the one person that always seemed to be invincible to me, was now going through this. He was only thirty-eight and had always been as healthy. As I looked over at my mom, I could tell the same thoughts were going through her head as well.

After hugs, and then some tears, on my part and my mom's, we reluctantly left. As I stepped outside, I was greeted by darkness and a light mist with a cold breeze. I welcomed them. The mist helped wash away the grime I was feeling from being in that hospital all day.

I couldn't help but feel a sense of abandonment on my part, leaving him there - in that cold, stark place alone to focus on the devastating news he just learned about his health. However, in true Chief Swan nature, when I expressed my concern he simply said that he was, "A big boy and was not scared, so you shouldn't be either." and to "go home get a good night's sleep and have a great day at school." He even encouraged me to go out with my friends the following day.

"Go out, have some fun. There's no need to sit in a stuffy room with me all day, I am just going to watch some sports and pretend I get a little extended vacation from work."

When he saw my expression that said, 'I know you, and I know that you are trying to be strong on my behalf, however, I am sixteen and not five and can handle more than you can think,' he added, "I promise everything will be fine, you're worrying for no reason."

On the way home with my mom, I thought about my life so far. I lived in the town of Forks, Washington. It was small, cold, and rainy here, but it was home. Charlie was the chief of Police in this small town, and Renee was mostly a stay-at-home mom. However, now that Charlie would not be able to work for a while, she would have to go back to work.

I had an ideal childhood. I was involved in all the typical school activities and always had my own cheerleading section that was made up of Charlie and Renee. My parents were great, and we've always been close. Mom was my best friend, but I was a daddy's girl all the way.

I went to one of the two high schools in Forks; I was a junior at Forks Private High. It was a tiny school that consisted of only one building - a remodeled church - with less than two hundred students. Wanting the best education possible for me, my parents worked hard to afford the tuition required to attend.

We spent the ride home in silence, both going through our own inner musings. As we pulled into the driveway of our two-story, modest house I was raised in. I realized, with all information that I had received my home felt off. It didn't have the same comfort that it once held for me. It seemed cold - unwelcoming even.

Mom turned to me and grabbed my hands. "He'll be back to normal before we know it," she said with passion.

I couldn't say anything in return. I looked into her tear-filled eyes and nodded. I went up to my room to have some time alone. Once I entered the familiar space, I felt myself relax. I kept my room clean - the organization of the space helped calm me. I took in the purple décor that went throughout the room, and my pictures of all of my friends that hung on my dresser mirror. They reminded me of happier times. I felt a sense of comfort, normalcy.

I ignored the calls from my friends, not wanting to explain anything. I went into the bathroom and looked at the mirror, realizing that my brown eyes were now bloodshot, and it was obvious I had been crying. I looked at my long brown hair and my small frame, analyzing what I saw. Even though I felt different, I still looked the same. I'm not sure what I had been expecting to see. I took a long shower, letting the hot water relax my muscles.

I didn't speak again that night, knowing that the second I opened my mouth I would burst into tears. I managed to keep them at bay and seem strong for my mom. I didn't need her worrying about me on top of everything else. However, the second I turned out the light and lay down, I cried into my pillow. I hoped the rain outside would muffle the noise of my sobs until I feel asleep.


	2. Chapter 2 My Best Friend

**_When everything is wrong Ill come talk to you_**

**_You make things alright when I am feeling blue_**

**_I am right here beside you_**

**_I will never leave you_**

**_And I feel the pain you feel, when you start crying_**

**_You're my best friend and I love you_**

**_-Weezer_**

I woke up in a haze. My eyes burned, my head hurt and my throat was sore. As I sat up in bed, all of the previous day's events came rushing back to me. It made my stomach turn. I put my feet on the cold hardwood floor and walked over to the window to look outside. As I pulled the curtains back, I was greeted with a grey, wet day. Perfect for the mood I was in. A knock at the door startled me.

"Come in."

"Hi honey, how are you feeling?" Mom asked.

She was in a big fluffy robe and looked a little better this morning than she did last night.

"I'm good," I responded.

"Get ready for school and come down and have breakfast with me?" she asked.

"OK, I'll be right down," I said with a smile.

With a large sigh, I walked over to my closet to get my clothes. Since the day looked like a washout I opted to just wear jeans and a sweatshirt. I went into the bathroom and looked into the mirror. I looked like a hopeless mess, but I couldn't find it in me to care. I pulled my hair back into a ponytail and put just a little makeup on. As I went back into my room, I heard a beeping. Rummaging around in my bag I found the culprit of the noise - my cell phone. The screen was lit up alerting me to eight missed calls and fifteen missed text messages.

Seven of these phone calls, and twelve of the texts, were from my best friend Alice Brandon. The others were from my best guy friend Emmett Mason. I didn't bother looking at them, knowing I was going to explain everything later in the day. When I thought of my friends, I felt a brief pain of guilt for the pity party I held for myself the day before.

I was lucky I had so many people who would be there for me if I just let them in, which I would, but I just couldn't the night before. I also felt bad because I knew Alice probably hadn't slept much better than I had; we were very close. Not only did we talk everyday, we saw each other most days, as well. I'm sure she was worried; it wasn't normal for me to miss school and go through a whole day without responding to any of her calls or messages.

We had been best friends since she moved here when she was ten. Alice was small, but she was a fireball. She was a tiny girl with short, spiky black hair and great style. Very sweet, but would ferociously defend her friends when she needed to. Alice was basically a member of my family; she calls my parents mom and dad She would take this news just about as hard as I did.

Alice's mom left when she was five. She declared that she just never wanted to be a mother and that Alice was a mistake. Alice never heard from her again. Her dad wasn't much better; he knew nothing of raising a child. He had no interest in learning, so he either ignored her or just acted like she was a burden. He supported her financially but that was it. Most nights she went home to an empty house and woke up to one as well.

Emmett wasn't as big of worry wart as Alice and I. Emmett moved here two years ago and we became friends immediately. We were all close, but Alice and he argued often. Emmett was a senior, so he was a year a head of us. He was a big guy, about 6'3" and was naturally well-built. You couldn't let the looks fool you though, he was no fighter or athlete, like his frame gave the impression of. He wasn't shy at all, but his personality didn't match his body. Most people wouldn't mess with him just because of his size. Aggression, however, was just not in his nature. Emmett came from a fairly well-off family, but he rarely spoke of them. We never went over to his house.

I had briefly met his parents once last year. Emmett got along with them okay, it seemed, but I had a feeling it wasn't the happiest home life. I knew that Elizabeth and Edward Sr. were very controlling and did irrational things just to keep that control. Emmett didn't talk about it much, but some things you just can't hide.

I did know his brother and he didn't get along - at all. Unlike Emmett, his brother was a fighter. According to Emmett, his brother was always causing some kind of trouble. He didn't elaborate, but he would often come to school with a black eye or split lip courtesy of his brother, Edward.

Emmett was not shy about his distain for Edward; he always said that the only good thing about Edward, was that he keeps his parents' heat off of him. Edward was a junior at the public school in town. His parents let him go there because apparently his dad wanted him to become a football star, and Forks Private didn't have a team. Emmett had nothing good to say about Edward. Although I am definitely on my friend's side, and I knew there was some truth in Emmett's words, there always seemed to be a hint of jealously towards his little brother. He tried to make him sound as bad as possible.

"Bella, you're going to be late!" Mom called up the stairs.

"I know. I'm coming!" I shouted back.

I shot Alice a quick text apologizing for worrying her.

Sorry to worry you! I'll explain everything today after school. You and Em.

"Coming!" I yelled again, grabbing my backpack and running down the stairs.

I sat down at our small kitchen table. I loved the kitchen. It was small, but nice; Charlie and Renee recently had it re-done with all new appliances. All the wood in the kitchen was dark, with stainless steel appliances. I loved to cook, and the kitchen was my haven. Alice and I cooked dinner often; we loved to play with new recipes. Mom always insisted that she could cook for us, but it was no secret that what she made was not usually not even edible.

Every time we cooked, Charlie insisted on coming in when he came home from work to do the "poison tests." Basically, his excuse to come in and eat before it was ready. It always seemed that he needed to do more "poison tests" when we were making desserts. His famous line was: "The dough could be deadly girls, let me make sure its safe." Just thinking about him made me laugh. The kitchen held good memories for me, and being in that room made me feel better.

"What are you laughing at?" Mom asked, as she brought two bowls of cereal and fruit over and sat down.

"Poison tests," was all I said.

She started laughing. She was very familiar with Charlie's jokes, and the poison test was just one of them. It felt good to laugh. We ate our cereal while talking about our plans for the day.

"Well I need to go to the station and fill them in on everything, and then I'll spend the rest of the day at the hospital, I'm sure." Mom said. "What are you going to do today?" she asked, while she started to put our dishes in the dishwasher.

"Um, school, I need to tell Alice and Em. I am sure that Alice will want to come to the hospital with me."

"Oh hun, you girls don't need to spend your free time at the hospital. Go do something fun, get your mind off everything," she insisted.

"No, I want to be there, and I'm sure Alice will want to as well," I said again.

"That's fine but... you know, maybe just you and Alice because-"

"I know, Mom. Emmett won't even want to come." I said cutting her off.

Mom and Dad liked Emmett, well Mom did. Dad didn't like any boys, at all. He tolerated Emmett and was always friendly to him. No matter how many times I insisted that Emmett was just my friend, my dad insisted just as adamantly that it wasn't possible for boys to have only friendships on their minds. For this reason, Dad never really trusted Emmett.

"I don't respect people that don't just show their true intentions," he always said when the issue was brought it up.

Don't get me wrong Charlie is a really funny, loving guy and the best dad, but he was also protective to a fault. To him, boys equaled the enemy. Alice and I would never let him forget the time he turned to us after a long argument on the subject and said,

"Don't argue about this with me, I know what boys think, I used to be one." Alice and I busted into a fit of giggles.

"Well, if you're not a boy then what are you?" I forced out between giggles. By this point Alice and I were rolling on the floor with tears in our eyes trying to breathe.

Charlie just rolled his eyes and grumbled, "You know what I mean."

And we did, but we still gave him a hard time about it. His sense of humor was one of the best things about him.

"Ok, well I will see you around four then?" Mom asked.

"Yep, right around then," I said.

I gave her a big hug and ran out to my truck to get to school on time. My truck was older than me with peeling red paint and rust, but I loved it. It started making noises a few days back and I forgot to mention it to my dad; I wasn't going to now. I started it up and it made a noise I would imagine something that was dying a horrible death would make. I figured the best policy was to turn my music up and pretend like I couldn't hear it. I did exactly that and drove to school. The rain had slowed up from the day before but the dark clouds overhead looked threatening.

I pulled into my usual spot for school, in the back of the lot by the woods. I saw Alice and Emmett's car on either side of me. When I got out, I was immediately jumped on by Alice.

"My god, Bella, I thought you were dead somewhere!" she screeched.

I couldn't help but laugh as Emmett peeled her off of me.

"Sorry, sorry I know. I should have called you." I said as I gave her a hug.

"What's going on? Is everything ok? Alice called me at least fifty times last night asking if I had heard from you." He said with a laugh.

"Um yeah guys everything's going to be okay, something happened but I don't want to talk about it right now. Can we talk after school?" I asked as tears formed in my eyes.

Emmett pulled me into a big hug. "Of course Bells."

"Why don't we just skip?" Alice asked like it was the most obvious answer in the world. "You didn't miss anything yesterday and today there are like three movies and just test reviews."

The idea was very appealing.

"We can go to my house, no one's home," she offered.

"Yeah you don't seem up to going into school today." Emmett said, only adding to the temptation.

"Ok that sounds good. Wait, Em your parents will freak if you skip." I said.

"Normally yes, but they're pretty pissed at Edward, so they wont even notice the call from the school about me."

I didn't even ask why, Emmett never gave any details, he usually just shrugged and we knew the conversation was closed.

"Okay, lets go but we can go to my house." I told them.

"Are you sure? What about your mom?" Alice asked.

"U-Um yeah what I need to tell you guys is one of the reasons that she isn't home," I stammered out trying to keep it together.

"Okay, well lets just get going before people know we were here, Lauren already saw us." Emmett said with a sneer, referring to the queen bitch of the school.

"I'll meet you guys there." I said, jumping in my truck.

It made the same awful noise when I started it up. I heard a tap on my window, and saw Em standing there. I rolled it down.

"What's up Em?" I shouted over the noise

"That sounds really bad; I'll look at it when we get to your house." He started laughing at the fact he was shouting at me, just so I could hear him.

Emmett didn't know a lot about cars, but he definitely knew more than I did. I appreciated the help since I couldn't ask my usual go-to man, Charlie. I thanked him as I rolled up the window, watching him jump into his jeep. When I backed out, I got behind Alice's cute little Volkswagen bug. It fit her perfectly. It was yellow and seemed happy, just like her. Her dad bought it for her when she turned sixteen.

Dale, her dad, just left it in the garage with an old napkin he wrote 'happy seventeenth birthday' on. Asshole didn't even know her age. The car was nice, but I'm sure Alice would have been much happier to have her dad care just a little. That was a rough night. Instead of having her sweet sixteen, she spent her special night crying. The next day when my parents got wind of it, my mom made her a cake and my dad took her out and taught her how to drive. He took us both to get our licenses.

I was only one block from home when the truck started shaking, and then it just…stopped.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me!" I yelled out to no one.

Emmett pulled up next to me, laughing.

"Sorry Bells, I just knew this thing was going to die." He chuckled.

At this point, I burst into tears and just let my head fall against the wheel.

"Oh Bells, I'm sorry don't cry, please. Please stop crying I didn't mean anything. I wasn't trying to make you cry." he was pleading.

"It's okay Em, it's not you." I said when I caught my breath, feeling stupid.

"What the hell did you say to her?" Alice was yelling at Emmett now.

"He didn't do anything Alice." I said.

"Bella just go inside I'll have Alice drive and I'll push it to the curb, no big deal."

"Thanks guys."

They knew me well enough to know I would not cry about something like my truck.

I went inside and pulled myself together. Not five minutes later, Alice and Emmett came in. We all went and sat in the living room, they looked at me expectantly.

"You can tell us anything Bella," Emmett said encouragingly. I gave him a weak smile.

I wanted to do it just like ripping off a Band-Aid. I just spit it all out. I told them everything. Before I was halfway through, Alice was crying with me, shaking her head "no." When I was done, they both wrapped me in a huge hug telling me everything would be alright. I loved my friends. For the first time since the previous day, I truly did believe everything would be okay. It took me saying it out loud, to realize how lucky Charlie really was. He had a great prognosis and the situation was as positive as it could be. Not everyone was that lucky.

"Well what the hell are we waiting for let's get to the hospital." Alice said with her keys in hand.

"Its noon they'll know we skipped school," I reminded her.

"Yeah," she said, taping her head like she was thinking. "Um, nope not worried, we get a free pass this time," she announced.

"You guys should go. Bella call me tonight?" Emmett asked.

Although he and Charlie got along it was not the most comfortable company for either of them.

"Yeah. Thanks Em, and thanks for pushing my truck." I gave him a big hug and he walked us out to Alice's car.

Alice and I pulled up to the hospital and ran in. When we rounded the corner we heard Charlie and Renee laughing. When we walked in the room the first thing we heard was Charlie announcing to Renee "I won!"

"Darn, I guess your right. Thanks a lot, girls." Mom said laughing.

Alice and I just looked at each other puzzled.

"Care to fill us in on the joke?" I asked.

"Oh we just had a bet going on. I said that there was no way worry warts like you two would make it through the day without running in here before school was out. Your mother had faith you would at least finish your school day." He laughed. "I won," he added with a grin.

"You two got a freebee today, but tomorrow you go back." Mom added pointing a finger at us.

At this point Alice and I threw ourselves at Charlie, hugging him; so thankful to see it was the same old Charlie. We spent the rest of the day at the hospital, watched TV, played cards, and gave the nurses who came in for his treatment a hard time. They were able to get his blood counts right and had started his chemo.

At about nine o'clock, Alice, Mom and I headed home. We called Em and let him know not to worry about us and gave him the 'so far so good' update. Alice stayed the night with me - not wanting to go home to an empty house. I fell into a deep sleep that night feeling much more optimistic and exhausted from the night before.


	3. Chapter 3 When You Were Young

_**He doesn't look a think like Jesus**_

_**But he talks like a gentlemen**_

_**Like you imagined**_

_**When you were young**_

_**-The Killers**_

**BPOV**

It had been a little over a week since we received the week had been crazy and hectic. Alice had stayed at our house since that night and had been driving me to and from school. I was grateful for that, because I didn't want Renee and Charlie knowing about my truck yet; they had enough to worry about.

Between trying to get caught up on the days I missed and spending every evening at the hospital, to say I was a little stressed was an understatement. The routine had been the same; playing card games, watching TV, and I added homework in the mix. Charlie still insisted everyday that Mom and I didn't need to be there to babysit him, but we just ignored him. Most of the time Alice would come too, and he had a lot of visitors from his station buddies as well. He was much loved at the station and all of his men respected him and had been very supportive. Some of the police wives had even brought dinner over a couple times, so we didn't have to cook.

That was all getting ready to change. Charlie was coming home. He would still have to go into the doctor everyday for his treatment, but at least we would have our evenings at home. Mom had taken a job at the jewelry store downtown. She would go with him on most days, but on the days that she had to work, Alice and I happily volunteered. We discussed this all when Charlie was asleep or we were not around him. Charlie was the type of man that didn't accept help easily; he was used to being the one people depended on, not the other way around.

Even though it had only been a little over a week, the effects of the chemo was evident. He was weaker and tired. Dr. Burke assured us that this was very normal for the high dose he was receiving. He also insisted that Charlie not drive himself to and from the treatments, saying that the side effects would just get worse from there. We agreed, he was in no state to drive.

Alice and I were on our way to school and making plans for the night, since we would no longer have to be at the hospital. I was never much of a partier and didn't really date. Loud drunk people and horny boys drooling all over every girl didn't appeal to me. Not to mention if cops were called I would get a personal police escort home by my Dad - that wouldn't be embarrassing at all. I didn't date guys from school because it was so small, and there was no one there worth the drama to me. Because I didn't party, I hadn't really hung out with anyone else from the public school. Alice got out more than I did; she was not a wild partier but definitely went out more. She had gotten a couple of those personal escorts from Charlie herself.

Alice has never had a real boyfriend either, but was more experienced with boys than I was - not that that was hard to do. Em was not into parties either, so on the nights that she would go out we would just watch movies and stuff. Well, as long as his parents weren't around. They were really weird about him having a social life.

When Alice and I pulled into the lot, we noticed that Em was already there waiting for us. We were ten minutes early, so we were standing by Alice's car talking about what we should do that night when we heard squealing tires. I turned around to place the noise and saw an older model silver Volvo heading straight for us. The owner of the vehicle slammed on his breaks and jumped out of the car. He looked pissed.

The next thing I knew he was storming over to us. I looked at Alice and she looked just as confused as I felt. Em didn't though he looked… I dunno, scared I guess? I looked back at the guy and realized that even in his state of rage he was handsome. He was about six foot tall, not huge but had an athletic build. His hair was this unusual color of brown and was a mess on the top of his head, but it worked. He had the brightest green eyes I had ever seen. When I took in his attire I noticed that the buttons on his shirt weren't lined up, he looked disheveled, but was still, by far, the most beautiful boy I had ever seen.

"What the fuck Emmett?" He was yelling now. "Trying to get me into deeper shit by driving away with all my crap in your car?"

"I have no idea what you are talking about." Em said, looking almost as scared as I was sure we did.

"What the fuck ever! Just give me your keys, so I can get my stuff."

Without saying anything else, the two walked over to Em's jeep. The crazy guy pulled what looked like a backpack out of the Jeep. They were out of ear shot, but you could tell they were arguing.

"Who the fuck does that guy think he is?" Alice turned to me and asked.

"I dunno I have never seen him before."

"Well this is bullshit. He can't just come to our school and cause problems."

With that, Alice started marching toward them. I tried to stop her, but she was too fast.

Getting closer to the crazy guy did not seem like the best choice to me. I started to walk toward her to stop her, when I noticed he was staring right at me. I couldn't look away from his gaze; the expression on his face was hard to read when he was staring at me. He looked… ashamed almost. Then all of a sudden, he was looking down and very amused. He was looking at Alice, who was yelling at him. He towered over her small frame. Once out of my trance, I ran over to stop her. We didn't know who this guy was or what he would do. Why in the hell was Emmett just standing there watching her? I grabbed Alice by her elbow trying to pull her back.

Crazy turned to Em in the middle of Alice's rant "Well this has been fun, and it was great meeting your bodyguards, but I've got to go."

He spun around and faced us and his demeanor completely changed. He looked right at me. "I'm sorry if I scared you." He seemed so sincere. He smiled at us and added, "Have a great day ladies."

How did he do that, go from mad man to charming gentleman in a matter of seconds?

With that he jumped back in his Volvo and sped away, while the three of us just watched.

Still angry - not impressed in the least by his charm - Alice looked at Emmett and asked,

"Who in the hell was that asshole?"

"Unfortunately, that was my brother, Edward." Em replied embarrassed.

I don't know why, but I was shocked. I couldn't believe that, that was the brother Em had made sound so horrible. There was no doubt that he lived up to the description of a hothead just now - just like Em described in the past – but there was something else I couldn't place. When he looked at me, I saw more than just anger; there was pain and panic. I had no idea why, but I wanted to hurt whoever was putting him in that pain, and make it go away. I couldn't help but feel that there was more to the story then Emmett ever let on.

The rest of the day was uneventful; no one mentioned the Edward incident again. I, however, couldn't help thinking about him. I couldn't get him out of my head, and I wasn't sure I wanted to.

**EPOV**

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." repeated by "Shit, where the hell did I put it?" That was the mantra of my morning as I ran around the whole house looking for my goddamn backpack. I woke up twenty minutes past the time my alarm clock was supposed to go off. My room was such a mess that I had to grab dirty shit off the floor to wear. I was now running around looking for my shit while getting dressed at the same time. Then it hit me like a fucking ton of bricks, I left my shit in Emmett's Jeep. "Fuck my life!" I yelled out loud, realizing he had already left for school.

I had to be Dad's bitch last night - part of my extensive punishment for missing practice last week. I had to use Em's Jeep to go pick up his shit that he ordered from Home Depot.

Realizing I was going to have to stop at Emmett's excuse for a school on the way to mine, I grabbed my keys and ran out the door. No shower, no breakfast. I noticed on the way out, the fly on my jeans was still down and the buttons on my shirt didn't line up. "Whatever," I muttered starting up my car. I was flying down the road, away from my house, needing to get there as fast as humanly possible.

We not only moved to the tiniest town in the world two years ago, but it was also the rainiest and most depressing place on the planet. It only added to my "happy" home life. I liked Chicago, where we moved from. I was quiet at school and tried to blend into the background as much as possible. Kids in Chicago didn't even know I talked until I got pissed and freaked out on someone. Here, it wasn't as easy. Everyone in this small town was so goddamn nosey. I still tried though. I was embarrassed and didn't want friends; I didn't want people knowing the skeletons in my family's closet. There was only one person I socialized with at school, Jasper. He was a cool and funny guy. I made sure to keep him at a distance though.

I would go sit through my classes, go to football practice and come home to hell. I didn't date, I didn't go to parties. I was just trying to get through so that when I turned eighteen I could get the hell out. I couldn't be late; it was just not an option. I was still paying for missing practice last week.

If I was tardy or missed one more class I would have to sit out of a game. I couldn't care less about missing a game, but Dad would freak. If I had to sit out a game the real show would start - that's when Dad's face would turn purple and he would start shaking and shit. Even though it would be my fault and he would make sure I paid, he would also march into the school and freak out on the coaches for not letting me play, embarrassing the hell out of me.

My parents found out that Emmett skipped a whole fucking day of school and they said nothing; they were too busy being pissed at me. I miss one goddamn football practice and the world comes crumbling down.

When I pointed this out, Dad said, "Just shut your goddamn mouth Edward."

Emmett just gave me a smug smirk; I wanted to beat it off his face. Emmett and I had never gotten along; we couldn't be any more different. Fuck, nobody in our house got along. Yeah, I was a hothead but he knew every button I had, and he pushed them whenever he could, causing me to flip out on him once in a while. I always came out fine, but he would be left with a mark or two. Not my fault he couldn't fight - he shouldn't start shit he couldn't finish.

I'd never been to Emmett's school, but it's not like it was hard to find in this joke of a town. I pulled into the lot of the one-building school and saw Em's Jeep immediately; I sped up and jerked to a stop jumping out. There he was standing by a couple of girls.

His eyes widened when he finally saw me coming towards him. I probably looked like a crazy man, but I was in a hurry to get the hell out of there.

"What the fuck, Emmett?" I yelled at him. "Trying to get me into deeper shit by driving away with all my crap in your car?"

Both girls just stared at me with wide eyes looking like I had two heads.

"I have no idea what you are talking about." He said looking almost as scared as the two girls by him. "What the fuck ever. Just give me your keys, so I can get my stuff."

We walked over to the Jeep, leaving his sidekicks behind with their mouths hanging open. When he unlocked it, I wrenched my backpack out and went to leave.

"Hey man, you can't just barge in here, cussing and stuff like that," Emmett declared, grabbing my arm. I turned around to face him, looking down at my arm and back up at him. He let go immediately. I was pissed.

I was ready to really start my rant when I caught two big, brown eyes staring my way looking terrified. I wanted to yell "enjoying the show?" but I just couldn't. She looked so scared and I had no idea why it bothered me, but it did. I didn't want her to be scared and especially not of me. Her little elf friend next to her, however, just looked…pissed, like she was ready to kick my ass. Right then, the little black-haired elf came storming up to me, breaking me out of my trance.

"Who the hell are you, and why do you think that you can just barge in here yelling at Emmett?" she demanded, with her hands on her hips.

I just stared down at her. I was really impressed actually - not that I was that scary of a motherfucker - but she was like really tiny, and had no idea who I was. I will admit that I was acting somewhat crazy, and she still had no issue marching right up and trying to put me in my place. Like I said, impressive. She was never in danger though, because no matter how pissed I ever got I would never hurt a girl. I wouldn't even yell at one, and usually didn't even cuss in front of them. She didn't know that though, and still she showed no fear. Next thing I knew, brown eyes came over and was pulling elf away by her elbow, trying to diffuse the situation. I didn't want to waste anymore time on fighting with Emmett and decided I should try to still get to school on time.

I turned to Em, who was still standing there letting a girl fight his battles - God, he was such a pansy. "Well, this has been fun, and it was great meeting your bodyguards, but I've got to go."

I turned my attention back to the two girls, trying to salvage what ever I could - I don't know why, but I didn't want brown eyes to hate me.

"I'm sorry if I scared you," I said looking right at her. "Have a great day, ladies," I said, giving them my best smile.

With that, I jumped back into my Volvo and sped away. Getting to school was not on my mind anymore. I had no idea why, but I couldn't get those brown eyes out of my head, and I wasn't sure if I wanted to.


	4. Chapter 4 Shoot Down the Stars

_**We bring ourselves down**_

_**And build ourselves up in disappointment**_

_**How fragile we are**_

_**So fragile we are, we just don't show it**_

_**We'll shake up this town**_

_**And shoot down the stars for our enjoyment**_

_**-Gym Class Heroes**_

**BPOV**

What a difference a month can make. If you would have told me a month ago that I would be spending roughly four nights a week in the outpatient wing of the hospital in Forks, waiting for Charlie to finish his chemo, I would have laughed in your face and asked you what you were smoking. No, this was not a joke though. Things had gotten tough.

Living in a small town means everyone knows your business. Your dad being the Chief in said town, makes it even worse. Everyone kept asking me when they saw me,

"How's your dad?" or, "How is your mom holding up?" Another popular one, "How are you doing?" The only thing worse than the constant questions, were the looks of pity.

I know it sounded bad, but I just didn't want to think about it. I lived with it twenty-four, seven. When I went to school I just wanted to be Bella , not the poor girl with the sick dad. Charlie, poor Charlie, it was killing me watching him go through this.

Dr. Burke kept saying that everything looked good and he was right on track. If he didn't insist that it was supposed to be this bad I would have never have thought this was "on track." Charlie was sicker than I had ever seen him. Since the treatment, he was on was such an aggressive approach, that the effects of the chemo, or poison - my name for it - had already affected him so much. Not everyone gets side affects, but poor Charlie seemed to be getting a taste of them all.

He was nauseous, tired, and he was starting to loose his hair. He was just completely miserable. Not everyone would know it though. He kept his sense of humor. When the guys from the station would come by, he would still joke around with them and give them a hard time. He still gave me trouble about Emmett and was still there for Alice when she would run to us when Dale was being an ass. Most of all he tried so hard to keep his suffering from me and Mom. We saw right through it though.

Poor Mom was exhausted, working full time now and trying to be with Dad as much as she could. Even though he insisted he was fine, and slept most of the time, we still didn't want to leave him alone for too long. Mom was also trying to make sure that I hadn't been giving up too many things. Insisting I go to the movies, hang out with Alice and Emmett. She would go as far as calling them behind my back and having them kidnap me and take me to do something fun. It was one of those days. We were leaving school and Alice had just passed the turn to my house.

"Alice, you just missed the turn," I told her, knowing she already knew.

"I know, we're going out to have a fun day. Em had to run home, but he's gonna meet us at my house," she said.

"Alice, I'm sorry but I just really want to get home. Charlie goes to treatment in an hour, and I wanted to eat and stuff before we go to the doctor."

"Nope, sorry," was all she said.

"What do you mean, 'no, sorry'?" I asked, a little harsher than I had meant to.

She let out a big sigh and tilted her head so she could see me while still watching the road.

"I promised Renee I wouldn't let you within three miles of that place. It's Friday and we're gonna have a fun night."

Well, shit. Hearing that, I felt my eyes get wet. I had been doing this lately - crying for no reason whatsoever; I hoped it was just stress.

"Bella, hun, stop. We're gonna have fun. You act like I'm kicking your puppy, I'm just trying to take you out for some fun" Alice pulled in her driveway and gave me a big hug.

"I know, I'm really sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me."

"If you really don't wanna go out, we can just hang out here"

"No, it's fine. We should go, we haven't done anything in forever. I wanna go. Thanks Alice." I tried to sound convincing.

"Anytime." She winked and got out of the car.

We walked into Alice's condo; they lived on the opposite side of town from me. Her dad owned this condo, but it felt more like a bachelor pad. It was very plain with minimal decorations. Natural colors, and very cold looking. The biggest decoration in the whole place was the big screen TV hanging on the wall. We went to grab a snack from the kitchen but could not find anything. When Dale was home, they ordered take out. When he wasn't, Alice usually ate with us. We gave up on our food hunt and headed upstairs to Alice's room. When we got to the top of the stairs we heard a noise coming from a room down the hall.

"Dad, is that you?" Alice shouted down the hall.

No answer.

We walked down to peek our heads in the room that was his office. There was Dale, sitting at his huge desk with a phone glued to his ear. Everything in his office was top of the line. It had built-in shelves filled with books. All the wood in the room was a dark cherry. Dale was a big shot lawyer who worked mostly in Seattle and sometimes further south, in Olympia. We were surprised to see him home. He was making a shushing motion telling us to be quiet.

"I know that. No, you stop... I don't care. My client had every right to be there."

Whoever he was talking to, it wasn't a pleasant conversation.

"You're not listening to me, my client was scheduled to be there and had every right to be. You know what? That's fine we will see you in court on Monday." He hung up, slamming his phone on his desk.

He let out a big sigh and slouched back into his chair. "What did you need, Alice?" he asked, while rubbing both his eyes with one hand.

"Oh nothing, Dad. Sorry to bug you, we just heard you in here, and I was surprised. I didn't think you were going to be home today."

"Well, I'm here, but I am leaving in about an hour." He said glancing down at his watch. "I have to be at court early on Monday morning in Seattle, and my client just got himself put in jail. Hi Bella, how's your dad?" he asked while opening his laptop and starting to read something.

"He's okay, Mr. Brandon, thank you."

Alice jumped in excitedly, "So were gonna go see this awesome new movie tonight with-"

"Alice," he cut her off. "I'm sorry, but I need to get ready to leave, is this something that can wait?"

I looked at Alice, and she looked like she was on the verge of tears.

"Oh yeah, of course... sorry." She quickly walked away, leaving me standing in the doorway alone.

"Er... um, have a safe trip, Mr. Brandon." After my awkward send off, I made my way to Alice's room.

Alice's room was a stark difference from the rest of the house. It was decorated in soft pink, with lighter pink swirls all over the walls. She had a huge bed with a million pillows all over it. One of those beds you want to just jump into, even if you're not tired. She had a closet the size of a small room, and a wardrobe that most high school girls would die for. I scanned the room and saw Alice sitting on her pink and green polka dot chair, in the corner by the window, with tears on her face.

"Oh, Alice, I'm sorry. He's just in a hurry. I don't think he meant to brush you off."

She looked at me like I was nuts and rolled her eyes. "Bella, for reals that's all he ever does." She shrugged her shoulders and continued, "I dunno, I just see your dad and realize it could happen to anyone. I want to know my dad, and if something happened to him right now, I wouldn't even know the person that he was."

The sad part was that it was true. I knew Dale just about as well as Alice did.

I knew that nothing else I said would make her feel better, so I just gave her a hug and reminded her how much my family and Em loved her.

She wiped her eyes and looked at me. "God, I am such a bitch, Bella. I'm so sorry - I'm complaining about my dad when yours is -"

"Stop!" I said cutting her off, this was not the conversation I wanted to have.

"Its fine. You have all the reason in the world to be upset." And then I made the ultimate sacrifice to make my friend happy "So are you gonna make me over for our night out or what?"

"Oh my god!" she shrieked. "What time it is? Em should be here any minute; we have to get started." Just like that, her mind was on fashion, and I just sacrificed myself to be Alice's project for the night. I didn't mind dressing up and wearing a little makeup but Alice took it to a whole other level. She sat me down and got started.

Alice was ready. She was wearing a light green cardigan with sequins with a long cream top underneath that she had paired with leggings and suede boots. Alice would look adorable in anything she wore.

My makeup was finished, I was fully dressed, and we were just finishing my hair when there was a knock downstairs.

"That's Em, don't move." She then ran out the door.

When she left, I looked into the mirror. She did do a good job, as always. I was wearing dark skinny jeans with a dark grey off-the-shoulder sweater and black knee-high boots, I really liked the boots. She had made up my eyes kinda dark and smoky, but overall very natural looking. We didn't do much with my hair - it was already kinda curly, so she just pulled it back halfway.

I could hear them talking, before they walked into the room.

"I know, Alice, but it doesn't start for an hour, we don't-" Emmett stopped mid sentence when he walked into the room. He just stood there and stared at me.

"Um, hi Em," I said trying to figure what was wrong with him.

"Bella you look… great."

He was still staring. This was new, and it made me uncomfortable.

"Um thanks." I said lamely.

"Bella, sit, so I can finish real fast." I was thankful for Alice's interruption, because Em was being just… weird.

"So, Em, do you wanna take your car tonight?"

Emmett walked over and sat on the bed while Alice finished my hair. "Yeah, that's fine," he said, still acting kind of weird.

After we were both ready, we all sat on the bed and just hung out till we needed to leave. Right when we were getting ready to go, Em's phone rang. He pulled it out and looked at it.

"It's Edward," he said rolling his eyes.

Just the sound of his name put butterflies in my stomach. It had been about three weeks since his big show in the school parking lot. I couldn't get him out of my head. I felt so stupid, too, because I hadn't even talked to him. I could just tell that he was hurting and couldn't stop thinking about him.

When I tried to ask Emmett about him a couple weeks ago he just said, "Edward's a jerk, forget about him." Effectively closing the subject.

"What do you mean they're coming home?" Emmett's conversation pulled me from my thoughts; he was pacing in front of the bed. "I know, but they said tomorrow. Shit!"

Alice and I just looked at each other, confused. This had happened with Em a couple of other times. We would be going somewhere and he would just say that he had to get home, but never elaborate.

"Okay. Thanks, Edward. Okay... bye." He closed his phone and just looked down at the ground.

"What's going on Em?" Alice asked.

"My parents weren't supposed to be home until tomorrow; Edward was just giving me a heads up that they will be home within an hour."

"And?" we both asked at the same time.

"Um, well they've been in a bad mood lately, and it's probably better that I'm not out when they get home."

"Why would they care?" Alice asked perplexed.

"They just do, alright," He snapped "Look, I'm sorry, but I... I gotta go. You guys have fun tonight."

"Okay. Bye, Em." We didn't know what else to say.

"Well that was weird," Alice said after he left.

"Yeah I know. He's done that before. It seems like if his parents are pissed about something, things get kinda bad at home, but other times he comes out and it's fine."

Even though we were all close, and Emmett knew everything there was to know about Alice and me - well except that I was hooked on his brother that he hates, and that I have never spoken to - he stayed very private about his home life. We knew his mom worked in management at the hospital. His dad worked out of town a lot, as a consultant. He would go to other companies and help them run more efficiently.

Even though I didn't know much about his parents, I did know Emmett could do more stuff when they weren't around and he was happier.

"Well that was nice of Edward to call him," I said to Alice. She shot me a look that said that she could see right through me.

She rolled her eyes. "I guess. Wait…" Alice looked at me again, and I knew I was busted. "You like him don't you?"

"What? No, I don't even know him," I said, acting shocked. Maybe sounding a little defensive.

"I know, but ever since we saw him you've brought him up like three times," she pointed out.

Okay... so subtleness wasn't my strong point. I just shrugged. "Well, should we get going?" I asked, trying to change the subject.

"Yeah, let's go," she said jumping off the bed.

We ended up having an awesome girl's night; we rocked out to music in Alice's car to and from the theater. We stuffed our faces with popcorn and candy and watched the girliest movie possible. I was really glad we went out in the end. After the movie we stopped by the store to load up on more junk food. We went back to Alice's and got into our pajamas, ate way too much ice cream and gossiped the night away. By the time we made it to bed we were both exhausted. I don't know if it was from a sugar high or what, but I dreamt of Edward all night.


	5. Chapter 5 Numb

**_I've become so numb I can't feel you there_**

**_Become so tired so much more aware_**

**_I'm becoming this all I want to do_**

**_Is be more like me and be less like you_**

**_-Linkin Park_**

**EPOV**

"I don't know why," I said again to Emmett.

Dumb fucker kept asking the same question.

"No. No idea, they just said an hour." He was rambling, I really didn't want to talk to him so I just said, "I gotta go, bye."

I just called Em to warn him that Mom and Dad would be home in about an hour, a night earlier than they were supposed to be. I don't even know why I did it for him, it's not like he would ever try to help me.

Dad had a business trip and Mom had gone with him this time. They were both in a shitty mood. Well, Dad was always in a shitty mood, but mom, she was a little different. She could be really sweet and motherly, and then, out of nowhere, she could turn and be your worst nightmare.

They were both the most controlling people I had ever met, but in different ways from one another. For that reason, I knew Mom would be pissed that Emmett was out without her permission. He was almost eighteen for fuck's sake, but she was a control freak. Then, when she got pissed that made Dad pissed, and everything would turn to shit real fast. That's why I didn't even try for a social life, it wasn't worth it.

Dad considered Emmett a big disappointment - the physique of a football star with not one ounce of interest or talent for sports in his body. He tried to make Emmett play before, but then declared him an embarrassment and made him quit. Em wanted our parents' approval so bad. It was pathetic. He was always trying to be being the perfect son. He went to the school that they wanted him to go to, got great grades, and sucked up better than anyone I had ever met. When shit got bad around the house, he kept his mouth shut and did whatever he needed to do to ride out the storm. He had never stood up to either one of them.

Dad couldn't care less what we were doing and who we were with as long as we had played his slaves and did everything he wanted us to do that day. After all, that's all were good for according to the him. Mom, however, wanted to control our every move. She wanted to know who we were with, and what we were doing, at all times.

Dad hadn't wanted any kids at all. Mom begged him and talked him into it. That was how Em came along. After that, he said he was done. Well, he thought so anyway.

Barely a year later, Mom started begging for another child. There was no way he was gonna give in, so what'd she do? She stopped her pills and got pregnant without his knowledge, and that was how I came along. When he found out what she did, he demanded that she have the pregnancy terminated. Since I was here, obviously she didn't do it.

What she did do though is name me after him to try to butter him up to me, but that didn't work. He had no problem reminding me constantly that he never wanted me, that it embarrassed him for me to have his name. He would forever punish me for her sin. Over the years it seems that she regretted her actions. Realized that maybe forcing a baby on her husband wasn't the best choice. So at times she made sure to show her resentment towards me as well.

So, not only was I not wanted at all, I was also the "fuck up of the family" according to him. I made decent grades in school; I rarely got in trouble outside of home. I'd been in my share of fights, but I didn't start them. I defended myself when I needed to. Yeah, I would fuck Emmett up when he pissed me off, but I also didn't let anyone mess with him. In Chicago, we were in the same school. People didn't know much about me, but they knew not to fuck with me or my family.

What made me a fuck up to him, apparently, was that I didn't give a shit what they thought about me. I did what I needed to do to get by, and that meant becoming numb to everything around me. I used to let what he said affect me - not anymore. Like I said, I stood up for myself when I needed to, and that meant to my dad, too. There was nothing Dad hated more than that. I just had to finish my Junior and Senior year and then I'd be gone and didn't plan on seeing any of these fuckers for a long time if I could help it.

According to him the only thing that made my existence worth anything, was that I could play football. He had forced me to do it since I learned to throw a ball. I was the running back at Forks High. I liked the game alright, but it wasn't worth it. If we lost the game, or if I made a mistake, it was guaranteed that he would be screaming at me for the following day or two. He would usually throw a shitload of punishments on top of that. Football became one giant punishment. Thank God he was out of town a lot. Whenever he was in town, he would come and watch practices. If that wasn't bad enough, he would then follow the team to the locker room, where he didn't belong, and listen to the coaches talk to the team. Embarrassed the shit out of me.

I would have quit but it wouldn't have been worth the horrible hell he would have surely put me through if I had. Some people were meant to never reproduce, and he was one of them. Mom was too, maybe, or maybe she would've been a better mom if she hadn't been with him. Who knows?

I decided to walk through the house to make sure everything was clean and in place. Mom and Dad made good money and we had a nice home; there was a large kitchen with top-of-the-line appliances. There were four bedrooms, and a huge den downstairs. The house was all professionally decorated. Mom had it looking like a museum - everything felt too nice to sit on or touch. Our house didn't have the homey feel to it at all; I always felt like I was an unwelcome guest in someone else's home. The only place I was comfortable in was my room.

Right as I finished my walk through the house, the front door opened and Emmett walked in.

"Hey man, thanks for calling."

"Yep," was all I said back.

Fucker should thank me. Not only would he never do that for me, but he also threw me under the bus every chance he could get to take the heat off of himself.

Not ten minutes later Mom and Dad came home. Dad was an asshole, as usual. He didn't speak to me or Emmett, and went straight up to their room and slammed the door. Fine by me. Mom drowned her bad mood with a bottle of wine as fast as she possibly could.

I locked myself in my room for the night. It was Friday night, and I was stuck at home with my sorry excuse for parents all weekend. I really had nowhere to go, but I couldn't have even if I did. The only thing I liked to do around here was to walk around our property. There was a little stream if you walked through the woods. It was peaceful. I was still on lockdown, though, for being late to school the day that I had to do my grand detour to Em's school to get my shit. That was the final tardy that resulted in my being benched for a game. Obviously, that didn't go over well, so three weeks later, I was still paying for it.

I loved my room; it was painted a dark blue and had a ton of windows. We lived on the outskirts of town, so the view from the windows was field and forest - green and a shit load more green. My room was plain; I had my bed and dresser, but other than that my CDs lined on the walls, that was about it. Music was my escape. I used to play piano until Dad decided that I looked, "like a sissy playing that stupid thing." The next day it was gone. So, after that, I just turned my love for playing music into listening to it. Music could alter my mood. Calm me, or sometimes make me angrier

As I lay in bed, I thought about that day that I went to Em's school. I would do it again just to be able to see her. Ever since then, I couldn't get those brown eyes out of my head. I wanted to see her again. I wanted to talk to her. I never wanted things like that before, never wanted to let anyone in. When I asked Em about her a couple days later he told me that her name was Bella, and according to him she thought, "I was the biggest asshole she had ever seen." He told me to stay away from her.

I asked him if he was dating her and he just mumbled and stuttered. I took it as a big fucking no; yeah I didn't think so. I really just wanted to get her out of my head. Even if it was possible to be in a relationship with her, I was sure she would want nothing to do with me. I had made a huge prick of myself that day. I was tired of lying there thinking, so I turned on Radiohead and just tuned out, wanting to sleep the weekend away.

On Monday morning, I woke up early to make sure I was on time for school. The house was quiet. Mom and Dad were already at work and Em had already left for school.

The weekend ended up not being too bad; the parents chilled out a little. I did a shit ton of yard work and hid in my room when I could. As I pulled up to school, I realized I was early, so I wanted to finish some home work in the library. Before I could even get there, though, I got soaked from the fucking deluge that they call rain. I walked into the library and shook off like a dog trying to get dry. I sat down to work on my biology, but the bell rang before I could even get anything accomplished.

As I walked out of the library, trying to stay under the eves of the building in an attempt to stay out of the rain on the way to my first class I heard, "Hey Nancy wait up!" I turned to see Jasper running at me with his books over his head, blocking the rain. He was a cool guy, and he usually had good stories. He was easy to be around. He always tried to get me to go out, but never asked questions.

"Don't fucking call me Nancy," I growled.

"Jeez, sorry, Trisha, you on the rag?"

I just rolled my eyes and kept walking while Jasper told me of his drunken sex-filled weekend. Jasper didn't look like he should be from here. He looked like a surfer with his shaggy light brown hair and clothes that looked like they had never been washed. It worked for him though; he had every girl trying to get with him. When I first came here, they tried with me too. After brushing them off, they either thought I was a stuck-up asshole or was hiding a girlfriend from Chicago. Some still tried, but most had gotten the hint.

Jasper was the man slut of Forks High and had no shame in everyone knowing it. It caused a lot of problems for him, too. There was always drama with him - sleeping with someone's girlfriend, or a girl thinking he was her boyfriend. Jasper didn't do the boyfriend-girlfriend thing; as he said he just liked to, "have fun". I really didn't know who he hadn't been with, except for his sister Rosalie - who was the exact opposite of him. Jasper was outgoing, funny, and the life of the party. Rose was quiet, and came off a little cold.

"So, then I was like, 'So you wanna suck it or what?' Man, you should have been there, she looked at me like she was gonna rip out my throat." Jasper had started laughing at his own story.

I nodded my head and laughed along so he would think I was listening.

"Speak of the ice queen." Just then Kate, the girl Jasper had been talking about, came walking towards us.

"Hi, Eddie, how are you?" she asked trying to be sexy. She was fluttering her lashes - trying to flirt, but she just looked like she had something in her eye. "Do you have a date for the dance next Saturday?"

She knew I wouldn't go; I never went. So, I mumbled a "hi" and "no" and just kept walking.

"Psh, she doesn't know who she's messin' with. Trying to make me jealous, what a joke." He said loud enough for her to hear.

"So man your not gonna go?"

I just looked at him, he already knew I wouldn't go. "Nope. you?" I asked

He then stated that yes, he did want to go, but he was in a bad spot. He was in a bad spot because he'd literally fucked over every girl in the school, and while they were dumb enough to still go with him if he asked, he didn't want a night of drama.

"Eh, I'll probably just stay home and smoke a shit load of weed. Dude, you should come over."

"Yeah, okay, I might" I said, but he knew I wouldn't be there. That was just easier than coming up with an excuse as to why I wouldn't.

He was ready to go on about his weekend plans, but we had made it to biology, and Mr. Banner started right when we sat down.

The school day dragged on, so by the time I made it to practice, I was in no mood to be there. I was running through my drills just trying to get done so I could shower and go home to listen to my music.

"Listen up," Coach yelled to get our attention. Coach Dave was a good guy. He was a big burly dude, about 6' 4", and was as bald as a man could be. He dressed like your typical coach - whistle and all. If you didn't know him his looks would have been intimidating as hell, but he was really a patient guy. All the guys on the team respected him. He had put up with my dad's interruptions, and even tried to cover for me before because he had seen my dad's reactions to shit. Dad had no issue with coming in there and demanding things that the coach should do differently. Coach would usually be patient with him, but God, did I love it when he would tell my dad to "get the hell off his field."

"Ok we have a big game coming up against Port Angeles next week; we need to work on some offense. Mason."

I looked up to give him my attention.

"Half back dive off tackle."

I nodded. We got into position on the field, and were ready to go. The play went perfect and I ran the ball across the line, making a touchdown. Just as I finished running the play, Mike Newton took me out by my knees. My legs shot out from underneath me, and I flew in the air, slamming my head and back down on the ground, knocking the wind out of me. Cheap motherfucker. I jumped up, ready to beat the shit out of him when Coach Dave came running up to us.

"Newton, run!" He ordered Mike with laps for the late tackle.

"You ok Masen?" he asked.

"Yeah, fine. Just dizzy. Give me a minute," I said standing up. I started walking back to the center of the field to do the play again.

"Sorry bud, but you gotta go get checked out," Coach said as I started to walk away.

"What? Why? I'm fine." Why in the hell would I need to get checked out?

"School policy. You hit your head, you're dizzy, and you're wobbling like a drunk guy; those are signs of concussion. You can't play with a concussion."

What the fuck ever! I was not "wobbling". I don't think I had ever, in my entire life, fucking wobbled.

I took my helmet off and rolled my eyes. "Coach, seriously, I'm fine."

"Sorry, bud, if you don't go get cleared you can't practice," he said with a shrug and walked away from me.

Fuck, if I didn't practice I couldn't play and I was still in trouble from the game three weeks before.

"Whatever," I said as I started walking away.

"Yorkie! Drive Masen to the doctor, will ya?"

Fuck, you have to be kidding me! Now I couldn't even drive myself to the doctor? I was fine. What kind of pussy goes to the doctor for hitting their head anyway?

I went to the locker room and showered, changing back in to my jeans and sweatshirt from that morning. As I walked to Eric's car, I was planning Newton's fucking demise.

As we drove across town, toward the hospital, it was fucking awkward. Eric was a nice enough guy, but we had just never talked. He was also best friends with Newton and was probably scared I wanted to kick his ass. He drove under the speed limit the whole damn way and I swear he was playing the Jonas brothers or some shit. I wanted to dig my ears out. I made a mental note to give Jazz this info later so he could have a field day with Yorkie. When we pulled up to the hospital, I thanked Eric and climbed out of his shitty Dodge Neon.

Since it was after five, every doctor's office would be closed, so I would have to go into the Emergency Room. Mom worked in management on the psych floor, and I was hoping someone working there liked her and would have pity on me, getting me in fast. I called to let her know where I was going so she wouldn't freak out when I wasn't home on time.

"Hello," Mom answered.

"Hey Mom."

"Hi Edward, how are you?"

"I'm good, but, uh, I hit my head in practice and I have to stop by to get cleared from a concussion so I can practice tomorrow." I explained.

"Oh Hun, how did that happen?" She asked.

I explained the whole thing and she told me that Dad had left for business in Colorado for a week, so I didn't need to worry about that. She also said she would call to see who was working, so they could possibly squeeze me in without waiting forever.

"Ok, well, I am gonna need a ride home, 'cause Coach wouldn't let me drive."

"Just give me a call, and I will come and get you," she offered.

"Thanks mom, Bye" She was in an unusually good mood.

I hung up the phone and walked into the ER. The room was mostly empty. There was a woman with a screaming toddler. She was trying to calm her by giving her toys, and talking to her. It wasn't working. Another had a screaming little boy that looked to be about eight, with a big cut down his arm. A man was sitting in the corner with his head in his lap, rocking back and forth. There were just a few others sitting around waiting.

I walked up to the front desk, where there was an older woman with red hair, dressed in scrubs. She looked like she put her makeup on during a turbulent plane ride. Her hot pink lipstick was spread all around the outside of her lips, and her bright blue eye shadow went above her eye brows. I didn't know a damn thing about makeup but I did know that didn't look right.

"Hi, um, my name is Edward Masen and-"

"Oh my goodness, your Liz's boy, you are such a handsome young man!" Fuck she was shouting, causing everyone to look my way.

"Um, thanks, so I was playing-

"Liz is such a pretty woman, of course her son would look like he walked off a runway," she cut me off again, and that time she said it with a wink. I fought back the puke that was threatening to come up, that had nothing to do with my head. I visibly shuddered.

When she finally let me explain, she told me she would get me in as fast as possible. I thanked her and made my way to a seat in the corner of the room as far away from everyone else as possible. I just wanted to get out of there.

After about an hour, the two little kids had gone back, and then I was called. I answered all of the doctor's questions. All he did was shove a bright light in my fucking face. After all of that, he finally cleared me and gave me a note for the coach.

I was walking out, pissed, and mumbling that I knew I was fucking fine and had no goddamn concussion. What a waste of time. I went through the main lobby of the hospital, just about to call my mom to come and get me to take me to my car, when I saw someone. It was someone I was hoping to see again, but hadn't thought I would.


	6. Chapter 6 Joyride

_**When your hopes and dreams**_

_**Lose the will to go**_

_**Joyride**_

_**Reaching for the light**_

_**Knowing we can't win**_

_**There's something in the distance**_

_**A glorious existence**_

_**A simple celebration**_

_**A place you've never been before**_

_**Tell me that you wanna go**_

_**-The Killers**_

**BPOV**

"Go home, I'll be fine." Charlie was insisting that I leave him there again while he received his chemo.

As usual, I ignored him. The chemo he was on had to be administered slowly, so it usually took about four hours to complete.

Things were about the same as they had been. He was still sick, but it didn't seem to be getting worse. Mom was working a lot, so, most nights, I was with my dad at Forks Hospital. I finally told them about my truck, so I had been using one of their cars to take Dad to and from the hospital.

I sat in his room a little longer, when he finally started to dose off - that's what he usually did when he was here. I wouldn't leave, though, in case he ever needed anything.

Usually, to make him happy, I would say I was leaving to go do something, but in reality, I would just go down to the main lobby. They had a couple of really nice couches down there. I would curl up on one and read or do homework. Anything to pass the time. Alice would come by sometimes, but it was super boring, and I couldn't blame her for not wanting to live there, too.

I stood quietly, putting a blanket over Charlie, and stepped out of the room. The outpatient facilities were nice there; everyone had their own space. They weren't like normal hospital rooms. The room had a reclining type chair, a TV, and of course the machines for the medications. Everything in that wing was a little brighter than the rest of the hospital; I think it was supposed to encourage positive moods or something like that. The nurses there were so nice, and by that point we were all on a first name basis.

Charlotte was the nurse on duty that night. She was especially nice. She was a very pretty lady, probably in her thirties, with wavy, shoulder-length brown hair, and tan skin. Charlotte was always smiling. She was a bright and happy woman. She always wore hot pink scrubs, which matched her personality perfectly. We spent a lot of time talking about my school and friends, and her family. She had a husband, Peter, and two little ones at home. She loved showing their most recent pictures. There had also been many times where she would bring cookies or brownies in for me to snack on.

Another nurse that Charlie had a lot was a guy named Jake. He was young and hadn't been out of school very long. I would guess that he is somewhere around twenty-four years old. Charlie liked to give him a hard time on the nights when he was feeling better. I liked the nights that Jake worked, because he would sneak his iPod in and let me listen to his new music. A couple of times, when Jakes boss went on lunch, we had gone on the staff computers and shopped for an engagement ring for his girlfriend, Leah. I hadn't met her, but Jake had shown me pictures, and she was gorgeous. Jake had no idea what a girl would like in a ring and picked out the most hideous ones. Let me just say, he should thank God that he had me help him pick one out, and that girl should thank me.

I was amazed at how nice most of the staff was. It was people like them who made all of this just a little more comfortable.

As I walked down the hall I ran into Charlotte.

"You going downstairs hun?" She asked with a smile.

"Yeah I have my cell, could-"

"I know, I know. I will call you if he wakes up; otherwise you will be back twenty minutes before he has finished tonight's treatment. Well, sweetheart, you still have about three and a half hours to kill until then." She said with a wink. She was used to my routine by then; she knew I wanted to be there if Charlie was awake.

"Thanks Charlotte," I said as I headed to the elevators.

When I made it to the lobby, I was pleased to find my favorite couch empty. It was a large plushy, plum colored couch wide enough for me to sit comfortably and spread my books out on. The room had a relaxing feel to it; it had a fountain that made for nice background noise. All of the furnishings in the room consisted of a dark wood, and the lights weren't as harsh as the blinding fluorescents throughout the rest of the hospital. It almost felt like a hotel lobby, but the second you heard a page for a doctor spread through the sound system, you remembered where you were.

I sat down, made myself comfortable, and pulled the books out from my backpack. I zipped up my hoodie and pulled my sleeves a little lower. One thing I had learned quickly in my time there is that they kept the place freaking cold. I had no idea why, but it was always cold there, and I learned to forgo fashion for comfort, and warmth. So, I was wearing my comfy sweats and old hoodie, so I could go straight to bed when I got home. Alice would have died if she'd seen me but, c'mon I was in a hospital, it was late, and dead quiet. It wasn't like I was trying to impress anyone.

I was about fifteen minutes into my studying when I felt someone standing behind me. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up on end. I turned around and was beyond stunned when I saw Edward Masen. It was probably only a couple seconds, but it felt like ten minutes that we just stared at each other. I wasn't sure what to do. The last time I had seen that boy he was flipping out on my best friend. I felt like I should have been scared, but I wasn't. Not at all. If anything, I felt oddly calm. He was just wearing jeans and a Forks football sweatshirt. His hair was a mess - going every direction - and he looked a little tired. Even so, he still looked better than any guy I had ever seen.

"Um, hi. Bella, right?" He broke the silence as he walked around the couch toward me.

"Yeah, you're Emmett's brother, Edward." Wow, Bella way to state the obvious, God.

"Yeah, I am. So, what? You just come here to hang out on your free time?" he asked, with a little smirk.

"Um, no. I'm here with my dad; he's upstairs getting chemo." A look of shock crossed his features. I felt bad when I realized that he didn't know already. Emmett was my best friend, and he didn't even tell his family what was going on?

"Wait, has Emmett not told you? I figured everyone knew by now." I offered lamely.

"No." He paused, looking like he was trying to find the right words to say.

"I'm sorry, Em and I really don't talk much, well, at all, if we can help it," he said, with a little bit of a nervous laugh.

"Do you mind if I sit for a second?" he asked. Did I mind? Hell no.

"No, of course not." I moved all of my crap out of the way and motioned for him to sit down. After a bit of an awkward silence, he began to speak.

"So, I just saw you sitting here and wanted to say that I was sorry for how I acted in front of you and your friend at your school a while back. I'm not usually like that, and I didn't mean to scare you, if I did."

I was shocked, to say the least. After the performance he put on at school, I never expected such a gentlemanly apology from him.

"Edward, you really don't need to apologize to me. Whatever happened was between you and Em." A look of genuine relief flashed across his face. I wasn't gonna hold something against him I had nothing to do with.

"Thanks, Bella."

I wasn't sure what to say, so I gave him the most genuine smile I could. I wasn't going to try to flirt; I would just end up making a fool of myself. Then I started thinking and was instantly mortified. The most handsome guy I had ever seen in my life was talking to me, and I was basically wearing my pajamas. Fuck, kill me now. I was never that worried about my appearance, but I had never felt like this about someone so fast before. I started pulling on my sleeves nervously, very self-conscious at that point.

"So what brings you here tonight?" Oh. My. God. Tell me I didn't just say that, can I get anymore lame. As I was berating myself, I looked up at Edward, and was rewarded with the most beautiful smile I had ever seen.

"Uh, I hit my head during football today and my coach overreacted and thought I may have a concussion. I don't, but that's what brought me to this fine establishment." He said sarcastically, obviously still annoyed by the fact that he was forced to go there. Even though had I just met him, I could tell he wasn't someone that liked being told what to do.

"Well, sorry you had to come here, but I'm glad you're okay." I am so so so glad that you are here. Thank God I was smart enough not to add that out loud.

"I'm not sorry, well, not anymore," he said quietly looking down, I was sure I was blushing fire red. "Um, so you go to Forks Private?" I nodded yes. "Do you like it there?"

"Yeah, I do. Its small but, I dunno, I guess I'm just used to it," I said with a shrug. "So do you like your school?" I asked trying to keep the conversation flowing.

"I guess. I dunno, it's all the same to me. I go there for football, so it serves its purpose," he said.

We ended up sitting and talking for the next hour and a half. I was amazed at how funny he was. We talked about everything from school, to books, to music. I was happy to see how much we had in common. He didn't seem anything like Em had described, however, I knew Em knew him a lot better than I did.

"Crap, I gotta go," he said, when he looked at his watch. He jumped up, obviously surprised at how long we had been talking.

"Did you park out front? I could walk with you; I wouldn't mind some fresh air." I offered.

He hesitated for a minute and then let me know that he was dropped off by a teammate and that his car was still at school.

"The school isn't too far away, I could drive you to it if you want," I said quietly. I really didn't want to push my company on him if he didn't want it.

"Thanks. That would be great." I was expecting for him to reject my offer, so when he didn't I was sure the grin on my face was a goofy one.

"Okay... just give me a minute to run up and check on my Dad and let his nurse know that I'll be right back," I said, as I shoved my stuff back in my bag.

"I'll be right here," he replied.

I walked to the elevator, feeling even more embarrassed knowing that he was getting a full view of my lounging attire. I stood patiently waiting for the elevator to come down and the doors to open. I stepped in and pushed the button for the right floor. As soon as the doors closed, I proceeded to do a happy dance. I was so glad to be talking to this boy I had quickly developed a crush on. I couldn't wait to tell Alice and Em about him. Shit, Emmett! I hoped he wouldn't care about my talking to Edward. I mean, I understand that they didn't get a long very well, but Edward had been nothing but a gentlemen toward me.

When the doors to the elevator opened, I jumped out and headed toward Charlie's room. I peeked my head in the door and saw that he was still sound asleep, even snoring a little. I walked out and went to the nurse's station to let Charlotte know I was gonna be gone ten minutes and to call me if he woke up.

"Hey hun. You get bored down there?" Charlotte asked, when I walked up.

"Actually, I ran into a friend downstairs." A friend, could I consider Edward a friend?

"He needs a ride to his car, so I am gonna take him. It should only be like ten minutes, but call me if you need me."

"A boy, huh?" She asked with a playful wink.

"Yeah, a boy," I said, rolling my eyes, but I was sure that I was blushing really bad.

"No problem, take your time. He still has at least another two hours to go, so no need to rush back. He'll be just fine while you take your friend home."

"Thanks Charlotte." I ignored the insinuation she put on the word friend.

As I walked back down the hall, I looked into Charlie's room one more time, and he was still out, so I made my way back to the elevators. I was worried about leaving him there, but I knew I would only be ten minutes. There was no point in lying to myself; I was really excited about spending a little more time with Edward.

I made it to the lobby level and stepped off of the elevator to see Edward waiting just where I had left him. I was half expecting him to come to his senses and bolt as soon as I was out of sight. He smiled when he saw me walking out of the elevator and toward him.

"Ready?" I asked, once I was close enough for him to hear.

"Are you sure you don't mind? If you need to stay, it's okay. I can call a ride," he offered. I panicked a little inside. Did he not want me to take him anymore? Or was he just being polite?

"It's really no big deal. I'm pretty bored here. I don't mind taking you at all," I said, praying that he hadn't changed his mind.

"If you're sure…" I nodded. "Okay, well, thanks, then."

We then walked out of the lobby. It was pitch black outside and misting lightly. It was a cold night and the breeze sent a chill through me and gave me goosebumps on my arms. We walked over to my dad's truck. It was dark blue and fairly new. It drove so much better than my old truck. I unlocked the doors, and we jumped in. I started the truck and turned the heater on. We sat there for a minute, waiting for the truck to heat up. It was a little awkward; I wasn't sure what to say. He felt so close in the confines of the truck. His long legs took up a lot of space inside of the cab, and he smelled so good. I pulled out of the spot and made my way to the main road. Forks Public was close, so I pulled into the parking lot in no time.

"Right there," he said, pointing to the lone car in the parking lot. It was the same silver Volvo I had seen him driving before. It was cute - a little older, but still nice looking.

"Well, thanks for the ride," he said, as he sat there next to me.

He suddenly looked very nervous. He took his seatbelt off and reached for the door handle, but then stopped. He looked over to me and started to speak.

"Uh, so next," He stopped what he was saying and reach for the handle again; he then stopped and ran his fingers through his messy hair.

I just waited, not sure what he was going to say, or if he was even going to say it.

"Okay, um... so next Saturday there's some kinda spring dance or something here." He waved his hand out dismissively. "And even though it will probably be really lame and all, um... I was just wondering if that, well if it would ever be something that you might want to come to?"

He was mumbling and looking at the floor of the truck as he nervously ran his hands through his hair again. I think he asked me to a dance, but I wasn't totally sure. When I didn't answer right away, he sighed and grabbed the door handle once again, this time actually opening the door.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have asked. Thanks for the ride, anyway."

"Wait!" I said, a lot louder than I meant to.

"Um, if you're asking, I would love to go to the dance with you. Just to warn you, though, I can't dance… like, at all." I said with a nervous laugh.

He sat all the way back down and shut the door.

"Really?" he asked somewhat surprised.

"Really that I will go, or really that I can't dance?" I asked confused as to what had surprised him.

He laughed and I think it was the best sound I had ever heard. "Well, to both I guess. I mean, when Em said you thought I was the 'biggest asshole you had ever seen,' I really didn't think I would have a chance with you," he said.

Wait, what? I never said that to Emmett, why would he say that? I had to make sure Edward knew I didn't see him that way.

"Edward, I don't know what you're talking about. I've never said that about you. I'm not gonna lie, you did freak me out a little that day, but I never said anything like that to Emmett." A look of relief crossed his face.

"I'll have to ask Em why he would say something like that." I was kinda pissed. Why would Emmett put words into my mouth like that?

"No, don't." Edward almost shouted in the cab of the truck. I looked over at him, surprised by his outburst.

"I mean, if you don't mind, I really would rather... um... Emmett not know that we are going together."

What? Why would he want to hide that? I just looked at him kinda confused and he must have caught on because he added.

"I mean... God." He paused and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"I'm not trying to hide you or anything, I just know that Em isn't gonna be cool with it and I would rather not cause trouble if I can avoid it," he spit out real fast.

Why would Em not be okay with it? I understood that they didn't get a long but Emmett was not my dad or my boyfriend, so really, it shouldn't have mattered to him.

"Okay," I agreed anyway, because I wasn't really sure what else to say at that point, I was still shocked and mad that Em would lie about something that I said, and at that point I felt that I didn't owe him any explanation. I really didn't wanna cause a problem with one of my best friends, but I really liked Edward and wanted to give him a chance.

Even though I was really enjoying being with Edward, I wanted to get back to the hospital to be with Charlie. I was worried about Charlie's reaction. Was he going to be ok with Edward? I thought about it for a second, but I figured I would deal with that later. I gave Edward my number and he said he would call me with more details about the dance. He also said he would let me know when he would pick me up and whatnot. After that, he gave me one last breathtaking smile and got into his own car. I backed out and started to drive away, giving him one last wave. I made my way back to the hospital, dying to call Alice and tell her everything.

**EPOV**

I got in my car and waved to her as she drove off. Once she was out of sight I let my head fall to the steering wheal. What the fuck did I just do? I invited her to a fucking dance, I didn't dance, I'd never even been to one before. I just didn't know what to do. I knew I wanted to see her again and that was the first excuse that came into my head, so I asked her. I thought for sure she would say no, but she shocked the hell out of me when, not only did she say yes, but she seemed genuinely excited about it.

This was all new for me; I had never tried to hang out with people because it wasn't worth the hassle of dealing with my parents. I didn't know why, but I was willing to go through it to spend time with her.

I was shocked when she said yes, but I was even more shocked when I learned that Emmett completely lied to me about what she had said. Fucking prick. She didn't seem too happy about it either. I felt like such an ass when I was begging her not to tell Em about the dance. I just knew that he would throw a bitch fit and probably try to get me into trouble or something, so that I wouldn't be able to go with her, because he was a bitch like that. I knew I'd have to tell Mom about the dance so she wouldn't give me crap about going, but I was going to do everything I could to keep who I was going with a secret.

I thought over our time at the hospital. I was surprised that I saw her there and took a minute to decide if I was going to approach her or not. She looked so pretty sitting there. She was sitting on a huge purple couch with books and papers all around her. Her hair was down and she was wearing comfortable clothes. It was a nice change to see a girl not so uptight about their looks. When I said, 'hi' to her, she actually seemed happy to see me. I didn't know what I was expecting.

I felt like such a jerk, making a joke about her hanging out there in her free time. I mean, of course I had heard about our Police Chief having cancer, but I had no idea that was her dad. When she said that, it all fell into place; I remembered Mom saying something on the phone about one of Em's friend's dad being sick, but I didn't put two and two together until just then that that friend, was Bella. I felt terrible for anyone in her family's situation, but I really didn't want her to have to deal with something like that. I couldn't imagine the pain she must have been feeling. Did she spend every night there at the hospital? I didn't like the idea of her being by herself there all the time, I didn't know why, but I felt protective over her.

She was so nice to me. I wasn't expecting that from what Em had told me she had thought of me. We ended up talking forever about everything. We had a ton in common and she had awesome taste in music. She was so easy to talk to, not like other girls at school who tried so hard to flirt all the time. She was really genuine and she made me want to open up to her. It scared me a little; I'd never felt that way before.

After sitting there for a minute, I started my car and headed home. On the way home, I had to think of a story of why it took so long and how I got to my car. I figured that being honest was the best way to go, so I would tell Mom everything, except that the 'friend' I ran into was Bella.

When I pulled into the drive, I noticed that Em's car and Mom's were both outside. I parked and walked up the steps, heading inside.

"Edward is that you?" I heard Mom yelling from the kitchen.

"Yeah." I shouted back, making my way there.

She came out of the kitchen wiping her hands on a towel.

"How did you get home? Why didn't you call?" She looked at her watch. "Wait, it's after eight, what took so long?"

I let her finish her twenty-one questions before I attempted to answer.

"Sorry, I should have called; it took forever to get into see the doctor." Okay, so that wasn't completely true but... eh.

"After I got out, I ran into a friend who was there with uh… family." I didn't want to give away too much information so that she couldn't figure out that it was Bella.

"My friend was leaving, so I got a lift to my car." I was careful not to say "she" or "her" cause that would result in a million more questions.

"Oh, okay." I could tell she wasn't sure what to say because I never hung out with anyone. It was no big deal but I knew she wouldn't let it go.

"Well, Edward, I hope you know how irresponsible it was to do all that and not call. I'm not happy," she said, giving me her 'no bullshit' look. She didn't even notice I had been gone long. If she was really worried, she would've called my cell. She was the type of person that had to assert her authority every fucking second that she could, so she could prove she was in control.

"Sorry, won't happen again." I figured just giving in would be the best way to get that over with. I started to walk away, to head to my room, but I stopped and turned to add,

"Oh, and not that you care, but I'm fine; no concussion." I left the room before I could hear her response; frankly I didn't give a shit.

I got to my room and shut the door, not caring that I hadn't eaten. I would wait until she went to bed and then go make something. I pulled my shoes off and put on some music. I lay on my bed thinking about the evening's events; still a little in shock at how it all turned out. At that point, I was very happy about the school's policy for head injuries, 'cause I wasn't sure if I would have gotten to talk to Bella otherwise. As I was lying there, I heard a knock on my door.

"It's unlocked." I assumed it was my Mom to lecture some more but was surprised to see Em walk through the door.

"Never mind, get the fuck out." He was the last person I wanted to see.

"Shit, Edward, I just wanted to borrow a CD." He looked surprised by my hostility; usually he had to provoke me to get that treatment.

He had provoked me, he just didn't know it. I was pissed that he lied about Bella and even though I couldn't tell him, I was gonna show him. Immature? Maybe, but it made me feel a hell of a lot better.

"Not a fucking chance, get the hell out." I said very calmly staring at the ceiling.

He knew not to push me when I was pissed like that, so very wisely he chose to leave the room without saying anything else.

I wasn't gonna let him or my mom make me feel bad, I was on a high about the upcoming date I had with Bella. I looked at her number in my phone and was tempted to call her to hear her voice before I went to bed, but didn't I didn't want to look clingy. Then I thought about her going back to the hospital by herself in the dark and felt a surge of panic. I didn't like the idea of her being in that dark parking lot alone. So I flipped to her number again and just texted her to make sure she made it back ok.

Hey Bella, just wanted to make sure you made it back safe. Thanks again for the ride.

I hit send and waited, hoping she would respond. About five minutes later, my phone buzzed alerting me to a text message.

Safe and sound. This is Forks, you know ;) No problem on the ride, it was nice to have someone to hang out with tonight. Goodnight Edward

It was fucking girlie and lame how happy I was to receive a text from her. I knew I would have to tell my Mom about the dance soon, in order to make everything go as smoothly as possible, but I wasn't worrying about that right then. After getting something to eat, and doing some homework, I went to bed. I fell asleep that night, happier than I had been in a long time.


	7. Chapter 7 Romeo and Juliet

_**Come up on different streets, they both were streets of shame**_

_**Both dirty, both mean, yes and the dream was just the same**_

_**And I dream your dream for you and now your dream is real**_

_**-The Killers**_

**BPOV**

"So, you're really gonna go with him?" Alice asked again.

We had just gotten to my house after school, and were in my room sharing a bowl of popcorn. I had just finished telling her everything that happened the night before.

"Well, I told him yes. I mean, why wouldn't I?" I said, popping another piece in my mouth.

I was confused, Alice was always bugging me to date and stuff, and now that I had one, she was acting less than excited about it.

"I dunno," she said, shrugging.

She looked like she was trying to choose her words carefully. She sat with her legs crossed in front of her, on my bed, with her elbows on her knees. She was daintily putting kernels in her mouth one at a time.

"I mean, I have only seen him once, and really Bella, he acted like a jerk, you know."

She looked at me, hoping that I would understand, and that I wouldn't be upset with her for bringing it up. I understood where she was coming from. I knew what she meant, because did Edward make a good first impression? That was a big no. However, I had spent a lot of time with him the other night and he was nothing like that - he seemed like a really good guy.

"I know. I thought so too but, Alice, I really think he had just been having a bad day. I mean, that's not an excuse, but he seemed to feel bad about it because the first thing he did was apologize for it." I really wanted Alice to be happy for me, she was my best friend and her opinion meant a lot.

"I understand that, everyone can have a bad first impression, I guess. I'm not gonna lie... he is gorgeous, and it sounds like you guys had a really nice talk last night." I thought she was coming around, but then she threw the question at me that I had been waiting for her to ask. "I guess I'm just not so sure about it, I mean what about all the stuff Emmett says about him? Doesn't that bother you?" I had been asking myself that very same question since the night before.

"Yeah, I guess it does a little. I've thought about it a lot since last night. If you think about it, anything bad Em ever says is something that Edward has done to him. He doesn't talk like Edward is dangerous or anything, they just don't get along. I dunno, I mean I really wanna believe Em, but when I found out that he lied to Edward about what I said about him, it kinda made me question what he has said to us."

Alice was pissed about that too, we were both surprised that Emmett would put words in my mouth just to hurt Edward.

I loved Emmett, and he was one of my best friends, but it really seemed that he tried to make Edward sound really bad, and I really didn't know why he would do that. Did I think that they had a good relationship? No, absolutely not, and I did believe that Edward treated Emmett badly, I had seen it for myself. I didn't think that Em was as innocent as he made himself sound, though. I really didn't know what to think. It just didn't seem like Edward would be that angry towards someone without being provoked.

"I'm not trying to marry him or anything though, Alice, it's one date - one dance - that's it. I may never see him after that."

As I was saying those words, I was saying a silent prayer that it wouldn't be true. I knew I wanted to see Edward again, I just hoped that he would want to see me, too.

"Well, I'm really happy for you, Bella," She said, with a sincere smile.

"Thank you Alice, it means a lot to me." I gave her a hug.

"Damn, though, I'm really jealous. I wish our schools had dances… and I want a new boy," she said with a pout.

"I know. This would be perfect for you, I'm not really that excited about the dance part of it. I'll probably make an ass out of myself and he'll never call again, so really there is nothing to worry about with Em."

I said it as a joke, but it was actually a fear of mine. I had never been to a dance before and I hadn't really been on a date, either. I had been out with groups before, but never on a real one-on-one date. I was nervous about how it was gonna go.

"Okay, so it's Tuesday, and the dance is this Saturday?" Alice asked, looking horrified all of a sudden.

"Yes," I said carefully, drawing out the word; her expression was a little scary.

She quickly pushed the popcorn bowl out of the way, almost taking my hand with it since I was trying to grab a handful.

"Oh my God Bella! What are you going to wear?"

I froze. Shit! I hadn't even though about that. I had nothing to wear, but I was sure Alice did and she would let me borrow something of hers, but she was much smaller, and I didn't think anything would fit.

"I don't know, I didn't even think about it. What am I gonna do?" I asked, now feeling even more panicked about the date.

"Well, your mom is home tonight, so she'll go with your dad, right?" I nodded. "We need to go to Port Angeles and pray that they have something left." Leave it to Alice, she always had a plan, and I knew she would know where to go once we got there. I didn't mind shopping, but Alice… well, Alice loved it. Whatever was needed, for any occasion, she would know exactly where to go to get the perfect item.

It was already three in the afternoon, and Port Angeles was about an hour away so we needed to head out.

"Perfect. Yeah, we could go tonight, there is just one problem," I said, looking at her.

"Charlie," she said stating a fact; she knew that my Dad could be irrationally overprotective. With him not feeling well, I hated asking him something like this, but I would never do anything behind his back. When I told Alice how I felt about it, she let me know that she already had a plan.

"Ok this is what you need to do: I'll go down with you, and put a good word in for Edward - him being a good guy and all that." I was about to interrupt her to remind her that she didn't even know him, but she put her hand up to stop me. "If you want this to work, your Dad is going to want more than just your word."

I hated lying in anyway to Charlie, but I knew Alice was right.

"Okay, fine, but what if he still says no?" I wasn't so sure that Alice's plan was going to work.

"He won't," was all she said as she jumped off the bed and headed down stairs. I scrambled off the bed to follow her. I didn't realize that she meant right then. I was not ready to face them right that second.

Mom and Dad were sitting in the living room by the television; Dad had some game on, and Mom was reading a book. They looked like they where trying to relax; they didn't have to leave for his treatment for about two hours.

"Hey, what you guys watchin'?" Alice asked, as she plopped down on the sofa next to my mom.

"What do you think, Alice?" Mom asked, playfully rolling her eyes.

If Charlie was in the room, it was sports, so there was really no reason to ask. I was standing outside of the room, trying to decide what the best way to bring this up would be when I heard my Dad's voice coming from the front room.

"Why are you standing in the doorway Bells?" Shit.

"Uh, sorry. So, what are ya watching?" When I said this, all three of them turned around to look at me. Mom and Alice on the couch, and Dad in his recliner. Mom and Dad both looked at me suspiciously, and Alice rolled her eyes giving me the "you idiot I just asked that" look.

Dad picked up the remote and muted the TV, sitting his chair forward and putting the leg rest down. He looked pointedly at Alice, and then at me.

"Okay, you two, what's up?"

I looked at Alice in sheer panic. I had already fucked it up before it even happened. Alice, completely unfazed, just rolled her eyes and took over.

"It's really great, actually!" She was turning on the charm.

"Emmett's brother, Edward - I don't think you've met him - but he is such a gentlemen. He's a junior and plays football for Forks High," She said in Charlie's direction, and then she turned to Renee, "He is super cute and so sweet." She was laying it on thick, trying to appeal to each of them, but there was one problem; they were smarter than that. Even though they saw through what she was doing, they both had amused looks on their faces from her performance. She was about to continue, when Charlie cut her off.

"Well, Alice, sounds like he has a great resume, but I'm not currently hiring, I'll keep the info in the file though, was that all?" Charlie asked knowingly, with a smirk.

"Um, no. Not quite, I just wanted to give some background, 'cause this awesome guy asked Bella to the dance at Forks High this Saturday!"

The room went dead silent. Charlie's head snapped to look at me; I was still hiding behind the couch.

After what seemed like an eternity of silence, I heard Alice meekly add, "Isn't that great?" with a cheesy smile plastered on her face.

Charlie turned his attention back to Alice and gave her a look that said "what do you think."

"Well, Bella, your lawyer slash publicist has done a wonderful job, but would you like to fill us in a little?"

Damn Alice, I knew she was putting too much of an act on. The straightforward approach was always better with Charlie; he respected when people were just honest with him. So that's what I did. I sat down on the couch with Mom and Alice, and told him about the night before at the hospital. I chose to leave out our first encounter.

After I was done pleading my case, Dad and Mom sat there for a second looking at each other.

"Well, Charlie, she's sixteen and he sounds like a nice boy. I have no problem with it."

Yes! Mom's was board. One down one to go. Dad let out a big sigh, sat back in his chair and ran one hand over his face.

"What time would you go, and where?" He looked at me for a second, and when I did not answer, he asked, "What are the details, Bella?"

Shit, I should have waited for Edward to call; I still didn't know any of this.

"Um, he's going to call today to let me know all of that," I said, praying that not knowing any info wouldn't hurt my chances of going.

"This is Emmett's brother?" he asked. I nodded. He chuckled a little, and asked, "And Emmett is happy about it?"

"Why wouldn't he be? He doesn't know but..." I trailed off.

Dad just laughed under his breath a little, and shook his head. I just shrugged, and let it go.

"Here's the deal. Your Mom's right, you're sixteen. We trust you, and I'm fine with you going." At this, Alice and I started doing the anticipatory bouncing dance on the couch, waiting for the final 'yes'.

"But," Charlie said, in a loud speaking voice.

But? What does he mean "but"? We both stopped our bouncing immediately. "Buts" where never good. I looked at him and he added, "I want to know the details, and I want to meet this Edwin first. IF all of that checks out, your mother and I don't mind if you go." The squeals between Alice and I erupted. I couldn't believe they said 'yes'. That was so easy! I ignored that he called him Edwin, and just hoped he wouldn't do that when he met him. Even though I was nervous for Edward to meet them, I thought that their conditions were fair.

"Well girls, you better stop celebrating, and get dress shopping." Mom said, laughing. I jumped up, giving them both a hug, and then Alice and I grabbed our stuff and headed out to go shopping.

We pulled into Port Angeles, about an hour later, and started shopping immediately, knowing we were low on time. We had no luck in the first two stores, but the third store we went into seemed great. It was a very small little boutique, with the walls decorated in polka dots. The store was bright and fun. There were little mini crystal chandlers hanging from the ceiling and mannequins with funky outfits on. They had some awesome vintage style clothes, and some pretty classics as well.

I saw a dress hanging on one of the racks in the back. It was a cream colored with blue and cream lace. It was strapless and had a beautiful dark blue satin wrap around the waist. Right when I saw it, I loved it. I didn't need to look anywhere else. Alice agreed, so I tired it on and it fit perfectly. We found a pair of simple matching blue heels to go with it. They where a reasonable height, so I wouldn't kill myself in them. As the lady in the store was bagging the dress for me, my cell phone rang, and the screen said it was Edward. I stepped away from Alice to answer, so she wouldn't try to talk to him by yelling in my direction.

"Hello."

"Hey Bella, it's Edward." Just the sound of his voice made me happy.

"Hi, how are you?"

"I'm good, what are you up to?"

"My friend, Alice, and I are just in Port Angeles shopping. I think you saw her at my school, she was there with me."

"Oh yeah, I think I remember her. She was the little one, right?"

"Um, yeah." I would make sure not to let Alice know that he said that; she hated when people identified her with her height.

"Okay, this is kinda weird, and just say no if you don't want to, alright?"

"Okay," I said hesitantly. I was a little worried about what he would ask.

"So, I have this friend, his name is Jasper, and his... um, well, date didn't work out for the dance, so he begged me to ask if any of your friends would wanna go. If not, though, it's fine, he can deal."

This was perfect! I knew Alice would love to go; in fact she had been trying dresses on with me all night for fun, and she already had a favorite.

"Um no, that's great! I bet Alice would want to go. Give me all the information, and I'll text you if she wants to go." I said this knowing she would be so happy to go.

"Awesome." After that, he gave me all the information - letting me know that if Alice agreed, they would pick us up at six for dinner, and then the four of us could go to the dance. Just as we were about to hang up, I remembered Charlie's stipulations for my going.

"Oh Edward, one more thing… um, if it's ok, my dad would like to meet you before we go." I hoped that that would not send him running.

"That's fine, I'll just meet him when I pick you up," he said it as if it was no big deal. I just hoped that Charlie liked him.

"Okay. Awesome, I will text you tonight then."

"Bye Bella. Have a good night,"

"You too, bye."

I didn't want to hang up with him, I had just seen him the night before, but I still wanted to talk more. I turned around to go find Alice, but she was standing right there behind me, bouncing in place.

"You were listening, weren't you?" I asked laughing.

"Maaaybe... was there something you wanted to ask me?" she asked with a big goofy grin, fluttering her lashes.

"No. There's no point; I know you will say yes, so I will just say to be ready by six on Saturday, because Edward and his friend Jasper will be picking us up for the dance."

"Yes, yes, yes, yes!" she chanted, bouncing in a circle. I just stood there and laughed at her.

"Well, we better hurry so we can go back to get that dress that you saw."

"Oh shit! Yeah, what time is it?" She looked at her watch, answering her own question, and then proceeded to drag me to the counter so we could pay and go back to the other store.

The dress that she fell in love with looked cute on her. It was a black strapless mini, all in sparkles, with a flat black overlay that went to the ground, but was open in the front. It matched her personality perfectly. She found a pair of super high, black sparkly shoes at the store where my dress was, so she bought those and we headed out.

After both of our dresses were safely stowed in Alice's back seat, we headed back to Forks. Alice was bugging me to get more details on Jasper from Edward. I told her she was just going to have to wait. As we talked more about the dance, I realized Dad would be getting his treatment during the time that the boys would be picking us up. Alice and I both agreed that Mom and Dad would be heartbroken if they didn't get to see us before our first dance. Well, that, and the fact that Dad wanted to grill the shit out of Edward. After talking about it, Alice and I agreed we should just have the boys pick us up at the hospital and surprise Mom and Dad so they could see us before we went. Yes, it would be embarrassing for us, but it would mean a lot to them.

I decided to call Edward, instead of texting him, since there was a lot to say about the location change. I wanted to wait until Alice dropped me off, though, in order to avoid her demanding information about Edwards's friend. When we made it back to my house, Mom and Dad were back. Dad had gone to bed, but Mom was still up. She came up to my room with us, and excitedly helped us pick out makeup and accessories to match our dresses.

I could tell Mom was excited to have this experience with us. When Mom and Alice were going through accessories for Alice's dress, I snuck out and called Edward, letting him know what our idea was. He agreed that it would be really nice, and he thought that my mom and dad should get to see us as well. It made me like him even more. However, he did suggest that Jasper should probably not come to meet my parents, and that he could just meet us at dinner. I thought it was kind of weird, but just let it go. It wasn't like Dale would care what Alice was doing anyway, I doubted she will even tell him.

After we had everything organized, it was past midnight, so Alice decided to stay at my house. We fell asleep fast, being exhausted from our day of shopping, and excited for our upcoming weekend.

**EPOV**

I needed to call Bella and give her all the details for the dance; I really wanted to take her out to dinner too. I needed to make sure that I talked to my mom first thing after school. I didn't want to call Bella and then have to cancel if my mom was in one of her evil moods and said no.

I was thinking about all of this on the way to my last class of the day - art. I had that class with Jasper. The teacher was a hippy and was laid back. She pretty much just let everybody talk and hang out. I walked in to see Jasper already sitting at our table, with his headphones on and looking like he was pretty zoned out. I walked over and set my stuff down beside him. When I sat down, I bumped the table and his head snapped over to me. He smiled and pulled his headphones off.

"Hey man, what's up?" he asked as he started pulling shit out of his bag.

"Not much, you?"

"Same old, same old. My mom's out of town this weekend, so I wanted to have a big party at my house, but everybody's gonna be at the dance and shit. What a waste of a 'rent free weekend," he said, shaking his head.

Jasper lived with just his sister and his mom. I had never heard him talk about his dad. I was pretty sure he wasn't in the picture.

"So, whatd'ya say… wanna hang out Saturday?" he asked.

"Um, actually, I'm going to the dance after all," I said quietly, not wanting to make a big deal about it.

"No fucking way! Edward fucking Mason is not only going to do something, but he's actually gonna do it with… with a female?" he said, shaking his head in feigned disbelief.

"Wait, you are taking a chick, right?" he asked, completely serious.

"Of course, I'm going with a girl," I replied, rolling my eyes.

"No fucking way! Who? You're not gonna take that skank, Kate, are you?"

"Kate? No way! Why the hell would I take her?" I said, surprised he would even think that.

He just shrugged his shoulders. I forgot Jazz picked his date by who would give it up the easiest.

"No, I'm taking this girl from Forks Private. Her name is Bella." I didn't want to give him too much information. Even though he was my friend, I didn't want him thinking about Bella the way he does about other girls.

"Bella, Bella, Be-lll-laa" He said slowly, testing out her name. "I dunno, Ed… doesn't sound like she will give it up very easy. Sounds snooty or some shit. Your gonna have to work for that pussy."

Fuck, I didn't even like him talking about her that way. I just let it roll off, though, because there was no point in trying to change him.

"Forks Private, huh?" he continued. "They have a lot of hot chicks there. Dude, you should totally hook me up! See if she has a hot lonely friend, then we could all go together."

It was like a fucking light bulb went off in his head. He went from analyzing the fuckablity of names to snapping his head up with his amazing idea of trying to talk me into getting him a date.

"Eh, I dunno." I really didn't want to have a problem with Bella because Jasper had hurt one of her friends.

"C'mon man, what the fuck are friends for?" I had to laugh, he had gotten himself in such a bad spot with all the games he played with girls, and I really didn't want him dragging that into my possible relationship. He kept bugging me about it, so I finally just gave in.

"Fuck. Okay, I'll ask her, but I'm fucking serious Jasper, you can't try to sleep with her friend or some shit like that."

He looked at me like I just spoke to him in German or something.

"Not try to sleep with her? Why the fuck would I not do that?" he asked, shocked, as if I had told him not to breathe the whole night.

"Because, asshole," I said laughing, "You're begging me to get you a date, because you fucked your way into this mess, and I actually like this girl, so if you screw over one of her friends it may not work out so well for me." I gave him way more information than I had planned to, but I wasn't sure how else to get him to understand. Jasper wasn't a bad guy; he just really didn't get it a lot of the time.

"Fuck, Edward. You gonna propose or some shit after the dance?" I just stopped the drawing I was working, on and gave him a shitty look.

"Okay, fine. I'll play nice gentlemen, alright?" he said, when he realized I was serious.

"Alright, I'll ask if she has a friend that wants to go."

"Sweet!" With that, our conversation was over. Jasper put his headphones back on, and zoned out again, while I focused on the "drawing" I was working on - it was more of a doodle than anything else.

**~*E&B*~**

After school and practice, I came home beat. Not really wanting to have the conversation I needed to have, I walked in the door and climbed the stairs to my room to put my shit away. I could hear Emmett's music coming from his room, so I figured that was the best time to talk to Mom - while he was not around.

I went back downstairs and found my Mom in her craft room. She had this room with shelves on every wall and every space was filled with some girly craft shit. I had no idea what she did in there, but she was in there all the time. I knocked on the door, that was partially open, to get her attention. She was sitting in her chair, facing away from me, but when she heard the knock, she turned to face me. It looked like she was sewing; she had pins and fabric in her hands and was holding more in between her lips. She smiled when she saw me and removed the pins from her mouth so she could speak.

"Hi, Edward, how was school?" she asked.

She seemed like she was in a good mood, and Dad was still out of town until next Monday, so I wouldn't even have to talk to him. Thank God. He wouldn't care less about the dance, but would find something else to bitch about to me.

"It was good. How was your day?" I figured I would try to be as nice as possible, so she would continue her good mood.

"Oh, it was fine, thanks for asking. Just trying to get this blanket done for your cousin, Ben's, new baby." I didn't know why she did that, we never even saw anyone from our family. Mom and Dad liked to have a pretty façade of the perfect family.

"That's nice of you; it looks good," I said, leaning over to take a peek at the bundle of pink fabric.

"So, did you need something?" she asked. There was only so much of my presence she could stand, I guess.

"Well, I just wanted to let you know that Saturday night I'm going to make a show at the school dance. A lot of guys from the team are going and stuff. I thought it might be fun."

If it had anything to do with football, they were usually more willing to be less shitty about it. She looked up from her project in shock; this was the first time I had ever made plans to do anything.

"Oh, really? I think that would be ok, but Edward… absolutely no drinking or drugs, and absolutely none of… you know what else."

You have got to be kidding me. I had never drunk or done drugs, and why the fuck did she think she needed to bring sex up?

"That won't be a problem," I said, just wanting to move forward with the conversation.

"Well, who are you going with? The boys from the team must have dates, right?"

This was what I was trying to avoid. I learned over the years it was always best to just be honest, but I'd have to find a way to not give this one away. I didn't want her to know I was going with Bella; it would just cause problems if Em found out.

"Um, my friend, Jasper, from school." She nodded for me to continue.

"Well, we're gonna go to dinner with our dates together and then meet everyone else at the dance. I'm going with... a friend of his date." Ha, that worked. He was going to be going with a friend of Bella's.

"Oh, alright. Well that sounds nice. You need to be home right after, understand?"

"Yeah, that's fine."

"I will call the school Edward, and find out when that is, so you can't lie to me about the time."

I had never lied to them about shit, and I had never been out late. She had no reason not to trust me and act so goddamn suspicious, but whatever. She was letting me go way easier than I thought she would, so I wasn't going to bitch.

"Okay, thanks. I'm gonna grab a sandwich and go do my homework." She just nodded and turned back to her project.

After I ate, I worked up the nerve to call Bella. I was still not so sure about having Jazz go with one of her friends, but I would just have to trust that he would keep his word to me.

After I hung up with her I felt good. All of the irritation I was feeling with my mom was gone, and she sounded genuinely happy to hear from me. After hanging up, I put some Kings of Leon on, and just sat in my bed and read. It had been a good night so far; I hadn't seen Emmett, Dad was out of town, and getting permission for the dance was not too painful. I took a hot shower, and as I was getting ready to go to sleep, I heard my phone ring from my nightstand. I was happy to see Bella's name on it when I picked it up.

She let me know that her friend, the elf - I learned her name was Alice - would go to the dance with Jasper. I also learned that her Dad wanted to meet me before we went. I'm not gonna lie and say I was cool with it; it scared the fuck out of me, but I tried to play it off like it was no big deal to her on the phone. We talked for a couple more minutes and agreed to meet at the hospital since that is where her dad would be; I thought it was really nice that she seemed so close with her family.

The last thing that I wanted was for Jasper to meet her folks. Fuck knows what he would say - he had no filter. She acted like it was a little odd when I suggested that he not be there, but thankfully she didn't ask any questions about it. After we hung up, I called Jasper and let him know. He was excited and asked me for details on Alice. I told him jokingly that, "I don't have any, so just fucking wait, and stop being a girl about it." That shut him up, and it was the end of our conversation. After all the planning was done, I turned my music up to drown out whatever shitty music Em was playing, and went to sleep excited about the upcoming weekend.


	8. Chapter 8 Unintended

_**You could be my unintended**_

_**Choice to live my life extended**_

_**You could be the one I'll always love**_

_**You could be the one who listens**_

_**To my deepest inquisitions**_

_**You could be the one I'll always love**_

_**I'll be there as soon as I can**_

_**But I'm busy mending broken**_

_**Pieces of the life I had before**_

_**- Muse**_

**BPOV**

The week had dragged by; Those last four days had seemed like a year. It was finally Saturday, and it was three o' clock. We were at Alice's getting ready. Alice and I needed to be at the hospital to meet Edward by six, and I didn't want to be late and make him face Charlie alone.

Charlie had been getting a little worse each day. His hair was very thin now and it wouldn't be long until it was gone completely. He was very sick and has been understandably more irritable as of late. Mom and I had tried very hard to be quiet around the house; he slept a lot and we didn't want to wake him. We had let Mom and Dad know of our plans of meeting Edward at the hospital, because even feeling this way, Dad still insisted on meeting Edward.

"Oh my God, perfect!" I looked in the mirror; Alice was just finishing my hair.

She was like a miracle worker, I was a frizz ball less than one hour before and she had transformed me so that I had large shiny curls. She had an amazing way to style my hair without making it look styled at all. Even though Alice was a fashionista, and liked more elaborate looks, she got me; she understood that I liked to look natural.

"Alice, I love it," I said, as I held a hand mirror looking at the full view of my hair.

I took a step back to look in a large mirror; ever since Edward asked me to go with him I couldn't help the feeling of inadequacy that had been growing in me.

Physically, Edward seemed flawless. He was the perfect height, broad shoulders, and he seemed to be in good shape. His facial features seemed to be just as perfect; he had the most beautiful green eyes I had ever seen, and his teeth were perfectly straight and white. I'm sure he could get any girl he wanted… why he asked me, I'll never know. I was sure Edward had been with many girls, and I couldn't help but feel that I didn't come close to measuring up to what he had had.

When I worked up the courage and turned to the mirror, I was pleasantly surprised at what I saw. My makeup was very natural but she had made me look like I was glowing. I didn't have my dress on yet, but even without it I felt beautiful. I just hoped Edward would think so too.

"OK, Chica, move it or lose it. I only have like two hours to get myself ready." Alice was all business.

I felt bad that I couldn't help her more, but when it came to this stuff she was the pro, and it was better to let her just work her magic.

"You want a glass of water?" I asked .

"Please."

I went downstairs to get us some water; I looked out the window and was happy to see it wasn't raining. I had hoped that the weather would hold out for us so we didn't get soaked in our dresses. I was headed back up to Alice's room when I noticed I had a text message from Emmett.

Bored stiff, wish you felt up to hanging out, call me tomorrow if you wanna catch a movie or something.

I ball of guilt grew inside of me; I hated that I had lied to Em, When he asked me if I wanted to hang out I told him that Charlie was not feeling well enough for me to have guests over - which was true. We had never hung out at his house, so all that was left was going somewhere, and I told him I wasn't up to it. If anything at all was going to continue with Edward and I, we were going to have to talk. I would not lie to Em. I already felt bad and regretted that I had to tonight. I responded to him as I continued on my way up to Alice's room.

Sorry Em, I will give you a call sometime tomorrow.

When I made it back up to Alice's room, I gave her the water and just sat watching her finish getting ready. As I drank my water, I tried to swallow my guilt; I wanted to have fun that night. When I shared with Alice how I was feeling, she told me not to feel guilty. She reminded me that when Emmett was dating Lauren, he ditched us plenty of times. That was true, but this was his brother, and it just didn't feel right. If I decided to continue to see Edward I would deal with it, but until then I was going to try not to let it eat at me.

Alice was just about ready; she looked so confidant and beautiful. Even though she wouldn't admit it, I could tell she was nervous, too. Neither of us had met Jasper, and I just hoped he was a nice guy, so Alice would have a good time that night.

At five o' clock we were ready with our dresses, shoes, and accessories on. Alice looked absolutely stunning; she had the most flawless skin and the dress hugged her curves just perfectly.

"Okay. Ready?" she asked with a big smile on her face.

I had the biggest butterflies in my stomach, and as the time grew closer, they grew larger.

"As I'll ever be," I responded.

She rolled her eyes. "Bella you look so gorgeous, Edward will be drooling." Alice always knew what to say.

"Thanks, Ally."

I think she knew I was thanking her for more than just the compliment - I was thanking her for being such an awesome friend and being there for me through everything.

It only took us about ten minutes to get to the hospital. We wore big coats to cover our dresses, because we were horribly embarrassed to be in such flamboyant outfits at a place like that. Even with the coats though, we were still getting strange looks. I could feel my face getting bright red. Alice just strutted through like she owned the place.

When we made it to the floor where Charlie was getting his treatment, we heard a loud cat call whistle. I turned to see none other than Jake standing at the other end of the hallway with a huge cheesy grin on his face.

"Geez ladies, I figured you knew I was working tonight but…" He took a step back and looked at us. "You didn't need to go all 'red carpet' for me."

"Shut it, Jake," Alice said, laughing.

"We're going to a dance and Charlie wants to meet my date before we go," I explained, feeling silly standing there in a gown.

"Oooh is this 'give me a ride to my car boy' you were with the other night?" he asked in a teasing voice.

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah. Wait… how did you know about him? Charlotte was here that night. Then it hit me. "Charlotte… I swear you two gossip like junior high girls," I said jokingly.

He just laughed it off and agreed with me. "Well, when it gets late in here, it gets quiet, whatcha expect?"

"Bella, it's almost five thirty," Alice said.

Crap, he was going to be there soon; I felt a little sick all of a sudden - the nerves were getting the best of me.

"Well, you two run off, have fun." Jake paused. "But don't do anything I would do," he added with a laugh.

"Thanks, Jake," we both said at the same time, heading toward Charlie's room.

We knocked on the door and stepped in. Mom was curled up in a chair, with a book, and Dad was asleep in his chair, with IVs hooked up and medication flowing. We tiptoed in and Mom jumped out of her chair.

In an excited whisper she came towards us, "Look at you girls! Take off those coats so I can see your gorgeous dresses!" I swear Mom was more excited than we were. From the ruffling around of getting our coats off, Dad woke up.

"Wow, you girls look way too old for your age." He paused, wiping the sleep from his eyes. "Absolutely beautiful, though," he added with a smile. Alice and I each walked up to give him a hug as Mom circled us, looking at every aspect of our outfits.

We still had a few minutes before Edward was supposed to be there so we sat down to talk a little. Being with my family was helping settle my nerves a little. After about five minutes, Charlie started struggling with his IV so that he could reach something behind his chair. I was about to jump up to help him when Mom beat me to it.

"Sit down, Bella, your dad has something for you two," Mom said with a sweet smile.

She reached behind his chair and handed him a small paper bag. "Thanks hun," he said with a smile. It was still hard for him to accept so much help.

"So, um... I didn't know what boys did these days but, well…" Charlie was not good with emotional moments - he usually left those for my mom - so we just sat while he struggled a little to find the right words.

"I didn't want the yahoos you two are going with to make you the only two to not have one if they forgot so…" With that, he pulled out two gorgeous wrist corsages. My eyes instantly started to water up. I looked over at my mom, and her expression mirrored mine.

My dad had always made everything special for the two girls in his life - flowers on birthdays and Valentine's. He had always made sure Christmas was extra special. He even added a 'daughter day', because he felt bad that Renee got a Mother's Day, and I didn't have a special day. When I was little I had felt left out. Lame, I know, but to this day we still did 'daughter day'. Even being the sickest he has ever been, he was still putting us first and making sure we were taken care of - Alice too.

I walked over to him, with tears flowing freely, to give him a huge hug. He had no idea how much that meant to me. Since he had been sick, I couldn't help but feel that I had lost a little of the Dad I was so used to. That gesture made me realize that he was still there, and he still loved me just as much as always.

"Thanks dad. I love you so much," I whispered into his neck as I hugged him.

"Of course, Bells. Now stop that crying, you two are going to have a fun night."

"And you're gonna screw up your makeup," Alice added loudly.

I knew that she was probably a little uncomfortable. Even though Charlie always made sure that Alice was included, I'm sure it just reminded her how absent her father was.

He opened the two little boxes and put them on each of our wrists. They matched our dresses perfect; I'm sure Renee had something to do with that. Mine had white lilies and little blue flowers with a blue satin ribbon. Alice's had white roses with black little sparkly swirls and ribbon.

Alice walked over to give Charlie a hug and I heard her say, "Thanks for thinking of me, Charlie." He gave her a reassuring pat on her back.

"Enough, girls. This is a happy night! It's your first dance!" Renee said, digging a camera out of her purse - always prepared.

"We need some pictures of you two together before those boys show up."

After her announcement, she started snapping pictures. A few pictures to Renee was more like a photo shoot.

After what seemed like five hundred pictures later, there was a knock on the door, and my stomach instantly did a flip.

"Come in," Charlie said in a gruff voice, sitting his chair all the way up.

The door seemed to open in slow motion, and in walked Edward in a black suit. He looked more handsome than anything I could ever have imagined. I could tell he had tried to tame his hair, but I was glad that it didn't work. I loved it just the way it was; it was a mess, but it was perfect. When we made eye contact, the most beautiful smile graced his face, and I was sure I mirrored it. A throat cleared in the background and we both turned to face a scowling Charlie.

"Um…" Edward cleared his throat. "Good evening, Chief Swan, I'm Edward Masen," he said walking forward to shake Charlie's hand. I could tell that he gave a good firm handshake, and I knew that was one of the things that Charlie judged during a first impression.

"Edward," was all he said.

"Hi, Edward, I'm Renee, Bella's Mom." She walked forward and actually hugged him; I thought I was going to die.

He seemed surprised at first, but quickly recovered wrapping an arm around her. When he did, I saw a box in his hand similar to that which Charlie had had earlier that evening. He did remember! That would earn big points with Charlie.

"Very nice to meet you, Mrs. Swan," he said stepping back.

"Oh, none of that! Call me Renee," She said, waving her hand in the air.

Edward smiled and nodded. I was standing behind him still; it was a small room and it made introductions even more awkward. He turned to look at me.

"Hi," he said in almost a whisper. "You look beautiful."

"Thank you." My voice came out broken; I needed to get my nerves under control.

He sheepishly brought the box up revealing another corsage. When he noticed I had one on, he looked confused.

"Uh, my dad gave us one earlier, just to make sure we had one," I explained quietly.

"That was very nice of him," Edward said with a smile. "That's okay, we can toss this."

"No!" I said a little louder than I meant to, "I mean… no, I would love to wear yours, too, if that's alright."

He smiled crookedly at me and added the flowers to the one I had on already. I didn't care if it looked funny, they both meant a lot to me for different reasons.

Alice cleared her throat. "Hi, Edward," she said, as if they were old buddies. He smiled and sent a little wave in her direction.

"So, Edward, why don't you have a seat?" Charlie suggested.

There was only one chair in the room unoccupied, and it was right next to Charlie. Edward walked over, looking a little pale all of a sudden, and sat down. Charlie started out by asking him about football. I knew Charlie liked to watch some of the high school games, but I had no idea that he knew of Edward already. After that, Charlie went through the normal questions.

"Where are you guys going tonight?"

"We're going to meet Jasper," he said, shooting a look in Alice's direction. "At a little Italian restaurant outside of town, and then just going to the dance."

Edward smoothly delivered the night's plan. I could tell Charlie was already impressed. Whenever Charlie asked Em anything in the past, he would stutter and clam up, and never look Charlie in the eye. It drove Charlie crazy. You could tell Edward was a little nervous, but he still came off very capable.

"What time will you have them home?" Charlie asked, raising his eyebrows. I had already been told to come home right after the dance.

"Right after the dance, sir. If that's alright?"

"That sounds good. So this Jasper guy isn't here..." he said in a questioning manner. "What's he like?"

"Um, well… Jasper is... he's a real funny guy. He has a great sense of humor." Charlie just nodded, noticing how Edward was a little indecisive on his answer. God, I hoped Jasper was a good guy.

"Ok, well, you be safe drivin' them around tonight," Charlie warned.

"Of course, sir," Edward assured.

"Edward, call me Charlie."

Ha! That was what I had been waiting for! I think he won Charlie over. I was really impressed with how Edward handled the whole 'meeting the parents' thing.

After a few more pictures, we all said goodbye to Renee and Charlie. As we were leaving, Edward walked over to my Dad and shook his hand again, and Renee managed to pull him into another hug. She also gave him the camera, demanding pictures of Alice and Jasper together. Edward agreed before we walked out of the door.

When the door was shut, Edward let out a big breath. He took his index finger and ran it between the collar of his shirt and his neck. When he saw that I was watching him, he straightened up, embarrassed he got caught.

"You did great; I think they really liked you," I told him, wanting to take his anxiety away. I was sure that was stressful for him.

"You think?" he asked, with a smile. I nodded back at him. We had been having a nice moment, but Alice managed to change that.

"So, Edward, you didn't set me up with some kind of freak, did you?" she asked accusingly.

"Um, what? No! Of course not, Jasper is... a lot of fun." For some reason whenever Jasper came up, it made Edward a little uneasy.

"We'll see," Alice said, and I could tell she was getting nervous.

We made it to the parking lot, and Edward walked to the passenger side of his car opening both of our doors for us. I sat in the front next to Edward, with Alice behind me. His car was super clean, and had a fresh smell, like he had hidden an air freshener in it. Edward walked around the front of the car to get to his door. Before he got in, Alice squeezed my arm.

"He is so freaking hot, Bella," she said in a whisper.

I didn't respond, because right when I was about to, Edward opened his door and got in. He started the car and we were on our way. The ride there was quiet. Alice was trying to fill every quiet space with dialogue, but Edward and I were too nervous to jump in just yet. But he did make sure to let us both know as we pulled up to the restaurant that we looked very nice.

When he parked, I noticed a guy waiting out front. He was dressed in an outfit similar to Edward's, however he was smoking a cigarette. He had shaggy, dark blond hair and a little scruff on his chin; he was handsome but no where close to Edward in my eyes, though.

"Please, God… tell me that's him," Alice said hopefully, from the backseat, leaning forward as far as she could.

Edward laughed. "Yep, that's Jasper." He got out of the car and waved him over. While Jasper was walking toward the car, he flicked whatever was left of his cigarette, and rubbed it out with the tip of his dress shoe. Alice took the time to let me know how pleased she was in the form of squeals. He was pretty cute, and Alice always did like the "bad boy" type.

Edward walked to the passenger side of the car, and opened my door. Jasper just kinda stood there, making no attempt to get Alice's door. I stepped out, and saw Edward give him a dirty look, and he then opened Alice's door as well.

"Jasper, this is Bella and Alice. Alice and Bella... Jasper."

Jasper gave Alice a smile, which she returned.

He seemed nice… until he opened his mouth.

"Damn, look at you, sexy," he said, strutting towards her looking like he was going to reach for her hips.

She took a big step back. "Excuse me?" she said, putting a hand on her hip. Uh oh.

He looked shocked that she stopped him. "Uh...um… well...um…" he continued to stutter, evidently surprised that she was not flattered by his comment. He looked back at us - his eyes begging for help.

Sorry buddy, no can do.

"I just meant that you look, uh, very… nice. I, uh, really like your dress and your, um, your arm… thing." He finally finished waving his arm around.

"Thanks," Alice said curtly. "And it's a bra-ce-let, not an arm thing," she said, pronouncing every syllable of the word as she brushed past him towards the restaurant.

Shit, that was not how I saw the evening going.

"Uh, I'm gonna just go get her," I said to Edward. When I looked at him, he was giving Jasper a murderous look. Jasper still just looked kinda shocked.

"I'm really sorry Bella, I'll talk to him. The reservations are under my name, I'll meet you in there in a second."

Right before I walked away, he leaned forward. I thought he was going to whisper something to me, but then I felt light pressure and heat on my cheek. When he pulled back, he gave me a soft smile, asking me, with his eyes, if that was okay. I just smiled back, and then reassured him that Alice may have an attitude, but I was sure she would be fine.

As I walked toward the restaurant, my cheek was still warm from where his lips were, and I resisted the urge to reach up and touch the spot where he had just kissed me. I was giddy inside, but my happiness was put out as soon as I entered the restaurant to find a fuming Alice, sitting on a bench.

"What the hell, Bella? Your lover boy set me up with a wannabe pimp!" she said, talking animatedly with her hands.

I really didn't want her to cause a scene, so I pulled her into the bathroom. We were the only ones in there, thank God. She turned to face me, with her hands on her hips.

"I know you're upset Alice, and I don't blame you, he was out of line." She just huffed in response.

"Edward was going to talk to him. I think he may just be nervous, maybe give him one more shot?"

She rolled her eyes.

"If you wanna go, we'll go. Edward can take us home," I offered. She was my best friend, and she came first; I didn't want her to be uncomfortable.

"No, I don't wanna, go," she said with a sigh.

"One more shot, but I will so kick him in the nuts if he goes for a boob grab or some shit," she warned me.

I couldn't help it, I started to laugh. Then we were both laughing. We agreed to start over and go find the boys. When we stepped out of the bathroom, they were right there waiting. I smiled at Edward, trying to let him know everything was alright.

"Uh, Alice, can I talk to you for a second over here?" Jasper asked, pointing to a bench.

She wouldn't make eye contact with him, just crossed her arms over her chest and nodded. walking away from him in that direction. He scrambled behind her.

Edward shook his head. "Shall we?" he asked, offering me his arm. I took it, and he led me to a booth towards the back of the restaurant.

He motioned for me to sit first, so I awkwardly crawled into the booth trying to not mess up my dress. He sat down next to me, and apologized for Jasper again. I waved him off, and informed him that we were starting fresh. He was so close to me in the booth, that our legs were touching a little, and it was sending shivers up my body. And damn, he smelled so good - like a fresh shower and boy.

I looked around the restaurant, to keep me from doing something embarrassing like sniffing him or something. The place was cute. It was decorated to make you feel like you were outside in Italy somewhere. There were street lamps and all the walls looked like the outside of buildings. It was very dark with a lot of candles lit around. It could have been very romantic, that was if our two best friends didn't try to kill each other.

We started talking, and we were hitting it off really well. When the waiter came to take our order, I realized that Alice and Jasper had been gone for a while, and started to wonder if I should go find them. I could tell Edward was thinking the same thing when he told the waiter we were waiting for two more.

Not two minutes later, Alice and Jasper rounded the corner, laughing. Alice had her hand in Jasper's arm, and they seemed to be playing nice. They sat down, and Alice looked over at me and winked. I knew that everything was okay at that point; I just prayed the rest of the night went smoothly.

"Bella?" Jasper asked and I looked over at him in attention.

"Sorry I didn't introduce myself. It's awesome to meet you," he said, reaching across the table to shake my hand. I saw Edward glaring across the table at him.

"Ed here just thinks you are the shit! Shit, no… I didn't mean that, I mean, uh, that you are a very….. nice lady," he said with a triumphant smile, like he had just preformed a new trick perfectly.

We all busted out laughing, and that broke the ice. The rest of the dinner was perfect.

Jasper was hilarious, and kept us all laughing. Even though Edward was a perfect gentleman, his dry sense of humor just bounced off of Jasper's more outlandish one. It was really hard to decide what to order so we all ended up sharing off of each other's plates. Alice and Jasper seemed to be getting along great after their rough start, and Edward could not have been more perfect. After we were done eating, the boys took care of the check, and helped us both out of the booth.

On the way out, Alice and I stopped at the bathroom to "freshen up". I was really just dying to know what Jasper said to win her over.

"What did he say?" I jumped her as soon as the bathroom door was shut.

"He apologized and said that he was nervous when he saw me, 'cause he thought I looked really beautiful. He said that he was trying to be cool or something, and that he was really dumb, and begged me to let him start over. Oh my gosh, Bella! He really is sweet, I mean, he's rough around the edges, but I like it."

I was so glad that he was able to get back into Alice's good graces; it wasn't always that easy. We left the bathroom quickly, not wanting to keep the boys waiting. When we stepped out, they were nowhere to be seen. I peaked outside and noticed it was raining and hard.

"Shit, I left my coat in Edwards's car." I remembered, when I saw Alice fastening the buttons on her own.

Next thing I knew, Edward's car pulled up to the front of the restaurant. He jumped out, and ran inside. He immediately slipped his suit jacket off and wrapped it around my shoulders.

"Do you want to ride with us, Alice, or Jazz?" Edward asked, giving her the option, in case she was still not comfortable.

"Jasper's fine, thanks," she said, with a big smile.

"Okay, he is driving that black car behind my mine." He pointed in the right direction. Jasper was driving a shiny black car that looked old, but nice. When I asked Edward about it, he told me that it was a '65 Mustang and that it was a totaled mess when Jasper got it from a junk yard. He had spent three years fixing it up on his own. I was impressed.

Alice walked ahead of us, and I saw Jasper jump out and run over to open her door. It made me smile.

Next thing I knew, Edward was leading me by my arm to his car, trying to shield me from the rain. He opened the door, making sure my dress was all in before he shut it. By the time he got in, he was soaked.

"I'm sorry Edward. You gave me your coat, now you're soaked."

"No worries, you'll pay," he said, with an evil, playful grin.

"Well, good thing I'm not scared of you," I said back.

"Hmm, you really shouldn't have said that."

I just looked at him, confused, and the next thing I knew, I was getting showered with water droplets. He was shaking his soaking hair like crazy - showering the car with his own rain storm. We both started laughing, and I playfully slapped him. After he had his fun, he started the car, and we were off to the dance, with Alice and Jasper following behind us.

I grew more nervous as we got closer to the school; I had never really danced before and didn't want to make a fool of myself.

"Whatcha thinking about over there?"

"Uh, nothing, just a little nervous about dancing," I admitted. It was better that he knew what he was getting himself in to.

"Yeah, well, if we get in there and you don't want to, we just...won't," he said with a reassuring smile, grabbing my hand - that was sitting in my lap - and giving it a gentle squeeze. He started to pull away, but I closed my hand on his, silently asking him to keep it there. It was amazing how his touch instantly calmed me. He looked over and smiled. His hand stayed there for the rest of the ride.

When we got to the school, the parking lot was crazy full. The rain had stopped, so I declined the offer of dropping me off up front. I didn't want to stand there alone. Alice and Jasper parked far away in the next available spot. We met up with them at the entrance. It seemed as if the dance was being held in the cafeteria. It was extremely dark, but there were strobe lights flashing., The music was loud and the whole place was packed with bodies. I was very uncomfortable, but, Alice… well, she wasn't. She squealed when she saw the room, kissed my cheek, told me to have fun, and then ran off with Jasper connected to her hand, trailing behind laughing.

I looked over at Edward, and he had the same look of apprehension that I was sure I had.

"So... you ready to go in?" He asked.

Was I ready? No. There was nothing about that that looked fun to me; I was just really overwhelmed, but I nodded anyway, and he led us in. I stayed close to him, keeping a grip on his arm, not wanting to lose him in the crowd. I swear every person in Forks under twenty was there. I spotted Alice, on the dance floor with Jasper, and it looked like she was already having an awesome time.

"So, what do you think?" Edward shouted to me over the music.

"Its, uh... wow," I said back.

I hoped I wasn't blowing it with him. I could see all the girls checking him out, dying to dance with him. I was just about to suggest that he should go dance with someone, when he grabbed my arm and leaned in, "This really isn't my thing… you wanna get out of here?" I was so relieved when he said that.

I nodded. "Please." I smiled up at him.

Once again, he grabbed my arm, leading us out of the mass of bodies. On accident, a girl slammed into me, breaking my connection with Edward; she almost knocked me over. When I regained my balance, I couldn't see Edward. I felt a hand grab my waist from behind, but it felt wrong. I spun around to see a greasy looking blond guy looking down at me.

"Hey sweetheart, you wanna ditch Masen and have a real party?" His breath smelled awful. I shook my head, but when I tried to walk away, his grip on me tightened. He was pulling me closer. I put both hands on his chest, with my arms stiff, in an effort to keep space between us. I was getting ready to push him, when I suddenly heard a velvety voice from behind me.

"Better let go, unless you wanna lose you arm, Newton." He remained calm, but his voice had a scary edge to it. The blonde guy looked up and smirked, loosening his grip. Edward put his arm protectively around my shoulder, and then pulled me behind him, blocking me with his body. With one more warning look to greasy, he led me outside. Once we got outside, he spun me to face him; he looked pissed. He looked very much like he did that day in the parking lot of the school with Em.

"Are you okay? You were right behind me, and then you were gone. Did he hurt you? I swear to God if…"

"Edward, stop!" I cut him off. "It was really no big deal. The guy was a creep, but he didn't do anything. I'm fine." I reassured him. "It's okay."

"

No, it's not okay. Not at all."

I didn't say anything back, 'cause I had no idea what to say. I just started rubbing up and down his arms trying to help him relax. He reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose. He ran a hand through his hair, and visibly started to relax.

"C'mon, you must be freezing. Let's get you warmed up in the car." He put his arm around me again, leading me to the car, and opening the door.

Once he sat down, he turned to me. "I have a hard time controlling my temper sometimes. I'm sorry if I scared you again. I just about lost it when I saw that slime grabbing you. He had no right to touch you."

I didn't want him to get upset again. I took a chance, and I wasn't sure where my bravery came from, but I leaned forward and placed a small kiss on his cheek, like he had done to me earlier in the night.

"Thank you," I whispered in his ear.

When I pulled back, I was rewarded with the most breathtaking crooked smile. We ended up sitting in his car, listening to music and talking for the rest of the night. I was having the best time ever. I couldn't help but feel guilty that I had kept him from the dance, though.

"I'm really sorry that we didn't dance at all," I said, looking down - too embarrassed to make eye contact.

"Don't worry about it. I've never gone to one of these things before, and honestly I don't plan on going again."

My head shot up. He had never been to one before? I was shocked. I wondered if he was just saying that to make be feel better, or if it was true.

"I had a much better time talking with you," he said, kissing the back of my hand that he was holding. I bit my lip to keep myself from giggling, and I know I was blushing.

"Me too," I added quietly.

"I'd really like to see you again," he said, looking me in the eye.

"I would love that," I said back, thrilled that he still wanted me, but then I thought of something.

"But Edward… Em, is one of my best friends, I wont lie to him," I said softly.

He let out a big sigh.

"I won't ask you to do that Bella, but I just want to warn you. Em and I… we really don't get along, like… at all. He's not gonna be happy. I can deal with him, that's fine. I won't be okay if he gives you trouble about it, though," he said, completely serious. I felt like he was worried about nothing, I thought Em would understand.

"I really think he will be okay with it, Edward. We just need to be honest with him," I said.

"We'll see. When do you want to tell him?"

I thought about it for a moment, and then remembered that Em wanted to meet the next day.

"Uh, we talked about meeting tomorrow. I will just tell him then; I don't want him to think we're hiding anything." Edward let out a big sigh, but agreed. He asked me if I wanted him to come, but I felt it was better if I just talked to Em on my own. Edward didn't seem to like that, but didn't object.

"So uh…" Edward cleared his throat, and ran his hand through his hair. "What are you going to tell him about… us?" he asked, motioning to the space between us.

The way he said "us" made my heart skip a beat; I liked the sound of it. The possibility of him and I being an "us." What would I tell him? I dunno… what were we, friends? Was he my boyfriend? I wanted that but did not want to assume.

"Uh, I dunno… what should I tell him?" I asked, putting the pressure back on him.

"Well, if your okay with it… I know its fast, but, uh… I would really like it if your were my... uh girlfriend," he said, looking up through his lashes.

I tried to play it cool, but I was screaming inside. This perfect guy wanted me to be his girlfriend; I was ecstatic.

"Okay," I said quietly.

His head shot up."Really?"

"I mean, yeah, I would like that, too, if that's what you want," I said, wondering if maybe he didn't mean it.

"Yeah, that's definitely what I want," he said, looking into my eyes.

He was starting to lean in, I think possibly for a kiss, when my damn phone went off.

Alice.

I leaned back in my chair.

"Hello."

"WHERE ARE YOU!" I held the phone away from my ear, because, she was screaming over the music. I tried three times to tell her I was in Edwards's car, but she couldn't hear me over the music. I looked over at Edward and he was laughing at the absurdity of the situation. Finally, I just hung up and texted her.

Sitting in Edwards car, meet us here when you're ready to leave.

Five minutes later, a laughing, happy Alice and Jasper came walking out, hand in hand. Alice leaned in the window of Edwards's car.

"We're gonna go to the diner and grab milkshakes, you guys wanna go?" she asked.

I looked over at Edward, because I didn't want to decide for him, but I promised Charlie that I would come straight home, and my dad didn't need any stress from me in the state he was in. I was about to say something, when Edward spoke for me.

"Thanks, but I promised Charlie that I would bring Bella right home. Next time, alright?" he said, leaning over me a little to talk to Alice.

She just shrugged, and gave me an awkward hug through the window, and then walked over to get into Jasper's car.

"Was that okay?" Edward asked.

"What?" I wasn't sure exactly what he was asking.

"That I take you home… I really don't wanna piss of my new girlfriend's father," he said with a smirk.

Damn, I like the way "girlfriend" sounded a little too much, I think.

"No, I agree. I want my dad to like my new boyfriend," I said, with a playful wink.

Edward just laughed and started the car. By the time we pulled up to my house, it was close to midnight, and even though we didn't dance, I was tired. Edward walked over to my door and opened it, helping me out by my hand. He walked me up to the front porch.

"Thanks for going with me tonight," he said, looking down at me.

"Thanks for taking me. I had a great time." It was true. I couldn't have imagined a better night.

"Well, I bet the Chief is waiting for you," he said, nodding toward the door. "Call me tomorrow after you talk to Em?" He asked, sounding a little worried.

"I will," I agreed. He leaned in and gave me another chaste kiss on the cheek, and then started to walk back to his car.

He turned around at the end of the drive. "Goodnight, Bella"

"Night, Edward." With that, I walked into the house.

Not surprised at all, I saw that Charlie had made camp in the living room. He was asleep in his recliner, with the television on mute. I felt a twinge of guilt knowing how sick he was, but that he still waited up for me. I walked over and kissed his cheek, shaking him a little.

"Dad, I'm home, you can go to bed now." He opened his eyes, and I could tell he was a little disoriented.

He looked at his watch and rubbed his face a couple of times. "Did you have a nice time?" he asked, his voice thick with sleep.

"Yeah, I really did. Edward is great."

He just grunted in response.

I watched him struggle to get out of his chair and up the stairs. It made me feel sad, seeing how weak he was becoming; it was getting worse everyday. I didn't try to help him, though, knowing that it would hurt his pride to have his teenage daughter physically help. So, I just stayed close behind him going up the stairs, and made sure he got into bed with Mom, because she was fast asleep.

"Night, Dad. Thanks again for the corsage," I whispered into their room.

"Night Bells, love ya."

It was really hitting me hard, for some reason, how sickly he was looking. He tried to be so strong, but if you watched, you would see how the littlest things were a struggle for him.

I went into my room and shed my dress and accessories, and climbed into my bed, exhausted. I knew I should wash my face, but I didn't have the energy. I fell asleep quickly that night, blissfully unaware of the war against one of my best friends I would face the next day.


	9. Chapter 9 Rusted From the Rain

_**I stumble through the wreckage, rusted from the rain**_

_**There's nothing left to salvage, no-one left to blame**_

_**Among the broken mirrors, I don't look the same**_

_**I'm rusted from the rain, I'm rusted from the rain**_

_**-Billy Talent**_

**BPOV**

I woke up to my mom bouncing on my bed like a sixth grader.

"Did you have fun? Did he kiss you? Are you gonna see him again?"

I knew the spitfire questions were not going to stop, so I pulled my covers over my head and tried to hide. My mom and I were different; she was very hyper, loved to talk and her teenage years were her favorite. I was a little more shy and not that I minded my teen years, but I they wouldn't be my favorite. She was excited for my teen age years - dating and all that. So, I guess when I finally had my first date, I shouldn't have been surprised at how she reacted.

"Oh, Bella, he was so cute."

Oh God, she was trying to "talk on my level."

I pulled the covers off and sat up. I could feel the makeup crusted on my eyes, and my tangled hair. I felt gross and wanted a shower.

"Yes, Mom, he is." I decided that I would indulge her, since she seemed so happy and she hadn't really seemed this way since dad had gotten sick.

So, I told her just about everything. Most girls would love to have a mom as cool as her, and I was extremely grateful that she was mine. She ate up every word I said, acting like the story from the night before was the most exciting thing that she had ever heard. By the end of it, she decided that she loved Edward, and that she was glad that Alice had put Jasper in his place.

"So, when are you going out with Edward again?" she asked excitedly.

"Well, he sorta asked me to be his girlfriend," I replied in a voice barley above a whisper.

"Oh, Bella, that's wonderful!" She looked genuinely happy for me. "But what will you do about Emmett?"

What the hell? Why was everyone so freaking concerned about what Emmett thought?

"Well, I was gonna tell him today. I mean, seriously, why is everyone so concerned about what Em thinks?" I was a little irritated; Mom didn't even know that Em and Edward didn't get a long.

"Well, honey, it's obvious that Em has feelings for you."

My jaw dropped.

Was she serious? Emmett was one of my best friends, but that was it. He had dated other girls. Even though I hadn't dated much yet, that had nothing to do with Em.

"No, Mom, you're wrong. We're just friends. We always have been, and always will be."

Mom and Dad were too old fashioned; you could most definitely be friends with a guy with out it being more.

"Okay, well, just be careful when you tell him; he may take it harder than you think."

I simply nodded my head, while inwardly rolling my eyes. I just wanted to tell him so everyone would drop it already. They would soon see that Em couldn't care less.

"Well, I have to work today, so could you take your Dad in tonight?" I nodded.

After she left the room, I got out of bed. I jumped in the shower and washed all of the makeup and hairspray away, from the previous night. When I got out, I felt refreshed. I was in an awesome mood. I went to find my phone to call Alice, and see if she wanted to hang out with me. When I opened it, I noticed that I had a text from Edward. My heart skipped as I opened the message.

I had an awesome time tonight, please call me and let me know how things go with Em. Can't wait to see you again.

The message would have been beyond perfect if he had not mentioned Em - Once again. I didn't text back, since that was from the night before. I called Alice, and she didn't answer. She texted me about an hour later, letting me know she would call me later.

The rest of the afternoon went smoothly. I kept replaying the night before in my head. My mom left for work, so I cleaned the house up and did some homework, before I needed to take Dad in. He had been in his room all day. Things were getting worse fast, so he stayed in his room because he just didn't feel good. It was about a half an hour before he needed to be there, so I walked up to his room and knocked on the door... no answer. I knocked again

"Dad?" I shouted through the door.

All I heard was an awful guttural noise. I swung the door opened, because I was worried. The image I saw was heartbreaking and tears sprung to my eyes immediately. Charlie was sitting on the edge of the bed in sweats and a t-shirt; he was bent over and violently vomiting into a bowl in his hands. He looked so…broken.

"Dad," I whispered, walking over to him, and rubbing circles on his back, hoping to soothe him the best that I could.

After he was done, he spit into the bowl a couple of times, and then he rubbed a hand over his face. He took a couple deep breaths, his shoulders slumped and his eyes looked glassy and lifeless.

"Bella, wait for me downstairs." I wasn't leaving him like that.

"No, I'll help you get ready we just..."

"Downstairs!" He cut me off, almost shouting.

I was shocked; Charlie never raised his voice at me. I just stood there staring at his back; watching it rise and fall with labored breaths. After a second, I slowly backed out of the room, tears streaming down my face. What did I do wrong?

I walked down the stairs and sat on the couch. I heard my phone ringing, but ignored it. I wiped my eyes and took a few breaths to calm down. About ten minutes later I heard the door upstairs open. I saw Charlie appear at the top of the stairs; he had changed his clothes, and put a hat on to cover up his balding head. He looked so pale. He reached the top step, taking it slowly. It took every fiber of my being not to jump up and try to help him come down. I watched him struggle, step by step. He never looked my direction. When he made it down, he walked straight to the front door and went out.

I scrambled to get my car keys and cell phone; I followed him out, and locked the door behind me. I turned to see him struggling to get himself into the passenger's seat of the truck.

I hopped into the driver's seat, and started the truck; I pulled out of the drive in silence. It had still been getting dark earlier, and that, along with the rain, made it hard to see. I looked over to see Charlie leaning against the passenger side window, with his chin resting on his hand. I had never seen him look so wrecked. I drove quietly, and once we were pulling in the hospital, he broke the silence.

"Bella…" I looked over at him in attention, and I saw nothing but pain in his eyes. "I'm sorry; I didn't mean to raise my voice at you," he said, looking right into my eyes.

"It's alright, Dad, I know you don't feel good." I wasn't mad at him at all. I couldn't imagine how he felt.

"No, Bella, it's not 'alright'. This is hard for me. I'm not used to needing help, and I'm not used to feeling this sick, but it's still no excuse. You need to understand that this is all new for me." He stopped, and took a big breath. "I really didn't ever want you to see me like that. Thank you for your help, honey, I need it," he said, making a big effort to smile.

I just smiled back. I knew I didn't need to say anything. He knew that I forgave him, even though I felt that there was nothing to forgive. Through all of this, he had not felt great by any means, but now, well, now it was really bad. I had never seen my dad be anywhere close to helpless, and he was getting close to that now. It scared the shit out of me.

Once I got Dad all settled in, I went to talk to Charlotte, letting her know that I had seen him throwing up a lot earlier. Very carefully and softly, she let me know that that was to be expected and with the amounts of chemo they were giving him, she suspected that it would only get worse. This news made my heart drop… worse? How could it get worse?

I felt very somber as I made my way down to the lobby; I sat on my favorite couch trying to clear my mind. In my haste to leave the house I forgot to bring my bag, so I had nothing to do for the next four hours or so… awesome. I felt a buzz in my pocket, and upon checking my phone, realized I had a text from Em, two missed calls, also from him, and one from Alice.

I looked at the text from Em,

Thought we were hanging out today? Call me.

Crap! I had totally forgotten. Well, I wonder if he feels like being bored here with me. I called him, and he picked up on the first ring, I let him know that my mom had to work and that he could come see me here if he wanted. He agreed and said he would head out.

I had nothing to do, so I basically stared at the wall, absorbed in my thoughts and worries about my Dad.

"Hey, Bella!" Em's happy voice broke me out of my trance; I hadn't even heard him walk in.

"Hi, Em," I said, plastering a smile on my face.

"What's wrong?" he asked, putting a hand on my leg - instantly knowing something was off. I told him a short version of what happened with Charlie, leaving a lot out - not wanting to embarrass my dad. As I told him, I felt the tears come back, and I quickly wiped them away. I didn't want to talk about it anymore, so I tried to change the subject.

"Enough of this sad shit. I actually have some pretty great news," I said, excited to share the news with my best friend.

"Really? Shoot, what's the news?" he asked, really interested.

"Well, okay, this is gonna seem really random, but I didn't want to say anything before I knew if it would be more or not." I paused, and Em made a sign with his hands signaling for me to continue.

"Well, I have been talking to this guy for a little while, and, well, we had a date last night, and he asked me to be his girlfriend. I said yes!"

Em's face fell. He tried to recover but I caught it.

"Really? Oh… uh… awesome," he said, clearing his throat twice. "So, uh…who….I mean who is he?" he finished, with his classic Emmett grin.

"Well, your gonna laugh. After we ran into each other one night, randomly, we got to talking and now…" I trailed off.

Em just stared at me expectantly.

"It's actually Edward," I said.

Em stopped moving… like completely… his whole body stiff. I mean, I wasn't even sure if he was breathing.

"What Edward?" he asked, in a low monotone voice.

"Uh, how many Edwards do you know in Forks, Em?" He didn't say anything so I clarified, "Your brother."

So I thought I had seen Emmett's face fall before, but there was no question this time. He was turning red; I was just waiting for the steam to come out his ears for the picture of pure anger to be complete. He sat unmoving like that, for what seemed like forever - he was scaring the shit out of me. I put a tentative hand on his shoulder.

"Em?"

"What the fuck do you mean you're Edward's 'girlfriend', Bella?" He jumped up, shoving my hand off his shoulder, making air quotes around the word girlfriend. I just sat there staring up at his form that was towering over me. To say I was stunned, would have been an understatement. I had never seen Emmett lose his cool like this.

"Uh…" I started to speak, but he just kept shouting. There were not very many people in the lobby, but those that were, were now staring at us. I was too shocked to even be embarrassed yet.

He was going on and on saying he couldn't believe me, and that I was betraying him, after a while I just stopped listening, trying to find a happy place inside myself. I had never had anyone freak out on me like that.

"Seriously, are you stupid? Edward is a piece of shit, what the hell are you thinking?"

My head snapped up at this. Am I stupid? Um, well last time I checked, no.

Edward is a piece of shit? Well, he wasn't the one yelling at me in the middle of the hospital, after just hearing what had happened to me that evening.

I was pissed by this point. How dare he act like that? Who the fuck did he think he was? I was still sitting, and he was still standing above me, so I slowly stood to my feet, making direct eye contact with him, even though I had to look up because of our height difference. I didn't know what I looked like, but whatever fire he saw in my eyes must have scared him 'cause he shut up mid sentence.

"I'm sorry, Emmett, if you don't agree with my decision." He went to interrupt me, but I put my hand up to stop him. I continued in the calmest voice I could manage, "BUT, your reaction is inexcusable! You may not get along with Edward, but he has been nothing but a perfect gentlemen to me. That's way more than I can say about you."

With that, I stepped around him, and walked away. I wouldn't let him see me cry. I didn't take the elevator, 'cause I didn't want him to follow me. I went into the first room that he could not… the girl's restroom. My chest felt heavy and I was having a hard time catching my breath. Thank God it was empty, because as soon as the door shut, I let myself have a complete breakdown. I couldn't take that on top of everything else that had been going on in my home life, too.

**EPOV**

Emmett had left about an hour ago to meet Bella, I was nervous as shit. I couldn't care less what he thought, but if he upset Bella in anyway, then I would be pissed.

When I came home from the dance the night before, the only thing my mom said was,

"Thank you for being on time." I didn't really give a shit if she cared if I had a good time or not, but don't be all damned overprotective. That's the thing, it wasn't overprotective, it was all about control.

I was just about to reach the stairs when Em asked, "Where were you?" Shit.

"Uh, I went to the dance." I motioned to my obvious attire.

"Oh cool." That was that, and I went upstairs.

I even texted Bella, I just wished she would have let me be there when she told him; she was being a little naive about the situation. I knew Em would never physically hurt her - if I had thought that at all, she would not have had a choice, I would have been there.

I know Em, though, and he has a bad habit of being a… how do I put it… a bitch. He would throw hissy fits. I was used to them, but I wasn't sure how much of that he had ever shown to his friends. He had learned not to start shit with me, 'cause while he would have his two year old tantrums, I didn't have time for that shit. I would punch him to shut his ass up, and then leave the situation.

I was sitting on the couch, in the den, reading, and the next thing I knew Emmett was on top of me, trying to hit me. The douche had no idea how to fight. I threw him off and put him in a position where he couldn't fight me. Even though he was bigger than me, fucker had no idea how to use his size. His famous move was to lie on his back and try to kick me, but that didn't work. He was bright red and breathing heavily.

I was now breathing hard, trying to keep him down.

"What the fuck, Emmett!"

"You stay the fuck away from Bella!"

He screamed at the top of his lungs. Hmmm, guess he didn't take it so well. Shocker. Emmett had always been jealous of me, I didn't know why. I was more athletic and shit, and Dad gave me more attention because of it, but I didn't want it and he knew it. Emmett always had to work to keep friends, and for the simple fact that I didn't want any, people seemed to flock to me. He only decided he wanted Bella, because he didn't want me to.

I really cared for her.

"Calm the fuck down, and I'll talk to you about it," I said, twisting the arm I had a hold of.

He screamed out in pain. Really? He was such a drama queen.

"You knew I liked her!"

Back to the screaming again.

Before I could even get him to calm down, Mom cam bursting through the door, screaming for us to stop. That was another thing, Emmett was a momma's boy. I guess since our dad acted like Em didn't exist, he clung to her.

"Why are you two trying to kill each other?" She demanded when we finally parted. Em was hiding behind her. I went back to the couch, and found my book. Fucker had ripped it. When I didn't say, anything Emmett decided to yell.

"'Cause mom he's fucking Bella Swan!" My jaw dropped and my feet jumped up against my will. I lunged at him and my fist made direct contact with his face, over and over.

After that, my mom went and babied little Emmy, and after she tucked his ass in bed, or whatever the fuck she was doing, she came and found me in the bathroom cleaning my bloody knuckles.

"How could you?" She hissed at me, from the bathroom door. I turned to her with a look of confusion on my face?

"What? How could I beat Em for shouting lies and talking about a girl that way?"

She would have lost it if I had said anything that Emmett did downstairs, but if her baby does it, she finds a way to make it ok.

"No, Edward. I let you go out and what do you do? You sleep with the first girl you see. You disappoint me!" she said, now shouting a little herself.

Was I in the fucking twilight zone? Just because Emmett said it didn't make it true.

"I haven't even kissed Bella Swan," I said in an even voice, doing everything I could so I wouldn't shout at my mother.

"Oh bull, Edward. You and I both know it. Why would you attack Em if it wasn't true? You were mad because he told on you."

Wow she just had all that shit figured out didn't she.

"Well, Mom," I started with gritted teeth, "Did you ever think of asking me? No, you didn't. I hit Em because I didn't like him talking about her that way. Isn't she supposed to be his friend? He obviously has no respect for her." I pointed out, "I do respect her - a lot. That's why I hit Em and that's why I haven't even kissed her yet." I was leaning against the sink, and I looked up into the mirror, making direct eye contact with her through the reflection. "Bella is my girlfriend and Emmett will just have to get over it, and if he talks about her like that again, he'll get a lot worse than a black eye."

She stood there completely taken back; I had talked back before, but never like that. I was sure that the shock of me dating someone was overwhelming, too. I brushed past her and headed to my room. I would beat his ass again in a heartbeat. How dare he make her sound that way. If he thought he was hurting me, he was wrong. He was ruining her reputation, not mine. What an awesome fucking friend. As soon as I thought that, I stopped. It hit me like a ton of bricks… if he came home like that, how did he leave her? I immediately called her. I called three times and texted twice. No response. It made my stomach churn. I grabbed my keys and left to go check on her.

My mom was at the table, drinking a glass of wine. "Where do you think you're going?" she asked, coming towards me. What did she think she was going to do to stop me, I was twice her size.

"Out, I'll be right back."

"Oh, I don't think so." She probably kept going but I couldn't hear her after the door shut.

I drove past the Swan's and it was pitch black, with no cars in the driveway. I called Jazz to see where Alice lived, knowing he dropped her off the night before. I figured if she was upset, she would go to her best friend's. He told me the address, and kept talking; I hung up on him. I needed to find her - I didn't have time to bullshit with him right then.

As I pulled up to Alice's house, there was a big fucking surprise in her driveway…Jasper's car. Why the fuck was he there the next day? When he stepped on the front porch, I realized he was still in his suit from the night before. Fucker promised me he wouldn't pull that shit. Some fucking friend. I got out of the car and he could tell I was pissed.

"What the fuck, Jazz?"

He promised he wouldn't sleep with her.

"Shit, man, it's not what it looks like," he said holding his hands up defensively.

"What the fuck ever! I don't have time for this shit." I went to walk around him, but he put a hand on my chest to stop me. I looked down at his hand, and then back up to his face. Whatever he saw in my eyes made him drop his hand, and fast.

"Just listen, okay? So, I went to drop her off last night and the front window was broken." I looked over and the front window was smashed. "She was fucking scared, alright? Yeah I stayed, she begged me. Her dad was gone and she was scared. We didn't do shit, we talked all night, and I slept on the fucking floor."

I believed him, but I really didn't have time for it, so I went to walk past him again, and he tried to stop me again.

"Dude, I was trying to tell you she's not here. Alice tried to call her and she didn't answer."

I didn't want to talk to him right then, so I shoved passed him, waking into the house.

"Alice!" I shouted into the house, and next thing I know 'the elfin one' rounded the corner, phone attached to her ear. When she saw me, she took it down and closed it.

"I can't get a hold of her, Edward," she said, sounding worried. "Wait, why are you so upset? What the hell did you do to her?"

What the fuck? Me? I did nothing! I took a deep breath to calm down before I spoke. I explained to her that I asked Bella to be my girlfriend, which caused her to start squealing. Once she stopped, I explained what happened with Em and me, and why I was trying to find her. Alice seemed almost as pissed at Em as I was.

"You said you checked her house and it was dark?" I nodded. "Well, she's at the hospital with her dad then."

Shit, why didn't I think of that? After I had that info, I jumped in my car and sped in the direction of the hospital. I jogged in and went upstairs, where I had met her dad the night before; Charlie was asleep in a chair. No Bella in sight. My stomach dropped. When I was just about to walk out of the room, a nurse walked in. She stopped, surprised to see someone in here.

"Uh, hi… Um, I'm a friend of his daughter, have you seen her?"

"Who, Bella?" I nodded. "Um, not in a while. She usually hangs out in the lobby."

Before she could continue I headed back that way. I hadn't seen her when I came in, but I was in a hurry to get up to her dad's room, and I could have missed her.

I got off the elevator and looked around the lobby and saw Bella nowhere. I went back to the parking lot, and saw that her dad's truck was still there. I went back in and sat on the couch where we had talked before. I was trying to think of where to look next, when I felt a tap on my shoulder, and turned to see an old woman who was at least in her seventies.

"I'm sorry, but, you aren't looking for a young girl with brown hair are you?"

I bet I had looked frantic, as if I was obviously looking for someone.

"I am, actually," I said, standing up.

"Oh, well, she could use a friend. Her boyfriend was in here yelling at her not that long ago - caused a pretty big scene. Made the poor thing cry. She went into the girl's bathroom to get away from him and has not come out since."

My blood was boiling - Emmett was gonna pay.

"Thank you."

I didn't bother correcting her that I was her boyfriend not that piece of shit at my house. Bella was more important.

I made it to the girl's bathroom, and put my ear against the door. I could hear sobs on the other side. I didn't give a shit that it was the girl's bathroom; I opened the door and went in. Damn… the girls had way nicer bathrooms than we did. She was sitting in a little area that looked like it was for moms with babies. There was a little bench that she was sitting on, and she looked so broken; it made my anger rise. I pushed it down, not wanting to upset her anymore. I didn't care that I hadn't known her very long, she was already very important to me and it killed me to see her like that.

When she heard the door close, her head popped up, and her eyes were so puffy and red from crying, and her shirt sleeve was all stretched and ruined from her using it as a Kleenex. I walked over to her and sat down next to her. Without a word, I put my arm around her and she broke down with another round of sobs into my chest.

After a while, she calmed down and started breathing normally. I walked her to the sink, and wetted down some paper towels. She sat on the edge of the counter and I cleaned her face up. I was gonna kill Emmett. There wasn't anyone who could get in my way.

I looked at her and she looked so sad.

"What happened?"

She looked down; she didn't want to talk about it.

I got her to leave the bathroom. She didn't want to go to the lobby - embarrassed from the scene earlier, so we found another little waiting room on a different floor, and sat down.

"Bella, what did he do?" I grabbed her hand.

"It's not just him, Edward."

What did that mean? Did I do something?

"Uh…..well, I'm sorry for whatever I did."

Her head shot up.

"Oh, no, Edward, you didn't do anything."

I let a breath out that I had been holding.

"Bella, please tell me what's going on." I pleaded.

After that, she took a deep breath and told me what had happened earlier that evening, and then what happened with Emmett later on.

"I'll kill him." I was pissed after I heard what exactly he had said to her.

I stood up, trying to calm down a little by walking around the room. He asked her if she was stupid. He was the dumbest shit I know. She couldn't even get through the story without crying again.

"Edward, no, you can't." She jumped up, and ran over to me, grabbing my arm. Her touch made me calm down instantly.

"I'm fine. I just had a hard day, and obviously he was hurt."

"That's no excuse." Because I didn't want to upset her more, I agreed to not hurt Em.

"How did you know where I was?"

I didn't want her to think I was some crazy stalker, so I gave her the edited version of what happened at home between Em and me. I explained that I was worried about her and wanted to see if she was okay.

"That's really sweet Edward, thank you," she said, looking up through her lashes, blushing.

We sat back down and she realized that she needed to go meet her dad to take him home. Even though she told me that I didn't need to, I walked her upstairs to her dad. I said a quick hello to Charlie, before heading back down to the parking lot. I drove around a little, forcing myself to be completely calm before I went home.


	10. Chapter 10 Cancer

**_Now turn away,_**

**_'Cause I'm awful just to see_**

**_'Cause all my hairs abandoned all my body,_**

**_Oh, my agony,_**

**_Baby, I'm just soggy from the chemo,_**

**_We're counting down the days to go_**

**_It just ain't living_**

**_-My Chemical Romance_**

**BPOV**

"No, go out and have fun," Charlie said again.

I was trying to talk him into letting me stay at the hospital. I was supposed to have a date with Edward that night, but Mom had been called into work, so I had to take Dad to his treatment unexpectedly. He was so sick, and the last thing I wanted to do was leave him there alone.

"Edward and I can go out anytime, it's fine. I'd rather be here with you."

He scoffed at me, "Why? Is it that you love to watch me sleep, or is it when I throw up?"

He caught me off guard with his response.

"Bella, hun, just go," he said with a huge sigh. "Edward's a good guy, and you can't keep canceling on him to be here."

I was glad to hear him say that about Edward. It took about an hour of convincing him that Edward wasn't the one to make me cry that night that Em lost his shit. After Edward walked me up to my dad's room, Dad went into interrogation mode when he saw that I had been crying. He immediately assumed Edward did something to cause me to be upset. I couldn't convince him otherwise, so I finally just told him what happened.

He was not thrilled on the thought of me having a boyfriend, but he loved what Edward had done to protect me and that he came to check on me that night. Emmett, on the other hand, well he had become a permanent member of Charlie's "shit list", but Charlie pretty much loved Edward. It had been about a month since all of that happened. Charlie made it clear that Em was not allowed in the house. No problem there. Even though it was not necessary, Edward also reassured him that he would not let Em bug me.

Edward and I had spent a lot of time together. He had taken me to movies, out to dinner, or we would just hang out at my house. But much of it had been spent in the lobby, of the hospital, where we had first met. He had spent many evenings there, keeping me company, after his football practice. I was falling for him, fast, and it scared me. It was odd though, because at that point, he pretty much knew everything about me. I felt like I knew a lot about him, but just like Em, he was also very guarded about his home life.

He had cancelled on me more than once; calling me sounding very upset. He would say something had come up and he couldn't make it. I wanted to believe him, but I could hear who I assumed was his dad screaming in the background. It made me sick to think someone was treating him badly at home. The next time I had seen him, I had asked him about it, and his whole body went stiff. He admitted that it was his dad I had heard, but not to worry about him. Yeah right. He wouldn't go into any more detail, and I didn't want to push, but it would be a lie if I said I didn't worry about it all the time.

"Knock, knock." Edward opened the door, sticking his head inside.

"Hey Edward! Come on in." Charlie seemed just about as excited that Edward was there as I was.

Edward was quickly becoming the son Charlie never had. Some nights, when Edward would visit, if Dad was feeling ok, we would stay up there and they would talk sports all night.

"Hi, sweetheart." He walked over a kissed my check. We still had not moved past cheek kissing and hand holding. I didn't want to make the first move, and he was too much of a gentleman to try yet.

"Hi," I replied with a smile.

"Charlie." He walked over, and shook my dad's hand.

"Have a seat." Charlie motioned to the open chair next to me.

Edward took his rain-soaked jacket off and sat down. He had been freshly showered after football practice; his hair was still wet, making it look darker and a little matted down. He was usually clean-shaven, but that time he had a little bit of stubble on his face. I still wasn't used to how attracted I was to him.

"How are ya feeling tonight?" He always asked this when he came up to say hi to Charlie.

"It's a good day, don't worry about me. You need to get this girl out of here to have a good night." Edward laughed at Charlie's response.

"I plan on it," he said smiling over at me.

Charlie was still protective, and even tried to have "the talk" with me at one point, when he found out Edward and I were dating officially. Thank God he got too uncomfortable, because all he said was,

"Ok….um…so here's the thing Bells. Uh….well when you….er, when….just don't do it okay?"

After that, he did the smart thing and handed it over to Mom. I thought I was gonna die of embarrassment.

Edward had proven himself, though. Always picking me up and bringing me home on time, and giving Charlie information before he had to ask for it. Edward and Dad talked briefly about whatever game was on the night before, and then Edward turned to me.

"You ready to go?"

I looked over at Charlie, still hesitant to leave.

He looked so frail; he had lost a ton of weight, and his hair was all gone. He refused visits from his friends, because he was embarrassed, and he was just too sick to see anyone. It had not been a good day like he told Edward it was. He had been throwing up all day. He had the worst shakes I had ever seen and the chemo had gotten to the point where it was burning his skin inside out. The palms of his hands were home to chemical blisters from the chemo running through his veins. He was getting worse everyday; I think I had seen him at his lowest. I will never tell anyone what I had seen the other day.

I had come home from school - I was supposed to go to Alice's, but she had to stay after for a test retake. I had walked into the house and it was silent. I went upstairs and heard a muffled noise coming from the bathroom. When I'd rounded the corner, I saw that the bathroom door was open. What I'd seen then, will never leave me. The image before me stole all the air out of my lungs. Dad was sitting on the ground in his bathrobe, with his back to me. I was sure he had just gotten done throwing up. He was leaning against the bathtub for support. His body was shaking with sobs. I was almost seventeen years old, and I had never seen him cry; not even a tear, no watery eyes. Not even at his mother's funeral, never.

The pain he was in had just gotten unbearable and he had lost everything; his job, social life, his pride, and any sense of normalcy. He couldn't even eat normally because he would just throw it back up. The last thing I wanted to happen was for him to know I had seen him in that broken state, it would've killed him. As quietly as I could, I backed down the stairs, avoiding the creaky steps, and left the house. I drove around for hours, having to pull over because I couldn't see through the tears of my own that wouldn't stop flowing. I returned home at a time he thought I would have been back from Alice's.

When I walked in the front door, he had still looked just as sick, but he was sitting in his recliner watching sports. He forced a weak smile.

"Did you have fun with Alice?" His voice had sounded strained, with his teeth gritted in pain.

"Uh, yeah I did, thanks." I hated lying to him, but he couldn't know I had seen him before.

"How are you feeling today?" I asked. He thought for a minute, and then looked me in the eye.

"Today was a good day, Bells."

I knew the truth though; and that was the day I learned that Charlie never had good days anymore. He didn't have one last week he didn't have one the day before and he sure as hell didn't have one that day, like he had just told Edward. He was more than miserable.

"Yes, she's ready. Go." Charlie's voice pulled me from the terrible memory, He wasn't taking no for an answer that night.

"Ok, love you. Call me if you need anything." I walked over to kiss him on his cheek.

"Don't worry about me," he grumbled.

"Well, see you around nine," Edward said as he grabbed my hand.

"Sounds good." Charlie waved us out the door.

When the door shut, Edward turned to me, "So, where do you want to go tonight?" he asked, swinging our hands back and forth.

"Um, someplace close if that's okay. He was lying; it wasn't a good day… not even close."

Edward was the first person that I had been honest with about everything going on at home. I would tell Alice, but Jasper and she had been inseparable since they met. So I hadn't spent as much time with her as I was used to.

We had done a few things with them; Jasper was probably the funniest person I had ever met in my life, and he made Alice so happy. His humor was a nice break from the depressing state of my home. Alice and I had had a couple of girl nights, and she had told me, in way too much detail, how far they had gone. So, I knew that they have done more than Edward and I, but hadn't slept together, at least. Edward had finally opened up to me a little about Jasper's recent past and how he had been with girls.

I could tell that he hadn't wanted to put his friend down or make him sound bad, but he also didn't want my friend to get hurt. I had decided that it wasn't my place to tell Alice, but I encouraged her to talk to him. He had been open with her, and I know that a lot of it was hard for her to take. Apparently, Jasper had been with many girls. They both agreed that they would take their sexual relationship slow. As far as I knew, he had been a gentleman toward her - well as much as Jasper could be. I thought it was really sweet that he stayed with her when they came back to her house and found a broken window. Jasper seemed like a good guy under the wild exterior.

Neither Alice nor I had spoken a word to Em since our confrontation at the hospital. He had made zero attempts to talk to me. The one time I tried, in the school hallway, he told me not to speak to him "until I stopped being stupid".

After that, I was done. I didn't tell Edward, because I didn't want to cause any problems with his family. I knew that he and Emmett were not speaking already, and I didn't want to make it worse.

We continued walking down the hall toward the elevator; Edward's voice took me out of my musings.

"We can definitely stay close. How about the little taco place around the corner?"

I didn't want to disappoint him, but I really didn't want to leave. I knew Charlie would never call if he needed anything. Edward read the look on my face, and could probably tell I didn't want to leave.

"Uh, I heard the hospital cafeteria has some awesome chicken strips," he said with a wink.

This was why I was falling for him; he always knew what to say and do to make me feel better. I broke out into a huge smile.

"You're sure you don't mind?"

"Course not," he said, leaning down and kissing the top of my head.

We walked into the cafeteria, and it wasn't very busy. We looked and the food in the cases, and the only thing that looked edible was, in fact, the chicken strips, so, that's what we got. We sat down, and started talking about our days.

"I dunno, I am just so sick of it, you know?"

He had just finished telling me about his football practice that had not gone too great. He said his dad embarrassed him, but didn't elaborate. I always got confused when he talked about football. When he was with my dad, they could talk for hours about it, and when he talked about playing, he had a spark in his eyes; you could just tell how much he loved it. But there were times, when that light would dim, and he would look… almost sad.

"Edward, can I ask you something?"

"Anything," he said with a smile.

I wanted to ask him, but I was nervous about how he would react. He had never gotten mad at me, but you could tell he just wasn't open about anything when it involved his family life.

"Uh, it just seems that you don't really like to play all that much, sometimes."

"That's not really a question Bella," he said playfully.

I rolled my eyes.

"Ok, here's the deal, I'm really not sure how much you know about my family…" he waited for me to respond, so I let him know that Em was not very open about them.

"Well..." he stopped, running a hand through his hair and took a big breath.

"You have a lot going on, Bella, and I really don't want to burden you with all of my messed up stuff."

I wanted to tell him how much I cared for him and that it was not a burden, but I wasn't sure if he felt the same way about me, and I didn't want to scare him away.

"Edward, really, I want to know." I took a chance, and said, "I really care about you." I held my breath waiting to see how he would react. His head shot up,

"I care about you, too." I swear I heard him add 'too much' under his breath.

"My family…my family, they're screwed up, Bella. I really don't want to drag you into it by telling you everything," he said in a quiet voice.

He was obviously ashamed of whatever happened behind their closed doors. I had heard his dad screaming at him through the phone, and I prayed that he wouldn't say it was true; I was terrified that his dad abused him.

"Edward, please, you don't have to tell me if you don't want. I won't push. However, you can't keep it from me to protect me… I lean on you so much, and I want to be there for you, too."

I really wanted him to understand how much I worried and cared about him.

He let out a huge sigh, and looked around the room; we were pretty much alone. I knew his mom worked at the hospital, and I wondered if it was so bad that he wouldn't want anyone she worked with to know.

"My family is beyond screwed up, Bella. My dad is the biggest... fuc- jerk ever." Even though I didn't mind, Edward always tried not to cuss in front of me. I thought it was a little old fashioned, but he was just that way. It was sweet.

"My mom acts really sweet, but she isn't. She'll do anything she can to keep control of Em and me, even if it's irrational and harmful." He paused, and I had to ask, I had to know so I could try to help him.

"Edward." He looked up and met my eyes. "Does your dad…. um, does he hit you?"

He laughed bitterly.

"Uh, no. A little when I was younger, but now I'm bigger than him, and I wouldn't hesitate to hit him back."

I let out a breath of relief, I knew abuse could come in many forms, but I was glad to hear he wasn't dealing with anything physical. It did, however, make me sick to think of him as a sweet little boy getting hit by his dad.

"He just never wanted me, Bella; it comes down to that."

How could anyone not want him?

"He will yell and stuff at both of us, but he is on my case a lot more than Em's. When he figured out I could play football, and Em couldn't, he started forcing me to play. I love the game but he ruins it; he goes nuts if I don't play perfectly, he shows up at practices and screams at my coach, and at me, in front of the team. I can't quit 'cause if I do he has promised to 'make my life more of a living hell then it is' so I just play." He made air quotes and talked in a low voice, impersonating his dad.

I couldn't believe what I was hearing; this guy was crazy.

"Anyway, I really don't want to get into it all, but the point is, they didn't want me, and I don't want to be there. Em is your friend." I rolled my eyes. Not anymore. "Well, was, or whatever. I don't want to bash him to you, but you need to understand, he will do whatever he can to get me in trouble. He will lie, set me up, anything to get them pissed at me, just so he can float through. It's been that way since we were little. His jealousy has just gotten worse."

My stomach was sick, no wonder Edward was always beating on Em; I would too.

"You probably wanna run don't you?" he asked with a flat laugh.

"Uh, yeah I do. I want to take you and run; I don't want to you go back there."

He let out a breath. "They're assholes, yeah, but there are a lot of people that have it worse, so I can deal with it, and I have been for a long time. I don't want you to worry; you have enough to worry about already."

I rolled my eyes at him. How could I not worry? I wanted to know more, but I could tell he didn't want to go into more detail by his body language, so I let it drop.

We went back into the lobby and sat on what was now "our" purple couch. I was cuddled into his side and he had his arm around me. We were talking about his upcoming game and our faces just kept inching closer and closer to each other. My stomach was twisted into knots I wanted him to kiss me so bad.

"I know we have not been together very long, but… uh, I have never told anyone that stuff about my family, Bella, no one. I really care about you, a lot." My heart was thumping against my chest.

"I care about you, too. So much, Edward. I'm really glad you told me; I want to know everything that goes on in your life." It was true; there was nothing that I didn't want to know about him, even if the news hurt.

"Can I," he paused and cleared his throat; our faces merely inches apart.

"Can I…"

He never finished his sentence, because his lips crashed into mine. His body leaned forward into me and his lips moved against mine. He ran his tongue along my bottom lip and I opened my mouth to allow him entrance. My whole body was on fire. This was my first kiss, I had nothing to compare it to, but it was amazing as far as I was concerned. I slipped my arms around his neck and started to deepen the kiss. Right as I started leaning into him, I felt a vibration in my pocket, then we heard my phone ring. I pulled back, and we looked at each other. Edwards's eyes were hooded with lust and his cheeks were a little pink. I was sure I was bright red. The phone continued to ring.

"Uh," Edward's voice was hoarse, he cleared his throat. "You gonna answer that?" He asked with a laugh. I snapped out of my daze, and answered the ringing phone.

"Hello."

As I answered the phone, I saw Edward shift on the couch, trying to hide the obvious bulge in his pants. I looked away quickly, trying not to embarrass him. The person on the other line was saying my name, and it snapped me out of my visions of Edwards bulge…God.

Shit it was Jake. I listened to everything he said, and my mouth went dry and my stomach turned. When he was done, I hung up the phone and started for the elevators; tears already stinging my eyes.

**EPOV**

Bella just stood up and started jogging to the elevators. I jumped up to follow her, while trying to hide my obvious hard-on I had from our was cuddled into my side, I couldn't help it, and I had to kiss her. But then her phone rang and now she was running from me. What the fuck?

"Bella!" I shouted after her.

She turned to face me; she had gone completely pale. "Edward! Sorry, I have to get up there. That was Jake… my dad… he" She couldn't get the words out; she was having a hard time breathing and was bouncing from foot to foot.

"Calm, down. Okay, breathe," She took two deep breaths and then tried again.

"Dad…my dad. Jake said he like passed out or something. Fuck, Edward, I don't know! They sent him to the main wing of the hospital to see his doctor. I gotta get there!"

I still wasn't sure what was going on, but I asked her what room he was sent to and she didn't know. She was panicking and not thinking the situation over well. I grabbed her hand, getting on the elevator, and then took her to the outpatient wing where we left Charlie. We found his nurse, Jake. He explained what happened; that Charlie had been out of it. He was passing out because his blood pressure, and couldn't be stabilized. I had my arm around Bella and she was clinging to the back of my shirt. Jake gave us the information on where we could find Charlie, so I took Bella there.

By the time we got there, the doctor was already with him, and Charlie looked like he was sleeping. Bella let go of me and ran over to him. She grabbed his hand in hers, then stroked his hairless head with the other. She had tears streaming down her face, and it broke my heart. I felt completely helpless; I had no idea how to help her. I walked over and put a hand on her shoulder; I could feel the silent sobs racking her body.

As soon as she calmed a little, the doctor explained that Charlie was fine; they had him stable. He asked Bella to call her mom and have her come in. I could tell she didn't want to leave her dad, so I kissed her on the top of her head, and let her know I would call her mom for her.

I walked into the hall and took a deep breath. I had grown closer to Charlie in the past month - more then I would ever be with my dad. I was embarrassed to say that this man I hardly knew was the dad I had always wanted. He actually gave a shit about me; he asked me about school and he asked me about my team. He sympathized with me if I had had a bad game, gave me suggestions on how to be better, but never, not once, made me feel like shit. I hated seeing someone so good in such a bad position.

I called Renee - who also had been nothing but nice to me, and loved that Bella and I were together. She said she was leaving work and would be right in. I walked back in, only to find Bella in the same spot I had left her. I just resumed my position behind her, softly rubbing circles on her back.

Renee came in, and I could tell she had cried on the way. I was sure she was scared because its not like I could give her information like a doctor. I could see she was trying to hold it together for Bella. She walked by me and squeezed my arm, giving me a weak smile. I moved aside so she could hug Bella. Not too long after the doctor came in to talk to them, I went to leave the room so they could have privacy.

"Edward, wait." Renee grabbed my arm. "Stay," she said with a smile.

I looked over at Bella; she nodded and added "please". Her voice was so broken. I walked back to her, and resumed the circles on her back.

"So, here's the deal," The doctor, who I learned was Dr. Burke, started. "For some reason, his blood counts are all wrong. We expected them to be down with the chemo, but they are all off. We need to do tests. We'll start them tonight, but won't have any answers until tomorrow, of course. There is no reason to worry tonight; he is just fine. We gave him some medication, that should help him sleep through all of the tests until morning."

After answering some questions from Renee, the doctor left. Renee wanted to stay a little longer, so she pulled me aside, asking me to take Bella home; not wanting her to drive in her condition. After some coaxing, Bella agreed to go with me. She was quiet the whole way home. Once we pulled in, I walked her to the door and went in with her. She was too quiet.

"Bella, sweetheart, are you ok?" I asked, brushing her hair out of her face.

"Yeah, I just…" she took a deep breath, and sat down on the couch "I just have an awful feeling Edward… something's not right; I dunno."

"What do you mean?" I asked, pulling her hand into my lap, and rubbing circles into her palm.

"I dunno, everyone keeps saying that everything's gonna be okay, and I just don't think it is."

With that, she broke down in sobs. I pulled her into my lap and just rocked her back and forth, trying to calm her. The doctors had been very positive in the diagnosis of Charlie, but I didn't blame her for being scared. I sat with her, in silence, for probably a half an hour, with my phone buzzing in my pocket the whole time. It was late, so I knew it was my mom freaking out; Bella was just more important right then.

Even though I was humiliated and worried I would scare her off, it felt so good to tell her about everything. She was the first person I had wanted to let in and know the truth. At the same time, I wanted to protect her from it, too. My parents could be fucking crazy, and I wouldn't put it past them to use her as a pawn to make me do what they wanted me to do. She was so sweet about it all. She just listened and told me how much she cared about me. There was no doubt in my mind; I was falling in love with her… and fast. I almost told her right before I kissed her, but I stopped myself; not wanting to move too fast. She was dealing with so much already. As I was thinking it all through, I noticed the shakes from her crying had stopped. I looked down, and she was fast asleep in my lap.

My phone was buzzing again. I looked at my watch, and noticed it was getting really late. At that same time, the front door opened and a very tired looking Renee walked in. I felt really fucking awkward having my girlfriend's mom walk in with her asleep on my lap.

"Uh, sorry, she uh… was upset, and fell asleep." I tried to explain, so she didn't think I was molesting her daughter in her sleep or some shit.

Renee just waved me off and thanked me for bringing her home. "You know where her room is. Do you think you can get her up there?" Renee asked.

"Sure, no problem."

We were both speaking in whispers, so as to not wake up Bella. Yeah, I knew where Bella's room was, and had very briefly been in. Charlie may like me, but made it perfectly clear that he didn't want me in there. His words were, "I will shoot you if I find you in there alone with her." He had said it kinda like a joke, but made sure I knew he wasn't exactly joking. I didn't blame him.

Renee walked ahead of me, and I carried Bella up the stairs in my arms. She woke a little, but was out of it. She laid her cheek against my shoulder, and I kissed her forehead. Renee pushed her bedroom door open for me, but didn't go in. I guess she was trying to give us some privacy to say goodbye. I was a little surprised; Bella was pretty passed out but… still. I walked in and pulled her blankets down with one hand, but when I went to lay her in bed, her grip tightened around my neck.

"Don't leave," she mumbled sleepily.

I laid her down and took her shoes off; I left her in her clothes and just pulled the blankets up to her shoulders. I leaned over and kissed her lips lightly; nothing like before. I did hope that would be happening a lot more, though.

When I went to leave the room, I barley heard her speak, "Edward." I turned, and she was still fast asleep, so I continued my way to the door.

"Love you." I whipped my head around, and she was completely out.

I wasn't sure if I had heard her right, but it made my heart beat ten times faster.

I walked back over to her, and I couldn't help it; I leaned down and placed another kiss on her forehead, then made my way down the stairs. My phone was going off like crazy, so I answered it at the bottom of the stairs,

"Hello."

My mom, on the other end, went the fuck off; absolutely screaming at me. I tried to explain what happened and tried to apologize. She wouldn't let me speak. She just kept saying how Bella was a "bad influence," and she "is gonna keep me from her." She could fucking try; I found one good thing, and I would be fucked before I let her interfere. There was no way they wouldn't get a fight from me on this one. I was still trying to speak, unsuccessfully, when Bella's mom rounded the corner, holding a cup of what looked like tea.

I was horrified; I knew she could hear my mom screaming on the other end. It's one thing for Bella to know; it's a whole other thing for her mom to witness it. She reached for my phone. I was too stunned to stop her. She took my phone and put it to her ear, but then she pulled it away, 'cause my fucking lunatic of a mother was still screaming.

"Ah, Hello..." she said, holding the phone away from her ear. I could hear the screaming stop. "Hi, this is Renee, Bella's mom. Um yes, I know... No." She was making the oddest facial expressions to whatever my mom was saying on the other end, "No, I'm sorry we kept him out, but it was not his fault… No just wait. He is such a good kid… no he is a sweetie and was helping me."

I couldn't hear what my mom was saying but could hear her voice muffled on the other end. "Well I'm sorry you feel that way, but I don't feel that you should punish the kids; this is my fault. I asked him to drive her home… Well I'm sorry you feel that way Mrs. Masen."

With that she handed the phone back to me. When I put it back to my ear, the only thing my mom said was, "Get home."

When I hung up, I was scared to look at Renee; she saw first-hand what happened when my mom's lovely façade melted away.

"Edward, I am so sorry. I had no idea that you would be in that much trouble for being out late. I would have never have asked you." She had a look of utter shock on her face that someone would react that way over something so little. Welcome to my world.

"No, uh it's okay... happens a lot. Doesn't take much," I said with a nervous laugh; I was humiliated.

I'm sure she wouldn't want Bella with me now that she saw the crazy shit I came from.

"No. No, Edward, it's not okay. I'm calling her in the morning, when she has calmed down. She was very upset, and maybe she will listen better tomorrow."

Then she walked forward and gave me a huge hug. It felt so good, not in a fucking creepy pervy way, but it was so… motherly. My mom never touched me like that. I wasn't used to the affection.

"Thanks, but you really don't have to, they're just… like that," I wasn't sure how to explain it.

"I don't care what's going on Edward; you can come to Charlie and me with anything. If you need help or anything, promise me you will come to us." She had tears in her eyes.

I was shocked at how upset this had made her; she hardly knew me but cared so much. I wasn't used to it. My own parents obviously hated me; I never expected anything different from anyone else. The concern she was showing made my heart constrict; I wasn't sure how to act with her affection, never having received it from my own mother before, so I just gave her a weak smile.

"I promise, thank you."

She gave me another big hug, telling me to get home before it got worse, and promising again to call my mom in the morning. I walked to my car; it wasn't raining, but it was kinda muggy outside for Forks, and smelled very earthy, with all the wet foliage around. I drove home, bracing myself for what I was going to face. I wasn't worried about the screaming; I could handle that. I didn't want her to try to keep Bella and me apart.

When I pulled up, my mom was on the front porch, with Emmett fucking standing behind her with a smug smile on his ugly face. He had not so much crossed my path since the night of our fight; he knew I still wanted to beat the shit out of him, so he stayed out of my way. I got out of the car, and when he saw the look on my face, he scrambled inside. My mom looked like she had calmed down a little. I walked up to her, and she actually let me explain what happened. When I was done all she said was,

"I don't even want to deal with you. Your dad's in bed; I'll let him decide in the morning, after I tell him."

I was honestly happy with that; this had nothing to do with an interference with football, so he'd probably tell me I was worthless or something and let it go. I told her goodnight, and left her on the porch to head up to bed. When I got to my door, Em was standing outside of it.

"What the fuck do you want?" I spat at him.

"Just thought you might want to thank me, you know, for pointing out to Mom that you hadn't come home on time. She was going to bed; didn't even notice you were gone, so I made sure to remind her."

That piece of shit! He would do anything to keep Bella and me apart, and that included getting me in trouble.

"I would beat your piece of shit face in, but then that would keep me from my girlfriend."

His face was turning red with my words.

"So, with that, get the fuck out of my way so I can go to bed." I opened the door and then shut it in his face.

I'm sure he was stunned; he was trying to bait me in a fight, so I would get grounded. That fucker could say whatever he wanted; I wasn't gonna give in that easily.

I fell on my bed, exhausted from the day, and glad there was no school the next day. It was a Friday, but it was teacher work day or some shit; so we had the day off. I fell asleep right as my head hit the pillow.

I woke up the next morning, ready to face whatever I had to with my dad. I took a shower and cleaned up my room a little. Instead of waiting for him to find me, I went and found him. He was working behind the TV, hooking something up; he looked over his shoulder when he heard me come in and then turned back to his project.

"I have had your mother bitching at me all morning for whatever stupid stunt you pulled last night. I don't give a shit who you see, who your stupid friends are, or who you fuck." He stopped and turned to give me eye contact. "But if you let this little girl you're seeing interfere with your football or school, I will cut this shit off so fast your head will spin."

That was that; I said nothing, knowing he wanted to hear nothing. I walked back up to my room and was gonna call Bella to see if she heard anything from the doctor. The phone rang before I could call her. I looked at the screen and her name was flashing.

"Hey, babe."

"Edward."

She was crying; I could hear the trace of hysteria in her voice.

"What's wrong?" I had already started putting my shoes on.

"My dad... it's not good, can you come to the hospital?" she asked, sniffling.

"I'll be right there." I hung the phone up grabbed my keys and headed to the hospital, prepared for the worst.


	11. Chapter 11 Saint Veronica

_**And while the angels sleep all of the devils are awake**_

_**Waiting to steal your love right outside of heaven's gate**_

_**And all the sacred hearts get numb a feeling from the pain**_

_**Cause when the drugs don't work you're gonna curse his holy name**_

_**-Billy Talent**_

**BPOV**

"So that's it, all we can do now is wait."

Dr. Burke had just finished going over everything with us. I couldn't believe it. Had Charlie not gone through enough? As I sat there, I thought about how my day had gone so far, and the events that had led me to be sitting in the same uncomfortable plastic chair, in the same hospital I had sat in months ago, and, once again, having had received bad news. The only thing different that time, was that I had someone sitting next to me holding my hand, being my strength. After I hung up the phone with Edward, he came right away and had not left my side.

I woke in my bed that morning, fully clothed from the night before, not remembering how I had gotten there. The phone was ringing; I jumped out of bed to answer it, but I was too late. Within a minute, my cell started ringing, it was my mom. She said that Dr. Burke had called early that morning and she didn't want to wake me. She said she was coming home to get me and bring me back to the hospital, since I left the truck there the night before. I kept asking her how Dad was, but she wouldn't answer. I jumped up to take a quick shower and threw jeans and a plain long-sleeve gray top on. I just left my hair down and wet, having no time to do anything with it. She picked me up, and was quiet the whole way to the hospital. Her silence was terrifying to me.

After she parked, I followed behind her into the hospital, going to the same room we had been to the night before. As I walked through the lobby, I stared longingly at the purple couch, where Edward and I had shared our first kiss just the night before. It seemed like months ago. I was so happy then, but now I felt completely depressed and in the dark. How could that happen so fast?

I walked into the plain room. It was so quiet; the TV was off and the lights were dimmed. Charlie looked the same as he did the night before; weak, pale and thin, but he was still asleep.

"Bella," Mom said. She reached over and grabbed my hand; we sat down in two chairs next to each other. I just looked at her, waiting for her to continue.

"I, uh, talked to Dr. Burke this morning a bit. He's going to come in soon and explain in more detail, but… but basically the treatment well… hun, it isn't working." I started to cry instantly. What did that mean?

"What do you mean its not working? What he's just gonna die?"

I could feel myself falling into hysterics. This couldn't be happening.

"You need to calm down, sweetie. You're not letting me finish. Dr. Burke said the only way he would overcome this is to have a complete bone marrow transplant. I don't know all the details yet; he will be here soon to explain more. I do know that he already put your dad on the transplant waiting list, first thing this morning."

A transplant. I knew nothing about them except for what I had seen on TV shows, and a lot of times on the shows those people died waiting for a match. I couldn't breathe. It was all just too much. I stood up. I needed air, and I needed it immediately.

"Where are you going?" Mom asked, as I started out of the room.

"I just need a minute, please. Stay here, I really want to be alone," I begged. She needed to stay with her husband, and I needed to lose it alone. She nodded reluctantly, and I fled the room.

I felt like I should have been crying, but the tears wouldn't come. I knew I was walking down the halls of the hospital, but it didn't feel like it. I was in a complete daze; going through the motions, but in my mind I was somewhere else. I was thinking about the day that I found out about his cancer. It seemed like ages ago - years - even though it hadn't been. He had been in so much pain, so miserable. I kept telling myself that it was okay, because even though the chemo was doing awful things to his body, in the end it would make him better. A necessary evil of sorts.

Every time I saw him get sick, every time I would see him too weak to walk up the stairs, every hair that fell off his now bald head, I would tell myself, "Its okay, this means the chemo is working, this means he will be better soon," and now for what? He went through all of that, and it was for shit. Nothing came of it. Now he needed a transplant, or he wasn't going to make it. What the fuck was the point of these past months of pure hell.

I felt cold, and I realized I was outside the hospital. I didn't even remember the elevator, the lobby, or going out the entrance doors. Once again, I felt like I should be crying, but there were no tears, only anger. I was pissed now. All this, all this had been a nightmare, and it was all for nothing. I felt like I wanted to hit something, throw something, I had never felt anger like that in my life. I continued to walk, and ended up walking the perimeter of the hospital, livid the whole time.

I was making my second trip around; the anger started giving in, numbness taking its place. I found a bench and sat down. There was no one around; it was quiet, peaceful. The only sounds were of birds and airplanes that would occasionally fly overhead. I laid my head back and looked up to the sky; it was a beautiful day, actually. The sky was bright blue, with huge, fluffy clouds floating through. It was cold, but not too cold. It felt clean and crisp. I sat there motionless, and I thought, I thought about everything; the past few months replaying in my head like a broken record. I had no idea how much time had passed, but the sound of giggles brought me out of my self-imposed mental torture.

I looked up to see a little girl, about the age of six, walking with a man, who I assumed was her dad. She was small; wearing a cute, pink dress with little, pink boots that matched. She had pretty, long, brown hair that was down and curled on the ends. They were coming from a far parking lot, and were walking around the perimeter, I assumed to get to the front entrance of the hospital. I observed them as they came closer.

He would walk ahead of her pretending that he didn't know she was there, then she would sneak up behind him and either scream "Boo!" or do something to get his attention. He would clutch his heart, and scream, acting like she truly snuck up on him and terrified him. She would then burst into a fit of giggles, and he would pick her up, spin her around in circles, and maybe tickle her, before the game would start all over again. She was the image of pure happiness and innocence.

As I watched them, I felt the anger, that had faded into numbness, now turn into searing red pain. It hurt to watch, it hurt to remember. These two reminded me of my Dad and me, and it hurt to know that he was now upstairs, fighting for his life. I couldn't hold back the tears that came rushing to my eyes; they silently flowed down my cheeks. The two were close enough to me now to notice. I tried, but couldn't find it in me to be embarrassed of my emotional display. It just hurt to bad to care. I closed my eyes, waiting and wanting them to pass. I didn't want to see their happiness when mine had crumbled. I felt a tap on my knee, and I opened my eyes to see two bright blue ones staring back.

"Are you okay, lady?" the little girl asked, with big innocent eyes.

I couldn't speak without letting out a sob, and I didn't want to frighten her, so I just nodded.

"Here," she said, shoving a sucker in my face. "My daddy always gives me these when I cry, and the tears stop like that." She emphasized her words with a little clap. She leaned in and whispered, "Daddy says they're like magic; you can't be sad when you have one, you just can't," she added, shrugging her shoulders, clearly amazed by her own story.

The innocence of this little girl was outstanding to me; I would do anything to see the world that way again. She stood there, expectantly staring at me.

"Thank you," I tried to speak up, but it came out in a very small whisper.

"Addie, leave the nice young lady alone; your grandma is waiting for us. C'mon"

I looked up, and the man gave me a smile and a nod of his head, communicating sympathy through his actions. She ran off. When she neared her dad, he bent down, she jumped on his back, and he carried her piggy-back toward the entrance. Even though they left my line of sight, I could still hear her innocent giggles.

After they were gone, and everything had gone quiet again, I broke down. I didn't know what to do, but I knew I needed to get it together before I walked back inside Charlie's room. I kept trying to take deep breaths, to calm down, and to think of other things, but my thoughts kept going back to Edward. He made me happy; he made me feel calm. So, I did the only thing that I knew would calm me, I called him.

Of course he made it here in record time. I was sitting in the lobby, on our couch waiting for him, and he almost ran past me toward the elevators. He looked disheveled, obviously worried. He was wearing dark jeans and a black t-shirt.

"Edward!" He skidded to a stop, and turned and saw me. He said nothing, just walked over and wrapped me in a hug. He could tell I didn't want to talk down here, so he grabbed my hand, and we went up together. As we made our way there, I told him what I knew so far.

"I'm so sorry, baby." He grabbed me, and held me so tight. I breathed in his smell, and let my mind focus on only his touch, which almost instantly calmed me. I knew, at that moment, I could never live without him. We hadn't been together very long, but I knew, without a doubt, I loved him.

We walked into the room, and my Mom was surprised that Edward was there. They seemed to be having a silent conversation with their eyes. She didn't seem to mind that he came, but asked him if it was okay for him to be there. He reassured her that it was fine that he was there. I thought it odd that she would ask that, but I didn't bother asking them about it.

Not five minutes later, Dr. Burke came in the room. All three of us were sitting in hospital-issued plastic chairs. Charlie was still asleep. The doctor left the room briefly, and then returned wheeling in a little stool to sit down in front of us. He looked tired; I saw dark circles under his eyes. He took his glasses off and rubbed his eyes; he put them back on and took a deep breath.

"Guys, here's the deal; The cancer is just too strong for the chemo. His body is fighting and he is fighting, but the cancer is winning right now."

I was out of tears, so I just listened, trying to absorb the information being thrown my way.

"I don't want you to lose hope. Because of his age and great health otherwise, he has been moved up pretty high on the list."

My mom let out a sigh of relief.

"I have him on medication to keep him asleep so his body can rest; we have to keep him on the chemo until the transplant, in order to keep things in check. Now, Renee, besides the donor list, is there anyone that could be a match for him? Siblings, parents, that sort of thing?" She let out a big sigh.

"No, no one. He has no siblings and both of his parents are dead."

I was trying to rack my brain to think of anyone, and the answer was so obvious.

"I'll do it, test me," I demanded. I'm his daughter; I would have to be a match.

"Well, Bella, that is sweet of you to offer, but children generally aren't matches because you have so much of the other parent's DNA. But, listen, guys. Charlie doesn't have a rare blood type, and he is close to the top of the list. I can't promise, of course, but I bet within a month we'll have a match," he said, sounding very confident.

What other choice did I have but to believe him? Edward grabbed my hand, giving me a reassuring squeeze.

"So that's it, all we can do now is wait," the doctor said, standing up. Right before he left the room, he tuned and added, "I know you guys worry and want to stay, but the best thing for him is to rest. Go home, take care of yourselves, and come back tomorrow." He gave us a smile, and then left the room.

I looked over at my Dad, lying in the hospital bed; the doctor was right, he just needed to rest. My mom agreed, and we packed up. We planned on just going home to let everything sink in. I assured Mom and Edward that I was fine to drive, and we headed to the parking lot.

"Do you want to come over?" I asked Edward, as we were nearing our cars.

"If you want me to, if you want to be alone, I understand," I did want to be alone - with the exception of him. I really wanted him with me.

"I would really like it if you came over," I said, with a weak smile.

"Okay, I'll follow you home."

He leaned down and kissed my forehead, then he walked me over to Charlie's truck and opened the door for me. Mom had already left, heading home, I assumed. I pulled the truck out, and headed in the same direction.

**EPOV**

Shit, I felt so bad for Bella and her mom. I really didn't know what to do for her, except hold her hand and be there for her. I got in my car and followed her to her house. When I pulled up I saw her truck, but not her mom's car. I got out of my car, and met Bella on the steps, as she unlocked the door.

"Where's your mom?" I asked.

"She called me. She was gonna go grocery shopping; it's hard for her to sit still when she gets stressed. It's better that she stays busy, keeps her mind off things."

That made sense, I guess. We walked in and just plopped down on the couch. There was some movie on TV, but I could tell Bella wasn't really paying attention to it.

"How are you?" I asked. I was really worried about her; she was too quiet. No tears, no talking.

"I'm Okay, actually. The doctor seemed confident."

I agreed with her; he did. She explained how she was feeling before she called me. I understood why she was angry; I would be fucking pissed too. I was really glad that she felt like she could open up to me. We sat on the couch and talked, and I even got her to laugh a little. She called Alice to give her an update. I could tell that Alice was offering to come over but Bella declined, saying she was fine.

It seemed like her mom had not told her what happened when I left last night, and I was thankful. It was a little awkward when I came in the hospital room earlier. I knew Renee had followed through and called my mom that morning, but I had no idea how it went or what was said. I was happy that it seemed that she didn't tell Bella about the embarrassing moment.

Bella looked really tired. I was sure she was worn out from all the emotions she had gone through that day. She laid her head in my lap, and I lazily played with the soft strands of her hair as we talked. My phone was in my pocket, and I'm sure wasn't comfortable to lie on, so I took it out and set it on the coffee table that me feet were propped up on.

After an hour or so, Renee came in. She said she was fine and just wanted to watch a movie in her room. I could tell that Bella was worried about her. I loved having Bella on my lap, but I really fucking had to piss and couldn't hold it any longer. I told her I needed to use the restroom, and she jumped up to let me go.

I went to do my business, and when I came back, Bella was on my phone.

"Uh, no, Mrs. Masen, that should be fine… oh, okay, four? No, no that should be fine. Okay, bye." She hung up and looked at me sheepishly.

"Uh, sorry, I answered your phone, it was ringing… I didn't even think of it, it was reflex…..uh…it was your Mom. I just picked it up, sorry." She was rambling on.

"No, it's cool… uh, what'd she want?" I had no idea what my mom would have to say to Bella.

"She was calling to see when you where going to be home, but she invited me to dinner tomorrow and to your football game."

What the fuck what was she trying to pull? She didn't know much about the drama between Em and Bella, but she knew they weren't friends anymore because Bella was with me. There also was no fucking way I wanted her in the same room with my dad.

"No way; not happening." Her face fell, and I immediately felt like an asshole.

"Bella, no… I would love to have you there, I just don't want you around my dad, and I am sure you don't want to have dinner with Emmett," I tried to explain.

"Edward, I should have asked you first before I told her I would come, but she said your dad was leaving town tonight, and she didn't want to go to the game alone. Emmett, well honestly, I couldn't care less; he is doing this, not me. But, if you don't want me there, I really do understand," she said looking down.

"No, no. Of course I want you there. You sure you want to see me play? It gets cold out there. I'd love to have you come, but you don't have to go to dinner if you're uncomfortable."

I knew my mom, she would play very sweet and nice with Bella, but it would all be fake.

"No, if we're gonna be together, I want to spend time with your mom. She was nice to me on the phone. Like I said, Em will just have to deal," she said, walking forward and kissing my lips.

Damn, it felt good. I deepened the kiss, and she moaned in my mouth; I got an instant hard-on. I didn't have experience with girls, and I really hope that Bella had none with guys, but whatever I was doing, she seemed to like. We ended up making out on the couch, with me on top of her. I was trying hard not to, but I knew I was rubbing my dick on her leg. She felt so good underneath me. She had her hands around my neck, but I kept mine above her on the armrest of the couch; not only to keep my weight off of her, but also to keep myself from roaming my hands all over her body. I didn't want to move too fast with her.

The next thing I knew, I heard a throat clearing. We both flew off the couch like it was on fucking fire, and ran to opposite sides of the room. I looked over at Bella, and she was bright red.

"Okay, you two, I was sixteen before, I'm not dumb. But do me a favor, no stacking; it leads to more." That's all Renee said with humor in her voice as she started to walk out of the room.

"Stacking?" Bella asked looking over at me confused. I couldn't help it, I started laughing at the humiliating position we got our selves into.

"Uh… I think she was referring to uh…our position on the couch." She still looked a little confused. "You know uh, stacking…me on top of you."

Her eyes widened with understanding. We were lucky it was Bella's mom and not mine. She would have shipped me off if she saw that shit, even though we were just kissing.

After that, I decided I should head home. I promised Bella I would pick her up the next day, and gave her a chaste kiss this time - I didn't attack her like a horny motherfucker. As embarrassed as I was, I still went into the kitchen to say goodbye to Renee.

"Goodbye, Edward," she said with a smile; her expression letting me know she was not pissed at me; she just didn't want a front row show to our make out sessions. Fair enough.

I headed home after that, wondering how the next day was going to go.

I had been glad that my dad was leaving when I got home the night before,, so he didn't have time to give me his normal two hour "night before the game" lecture. All he had time to say was, "Just don't fuck up and embarrass me." I just told him, "Okay." and headed to my room, as he walked out the door. Good fucking riddance.

My mom seemed to be in a good mood when I got up this morning. She was already planning the dinner with Bella; she actually seemed excited about it.

"So, Edward, what do you think Bella would prefer; chicken or salmon?"

My mom always tried to put on a show for people - give the image that we were the perfect family. I wanted to believe that she genuinely wanted to get to know my girlfriend, so I was trying really hard to give her the benefit of the doubt.

"Uh, I'm not sure mom. I think she would like either one. She isn't picky."

She was sitting at the dining room table, with two recipes in front of her.

"Well, I have made this salmon one before, and know it's good, so, we'll go with that, I guess," she said, more talking to herself.

"Great, thanks for cooking. I'm gonna go finish my list before I get Bella." She just nodded, still concentrating on dinner, I guess. My dad left me a list the size of a fucking novel, of shit I had to get done. Em had already left getting whatever he needed to get done, done. Em never went to my games, but I figured he would be there for dinner, and I was planning on warning that fucker about how he treated Bella before she showed up.

The last thing I did on my list was mow the lawn. I was sweaty and grimy from all the shit I did. I ran upstairs to shower really fast; I only had twenty minutes before I needed to get Bella. The hot water felt so good. I just stood under the spray letting it relax my muscles. As I stood there, I started thinking about our kiss the night before, and my body started reacting to it immediately. Knowing I had no time to take care of my…uh…situation, I turned the water to cold and that solved the problem. I was in the shower too long and was running late; I threw jeans and t-shirt on real fast and ran out of my room. Right as I headed out of the house, I saw Em's jeep pull up. I walked over to it, and he rolled his window down.

"Bella's coming to dinner tonight. I don't give a shit if you two talk; I'm not gonna tell her who she can and can't talk to, but I have a pretty strong feeling that you've given her shit at school and she doesn't tell me about it just to save your ass. But if I see you do anything tonight… if you so much as breathe a goddamn disrespectful breath in her direction, I will beat your ass."

He said nothing back. He just stared at me like the big fucking idiot that he was.

"Okay. Well, I'll see you soon." I turned, leaving the stunned idiot in his car, and made my way to mine to pick up Bella.

When I pulled up, Bella was already waiting on the steps of her house. She was wearing jeans and some kind of girlie blue top. She looked really nice. I jumped out and ran over to open the door for her. When she reached the car, she stood on her toes to give me a kiss.

"Hi," she said, with a sweet smile.

"Hey, how are you doing today?" She looked good, no signs that she had been crying or anything.

"Good, I'm really good," she replied, as she sat in the car. I shut her door and ran and got in on my side.

"So, they let my dad wake up today, and they told him the news," she said, kinda quietly.

"Really… how'd he take it?" I was scared to ask, because I didn't want to upset her.

"Really good. Better than Mom or me," she said, shaking her head in disbelief. She added with a laugh, "He just said to the doctor, 'Okay, well, why are you standing here? Go find me one.'," she relayed, in her "Charlie" voice. I laughed. I could see Charlie saying something like that.

"He was really positive about it all, I was really surprised. I thought that the news would crush him; he's been through so much."

"He's strong, Bella." I wasn't sure what else to say. She looked over at me and smiled.

"So, are you hungry?" I asked, trying to lighten the mood a little before we got there.

"Uh…I'm pretty nervous. I felt all brave yesterday, but now I'm freaking out." I didn't want her to be nervous.

"Don't be. My mom is really excited that your coming, and don't worry about Em. I think he's over it." She gave me a questioning look, so I added. "Okay. well I don't know if he's over it, but he won't bug you tonight, I promise."

"What did you do?" she asked, in an accusing voice.

"I didn't 'do' anything. I just don't think he'll bug you," I said giving her a big smile. I knew that she knew I was lying, but thankfully I was pulling up to the house and she had no more time to question me.

When I opened the door for her. and she got out, her eyes went wide. I guess we had a nice house, but I never really cared about it.

"Wow, your house is like, really nice. Edward."

I just shrugged my shoulders. taking her hand and walking up to the front door. When we entered. I could smell dinner coming from the kitchen.

"Hello." My mom rounded the corner, with her apron on, looking like something out of a fifties show. "Hi, Bella. I'm so glad you could come tonight. I hate sitting at those games all by myself," she said, with a big smile.

"Thank you for inviting me, Mrs. Masen. You have a beautiful home."

My mom just smiled and offered to take her coat. She never told Bella to call her by her first name, like both her parents had done for me. My mom liked to remind people who was in charge.

"Well, I hope you're hungry. We weren't sure what you liked. I made salmon. I hope that's okay," Mom said, as we made our way to the dining room.

"I love salmon, thank you."

As soon as Bella and I sat down, Emmett walked into the room. I could feel the tension and awkwardness rolling off both of them. I was sitting next to Bella, and Emmett sat across from her, next to our mom.

"Hi, Em," she said, trying to break the awkward tension.

"Hey," was all he said back. After that, we all ate, and overall it went well. Emmett didn't say another word and left the table early. I made sure to not touch Bella too much at dinner. I may not like my brother, but I also wasn't out to hurt him all the time, like he was to me.

"Thanks, Mrs. Masen, that was so good," Bella said, as she started to help clear the table.

"Oh, I'm so glad you liked it. We'll have to make this our little tradition before Edward's football games."

I really appreciated my mom being so nice, but I still didn't like the idea of Bella being around my dad; he would make no attempt to be nice.

I helped them take the dishes to the kitchen, and then realized I needed to head to the school to meet the guys for the game. I had forgotten to tell her I couldn't drive her there and back. The coach started a mandatory thing where we had to all meet at the school and drive to the game together in a bus; build team bonding or some shit. It was stupid.

I pulled Bella aside to explain to her, and she took it great. She seemed a little nervous about being alone with my mom, but just gave me a kiss on the cheek and wished me good luck on my game. I said goodbye to my mom and got ready to head out. When I was leaving, I heard my mom telling Bella she didn't wear warm enough clothes and that she would bring blankets for them to stay warm. I felt a sense of relief knowing that, for now, my mom was gonna play nice, and with not having to worry, I could just focus on the game. Em was taking the trash out when I was leaving, and we had to walk right past each other for me to get to my car.

"Hey, Emmett, thanks."

He just nodded, and I jumped in my car.

The game went great; we kicked their asses. Every time I made a good play or a touchdown, I would look into the stands to see Bella clapping and shouting with my mom. It was freezing, and they had blankets wrapped around them like most of the people in the stands. It felt really great to see her up there. I knew from our past conversations, that she knew nothing about the game, but wanted to support me just the same. My mom was usually like that at games; it was a nice change to see her with Bella up there and not my dad. He would sit up there, with his arms crossed over his chest, scowl on his face the whole time, showing no emotion until I screwed up.

About halfway through, I was surprised to see Alice and Jasper sitting next to Bella. Jasper had come to the games before, so I guess it wasn't that weird. I was glad that Bella's friend showed up. Even though she and mom were getting along good, it was probably still a little awkward.

The bus ride back was loud; all of the guys were screaming and congratulating each other. They were all planning parties for after the game, but all I wanted to do was to get home to see Bella. Right when we got back to the school, I threw my pads and gear in the trunk and headed home. I saw my mom's car in the driveway. They probably got there about a half an hour before me. When I walked in the door, Bella jumped on me.

"Congratulations, Edward! You did so awesome!"

It was cute how excited she was.

"Thanks," I said, leaning down to give her a small kiss.

I wanted to talk to her, but I was gross from the game and really needed a shower.

"Hey, are you going to be okay if I take a quick shower? Then I can take you home." I asked.

I didn't see my mom, and I wasn't sure if maybe she had had enough of her for one night.

"No, I can wait. Take your time. Your mom was just showing me her craft room."

"Well, that could take forever then," I joked with her.

"I'll be right down," I said, as I ran up the stairs.

My phone rang as I was about to get in the shower. It was my dad. He had me on the phone for fifteen minutes, grilling me about the game. I told him how great it went and all he had to say was that he would, "check in with my coaches and then decide if it was a good game or not."

Whatever. I couldn't give a fuck, I just wanted off the phone, so I could get in the shower and get back down to Bella.

When I was finished, I found her with my mom, in the craft room, going over some pattern.

"You, uh, ready to go?" I asked, peeking my head around the corner.

"Yeah."

She thanked my mom one more time, then headed to my car with me.

We talked the whole way back to her house. I guess Alice had wanted her to hang out, because Jasper was going to the football game, and she didn't want to go. She changed her mind when she found out Bella was there. I guess Kate and a few other skanks tried to come on to Jasper right in front of Alice. Bella said he just put his arm around Alice and told them to "fuck off". I was really happy that Jasper was trying so hard with Alice. He must have really liked her. None of us had gotten to hang out much that week, so they made plans for us to hang out together the the following weekend.

Even though Bella was a happy person, I knew all stuff with her dad had been hard on her. I was glad that she had a good time, and that she got to spend some time with her friend. I was nervous about her coming to my game at first, but now I just hoped that there wouldn't be a game she would miss.

~*E&B*~

A few weeks had gone by since the game, and they had been great. My coach gave a great review to my dad, and he had been off my case for the most part. My mom continued to keep her craziness at bay. Bella had been good. They had let her dad come home to wait for the transplant, but there was still no news. They continued to stay optimistic.

Bella had come to both of my spring games, since the first one; Charlie even came to one. I couldn't believe it with how sick he was. He sat between Bella and Renee and cheered me on with them. He couldn't stay the whole time, but I didn't think he knew how much it meant that he came at all. I went to their house after the game, and we had a long conversation about it. He never gave me shit; it was so nice to talk to a dad that was supportive and encouraging. He would say things like, "Well, that was a stupid play" or, "What a bullshit call!" But never tell me I was "worthless" or a "fucking failure" like my dad. I had grown close to Bella's family, and even though they were going through the worst time in their lives, they were a hundred times more functional than my fucked up family.

Bella and her mom had some event at her school, so I offered to take Charlie in for his treatment. I was walking to my next class, thinking about what I wanted to bring with me to entertain myself, when Jasper ran up to me, grabbing my arm, and almost knocking me over. He looked panicked.

"What the fuck, Jazz? What's wrong?" God, I had never seen him act anything but cool and collected.

"Uh... man its Bella."

What the fuck did he mean?

"What do you mean? What the fuck did you do to her?" I demanded, stepping aggressively toward him.

He was my friend, but at that moment, I didn't give a fuck.

"Shit, back down, Edward!" he said, stepping back. "I didn't do shit to her. I was out by the street, smoking a cigarette, and I saw her walking up the street, crying uncontrollably." I probably still looked like I was going to hit him, so he quickly continued, "Look, Edward, I have no idea what happened; she wont talk. Dude, she walked all the way here from her fucking school." I stepped back from him.

"Well, where the hell is she?" I asked, tired of standing there talking to him.

"She didn't want to come in here, obviously, so I put her in my car, and I told her I would come to get you. She was just gonna wait outside until you were done with practice; saying some shit about not getting you, 'cause you can't miss football because of your dad?" I still had not let Jazz know about my dad. "I don't know, she isn't making sense."

I didn't want to hear anymore, I just wanted to find her. I shoved my books and shit into his arms, and ran toward the parking lot. I spotted Jasper's car next to mine. Bella was hunched over in the passenger seat, and she looked like she had been to hell and back. What little makeup she did wear, was smeared on her face, and her hair was all fucked up. I ripped the door open, and her head shot up. She started crying so hard, and threw herself at me. I grabbed her and held her. She was freezing from walking the whole way. I was squatting down in front of the door, and it was fucking uncomfortable, so I pulled her up and sat down in the passenger seat, with her on my lap. I kept asking her what happened, but she wouldn't answer.

"Is it your dad, Bella? Did something happen to him?" I really hoped that Charlie was still okay. She shook her head "no" and I was relieved instantly. I had seen her cry before, but not like that. That was scaring me. Those were not tears of sadness; it seemed like she was scared and panicked.

She opened her mouth and tried to speak, but then closed it again. Jasper came up to the car, with a bottle of water, and gave it to her. She drank the whole thing. While she was drinking, Jasper said that he talked to Alice and she didn't know what happened; just that Bella never showed up to lunch. When she was done, she looked at me with big sad eyes.

"Bella, what happened?" I could hear the desperation in my own voice. She looked like she was going to finally tell us.

"Emmett he…he," she started to say, and then broke crying again. I saw red. It didn't matter what she was going to say; whatever he did, he was going to pay for it and he was going to pay now.


	12. Chapter 12 Covered in Cowardice

_**Cowards that hide behind their words**_

_**Don't care whose feelings will get hurt**_

_**Their eyes are blinded by their rage**_

_**Beware the voice without a face**_

_**When your insecure, they'll find the fuel to start a fire**_

_**They're pent up pricks with only hatred to inspire**_

_**Level heads prevail, revenge won't make it better**_

_**Trust your instinct like you trust what's in the mirror**_

_**-Billy Talent**_

**BPOV**

"Edward, no! Stop! Please, stop!" I heard myself screaming at him.

He had found Emmett and was on top of him hitting him repeatedly. Jasper was on Edward's back, trying to pull him off, but Edward was just too strong. Emmett tried to fight back, but it was no use; it was obvious that Emmett had no idea how to fight, but Edward was well practiced at it.

"Edward, man, that's fucking enough! Get off! Dude, get off!" Jasper was yelling at him and finally was able to peel him off Emmett, but only because Edward let him.

He was holding Edward back by his arms. Em was on the floor, his face was bloody and swollen, his lip was split and it looked like he had a cut by his eye. He was rolling on the floor holding his ribs, where Edward had kicked him repeatedly. I looked over at Edward and he was bright red and breathing heavily.

"You feel like a man, you piece of shit? Huh? You put Bella through hell you fucker! I'm abusive? Really, I'll show you fucking abusive!"

After he said that, he lunged forward, ready to attack again. I screamed and lunged forward to get between them; I grabbed him by the front of his shoulders, while Jasper still had him from behind. I finally got him to make eye contact with me. I could tell he was seeing red.

"Edward, you have to calm down, okay?" I was pleading with him to stop.

"Let Jasper take you outside so you can calm down," He looked at me and shook his head.

"There is no fucking way I am leaving you with him in here," he spat looking down at Em, who was still on the floor groaning.

"Okay, fine. Someone needs to look him over, Jazz could you?"

Jasper nodded that he would, and I decided that I would go outside with Edward. We stepped out, and I could tell the fresh air helped to calm him. I didn't know what to think, I knew that Edward wouldn't let this go, and honestly I didn't expect him to. Not only did Emmet do something to me, and Edward was very protective, but really he did it to Edward. What he said could ruin Edward's reputation. I didn't expect to see Edward lose it like that, though. I looked over at Edward, and he was still breathing heavily. He wasn't hurt, but his shirt was stretched and ripped, either from Em in the fight or from Jasper pulling him off, I wasn't sure which. He spit on the ground and then turned to me.

"Bella, I'm sorry you have gotten dragged into all of this. I never... never should have started a relationship with you."

His words burned through me and it hurt.

"What are you trying to say?"

He looked at me, and all I saw was pain in his eyes.

"This!" he yelled, waving his arm towards the entrance of the house, "My family! I don't want you to be dragged into this mess with them."

"Edward… do you want to be with me or not?" I had to know.

"Of course I do, Bella, I just can't stand to see you having to deal with all of this crap!"

He looked as sad as I felt. He walked over and sat next to me on the front step.

"Edward, you just turned seventeen. You only have your senior year left. Yes, this sucks, and I hate that you're stuck here, but we can get through it."

He had to know I wasn't going anywhere; this was a small amount of time in our lives, and soon he could leave and we could move on. His birthday had just passed the week before with no fan fair. I had made him a cake and dinner, but I don't think his family celebrated it with him. I had learned then, exactly what he meant when he had said his parents didn't want him. He told me the whole story and it broke my heart.

"Bella… I just want you to know… I know it's fast but… I love you." he said, looking me directly in my eyes.

All I saw was love shining through. My heart was beating so hard against my chest. I had felt that way for a while; I couldn't believe that he loved me back.

"Oh Edward, I love you so much."

The most beautiful smile graced his face and he leaned forward and kissed me. We were kissing, and I crawled on his lap, straddling him. We had made out before, but never like this. I could feel him hard against my center, and it was doing crazy things to my body. We were probably getting too into it, when the door opened and Jasper walked out. I quickly slipped off Edward's lap and back on the step, embarrassed that we were caught, once again.

"Whoa! Nothing like a little afternoon delight after a beat down, eh Eddie?" Jasper said wiggling his eyebrows.

"Shut up, Jazz" Edward mumbled.

"Is he ok?" I was pretty sure that Edward hadn't caused any serious trauma, but I still didn't want Em hurt.

"Psh, yeah, he'll be fine. You got some good blows in, but he'll be fine," Jasper said dismissively.

Edward just shrugged. I had a feeling that whatever little of brotherly relationship Edward and Emmett did have, was now over. I felt bad for my part in that situation, but it ran deeper than me; Em would have found some way to attack Edward, with or without me.

As we sat on the porch, everyone was quiet, processing what had just occurred. I thought about the day and how it had seemed to go on forever, and the events that led us three to be sitting there right then.

* * *

Everything started at school; I had been in a good mood, thinking about the past weeks.

It had been around three weeks since I went to that first football game to watch Edward play. It was awesome to see him down there on the field, although I was scared about him getting hurt. Every time he got knocked down or tackled, whatever you call it, he would just jump right back up. He would get the ball and run down the field; he was so fast.

The dinner with his mom was nice too. She had been very kind to me all night, but I couldn't shake the feeling that it wasn't totally sincere. I had just let the feeling go and decided to enjoy myself. Since the game, I had been to a couple others and he had done so well. I couldn't imagine why his dad would get mad at him. I had yet to spend anytime with the man; Edward did whatever he could to keep me away from him. My dad, however, had tried to come to one of Edward's games. He couldn't stay the whole time, but I could tell how proud he was of Edward. The next few days, he kept saying how good he was and how much potential he had.

Emmett, until that particular morning, had still been ignoring me, but he would make sure to shoot me dirty looks in the halls. I had been on my way to lunch when things went bad. I just had to drop some stuff off at my locker. I was shocked to see Emmett standing next to it waiting for me. I had thought that maybe he decided he was ready to work out the problem between us, but before I could even say hi, he cut me off.

"Still with Edward?" he asked sourly.

I just nodded. He shook his head in disbelief, and walked away, bitterly laughing under his breath. I thought that it was freaking weird. I decided to just ignore him. I had put my stuff away and then was going to meet Alice; my head was shoved in my locker when someone cleared their throat behind me. It was the principal, Mr. Banner.

"Isabella, I need to see you in my office right away," he had requested, with nothing but seriousness in his voice.

Dread had sped through me, and I the only thing I could think of was Charlie. Wanting to know what had happened, I followed him to his office. When I walked in, Mrs. Cope, the school nurse, was already in there. I couldn't figure out why she would need to be there. Mr. Banner shut the door behind him, and then walked over to sit behind his desk. Mr. Banner had a modest office, a couple bookshelves and a desk, that was about it.

"Isabella, can you have a seat?" He asked, motioning toward the chair across from him.

My whole body was trembling in fear of what he was about to say. I was terrified that he was going to tell me my dad died. I can't tell you how relieved I had been when he opened his mouth, and that wasn't what came out. But what he did say, shocked the hell out of me.

"Isabella." He took a deep breath; he was having a hard time meeting my eyes with his own, and Mrs. Cope, well, she looked… I dunno… sad? Angry?

"There has been a very serious accusation made, and by law we have to look into it." Accusation what kind of accusation? I'm sure I had confusion written all over my face.

"Do you know what I'm referring to?" he asked, finally looking at me.

"No, sir, I have no idea." My head was spinning, trying to figure out what it could be.

"Someone has come forward and let me know that you are involved in a very abusive and controlling relationship."

What. The. Fuck?

"What are you talking about?" I had almost jumped out of my chair.

"Are you not dating an," he looked down at a paper in front of him, and continued, "Edward Masen?" he asked me.

"I am, but he is in no way whatsoever abusive or controlling, Mr. Banner"

I couldn't believe this. I had been trying to think who the hell would say something like that about Edward, and then I knew exactly who.

"Did Emmett tell you this?" His head shot up giving it away. Bingo.

"I'm sorry, Isabella, but the student's identity is confidential."

I was fuming and it only got worse. It had to be Emmett, no other "student" there even knew Edward, besides Alice, and she would never lie like that.

"Now, the student said that they have seen the abuse first hand, and they were sure that there would be marks on you. Is this true, does he hit you?"

I was pissed and it had showed; I couldn't control my temper. How could they believe his lies?

"NO! He has never, ever once hurt one damn hair on my head. I talk to whomever I please and do whatever I please. Edward is nothing but a gentlemen; Emmett is lying. He is jealous, and he's lying!"

I was on the verge of screaming when Mr. Banner put up his hand, signaling for me to stop yelling at him, I guess.

"That may all be true…" I went to interject that it "was fucking true", when he stopped me again. "But when your parents enrolled you into this school, they signed an agreement stating that when a student is in an emergency situation we must handle it. We are a private institution, and I'm afraid that this falls under that category."

I didn't have a clue what he was talking about. I know we had signed a ton of stuff when I started there, but had no idea what he was planning on doing.

"If I felt the accusation was true, the police would be here already, but with everything you have gone through, I didn't want to do that without speaking to you first." He acted as if he was doing me a fucking favor. Call the cops, Em is lying.

"So, we have two options here, Bella; I can call the authorities, and they can go get Mr. Masen to question him, so they can decide if the accusations are true or not."

I had started panicking. They couldn't do that to Edward! He had done nothing wrong.

"Or, you can let Mrs. Cope look you over for marks and bruises; if she finds nothing on your body, I will not call the authorities, but if she does, I will be calling right away. Either way, I will contact your parents, and they can handle this however they wish. I tried to call them this morning, but I couldn't get a hold of them."

"They were at a doctor's appointment this morning,"

They had been meeting about a possible donor; that was supposed to be a happy day. I had felt like a goddamn criminal. I was going to have to be looked over, because my boyfriend's brother was a jealous psycho.

"How do you want to handle it?"

I had no choice, there was no way in hell I was letting them have cops drag Edward out of school and into questioning. I was sure that was exactly what Emmett wanted.

"Mrs. Cope." My throat had sounded hoarse, and then I was the one that couldn't meet their eyes.

"I really am sorry, Isabella, and I hope that what I was told isn't true."

I had nothing to say. I had already told them it wasn't true. I stood up, with Mrs. Cope following me, and headed to the nurses office. When I had stepped out of the principal's office, Emmett was standing by the door. I wasn't backing down from him. I walked over to him, and I could hear Mrs. Cope trying to stop me, but I didn't give a shit.

"Did you do this?" I had demanded; my voice sounded scary, even to my own ears.

He said nothing back; he just stood there shame all over his face.

"Fuck you, Emmett," I spat as viciously as I could.

"Bella, that's enough. Let's go," Mrs. Cope said, as she gently grabbed my arm and led me away. As I walked away, I kept eye contact with him as long as I could.

I had followed Mrs. Cope into the tiny nurse's room. It was a room the size of a closet behind the secretary's office. There was a bright light and a cot, and on one wall there was cabinet with a sink. I walked in and slammed myself down on the cot, anger radiating off me.

"Okay, Bella, I am so sorry we have to do this, and I want to make it as painless as possible for you."

I just huffed in response, crossing my arms and rolling my eyes. I had felt a little bad for being rude; it wasn't Mrs. Cope's fault, and she hadn't had a choice in the matter. She was an average woman - a working mom. She was always so nice and nurturing to all the students; everyone saw her as their mom away from home when they were sick at school. But not that day, that day she had been my enemy.

"I will step out for a minute, just strip to your bra and underwear and put this on."

She handed me a hospital-type gown. That was when it had hit me; this was really happening. She stepped out of the room, and I began peeling my sweater and jeans off. I could feel the hot tears rolling down my cheeks. Tears of anger, tears of humiliation. I had never felt my privacy so violated. I left my socks on and was wearing a bra and underwear that didn't match, I didn't think of coordinating because I wasn't planning on stripping for anyone today, I had thought, bitterly.

When I had finished, I sat down on the cot; the more I thought about the situation I was in, the angrier I got. I wanted to tear Emmett limb from limb. How could he do that? I was his best friend once. Even though he was hurt, this was unreal. Who would lie about something like this - especially against their own flesh and blood? As I was stewing over that, there was a timid knock on the door, and Mrs. Cope came back in.

"Ok, honey, let's get this done as fast as possible," she said, handing me a tissue to wipe my tears, but I made no attempt to take it from her.

She gave me a look of sympathy and set the tissue on the counter. She had me stand up, and she walked around me, pulling at the gown, inspecting different places on my body; she focused on my back, ribs, and the backs of my legs. I figured those were the places people would find signs of abuse. I wouldn't know, 'cause it has never happened to me. Yet, there I stood, going through a humiliating exam for it. As she continued, I felt the hot tears streaming down my face, nonstop. I could feel my eye makeup running into my eyes, and it burned. She was fast, just like she had said she would be. She closed the gown and took a step back. She handed me the tissue once again. I took it that time, without making eye contact with her.

"Well, Bella, I didn't see a thing on you that would prove the accusations to be true. I am so very sorry you had to do this."

She had looked sorry too, but I had no sympathy for anyone at that moment, so she could feel sorry.

"Ok, well, I'll tell Mr. Banner right away, and maybe I can hold him out of talking to your parents until after school, so you can speak to them first."

Shit, I didn't even think about that, surely Mom and Dad wouldn't believe that bullshit. Right? At that point, I didn't care. I had never been more humiliated in my life. They had said this would remain confidential, but in a school that size, and in a town that small, there was no way that was possible. There was no way I could go back there, I had thought; it was too humiliating. Even though everything had been proven false, the rumors would still fly.

"Okay, I'll let you get dress in peace, and remember you can always come to me with anything."

I made a point to make direct eye contact with her and rolled my eyes.

When the door had shut behind her, I stood up, ripping the stupid gown off, not even bothering with the ties. I ripped my sweater back over my head, completely screwing up my hair. I looked in the mirror after I was dressed. If I hadn't looked abused before, I sure did then. My hair and makeup was a mess, my shirt was stretched around the collar from tugging it on so hard. I looked like a train wreck, and I couldn't find it in me to care. I knew I wouldn't make it through the rest of the school day, and I had no car because Alice had brought me to school.

There had been no way I was going home to face my parents before I talked to Edward; he was the only person I had wanted to see at that time. I walked out of the room, and ran past Mrs. Cope, before she could stop me. The halls were fairly empty, because everyone was back in class from lunch. I made a beeline for the first exit.

It wasn't raining out, but it was so cold. My coat was in my locker, along with my cell phone, and there was no way I was going back in. I didn't want to call Edward out of school; I knew he couldn't miss football, because of his dad; the special spring team may have since finished, but they still did some kind of practice. Apparently, psycho runs in the family; like father like son. I'm surprised Emmett and his dad didn't get a long better, because they were both nuts, I had thought, rolling my eyes to myself.

I had decided that I would just walk to Edward's school. It was only about two miles, maybe a little more. I would just wait until he was done with football, and then we could work something out.

As I was walking, I had thought about what would make Emmett do such a thing. Was he that jealous of Edward? He wouldn't ever dare to confront Edward directly; he was too much of a coward. All of the dirty looks and stuff Emmett had thrown at me in the hall, I had never even mentioned to Edward. I knew he would have been upset and I didn't want to cause a problem. Well there was no way I could've kept something like this from him. Emmett involved him directly. I remember thinking that if Em hadn't already felt bad for what he did, Edward would make sure he did.

I continued to walk, and I was cold; I wrapped my arms around my waist and kept going. The closer I got, the more upset I got; I had hoped that I would pull it all together before Edward was finished with football. I was worried that I would freeze by the time that came. When I made it close to the school, my body was numb from the cold, but I was anything but numb. Tears were once again streaming down my face; I was just so mad and so humiliated. I had planned to find a spot out in the field, behind the school, to wait, not wanting to bring attention to myself, but before I could get there, I heard someone shouting my name. I looked up and saw Jasper running towards me.

"Bella, what the hell happened to you?" I couldn't answer him. Everything that had happened had crashed down on me.

"Bella, seriously, you're freaking me out. What the fuck happened? Did you walk here?"

I had nodded, but still couldn't get the words out.

"Your freezing," he observed. He grabbed my hand - not in an affectionate way but just a way to lead me. He unlocked his car and opened the passenger door for me. He ran to the other side, started the car, and turned the heat on high. "I'm gonna get Edward, I'll be right back,"

"Jasper, no! His dad… you can't …football….. you'll get him in trouble…."

I knew I was making no sense, but I couldn't get the words out. Edward would get into huge trouble from his dad if he missed a practice, and I knew when he found out about what happened he would not be going to practice.

"Okay, Bella, I really have no idea what you're saying, but I do know that Eddie boy will beat the shit out of me if I let you sit here and cry, and not go get him, so sorry, Chica, but I win. I'll be right back." He got out of the car and ran towards the school; I knew I couldn't stop him, so I bent over, resting my head on my knees, and let the hot air from the vents wash over me. The more I sat, the more calm I became.

The car door had suddenly and violently flown open. My head popped up, and Edward was there. I couldn't stop myself, I threw myself at him, and the crying started all over again. He let me cry, just holding me. At one point, he had let go so he could sit down, pulling me with him. He kept asking me what had happened, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get the words out. Jasper came back and brought me a bottle of water; I didn't realize how thirsty I was until I drank the whole thing. After I was done, I was finally able to tell him what happened.

Edward had gone stone ridged, and I could hear Jasper behind him, repeating, "Oh shit, oh shit." After I had finished, Edward stood up, walked over to his car, and the next thing I knew, he punched it as hard as he could. The noise and force of the hit made me flinch. He put both arms on the roof of the car and leaned into it, his back to us. I could see his back rise and fall with the deep breaths he was taking; I knew he was trying to calm down as to not scare me. I knew Edward's temper, I had seen it, but I was never scared of him. He finally turned around and walked back over to us. He squatted by the car so he was eye level with me, and put his hands on both of my knees, rubbing them.

"Bella, I am so, so sorry that he did that, and you had to go through that today." His voice was deadly calm. "I'm gonna make it okay," he had added, leaning in to kiss my forehead.

I could tell he was trying to stay calm for me, but his calmness was false and frightening, and I could tell that he was in a rage.

"Edward, I know you're mad, but you can't do anything crazy."

He just laughed at me, and asked Jasper if he would go in the school and get the rest of his stuff.

"No, really, Edward, I'm mad, too - more than you know - but we have to deal with my parents and stuff."

He knew I was right, the principal would be calling in a matter of hours and it would be better if they heard it from us first. He reluctantly agreed with me, that we should see my parents before we saw Emmett, and he asked Jasper if he would come with us. I asked him why Jasper needed to come, and his response had scared me.

"Because, Bella, I need someone there to stop me from sending Emmett to hell."

It was not going to be good. I had hoped that by the time he talked to my parents, he would calm down. The three of us got into Edward's Volvo and headed to my parents' house. He pulled up, and my mom's car was there, so I knew my dad would be home. I really hoped they believed us. We got out and walked in the door. Charlie was in his normal spot, on his recliner, and Mom was in the kitchen. She came in the living room when she heard us come in.

"What are you guys doing out of school?" she asked, giving Jasper a strange look, since she had never seen him before.

"Uh, Mom, Dad, this is Jasper, Alice's boyfriend," I offered as a response to her question.

"That's nice, but once again, why are you all out of school, what's going on?"

"Charlie, Renee, we need to talk to you about something that happened at Bella's school today."

I was grateful when Edward took the situation over. Renee sat down on the armrest of Charlie's chair, and they gave us there undivided attention. Between Edward and me, we had managed to explained everything; I had never heard Jasper be so quiet. My mom had tears in her eyes, and my dad looked so mad. When he got mad, he didn't yell, he didn't throw things, he would get quiet, and his face would turn red; he would be so calm that it was scary. We both had felt bad about doing that when he was sick, but we had no other option.

"Bella, is any of this true?" he asked, looking right into my eyes. I felt Edward stiffen beside me.

"Dad, of course not! You know Edward, you know he would never do anything like that!" I couldn't believe he didn't believe us.

"Yes, I know Edward, but this has nothing to do with Edward, Bella. You are my daughter, and the only thing I am concerned about is your safety." I understood that, but I had been telling him I was safe.

"Edward, Jasper, could you boys step out for a second so we can talk to our daughter in private."

They nodded. Edward squeezed my hand before he stood up, and with out a word the boys walked out onto the front porch.

"Bella, look at me." I looked over at my dad.

"You need to tell me right now… has anything ever happened between Edward and you." I started to tell them no again, but before I could, he stopped me. "I need you to understand that if anything has happened, it's not your fault and you won't be in trouble. You don't need to be scared, you just need to tell us the truth." He had gone into full cop mode.

"Dad." I had made sure to lean forward and look him directly in the eyes. "Edward has never, ever done one thing that could be considered inappropriate or abusive." I took a breath trying to keep the tears back. "I'm not scared of him and never have been." Charlie had taken a deep breath.

"Alright, that's all I needed to hear. You know you could come to us with anything right?" I loved my parents; I knew they would see the truth. I reassured him that I would always come to them.

"Okay, well go get him, I'm sure he's out there about to piss his pants," Charlie added, with a laugh. I walked to the front door, and when I saw Edward I felt so bad. Charlie's assumption wasn't too far off; he looked pale and terrified. He was sitting on the top step with his head in one hand. Jasper had his hand on his shoulder in comfort. When they heard the door open, both of their heads popped up. I told them they could come back in.

The three of us resumed our original spots in the room; Edward and I on the couch, and Jasper sitting on the steps of the stairs.

"Well, since you're still here and breathing, I guess you know I believe Bella," Charlie had said, staring into Edward's eyes.

"Thank you, Charlie. I hope you know I would never hurt Bella."

"I hope, for your sake, that's true." Even though Charlie had believed us, I knew he didn't even like thinking that a man hitting me was a possibility. Edward just nodded.

"Well, we need to figure out what were going to do about this mess." I was so glad to hear Dad say "we". I knew he would try to help us.

"Can't we call the cops on him? He lied, isn't that illegal?" I wanted to see Em get into so much trouble.

"Sorry, Bells, you can't prove it was him; the school will never give his name." Charlie said shaking his head.

"Edward, have you seen him yet?" Mom spoke up and asked.

"Uh, no. I was going to go there after we left here; we wanted to speak to you guys first," My mom nodded in appreciation.

"Renee, I think you should call Mr. Banner before they call us. Let's just put this to rest, and then we need to call Edward's parents; this has gotten out of hand."

I loved that even though he was sick, Charlie still had taken control and handled the situation. Mom jumped up to get the phone to call Mr. Banner.

"Wait!" I said, before she could call him. Everyone in the room turned to look at me because of my outburst.

"I can't go back there; I am so embarrassed, I can't go back there. I won't." I couldn't face all of them again. I knew the rumors were probably already out of control.

Mom sat back down, and she and Dad were giving each other a knowing look. Mom was the first to speak up,

"Here's the deal, Bella. We went to the doctor this morning," My head shot up, as did Edward's. Through all of the drama, we both had forgotten about the important appointment they had that morning. "They found a match," she said with a big smile.

We both jumped up and hugged them; that overshadowed anything else that had happened that day. I was hugging my mom, and I felt a warm body on my back. I saw my mom's eyes go kinda wide. I turned, and stepped out of the embrace I was receiving, and came face to face with a very sheepish looking Jasper, who was stepping back quickly.

"Uh, well you all seem so damn happy, I wanted to jump in too."

We all started laughing. Leave it to Jasper to do something stupid like that. After all the celebrating over the good news, they had given us some more details. The donor was a woman, and was a hundred percent match; it would take place about a week or so after that, when they received the bone marrow, and it was coming from Germany. I was so happy.

"We were actually really scared to tell you the next part, Bella. We have been wrestling with this decision all morning, but now you may be happy about it. Our insurance doesn't cover the entire transplant, so after this quarter we weren't going to be able to afford your school."

They were going to have to pull me out anyway. I didn't really think they would let me leave but they didn't have a choice now.

"That's great!" I was thrilled. I never wanted to go back there. Before that day, I would have been devastated by having to leave but after that, there was nothing I wanted more.

"We would never condone you running from your problems, but since you are going to have to leave in a month anyway, I don't see any harm in you switching now. Ok, well, I guess I'll call Mr. Banner and discuss this as well."

She got up and walked into the kitchen.

"So, wait, does that mean you will go to my school?" Edward had asked, with a goofy grin. I just nodded my smile probably matching his own.

"Saweeeet!" Jasper yelled behind us. "Swanster's gonna come slum it at the public school with us!"

"Who are you again?" Charlie asked, looking at Jasper like he had two heads.

Edward and I laughed and explained in more detail about how we knew Jasper, and Jasper had managed to talk to Charlie without saying anything too stupid. When mom came back in, she said that Mr. Banner understood. She had also asked if Alice could retrieve my things so I didn't have to go back. She said she could not get a hold of Edward's parents, but left a message that they needed to talk. After finding out that my Dad was going to get his transplant, none of the other stuff that happened that day seemed to matter to me anymore.

We were getting ready to leave. Edward had wanted to try to find his parents, to do damage control, and we were all worried about how his dad would react. Because of everything that had happened, Edward was forced to open up to my parents about what his home life was like. Jasper just sat there with his mouth open in shock. We were walking out the door when dad stopped us.

"Edward." He turned to look at my dad.

"You can come to us for help any time."

"Thank you, Charlie, that means a lot." I could tell that Edward was not used to having anyone in his court to back him up. His parents were always against him. After that, Charlie still had one more thing to say.

"I know you're mad, and I am pissed too, but going and picking a fight with your brother will not help this situation. Renee left a message for you mom; let the adults handle it." Charlie was right, but we both knew Edward was not gonna let this go. To prove my point, Edward said nothing back to him about it, he just congratulated him again on the transplant and walked out the door.

* * *

That conversation had happened about an hour before the three of us were sitting on the front porch of the Masen home. If you looked at Edward's bloody knuckles, you would obviously know that Edward didn't take Charlie's advice. I didn't like violence and didn't like seeing Edward that way, but I can't say I blamed him.

Jasper's phone rang. It was Alice; I could hear him telling her the story in the background. I could then hear her screeching through the phone, she was pissed. Edward and I decided that it was best that I not be there when his parents got home. Alice came to pick up Jasper and me. Jasper convinced Alice to stay in the car and not go after Emmett, too; I bet Alice could be even scarier than Edward. Jasper waited in the car while I said goodbye to Edward.

"I'm so sorry, baby," he said again, kissing my forehead.

"You have nothing to be sorry for Edward, stop apologizing." He could not feel guilty for something his brother did. "Will you call me tonight, after you talk to your parents?" I was terrified to leave him there alone; his mom always took Emmett's side and his dad was just an angry, awful man.

"Yeah, I'll call you, but don't worry about me." Yeah, like that was possible.

We kissed goodbye for as long as we could, until Alice honked her horn, obviously ready to leave. We both rolled our eyes, and Edward waved to her. We kissed one last time and told each other "I love you". It made me giddy to say it. Then I went to her car. Jasper crawled into the back, letting me sit up front.

Alice gave me a huge hug, and she started telling me how sorry she was and I just cut her off. I didn't want to talk about it anymore. Instead, I told her about the transplant. She was so happy and wanted to go see Mom and Dad right away. I was scared to tell her about switching schools; I knew she would be crushed. I didn't have to tell her, though, because big mouth Whitlock did it for me,

"Oh and B. Swanie is gonna go to school with Edward and me!" Thanks for telling her gently Jasper, God.

"What!" she screamed, slamming on her brakes.

"Alice, you're gonna get us in a wreck!"

God, she wasn't a good driver as it was, let alone when she was upset. I talked her in to getting us home before we talked about it anymore. When we got to my house, Jasper came inside with us. Alice did the whole celebration with us again about the transplant, and then Charlie asked about what happened between Edward and Emmett.

"You should have seen it Chuck, Edward was all…then Emmett was all." Jasper was jumping around the room trying to reenact the fight all by himself; probably the funniest thing I have ever seen.

My dad yelled his name, in order to stop his one-man show, and then warned him to never call him "Chuck" again. He said it while laughing, so I don't think he was really mad. Charlie made it clear that he didn't approve of the violence, but I think that secretly he was glad that someone took care of Emmett for hurting me. Alice and I talked about why I was switching schools, and that is wasn't just because of what happened but also because my parents couldn't afford the private tuition. She was upset that we wouldn't be at school together anymore, but she understood.

They stayed just a little longer and then headed out. Not too long after they left Edward's mom called my mom back. I was hovering over her, trying to hear the conversation 'cause I hadn't heard from Edward yet. My mom rarely got upset, and it took a lot when she did. Whatever Edward's mom was saying to her was definitely pissing her off. They talked for a little longer and when my mom got off the phone, she was beet red.

"That woman, I swear!" She slammed the phone down, and was pacing back and forth.

"She just won't listen to reason! She says 'Emmett is a sweet boy who would never do something like that'. She has her head so far up her…..never mind," she finished, frustrated.

"Edward has said that his mom and Em are really close, and that she always takes his side," I informed them.

"Well, it sure looks like it." Mom didn't usually get that mad.

"Well, Bella, I really don't want you over at that house if they are not even willing to talk to Emmett about what happened. You and Edward can hang out here, or go out, but I don't want you around… that." I couldn't blame my mom for feeling that way; we didn't go over there much anyway.

"Yeah, and after what I heard about his dad, I really don't want you around them at all," Dad added.

"That's fine; Edward won't let me around his dad, and doesn't like being there, anyway."

After thinking about Edward, I thought again about how I still hadn't heard from him, and I was starting to worry. Mom and Dad had to get to the hospital. We decided we would go to the public school the next day and I would probably start a few days later.

It wasn't until about nine o'clock that night that I finally heard from Edward. He said that his dad couldn't care less about the fight, but was pissed he missed practice. He didn't know yet how much trouble he would be in over it. His mom, on the other hand, ate up everything Em said. Emmett told her that he was our "number one supporter", and that his and my friendship was no different from before. Edward said it took everything in him to not try to beat him again.

His mom said she thinks that Edward has a violent personality and was going to talk to some of her doctor friends at the hospital about what kind of medicine she could put him on. I felt so bad for him; it was hopeless. His mom would not believe anything other than what she wanted to. Edward was right before, when he said that she was irrational and unreasonable.

The only thing that I was happy about, was that, so far, he didn't seem to be in too much trouble. His dad was leaving town again the next day for over two weeks, so at least he couldn't torture Edward daily. His mom… well, the only reason she wouldn't ground him for the fight, to me, was because deep down she knew that Emmett did do it.

If nothing else, we would get to see each other everyday at school. The transplant was the following week, Edward told me he loved me, and I was actively ignoring the negativity of the day. I was going to focus on the future and take it one day at a time.


	13. Chapter 13 The Big Day

**A HUGE thank you to my beta Mamm4ever!**

**I own nothing...**

**Lemons ahead ;) **

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Listen when

All of this around us'll fall over

I tell you what we're gonna do

You will shelter me my love

And I will shelter you

I will shelter you

Shelter Me by Ray Lamontagne

BPOV

The time had finally come; we were in the hospital waiting for the transplant to start. The transplant itself wasn't a huge ordeal. We had found out that there was no surgery for a bone marrow transplant; it was not unlike a blood transfusion. Everyone's mood was high. There would be no more chemo and hopefully no more heartache. Dr. Burke explained that, even though the transplant was non-invasive, the recovery could still be tough.

It was imperative that Charlie be around no one who was sick. In order to receive the transplant, they basically had to kill his immune system and his own marrow, in order for the new bone marrow to grow. His immune system would be non-existent for a while and a basic sickness could be fatal.

Mom and Dad were talking to the doctor right then about how to make sure our home was a safe place for him to recover. We needed to remove all plant life from the house to prevent fungus in his lungs. Any visitor would be required to wear a mask, and whenever Charlie left the house he would need to wear a mask himself. This would keep the germs out of his system. The doctor stressed the importance of keeping basic germs away from Charlie. The most common things we breathe in everyday could make Charlie very sick.

Another interesting detail about the transplant was that he would be receiving other traits from the donor. Because it was a bone marrow transplant he would contract many things from the donor. Among other things, his hair could change texture when it grew back and his allergies would change to be whatever his donor's were. We didn't know much about the donor. We knew it was a woman in her twenties from Germany, but that was it. We signed a paper stating that neither party could contact the other for at least a year after the transplant, and after that it was up to her if she wanted to meet us or not.

There had been so many things going on that week. Mom and I had gone into Forks Public High to enroll me, but after speaking to the principal there, we decided that it was best that I just start at the beginning of the next year, since the summer was so close. Because of the circumstances, Mr. Banner had agreed that I could finish my work at home and take my finals after school in his office.

I looked at my watch and then the door again waiting for it to open. Where was he? Edward was supposed to have been there twenty minutes previously. Since the fight between him and Em a week and a half before, things had been rough for him. School would be out in three weeks, so there were no more games to be played. Missing that practice that day had been no big deal; the coach even called Edward's dad and explained that they had been and would continue to be only doing weight training throughout the summer. In fact, the coach made it clear to Edward's dad that those meetings would be optional for the boys to come in and lift by themselves. No formal practices would be held until late August. His dad would hear none of that, though. Thank God he was gone on a business trip, or I think Edward would have been having an even harder time right then.

He had been grounded until that day and was supposed to be there by then. His mom, well, she has been a whole other problem. Emmett had gotten off with no repercussions. She was convinced that Edward attacked without being provoked at all. When she found out that Jasper and I were there, she decided that we were both bad influences. Right. Needless to say, I had not been to anymore Masen family dinners.

Edward had a summer job lined up as soon as school let out. Jacob's dad, Billy, had a landscaping business, and Jake got Edward a job to work in the early mornings. He would be done with work everyday around noon or so. That would be nice, so he would still have a full day to enjoy his summer. Billy really liked Edward a lot and offered him an after school job, as well, when school started in the fall.

Edward's parents were very wealthy, but helped him with nothing. He paid his car insurance and whatnot with past summer jobs he had had. Even though they didn't want to help him, they also didn't want him working during the school year. Another way to control, they made sure he could only make enough money to pay his car insurance and have just a little left over; never enough to be able to do anything without them. He had already decided that the coming year he was going to fight to keep his job all year; he wanted to move out so badly when he turned eighteen.

Dad decided that he really liked Jasper – even if he was glad that I wasn't the one dating him. Jasper and Alice had been coming around a lot more. Jasper insisted on calling Dad Chuck, and no matter what anyone said to him, that's all he called him. Charlie had given up trying to get him to call him anything else. I had spent a ton of time with them that week that passed, while Edward had been grounded. Alice's dad all of a sudden decided he wanted to play "daddy" and try to say she couldn't have a serious boyfriend. It was a little too late for him to step in, and Alice was having none of it. I knew that Jasper stayed there every time Dale was out of town. Jasper and Alice were moving faster physically than Edward and I. Alice and Jasper had recently slept together. I felt a little jealous because I wasn't sure when Edward and I would get there. I knew we loved each other, I just didn't know how long to wait, what was right for us. The fact that Alice told me how much it hurt the first time didn't help much either.

The previous week, Alice and I went to the local clinic so she could get on birth control without her dad knowing. Even though I didn't know if or when I would need it, Alice talked me into getting it for myself as well. Edward and I were moving forward and trying new things whenever we could, but it wasn't often that we had an empty house. We didn't want to rush through anything.

I finally got brave enough to ask him how many girls he had been with, before we moved too far. I wanted to know how many girls I would be compared to. I was shocked when he said that he hadn't been with anyone, that I would be his first. He seemed more relieved than I was when I told him I had never been with anyone either. Being each other's firsts took a lot of pressure off of us. I think it was because neither one of us knew what we were doing, but we were learning together. Since he had been grounded we hadn't seen each other much. I did go to his....well I guess our school now, a couple of times. Since there was no more technical football practice, there was no one to call his dad and say he skipped, so we spent a couple afternoons making out behind the school, or in Edwards car.

I looked at my watch again; they were all supposed to be there thirty minutes before. I sat and talked to my parents a bit. Not too long after, the door swung open, and all three of them walked in. I heard my mom gasp along side me from what we saw in front of us. Dad started laughing. Edward and Jasper had shaved their heads, to match my father, and Alice had her arms loaded with supplies.

"Whoa boys, loving the new look!" my mom said, as she jumped up and hugged them. I sat there still stunned. Even though I was touched that they would do that to support my dad, I really loved Edward's hair. Whenever we made out, my favorite thing was to run my fingers through his messy, soft hair. I was sure I was sitting with my mouth hanging open when Edward walked over.

"Do you hate it? It will grow back," he said, looking down at me. I was still sitting in the chair.

"No, no I don't hate it. I'm just surprised, is all." Surprisingly, I didn't hate it; he would look good no matter what he did, but still, I would miss that hair. Thank God he and Jasper had nice shaped heads, because that could have been very bad.

"OK guys, we need to give Charlie his gifts!" Alice announced. I nearly died when I saw what she had. I had told them before how the doctor had explained that Charlie would inherit this woman's traits through the transplant, like allergies and whatnot, so apparently they thought it would be funny to give Charlie other feminine supplies as a joke. Jasper had a hot pink fluffy robe, Alice had tampons and Edward was loaded up with PMS medication. Mom and Dad were laughing so hard, and I had tears in my eyes from laughing so hard, as well.

"Ok, Chuck, better put your new stuff on before the transplant, you know, before the girlie hormones kick in," Jasper announced. My dad always had an awesome sense of humor, but I was still shocked when he got up and started putting the pink robe on.

EPOV

I wasn't sure how Charlie was going to take it. We thought it would be funny to bring a bunch of girlie shit to mess with him about getting a woman's bone marrow. He was playing right along though, and putting all the stuff on.

"Ok, we need pictures," Renee announced. Charlie started posing all girlie in his new pink robe, holding his PMS pills and tampons up for the camera. We were all laughing so hard.

"You boys get in there." Jasper and I decided to shave our heads at the last minute to show our support for Charlie. Through all of this shit with my parents, he had supported me; I wanted to do something to show I supported him as well. Jasper… well he was just an idiot who wanted to do something that he thought was funny for "Chuck." I swear if he doesn't stop calling Charlie that, he would find a reason to have him arrested.

We walked over and started posing all goofy with Charlie, and then Bella and Alice jumped in with us. After we were done, Charlie took his new wardrobe off and took some nice pictures with Bella and Renee. This was a big day, and you could feel the excitement radiating from everyone. After I was done with the pictures, I pulled out my baseball cap and put it on. I wanted to support him, but I wasn't gonna say I liked the way it looked; I couldn't wait for my fucking hair to grow back and planned on wearing a hat until it did.

Things had been bad at my house, like really bad. I didn't tell Bella all of it 'cause I didn't want to worry her more than she already was. My mom had forced me to see a therapist for my "anger" that she claimed I couldn't control. I just sat in the room and stared at the fucking doctor for the whole hour, never saying one word. The stupid ass doctor just listened to my mom and prescribed me some fucking medication anyway. She thought I was taking it, but everyday I would spit it out. There was no way in hell I was putting drugs in my body that I didn't need. I knew that the doctor was a friend of my mom's at the hospital, and he just believed whatever lies she fed him, because I sure as hell didn't say anything to him for him to diagnose. I wasn't taking shit.

My dad was out of town, but had threatened me with everything he could think of to make me go to football; I just hated the game now. He had ruined it. He did all of that so I could play in college. That was his dream, not mine. He had called recruiters, trying to get them in to watch me in games and practice. There was no way I was going to play in college; he could think whatever he wanted, though. I planned on never talking to him again once I got there, he wouldn't even know what college I went to.

I had only said one thing to Emmett after I beat the shit out of him. I told him that he was to never speak to Bella again. I wasn't the type of prick to tell my girlfriend who she could and couldn't talk to, but her safety was important to me and Emmett was obviously fucking nuts. When I asked her to stay away from him, she happily agreed. I knew Bella was worried that I would get into trouble or that people would believe his lies, I didn't give a fuck about that. I only cared about her. When she told me what had happened that day, I had never felt anger like that in my entire life. I was so glad that I had Jasper come with me, 'cause I very well could have killed Emmett that day.

Jasper had proven to be a good friend. He and Alice seem to have gotten very close; I knew exactly when he started fucking her too, 'cause the idiot couldn't keep his mouth shut about it. I had really seen a change in him, though; he didn't pay any attention to any of the other girls in school anymore, at all. Alice had him wrapped around her finger. He also knew everything about my family now.. Jasper, Alice and Bella's parents, they all knew. After what happened, it wasn't like I couldn't tell them. I had been humiliated at first, but they were all so supportive to me. I had never had support before, and it felt good. Those people were my family and I would do anything for them.

It was probably horrible timing when I told Bella that I loved her, but it just felt right. I loved her so much and would do whatever I had to in order to keep her away from the psychos that I lived with. She didn't know it, but I had a long talk with Charlie and promised him that I would always keep her safe.

He acted like he wasn't gonna make it through all of that. He asked me that, even if Bella and I didn't stay together, would I still watch out for her. It was hard to have that conversation with him. I just kept telling him that it didn't matter, that he would be fine. He just said that there were no guarantees and he needed to know that someone was going to take care of his little girl. I understood, and I promised him that I would always watch out for Bella.

I knew I never wanted to be without her, I knew I wanted to marry her someday. I wasn't gonna ask him to marry her or anything, I was only seventeen for God's sake, but I knew, without him saying it, that he gave me his blessing to be with her anyway. The look in his eyes during that conversation scared me; he was really scared that he was going to die, and I could tell. Never before had he shown any signs of doubt or weakness; he did his best to be strong for Bella and Renee. I didn't blame him for being scared; I would hope that I could be half the man he had been through all of that.

Charlie, Renee and Bella were done with pictures. The doctor asked us all to leave for the transplant, except for Bella's mom. We said our goodbyes and headed out the door. I could tell Bella was nervous, but was so happy that the donor came through.

"You know, you look pretty sexy in that hat," Bella said, grabbing the bill.

"Hmm, really? Well, you will be seeing a ton of it until my hair grows back," I said with a wink. She just laughed in response.

"That was really sweet that you and Jasper did that for my dad, it means a lot." I just shrugged and told her it was no big deal. I wasn't very good at talking about feelings and shit.

"So, I think Alice and Jasper went back to her house to... you know," she trailed off suggestively. I just shook my head pretending like I didn't know what she was talking about. "To uh... have sex," she whispered, like it was a dirty word. I just laughed at her. She was pretty damn innocent, but I wasn't complaining about that. I was so happy when I found out that no other motherfucker had ever touched her before. I could be pretty damn jealous and I wasn't sure what I would have done if she had been with other people. We had started to move forward a little bit, but I didn't want to push her too fast, and didn't plan on trying to sleep with her anytime soon. That didn't mean that I wasn't willing and ready, I just didn't want to pressure her before she was ready. I could tell right then, though, that she really wanted to mess around. There weren't many times that we could be alone.

I wanted nothing more than to drag her back to her house and fool around until I had to go home, but I just wouldn't feel right doing that in her dad's house while he was at the hospital getting a transplant, and I knew she felt the same way, too.

We talked about it for a minute when she turned to me and said, "There's always your car."

That was why I loved the shit out of that girl. I grabbed her hand and ran in the direction that my car was parked. I could hear her laughing behind me.

We jumped in the car and just started to drive. It was close to summer, but it wasn't warm enough to just hang around outside yet. We drove until we found this little field outside of town. It was just about twilight, and the sky was an awesome mix of colors from the sun setting.

"Let's go lie in the grass." Apparently she forgot where we lived and how that would not be fun. She must have read the reluctance in my expression.

"Oh c'mon, it's not wet and it's so pretty, let's watch the rest of the sunset from out there." She didn't wait for me; she climbed out of the car and started to walk into the field. I grabbed a jacket that was laying in the backseat so we would have something to sit on, and followed her. She was right; it really was pretty out there. There was forest all around and then the opening was just perfect - all grass that was the perfect color of green. There were patches of flowers, ripe from spring. I stood for a second and just watched her as she observed her surroundings.

She stood with her hands resting on the back of her hips. Her brown hair was flowing with the breeze. She stood there, just staring up at the sky. I walked up behind her and put both of my arms around her, hugging her back to my chest. Neither of us said anything; we just stood in silence, appreciating the quiet.

After a bit, I threw the jacket down and sunk to the ground, pulling her with me.

"Whatcha thinkin about?" I asked. She didn't seem sad, just....quiet.

"Nothing," she replied softly.

"Nothing? You can't not be thinking," I teased her, shaking her softly.

"I know, I guess about my dad, and how lucky we are that he got the transplant."

"I'm really happy about that too, Bella," I said, kissing her temple. I was happy, and I hoped that that would be the end of it all for their family.

"I was also thinking about just how much I really love you," she said, as she twisted around to face me. She reached up and twisted my hat so it that it was on backwards. She was so fucking beautiful. Even out there, in a cold meadow that had turned dark.

I never thought I would ever find anyone. My whole existence was spent trying to figure out how to get away, to run and never look back as soon as I could. Now I would do anything just to stay there and be with her.

"You are the most important thing to me now, the most important thing to me... ever." I leaned in and cradled her head in my hands and softly pressed my lips to hers. This was different than what we had done in the past. It wasn't a kiss in the mist of a lust-filled make out session. That kiss was filled with all the love that we could possibly express. I lay down and rolled us over so I was hovering on top of her, or "stacking" as Renee liked to call it. I was still embarrassed about being caught that day, not there though. We were alone in a dark field where no one was going to interrupt us. I continued to explore her mouth, and every once in a while a little moan would escape from her. Those moans went straight to my dick, making me painfully hard.

Her hands flew to my hair, only to find a hat, before she sighed, remembering there was no hair there anymore. I pulled back to look at her, her eyes were hooded with lust and love. She licked her lips and just stared back at me. I never knew I could love someone so much. She reached up, locking her arms around my neck pulling me back to her. I went straight for her neck and started licking and kissing her. Her moans were growing louder and her hands were getting braver. She didn't have my hair to play with so her little hands started exploring the rest of me. She ran her hands over my chest, then under my shirt and up my back. It felt so fucking good. We continued to kiss, and I started an exploration of my own. I rested my weight on one forearm and ran my hand up and down her side.

My hand was resting just under her breasts and I wanted to squeeze them so fucking bad. I wanted nothing more than to see what they would feel like under my hand. She arched her back sending her tits closer to me. I pulled back, silently asking her with my eyes if she was ready for this. Bella reached one hand up to my head softly caressing my temple, and the other she rested on top of my hand, putting pressure on it, pushing it towards her arched chest. I moved my hand up and gently squeezed her over her bra and shirt. Best fucking thing I had ever felt. A groan escaped me right when Bella let out a soft sigh. She started rubbing herself on my knee that was in-between her legs, looking for friction. I leaned down to continue kissing her, my hand never leaving its new favorite place.

It just felt so fucking good. My dick was so hard it was straining against my pants. I knew I was rubbing it against her, trying hard to get some relief. In a moment of bravery, I felt Bella's hand slip down my chest and rest on the top of my jeans. I felt myself stiffen, surprised by her bravery. I was always the one to initiate moving forward physically. I tried not to do too much, because I didn't want to push her.

"Are you sure?" I asked my voice sounding thick. She didn't respond, she just pushed her hand until it was holding my dick.

"Fuck, Bella." That was nothing close to what it felt like when I jerked myself off; her hand felt so fucking good on my dick.

"I..uh..I don't know what to do," she said, blushing red. I leaned forward and kissed her forehead.

"Just...uh grab it and move your hand like.... up and down." I felt like a fucking pervert trying to explain to her how to jerk me off. As soon as her hand started pumping me though, all rational thoughts left me.

"Oh, fuck, baby that feels so good."

She continued while I went back to her tits. I slid one hand under her shirt and headed north.

"Please, Edward," she broke from the kiss, asking me to continue. I didn't have to be asked more than once. My hand dove under her bra and, fuck me, if I thought they felt good over her shirt, nothing compared to this.

Her tits were the perfect size, I could feel her nipples pebble under my palm. I started to think about what they would look like with her laying on her back out there. With that thought, I felt the familiar tightening,

"Bella..Bella, stop!" I said, jerking away so she couldn't continue. I was about to jizz in my fucking pants and that would be a good way to scare her away and fucking humiliate myself.

"What did I do? Did I hurt you?" she asked, genuinely concerned, sitting up on her forearms.

"No, in no way was what you were doing classified as hurting," I said with a laugh.

"I just didn't want to ...you know....."

"Oh. Don't you, you know.....wanna finish though?" she asked, looking up at me. Did I wanna finish? Of course I wanted to fucking finish, but I realized that if we didn't stop I would end up taking her right in that field. I had no condom and she deserved better. She deserved a warm bed. Right when I thought that, I could feel a ripple go through her from the cold. My hand was still in her shirt, on her perfect chest. I leaned down and gave her a long slow kiss.

"I love you." I wanted her to really understand how much she meant to me.

"I love you, too," she said, turning my hat back around facing the front.

"Let's get you home, you're freezing," I fixed her bra the best I could; I really didn't have a fucking clue about them. I just pulled it down, trying to leave it how I found it. I helped her up, and adjusted my fucking hard-on in my pants. I planned on fixing that as soon as fucking possible.

I wrapped the jacket around her shoulders and led her back to the car. I opened her door and helped her in. I jogged around and turned the car and heat on high, so we could warm up. The ride back to her house was quiet, I just held her hand in her lap. Every once in a while she would lean over and kiss me on the cheek, or bring my hand to her lips and kiss it. We pulled into her driveway and saw her mom's car there.

"Edward, did I..uh do something wrong tonight?" Why the hell would she think that?

"No, baby. You were perfect, more than perfect, why would you think that?" I couldn't even control my mouth, cussing like a fucking pervert out there every time she touched me.

"I dunno, you just seemed like you were liking it so much and then you just.... stopped." I felt so bad. I had stopped because I was trying to respect her, but she took it as rejection.

"Bella, I didn't stop because I wanted to, trust me." She looked down in her lap. "Look at me," I demanded. She looked up. "I would have gone all the way tonight, I wanted to so bad. I didn't want your first time to be like that - out in the cold and rushed. I don't want you to regret doing it. Also, I didn't have anything on me." It was true, I was a guy. I wanted nothing more than to do it, in fact I thought about it all the fucking time, but I didn't want to get her pregnant, and I didn't want her to do anything she wasn't ready for. She had surprised me with how bold she was. Maybe she was just expecting me to make the move.

"I went with Alice and uh.. got the pill, so that if we do.... we'll be protected or whatever," she said, shocking the hell out of me. She was blushing bright red.

"I won't regret it Edward, I love you." I leaned over the center console and kissed her softly. I had no idea that she did that. Apparently she thought about it more than I thought she did.

"I didn't know, I'm sorry." I felt like an ass. She was ready and I cocked blocked myself... fuck.

"Don't be sorry. You're right. I really didn't want that to happen in the meadow, I guess. I just wanted you to know that I love you, and I would never regret anything that we did." There was nothing more to be said. She was the only one there would be for me and I knew it. I looked at the clock on the dash, realizing I needed to get home. That was my first day off house arrest and I didn't want to be late. I walked her into the house where Renee let us know everything went perfect at the hospital, and Charlie should be home with in a week or so. After our goodbyes, I jumped in my car and headed home.

I walked into my house and went straight to my room, ignoring my Mom on the way up. I went directly into the shower and wrapped my hand around my cock; it felt nowhere near as good as Bella's hand, but it would have to do for the time being. It didn't take very long with the recent memory of Bella's tits in my hand. I stifled a groan leaning against the shower wall as I came into the shower drain. I got out and dried off. As I crawled into bed, I noticed I had a text from Bella,

Best night ever ;) Love you.

I texted her back and had the best night's sleep I'd had in a long time.

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**Please review and let me know what you think! :) **


	14. Chapter 14 Summer Blues

**SM Owns Twilight. **

**Big thanks to Mamma4ever for her beta work! **

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_But if the rain must fall_

_If I lose it all_

_If the world comes down and takes my soul_

_If the sky turns black_

_And there's no, no way back_

_It won't matter much to me_

_If I had you_

_All I need is your love_

_That's all I need_

_All I need is your love_

_If the Rain Must Fall by James Morrison _

It was July and the summer had been going ok. I was able to finish my finals after school in Mr. Banner's office. The rumors had already been flying, and I was so glad that I didn't have to go back to that school. People were so dumb. Without even knowing Edward or me, they had taken sides. It drove me crazy. I knew Alice fought to defend us, but I had asked her to stop; there was no point. Emmett had graduated, being a year ahead of us, so hopefully we wouldn't have to deal with him much. He wasn't going to college as of yet, but he would be gone for the whole summer at some training thing, I really had no idea what it was. He hadn't given me and Edward any further trouble; in fact, no words had been exchanged between the three of us, at all. Alice had tried to pick a couple fights with Em at school, and the principle told her to stop picking on him. It was really pretty funny. I didn't care what others thought. I only cared what my family and close friends thought, and they knew the truth.

Edward had been working for Billy. He even managed to get Jasper a job there as well. He liked his job and I think he really loved working with Jasper, but it was tiring. It was back-breaking manual work and he would was exhausted after his shift.

He was meeting me for dinner, and I was excited to see him. Thank God his hair had grown back, and Charlie's was just barley starting to as well. It had been a couple of months since Charlie's transplant. He was weak but was doing well. He came home about a week after the transplant and we had to be so careful about what was around him.

Mom threw away all of her plants, we had the carpet and all of the furniture cleaned. My mom was super paranoid about the germs, so she even had their mattress and all the bedding replaced. No guests had been allowed in the house. I hadn't been to the house in three days. I had come down with a small cold and even though I hardly felt it, something like that could be super harmful to Dad. I had been staying with Alice, and thank God Dale had been home, because I didn't think I could handle the Alice and Jasper love nest. Dale was, however, leaving that night, so Edward was going to spring me for a few hours. I prayed that they would be done doing whatever it is that they do by the time I came back.

Since I hadn't been able to have Edward over and we obviously didn't go to his house, it had been hard to have any alone time. That first night in the meadow was so amazing. I appreciated how careful Edward was with me and how he didn't want to push me, but he couldn't hide it all. I knew he wanted to move forward, and so did I. I had never done anything like that before; Edward was my first kiss. I didn't know where my bravery came from when I reached down into his pants, but I was surprised, I liked it. I liked it a lot. I had never been touched the way that Edward touched me. When his hands were on me I felt like my whole body was alive. I felt things that I had never before, and it left me wanting more. He made me feel like the most beautiful girl in the world that night and he hadn't even seen all of me yet. I had touched him but hadn't seen him yet either. From the feel of him though, Edward was big, and I was sure it was going to hurt the first time.

We went back to the meadow one more time since then and got about as far as we did the first time. Also one time we tried in his car but the center console was in the way and we were both so paranoid about being caught that we just gave up. Tonight though we would be in Alice's house with no parental supervision and I couldn't wait.

I was sitting at Alice's kitchen table waiting for her to come down from getting ready. I was avoiding being upstairs because Dale was running around getting ready to leave. Things were a bit tense there. Dale was always nice, well as nice as Dale could be. He always came off aloof, but I didn't take it personal.

"Alice, I'm outta here! See you in a few days!" I heard Dale shouting up the stairs as he was running down them. He looked like he was in a hurry. He was wearing a nice black suit that I was sure cost him a small fortune. He ran into the kitchen and grabbed a banana and headed for the door.

"Bye, Mr. Brandon, thanks for letting me stay again." I said as I watched his retreating back, he just stuck a hand in the air and waved, he couldn't speak because the banana was shoved in his mouth. Thank God Jasper didn't see that, he would never let it go.

The next thing I heard was the garage door open and close and a car driving away. Not five minutes later Alice came bounding down the stairs.

"Is he gone?" she asked peeking out the front curtains.

"Yeah, he just left, seemed like he was in a hurry."

"Ok, so why have you not called the boys yet?" She asked looking at me expectantly.

"Well, he just left and the guys should still be working." Alice would never have the guys' schedule figured out. It wasn't a complicated schedule, Alice just didn't pay attention half the time. It wasn't all her fault, though, there were days like that day that they worked later than expected. Edward was getting a lot of overtime. Even though it was exhausting for him, he was loving the money he was making.

He was actually putting it all in my bank account, because one time last year he told me that his dad had gotten into his account and took his money. It was a punishment for missing a touchdown that lost a game. He couldn't drive for the next six months, because he couldn't pay his car insurance. I swear I learned new things everyday about his parents, and they just made me sick. I'm not even sure how he had managed to keep it from happening, but I still had yet to spend anytime with Edward's father. I hadn't spent much time with his mom, but when I had been around her she was cold, and just as friendly as she needed to be.

She had decided that Edward spent too much time with Jasper and me. She actually made a chart and sat him down. The chart had certain hours that he was allowed to see Jasper or me, and then there were certain hours - the majority of them - that were blocked out. In those hours, he could only see people if they were on the football team. Other than the fact that Edward should be able to see whomever he wanted, she also scheduled our time when she knew he was working. This kept us from each other a lot.

There's no way to describe just how nuts this woman was. Edward was seventeen and perfectly capable of deciding whom he wished to spend time with. She literally had to control everything. It was some kind of mental disorder I swear. Edward had tried to fight her on it; in fact, it was a fight everyday. He explained that he wasn't really friends with the guys on the team and had no interest to be. One day, she went as far as to call Mike Newton's mother and try to set up a play date for him like he was five years old. Not only did Edward hate Mike Newton, but she had humiliated him, and Mike was not shy about telling everyone what had happened.

That pushed him over the edge; he lost it that day. He left his house, refusing to spend the day with Mike, and he ended up staying the night at Jasper's, avoiding going home. His mom just about lost it. She threatened to take his car away. If she did that, we would never see each other. His parents didn't pay for his car, or Emmett's either, for that matter. They were gifts from their grandmother before she died. Because they were under eighteen, the cars went into their parents' names. I'm not sure when Edward's parents slept; I imagined them staying up all night just thinking of ways to control their children's every move.

That night was not one of our "scheduled" nights, but his dad and mom were supposed to leave out of town that day, and Emmett was gone, so there was no one to tell on him. A couple times in the past, Edward had lied and said he was going to be with someone else, but then came see me. Elizabeth was evil, but she wasn't stupid. She started checking his story, or driving by to see if he was really where he said he would be. So that ended really fast.

Billy, Edward's boss, was pretty awesome; he was just like an older Jake. Edward's mom and dad had both done some of their weird things in front of Billy. He caught on pretty fast that they were nuts. He had let Edward off early or just gave him the day off a couple of times so that he could see me. When Edward's parents would call and make sure that Edward was there like they did at random times, Billy would say that he was there all day and would even make sure that he would add on how much he liked Edward and what a great kid he was. It felt like we were in the Twilight Zone - everyone around us was normal, but his parents were far from it.

Edward was seventeen and wouldn't be eighteen until the following May, and it was only July. I knew that if things didn't change, he would move out the night he turned eighteen - like at midnight. He wouldn't be there one more second than he had to be. We looked into getting him out early, but it was just not realistic. By the time court and everything was through he would be almost eighteen anyway. Not to mention that we didn't have the money to fight his parents in court, and he didn't even make enough to prove that he could live on his own. Ten months… ten more months of that. We could do it, it would suck, but we could do it. I was just afraid that they would do something even crazier, like make him move or something. I would stay with him and do whatever I could to help him. After that ten months, we could move on and pretend like that never happened. That he never had crazies for parents and that my dad had never been sick. We could be free and happy.

Alice pulled me from my thoughts asking me what I wanted to do for the day. We decided to take advantage of our boy-free time and do some girly things that they wouldn't want to do. I tried so hard to be supportive of Alice, but I did get jealous at times, although I never showed her that. She could see Jasper whenever she wanted and his mom was awesome. It was just hard because some weeks Edward and I could hardly spend an hour together, and they were together day and night. Alice deserved to be happy. Jasper tried to take care of her; no one had ever done that for her.

We had an awesome afternoon. Alice liked to sew a little bit as a hobby, so we went to the fabric store and she picked out new fabric. I had no interest in sewing, but I really enjoyed picking out the fabrics. When we got back to the house it was almost time for Edward to be off. I was excited to see him. We were sitting at the table when the door bell rang. Alice jumped up to answer it.

I heard hushed voices coming from the entry way. I could tell it was Jasper, but I didn't hear Edward. I stood and went to the front door and saw Alice and Jasper talking quietly.

"Swan!" Jasper said as a greeting. He was always happy; it was nice to have someone like him around.

"Hey Jasper." I saw a look on Jasper's face, and I could tell he was trying to hide something.

"So..uh where's Edward?" I asked. I knew that they got off at the same time from work.

"Well, about that...The wicked bitch of Forks," that was Jaspers name for Edward's mom, "She decided that he can't be trusted at home alone, so she decided to stay behind and just let his dad go alone." My heart sunk, that meant a whole weekend where I probably wouldn't get to see Edward at all.

"I'm sorry Bella," Alice said with a sad look on her face.

I didn't want them to worry about Edward's and my problem; I wanted them to enjoy their weekend. "Hey, no big," I said, with the most convincing smile I could.

"Well, we were gonna go to dinner and a movie, you should come," Jasper suggested and Alice nodded in agreement. I knew that they really wouldn't mind if I tagged along, but I just didn't want to.

"You know, I kind of had a headache anyway, so I'll just take it easy tonight. You guys go and have fun." I said as upbeat as I could.

"Well, if you change your mind, we would really love if you came with us," Alice offered again. I just nodded and headed upstairs to the guest room I had been staying in. I sat on the bed and tried to figure out what I would do with the rest of my weekend. I was all dressed and ready for our date together, so I changed into some yoga pants and a tank top. I decided that I would just go for a walk. It was a beautiful summer day and I was going to do my best to try and enjoy it. When I walked down the stairs to leave, Alice and Jasper were making out on the couch. Yeah, I didn't want to see that.

Right when I stepped out, the heat assaulted me. It was hot and bright. I wasn't sure where to walk to, so I just started heading down the street. I wanted to go home and talk to my mom about what was happening with Edward and his parents. It made me sad that I couldn't even go there. I almost called Edward, but I knew better. He was probably fighting with his mom right then about it. I knew he would call me as soon as he could.

I ended up in a little park around the corner from Alice's. I was just sitting there enjoying the weather when my cell phone rang. It was Edward.

"Hey," I said a little too excitedly.

"Hey babe, did Jasper tell you what happened?" He sounded . I could tell that his parents shit really wore him down.

"Yeah, it sucks really bad," I said.

"You have no idea....wait, hold on." I could hear noises in the background like he was talking to his mom. About a minute later, he came back on.

"Where are you?" I told him the name of the park I was in by Alice's house.

"Ok, stay there, I'll be right there." He hung up before I could ask him to explain.

He lived closer to Alice than he did to me, so it didn't take him long to get there. When his car pulled up, I was so excited to see him. He got out and kinda jogged over to me. I stood up from the bench and he wrapped me in a huge hug burying his face into my neck.

"This sucks so bad. I hate my parents," he said into my neck. I didn't say anything, I just rubbed his back. I wanted to ask him how he managed to get there and away from his mom, but I felt like it would jinx us or something. I didn't have to ask though.

"We have like twenty minutes," he said, looking down at his watch.

"My mom forgot her prescription and she can't be without it. I'm shocked she didn't make me go with her, well she almost did," he said, rolling his eyes.

"I'm so glad you came," I said. I reached up and gave him a kiss. We ended up just sitting and talking the whole time. Yes, we talked on the phone but it was different to talk in person, to be able to hold hands, hug, and just be together. The twenty minutes came and went much too soon, and he was standing to leave. We kissed each other and I told him how much I loved him. He ended up driving me back to Alice's house and dropped me off. I felt I was going to break down standing in the driveway watching his car disappear into the distance. I walked into the house, trying to convince myself that ten months wasn't that long, but let me tell you right then it felt like forever. For the first time ever, I was looking forward to school starting, so I could see him everyday.

EPOV

July and August dragged on so slow. I was so glad that it was finally September. I liked my job alright, but it was hard work and wore me out. Basically, I mowed lawns and shit for rich people all day. I was able to work with Jasper, and Billy didn't really monitor us much. The best part about it is that it wasn't home and I would do just about anything to not be home. With football I couldn't really even work after school. Billy had let me continue working on the weekends. I had been able to save a shit-ton of money and it was all safe in Bella's account. I knew my parents would ask me about it eventually, but until that time came, I wouldn't worry about it. They tried to make me quit, but all of the sudden Dad decided that I needed to get a better "work ethic" and let me keep my job - I think he just liked me out of the house.

My mom had gone so psycho bitch over the summer. She was making "Friend Charts" and shit to control whom I saw, and how long I saw them. She was crazy, it was official. My dad was home the whole fucking month of August and it was miserable. I would work all morning and then come home and have to do a ton of shit for him while he screamed at me. Even though it had been awesome having Emmett gone, it hasn't been awesome to have to do both of our work.

I had barely been able to see Bella and her family the whole month of August. My mom was watching me so fucking close. I had been tempted to tell her to "fuck off" and just do what I wanted, but I knew they were capable of destroying my life completely. So I just did what I had to do. I never spoke to my mom or dad unless I absolutely had to. Eight more months, just eight months until I would be free and never see those people again. I hoped that they would be happy, they would never see me again, never know their future grandchildren.

It was already the second week of school; I liked going to school. Well not going to school I guess, but seeing Bella everyday. The counselor Bella was assigned to was awesome and made sure she was in three of my classes and two of Jasper's so the transition would be easier on her. That way she only had one class on her own.

I didn't want to think about that anymore, I just wanted to get to school and see Bella. I decided to leave a little early, and surprise her; pick her up at her house. She was still driving her dad's truck. The transplant and everything had drained her parents, and there was no way they could afford to get her a car. I left my room and headed downstairs to my car. My mom was down there waiting for me. She started talking to me, but I completely ignored her and just walked out the front door. I drove to Bella's as fast as I could, to get to her before she left. I pulled up to the house, happy to see the truck still there. When I shut my car door, I saw Bella's bedroom curtains open and her standing in the window smiling.

She ran down the front steps and jumped into my arms. We had been doing a lot better since school started. It had been getting stressful that summer; we had ended up bickering over nothing just because we were upset about the situation we were stuck in.

"Morning," I said laughing into her hair. I hoped she was always this excited to see me.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" she asked.

"I dunno, I thought you might like to spend a little extra time with me to and from school, but if you don't..." I said playfully as I started to walk away from her. She laughed and grabbed my arm.

"I would love that, just let me grab my stuff." She ran back into the house to grab her backpack when she came out I helped her into the car and we headed to school. She seemed to like our school. She hadn't met a ton of new people because she stuck pretty close to Jasper and me. I was fine with that. Mike Newton, the fucker, had tried to get at her every chance he got when Jasper and I were not around. She had, however, become a little close to Jasper's sister Rosalie and her friend Angela. I had never spent anytime with Rosalie before and I thought she was cold, but she was actually pretty nice once you got to know her. You didn't want to fuck with her, though. That was another reason why I liked her; she was the first one to tell Newton to fuck off for Bella. Angela was always with Rosalie, but she seemed like a nice girl. We all felt bad for Alice being stuck at the private school, but it was our senior year and we were all almost done.

It was Bella's birthday the next day and I had a really special night planned for her. I had it all worked out. Jasper's mom was out of town. I told my mom I was staying the night at Jasper's. Rosalie offered to act like she was Japer's mom, in case my mom called to check and make sure I was there. I was going to take Jasper's car and leave mine in his driveway in case my mom drove by. Then I was going to take Bella to a concert in Seattle. Her favorite band, The Killers, happened to be playing on her birthday. I had already cleared all of this with her mom and dad. They were not, however, ok with us staying there by ourselves overnight, so we would be making the long drive back the same night. It would be worth it though. I was shocked she had stayed with me through everything. I didn't think that most girls would have. I wanted to make the whole summer up to her, but I knew that wasn't possible, so I would do whatever I could and I knew she would love the concert.

"Do you have football tonight?" Bella asked, breaking me out of my thoughts of the next day.

"Yeah, I forgot. Do you mind if Jasper takes you home?" Shit, I didn't know how, but I forgot about football.

"That would be fine, but do you mind if I just wait for you? I could do my homework and then we could still drive home together," she offered.

"If you want to, yeah, I would love to see you after practice," I said grabbing her hand and kissing the back of it. We made it to the school and started for our first class. She had her first class with Jasper, so I just gave her a kiss and headed off to my class, eager to get the day over with so I could take her to Seattle the following day.

After we drove home, I told her that I would be picking her up in the morning so she would be ready. Even though she begged, I wouldn't tell her what I had planned. I came home and finished all my weekend chores so my parents would have no reason to stop me from going the next day.

I didn't even know that my mom was going to be out of town, but when I woke up the next morning, she was gone. Dad was still there, but he didn't give a fuck what I did.

"Where's Mom?" I asked him. He was reading the paper at the table and just ignored me completely.

"Ok, well I'm gonna be gone, so I guess I'll see you later," I said as I headed out the door. I wasn't sure how long she would be gone, but I knew she didn't tell me on purpose. She knew I would have made plans behind her back if I had known she was going to be gone. It didn't matter though. Nothing would have kept me from making Bella's birthday special.

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**Please review and let me know what you think! **


	15. Chapter15Killers,Frogs,andTurkeys oh my!

**Thanks to Mamma4ever for her beta work! **

**SM Owns Twilight **

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_I had a dream that I was falling, down_

_There's no next time around_

_A storm wastes its water on me_

_But my life, was free_

_This is the world that we live in_

_I still want something real_

_This is the world that we live in_

_I know that we can heal over time_

_The World that we Live in by The Killers_

EPOV ~September~

"C'mon tell me!"

We were in Jasper's car on our way to Seattle and she was still begging me to tell her what we were doing. At first, I just kept telling her to wait and see, but then I thought I would have a little bit of fun with her, since she wouldn't stop asking.

"I know how much you love sports, soooo your Dad thought it would be a great idea for us to come to Seattle and see a game!" I said with enthusiasm. Her mouth dropped wide open, that would be the last thing she would have wanted to do for her birthday.

"Oh... wow... that sounds... thanks Edward," she said with a big smile trying so hard to seem grateful and excited. I rolled my eyes.

"Bella, do you really think I would drag you to Seattle - on your birthday - to do something you don't want to do?" She let out a huge sigh of relief. I couldn't help it, I started laughing at her. She had to know that I wasn't going to give in and tell her where we were going. Of course she didn't give up, though.

"Oh, thank God. Ok, let me think," she said, tapping her head with a finger. "You had Alice pick out my outfit, so she must know where we're going?" she said, questioningly looking over at me. I could see the wheels turning in her head. I would have to thank Alice though; she put Bella in the sexiest jeans and a T-shirt that looked worn. It was a fight, but I convinced Alice to put her in flat shoes. Alice wanted her in heels, but I knew Bella would hate walking in them, and they would be uncomfortable at a concert.

"Are we... going for a boat ride?" she asked.

"Yep, you got it!" I decided I would tease her until she just left it alone.

"Really?"

"No," I said, laughing. She just rolled her eyes, thinking some more.

"Hmmm are we going to have dinner on the waterfront?"

"If you want." We would have to eat somewhere, and if that's where she wanted to eat that was fine with me.

"So that's not it?"

"Bella, please just wait. It took so much for me to get this planned, just let me surprise you," I pleaded. I really wanted to surprise her, and the guessing game was getting a little old.

"Ok, fine." She gave in. "How did you plan this anyway? Your parents were ok with it?" she asked in disbelief.

"Well, I wouldn't say that they were exactly "ok" with it, but they won't know." I didn't want her to worry about that on her birthday. For just one night, I wanted to pretend that I was normal and didn't live with the craziest people in town. I explained just enough so she would understand why we took Jasper's car.

"I don't even care what we do. Thank you so much for planning all this," she said, leaning over the armrest to kiss my cheek.

"Of course, happy birthday." She just smiled and leaned back into her chair. We drove for a little while in silence, just listening to the radio. Out of nowhere, she jumped up, and started pushing buttons on the dashboard.

"Whoa.. What are you doing?" I asked. Jasper would kill me if she screwed up his sound system.

"I love this song, I'm trying to turn it up."

I leaned forward looking at all the buttons on his car stereo, while still trying to watch the road. I found the volume and turned it up. The Killers started coming out of the speakers.

"I love them so much," she said, bouncing her head to the beat of the song.

"Did you know that they're in town tonight? They would have been... wait!" She whipped her whole body towards me and grabbed my arm that was sitting on the armrest with both hands.

"Oh my god! We're seeing The Killers aren't we?" Thank god that's what we were doing, because I would have felt like shit if the answer was no; she was so excited. I just looked over at her and smirked, she was impossible. It was her birthday, and if she just wanted to know and didn't want to be surprised, that was fine with me.

"Yeah, we're seeing The Killers," I said to her, and her face fell a little.

"What? Do you not want to see them?" I was confused; she was so excited about it a second ago.

"It's ok, I can catch them next time. Whatever you have planned will be awesome," she said with a sweet smile. Then I figured it out, she thought I was still lying to her. I started laughing so hard. I could have just told her the truth the whole time and it would have still been a surprise to her.

"What's so funny?" she asked.

"You are."

"Why is that?"

"Because little Miss Pouty," I teased her, bumping her shoulder. "I'm not lying this time. We really are going to see The Killers." Her whole face lit up.

"Really? Don't play with me Edward." She was so fucking cute.

"I swear! Look in my jacket pocket, if you want, the tickets are in there." She flew at me, her arms wrapping around my neck from the side. I wasn't ready for the force and the car swerved a little bit, so she backed right off.

"Sorry, I'm just so excited! Thank you so much Edward!" She was beaming the rest of the way to Seattle.

The concert was awesome. The band wasn't my favorite, but they did put on a great concert. Bella, well, she loved it. She was smiling and singing along with the band the whole time. I would do anything to see her happy like that. She had been nothing but stressed and sad. Dealing with her dad being so sick and my parents, I was so glad that she was able to just let loose and have fun.

We were on our way back, it was late and I was fucking tired. Bella was out cold in the passenger seat, wrapped up in my coat. I had just gotten off the phone with Charlie, letting him know we were about an hour out. The band ended up playing a little later than I thought they would, and Bella and I were starving after the show. We ended up going out for something to eat. I knew Bella's parents weren't crazy like mine, but they would still appreciate an update that we were going to be late. I also called Jasper, just to make sure that everything was going ok. He said that my mom had called, but believed Rose with no problem, so we were safe. I would have to thank Rosalie, Jasper and Alice again for their help with all of this.

I hadn't known what to get Bella for her birthday, I knew I could've asked Alice for help but I really wanted it to be something special from me. I ended up just wondering around the mall and I saw a bracelet in one of the windows. It was silver and had a single charm on the end in the shape of a heart. The sales lady explained that I could have the heart engraved and then charms added for any special event in the future. I liked the idea of it being something special we could add to as time went on. I didn't have a fucking clue what to engrave so I took the sales lady's advice and had her initial engraved on it. Bella loved it; I gave it to her at dinner. She put it on and said she wouldn't ever take it off. She asked if I would mind if she engraved an "E" on the other side. I told her I would take it in the next day and have it done for her. I thought about doing that when I bought it, but didn't want her to think I assumed she wanted to wear my initial around her wrist. I fucking loved that she wanted to, though.

I finally pulled up to her house. I was just about to the point where I couldn't keep my eyes open anymore.

"Bella, baby, wake up." I leaned over the seat and gently shook her, trying to wake her. She just grumbled and shook her shoulder apparently wanting my hand off.

"Bella, we're home, babe. You gotta wake up." I stretched across the seat and kissed her cheek. She slowly looked up, she was out of it. She reluctantly got out of the car and shivered from cold night. We walked up to the front door and opened it. Charlie was sitting in his recliner, asleep, with the TV on, waiting to go to bed until his daughter was safe and home. Bella walked over and shook his shoulder.

"Dad, Dad wake up, I'm home."

"Hm... mmm," he mumbled a bit, waking up.

"How was it?" he asked, standing up, his voice thick with sleep.

"It was so much fun," Bella said, now very awake herself.

"Good, good. Ok kids, well I'm going to bed. Happy birthday, sweetheart," He said, giving her a one-armed hug.

"Thanks for making her birthday so special, Edward. Drive safe on the way home," he said, still not all the way awake. With that, he went upstairs, and I heard a door close. Bella walked over to me and wrapped her arms around my neck.

"I had so much fun," she said, standing on her toes to kiss me.

"I'm glad," I managed between kisses.

She pulled me to the couch, and we started making out. Our kissing was frantic and needy. Faster than ever before, her hand was in my pants and she was pumping me. I rolled us onto our sides so that she was in between the couch and me. I had one hand in her hair, and the other went straight under her shirt. When I made contact with her breast, she moaned into my mouth and it made me impossibly harder.

"Edward...Edward," I stopped and pulled back to look at her; I thought something was wrong.

"What's the matter?" I asked brushing stray hair out of her eyes.

"No, nothing I just..." she started to push on my chest wiggling, I moved back thinking she wanted up, but then she reached down and grabbed the hem of her shirt. Fuck me. She wanted to take her shirt off. I reached down and started to help her. She was soon only in her bra and we resumed kissing. I was rubbing my hands all over her, I took a second and leaned back to look at her; she was fucking beautiful. I held her close to me and kept kissing her. I slowly ran one hand down her stomach and rested it on the button of her jeans.

"Please," she breathed into my mouth.

I slowly started to undue her pants and slipped my hand into her underwear. Fuck, she was so warm and wet. As soon as I touched her, she moaned loudly.

"Shhh baby," I whispered to her. Even though I loved to hear her, the last thing I wanted was for one of her parents to hear us. Really, I should've stopped us, but I just couldn't.

I had no idea what I was doing, to be honest, but she was making the best fucking noises and thrusting her hips forward into my hand. I continued rubbing her and reached my other had to the back of her bra. After about five minutes of struggling with the fucker, she finally reached up and took it off herself. I almost jizzed in my fucking pants. Her tits were beyond perfect. Everything seemed to stop around me, and I just stared at her. She started to squirm a little under my gaze.

"Bella, you're so beautiful. I love you so much."

She leaned in and started kissing me again. I snapped out of my daze, got brave, and slipped one finger into her. She once again moaned loudly. I pulled out of her, not wanting to, but knowing that being caught wouldn't be worth it.

"Can I see it?" she asked in a quiet voice, looking down to where her hand had disappeared beneath my pants.

"If you want.''

She slipped her hand out of my pants and undid my zipper. She pulled my dick out of my boxers and gasped a little.

"You ok?" I asked. She hadn't moved.

"Yeah, I just... have never... you know seen... that's not gonna fit," she said, looking up into my eyes, hers wide.

I laughed a little, "Let's not worry about that right now."

She wrapped her hand around me and started stroking me.

"God, Bella," I said, burying my head into her neck. We kept going, and it only took a little bit for her to get me to come undone. She watched the whole time with innocent eyes. I loved her so much. After we were done, and cleaned up, I helped her put just her shirt back on, not wanting one of her parents to catch us off guard. We laid there and talked about everything that had been going on since the beginning of the summer. She told me how the time until I was eighteen was nothing and how she would stand by me no matter what my parents did. After a while, neither of us could keep our eyes open. If we fell asleep and Charlie found us in the morning, that would not have been good. So I reluctantly peeled myself of the couch and put my shoes back on. Bella walked me to the door and kissed me goodnight. We had such an awesome day, and I knew that we would be ok. We just had to get through the next eight months.

~October~

"No, get it out of my face," I said, pushing the offensive fabric out of my line of sight. "There is no way you're going to get me to wear that."

"Edward, please," she whined, handing the costume back to me.

"Alice, there is nothing you can say, or do, to get me to wear that."

"It's Halloween, you have to have a costume."

She had been bugging me all day to wear this vampire costume for the Halloween party she was having that night. It was black and it had fucking sparkles all over it. The front of it went down low so it would show my chest. It was a fucking vampire porn costume as far as I was concerned.

"No, I don't have to dress up, because I'm not twelve anymore, and I don't want to dress up." I really wasn't that against dressing up, but I wasn't going to be a douche in a sparkling vampire outfit. The month before, when I told Alice that I owed her for helping me with Bella's birthday, she said she wanted me to help her with her Halloween party. I would have never agreed if I had known that that meant her picking out my costume. I spent all day being her bitch; decorating whatever she wanted me to with Jasper, and making store runs for her. However, this? Hell no! I draw the line at sparkling vampire outfits.

"Alice it is a little... lame." Thank God I had Bella on my side.

"Well, what do you suggest, Bella? It's a little late to get something else, now; all the stores will be cleaned out."

I've never seen someone so hyped up about Halloween. Bella warned me about how Alice was with Halloween, but shit. I couldn't wait to see what Jasper was stuck wearing. Alice wasn't stupid' she waited until that day to show us our costumes so we wouldn't have time change.

"Let me make a phone call," Bella said, and ran off to get her phone. I prayed that she would come through for me.

"I really don't know why you're being so difficult," Alice said.

"Me? Really? Your boyfriend, who I have never seen get embarrassed, has locked himself in a room and won't come out. What are you making him wear?" I asked, laughing. Jasper was an expert at making an ass of himself, and I have never seen him get embarrassed. He took a bottle of Jack and had locked himself in the room saying he wouldn't come out until he was drunk. Alice rolled her eyes at me and stalked back upstairs, probably to try to coax him out.

While I sat downstairs alone, waiting for everyone to figure their shit out, I thought about what had been going on since around Bella's birthday. Since the end of summer, things had gone pretty well. Charlie was getting so much better. His hair was not really growing back a ton, but despite that, he was getting better each day. We still couldn't go over very often and they were still very guarded about germs. He had had some visitors over, though, and was not nearly as sick as he used to be.

Bella's mom and my mom had gone out for lunch a couple of times. I had no idea what Bella's mom said to mine, but she had relaxed some on her "schedule." I had been able to see Bella and Jasper a ton more, as long as I went to football and did well in the games for my dad, and kept good grades for my mom. Hopefully, they will continue to back off. I hadn't told Bella yet but my mom had decided that week that Bella needed to come over at least once a week. She said she was not ok with me dating someone that she didn't know. Whatever.

"Ok, what do you say to the woman that saves you from a tacky vampire costume?" Bella asked, walking back into the room.

"Did you find another costume?" I was praying silently that Bella had better taste than Alice did.

"Yeah, I called my dad and he said you could wear his uniform." Well shit, that was better; a real police uniform compared to a sparkling vampire outfit? I could deal with that.

"Awesome, thanks babe," I said, giving her a kiss.

"Yeah, the pants probably won't fit, but you could wear the shirt and just black pants or something."

We told Alice about our idea and she loved it, she ran to the store to get a couple of things to go with it. Bella refused to wear the matching vampire outfit Alice had for her as well. She decided that she would wear my football jersey with shorts. She had these little black shorts and tied my jersey in the back so it wasn't swimming on her. Alice put two black smudges under her eyes and put her hair into what she called "French braid pigtails". I had no idea what that meant, but they looked good. She looked fucking sexy in my jersey and I loved having my name on the back of her, that way no fucker would forget who she was with. Alice was irritated that we didn't match, but we didn't mind and that was all that mattered.

After all was said and done, I ended up in Charlie's police shirt with his belt, minus the weapons. He wouldn't let me wear his badge either. Alice got aviator glasses and a fake gun for me. I really looked pretty fucking awesome.

Alice came prancing down the stairs in the pinkest princess outfit I had ever seen. I assumed then that Jasper would be her prince. She stood at the bottom of the stairs begging him to come out. We hadn't seen him all day.

We heard the door open and then Jasper yell down the stairs, "Alice, baby please," he whined.

"Jasper, it's not that bad." Listening to them made me wonder even more what the fuck she was making him wear.

"It is too that fucking bad Alice! This fucking thing reeks like ass too!" Bella and I just looked at each other; she was wide-eyed. I am sure she was also wondering what could be so awful.

"OK, I'll wear the vampire," he pleaded.

"Too late, I'm already a princess," Alice shouted up the stairs. She turned to us. "I offered him the sparkly vampire outfit first, and he laughed at me. He said he would wear anything but that, so I picked... anything," she said, with a wicked smile. Remind me to not fuck with Alice.

"C'mon douche it can't be that bad!" I yelled up the stairs.

"Fuck you, Masen! You got a fuck-awesome cop outfit!" He yelled back.

"Just come down, we promise we won't laugh," Bella tried.

Jasper appeared at the top of the stairs and Bella clasped her hand on her mouth trying not to laugh. I made no effort to hide it. I don't think I had ever laughed that hard in my entire fucking life. Alice shot me a dirty look, but she could only look so mean covered in head-to-toe pink with a crown. I had to grab the banister of the stairs to keep myself up, I was laughing so hard. Jasper was in green tights and a giant fucking frog costume. He was the frog for the princess to kiss, too fucking awesome.

"That's right. Laugh it up fucker," Jasper said, dryly brushing past us, and plopping down on the couch.

"Ribbit...Ribbit..." I started following him making frog noises until Bella slapped me in the arm and mouthed "stop that."

"It's not bad, you look handsome." Bella was so sweet, but no one was sweet enough to truly believe that he looked anything close to handsome, and Jasper knew it. He just rolled his eyes.

"Can someone just get me a fucking shot?" It was the least I could do. I did feel fucking bad for the guy.

Within an hour, Alice's condo was packed with bodies, and Jasper was beyond wasted. There were people there from Forks High and Forks Private. We were all having a pretty good time. Rose and Angela came and were hanging out with Bella. Since Bella started spending a bit more time with Angela, I had gotten to know her boyfriend, Ben. I already knew him, he was on the football team, but I never made an effort to get to know anyone, but he was a pretty cool guy.

The party was fun and everything managed to stay under control. Bella and I didn't drink much because we promised Alice we would stay sober and make sure no one got out of control. Alice didn't want anyone driving drunk when they left, and she really didn't want her dad to know she had a party at his house. Bella didn't like to drink, so she didn't care. I had a bit to drink. I would have had more, but figured that it would be better if I stayed sober.

By about one o'clock in the morning, people were leaving. Jasper was passed out on the floor, leaning on the couch; his tights ripped, exposing his white pasty legs. His frog hat was half off and he had drool coming out of his mouth. Thank God I wasn't responsible for that. That's what Alice gets for fucking dressing him that way, I thought jokingly.

Alice was pretty far gone herself, hugging everyone telling them they were her best friend and that she loved them so much. Apparently, she was an affectionate drunk. I had to step in a couple of times and tell a couple of fuckers to back off of her. Jasper was too far gone to notice, and a couple of assholes were trying to take advantage of her. That's another reason why I was glad I stayed sober; a couple of guys kept trying to get on Bella, too, and it I had to fucking control myself so I didn't knock them the fuck out.

Between Bella and me, we got the wasted twins to bed after everyone was gone. We cleaned the downstairs up a little, figuring they could do the rest in the morning. My parents thought I was spending the night at Jasper's, as did Bella's. I felt a little bad about deceiving Bella's parents, but not at all about mine. We made our way upstairs to go to bed; our first time overnight together.

The next morning I woke to Bella on my chest, nothing in between us, just her chest on mine. She was fucking beautiful, even with her hair all messed up and makeup smeared. I lay there watching her sleep, thinking about the night before. It was the first time we had ever been alone and not have to worry about someone catching us. We were able to go slow, opposite of the hectic rush we were always in. We didn't even have to worry about noise because the other occupants of the house were passed out drunk. Fuck, I loved the noises she made, that she made because of what I was doing to her.

We made out slow and soft, undressed each other slowly and completely, for the first time. Bella went down on me for the first time and I on her. It was the most amazing night of my life. It became something so much more than being horny and getting off. I loved her and it was a way I could show her. We didn't even talk about going further and having sex that night, we just knew each other and knew that was enough for the night. She fell asleep naked, lying on my chest and was still that way. I knew this would not happen often, but it was too late, I was addicted to it; to waking with her in my arms. The last thing I thought before I fell back asleep was that we only had to wait seven more months.

BPOV ~November~

"Shit!"

"Are you ok?" Mom asked, running into the kitchen.

"Yeah, I just burnt my hand on the stupid pan." I was trying to get the damn turkey out, but my mind was elsewhere.

"Well, do you want help?" she offered.

"No, Alice will be right back. She just ran home to change," I said. I didn't want to hurt my mom's feelings, but I also didn't want the kitchen to go down in flames from her "help" either.

It was Thanksgiving and it was supposed to be a good day, right? Well, so far it hadn't been. Since Halloween, Charlie's recovery had not only stopped, but had digressed.

The hair he had been growing back, started falling out again. The strength he had gained was quickly leaving his frail body. He was cleared for guests and leaving the house, with out a mask, around Halloween. We didn't know if he picked something up or what. The doctors couldn't figure it out. Even though the doctors told him he was fine to live normally, we were still so careful. Mom even spent a couple of nights at Alice's when she had a sore throat. We still limited the visitors at the house, and Charlie only left to go to the doctor.

Edward's mom had backed off just a little bit. We got away with our "sleepover" on Halloween. Well sort of. Dale forgot something and tried calling, but Alice was so freaking passed out drunk she never heard her phone. So he came back and found us in bed with the boys. There was some screaming and kicking of Jasper and Edward out, but that was it. He wasn't stupid, he knew his seventeen year old daughter was dating and he knew what she did while he was always gone, but he still left her. He told us to clean the house up. He attempted to have some sort of his version of a sex talk with us, but when Alice starting ranting about how he had no right to try to be in her life now, he stopped. I understood why Alice felt that way, but he was trying to be home more and I could tell he was making more of an effort to be there for her, in his own way. I was afraid that it was just a little too late, especially now that she had Jasper. After the brief argument, Dale left back to his job.

Alice came over every holiday with us, and this one was no exception. However, this year Dale was in town and Mom felt the need to invite him as well. Shockingly, he said yes. Mom and Dad got along with Dale fine, even though they didn't have much in common. Whenever they were together, Dale and Dad stuck to the only topic they had in common, Dad putting the criminals away and Dale keeping them there. Other than that, what else would they have to talk about? Mom would politely listen, and mostly talk to Alice and me.

This year was all sorts of different, though. Jasper would also be there for dinner as well. His mom and sister were going back to Texas, where Jasper's mom was from, to see family. Jasper told her he had to work so he couldn't go. We knew that wasn't true though, he just didn't want to leave Alice. I thought it was sweet.

Edward was trying very hard to come here too; Emmett was back in town, and he didn't want to be there. Mom and I ran into Elizabeth at the grocery store when we were shopping for Thanksgiving. Mom not only invited Edward, but she invited Elizabeth and Edward Sr. as well. I almost panicked in the middle of the store. There was no need to though, because Elizabeth turned to my mom and coldly let her know that Thanksgiving was for family and in no way were the Swans family to her.

My mom just shrugged and said, "Well that's fine that you feel that way. Edward is most definitely part of our family, though, and we will be there for him if he needs it." With that, she gracefully pushed the cart away, leaving Elizabeth standing amongst the cereal with her mouth hanging open.

When I confronted her about why she was inviting them in the first place, she just laughed at me and said that she knew Elizabeth would never accept the invitation. That by asking her, we were doing the right thing, and she could continue being a bitch all she wanted. I was a little blown away; those were things that didn't often leave my mother's mouth.

I laughed remembering it while I was cooking in the kitchen. I decided to just turn the oven off and wait for Jasper to get the turkey out of the oven. My mom went overboard and bought the biggest turkey in the freaking store.

Speak of the goof and he shall appear.

"Happy Thanksgiving, Chuck!" I heard him yelling from the living room.

"Jasper, could you come in here?" I shouted in the direction of the living room.

He rounded the corner and my mouth dropped, he was in dress pants and a nice dress shirt. I had never seen him in anything but clothes that looked like they had not been washed. Granted what he was wearing was wrinkled, but he looked handsome, and I knew Alice would be happy to see him dressed up.

"B-dawg!" he greeted me with a kiss on my cheek.

"Well, you look handsome," I said.

"This ol' thang?" he said in a thick southern accent, as he did a little twirl in the kitchen to show his outfit off like a girl.

After he was done with his show, he got the turkey out for me. Not long after, Dale and Alice came in. We all sat down to eat. I was stalling as much as I could, hoping that Edward would make it. His mom said no, but I knew he would do whatever he could to get over there. Everyone was seated wanting to eat, I couldn't stall anymore. I walked in and took my seat next to Dale. Jasper was on the other side of me; I was trying to keep some space between them. Dale regarded him coolly when he saw him. When I sat he turned to ask me where Edward was. My stomach dropped; surly he wouldn't tell my parents right her at the Thanksgiving table. Dale wasn't a great dad, but he was one to keep his kid's friend's secrets, I hoped he was anyway. He kept eye contact with me a second after I answered him and then he let it drop. My parents didn't seem to catch anything, maybe he wasn't even trying to do anything. It was probably just my guilty conscious.

I did feel guilty too. It wasn't like me to sneak behind my parents back like that. They were so open with me and reasonable with their rules. Dealing with all this shit with Edward's parents had made us sneak around when otherwise we never would have. I finally just told my mom what we did. Well, no, not what we did, just that he stayed the night with me. I didn't know if Dale would call her, so I just came clean. She understood, but was disappointed that I took advantage of Dale being gone; she felt I disrespected him and his home. She agreed that she wouldn't tell Dad. She said exactly what I was thinking at the time, "Who am I kidding, you are a saint compared to your father and I at your age." She let me off the hook pretty easily.

The dinner went so nicely. Dad and Dale talked their law talk and Jasper even got in on it, asking them questions. Mom, Alice and I talked about random things. They were excited about the shopping the next day. Making plans about where we would go, well, where they were going to drag me to. If it was up to me I would stay in bed. They called the day "Black Friday" for a reason. Yes, it was the best shopping day of the year, but it was ridiculous. People getting out of bed at three a.m. to catch a sale, no thanks. It was something we did every year, though, and I wouldn't ruin it for them.

Before I knew it, dinner and desert were done, guests were gone, and the fancy dishes were tucked away in their correct spots where they would wait until Christmas. Mom and Dad had long gone to bed, and I was still downstairs waiting and hoping for Edward to show. I knew by now that it wasn't going to happen, I just was... hoping I guess. I had called and texted him and had no return. My heart was breaking; Edward didn't ignore my calls, ever. Something happened. Something was keeping him from me. They had a house phone that I have never called. I looked at the clock; it was after midnight, too late to call. I wanted to drive by, but I knew I would see nothing and his parents would freak if they saw me. So I waited, waited for a phone call or for a visit, knowing neither would come. All the while I kept repeating to myself, six more months, only six.

It must have been at least another half an hour when the hallway light from upstairs turned on. I jerked my head around to see my dad struggling down the steps.

"Bella?" he asked in a whisper, squinting into the dark living room where I was sitting.

"Yeah Dad," there was no point in hiding the sadness in my voice, he would have seen through it if I tried. He walked over and sat next to me. I took the blanket that was on my lap and threw it over his lap as well.

"What's going on, it's so late," he said, in a quiet voice.

"I'm just thinking; can't sleep," I said, in the same quiet voice.

"About Edward." It wasn't a question, so I just nodded.

"It's too bad what they do to him, I never thought that I would ever be ok with a boy that you decided to date, but I am." He turned his head to look at me. "Edward is a good kid, no, he's a good man. He has had to grow up to deal with the crap his parents put him through." My dad had never spoken like this before. It was nice to hear that he understood everything that had been going on.

"I know you're worried about him, but he's tough. He'll get through it and he will be strong in the end."

I just nodded; tears were streaming down my face. It was more than me being sad about not seeing my boyfriend. It was watching the man that I loved, that I knew I would be with forever suffer; being treated so badly. I didn't care what anyone said, he was being abused; verbally by his father and most definitely psychologically by his mother.

"I really do like Edward." I gave him a look, I didn't like the tone in his voice. I could tell there was a "but" coming.

"Now just listen," he said.

"I really do like Edward, I don't know if a father could pick a boyfriend better for his daughter, other than not having one at all, that's what we dads really prefer," he said, with a playful smile.

"He has been with you through all of this with me. He has supported you, protected you, and loved you when I couldn't, and that's my job," I heard his voice break just a little, I turned to argue that he has never let me down, but he put his hand up to stop me.

"But I hate to see you suffer like this. It's sad that he is stuck with parents like that, but you are suffering with him. Maybe if you just waited until he turned eighteen and then tried again." He finished.

"Not happening, Dad, I love him more than anything," I said sniffling.

"I figured as much, I just hate to see you so sad," he said, patting my leg.

"I know, I'm sorry. I'm not sad, only when I am forced to be away from him. I don't want to leave him, and it would kill him if I did." Dad just nodded. He knew that, he knew that Edward needed us. He knew that I needed Edward.

The words went unspoken, but it was more than Dad just being sick that kept him from being in that position for me. He was the one who supported me and protected me while I was growing up. A father is the first man a girl should ever love, but then a man comes and takes the responsibilities away from the father. I think my dad was having a hard time coming to terms that that was happening to us. He would always be my dad, the one I learned from. I was growing up, though, and found someone earlier than I ever expected to, I just knew, though. I knew Edward was it for me.

"Well, I'm gonna head upstairs, you should too," he said, removing the blanket.

"I will in a few minutes."

"Night Bella," he said, as he was walking away. I don't know why but I felt like I had to tell him.

"Dad." He stopped and turned towards me.

"I love you so much." I saw him smile in the dark room.

"Love you too, Bells, I always will," he said and headed upstairs.

What happened next was like slow motion horror. Charlie was about half way up the stairs, when he clung to the railing, and dropped to his knees. I flew from the couch and ran to him. He was struggling to breathe, it seemed that he couldn't get air into his lungs. He couldn't support his own weight, and I couldn't support him either. We both went tumbling to the bottom of the stairs. I started panicking. I had no clue what was going on. He couldn't get air, so he was having a hard time speaking. I kept asking him if it was his heart, afraid he was having a heart attack. He shook his head no. I could tell that the fall had hurt him, but there was no way I could get him up. I felt horrible pain in my leg, but ignored it. Charlie was grabbing at his throat, trying to get air. I ran into the kitchen, grabbing the phone. I called 911 and ran back to him. I started crying and screaming for my mom.

The next thing I knew, my mom was on the floor with us and there was a pounding on the front door. I ran to let the paramedics in. They loaded Charlie on a stretcher and put him in the back of the ambulance. Mom got in with him. I tried, but they wouldn't let me go with him. I fell to my knees in the middle of the yard watching the ambulance drive away. The lights from the ambulance gave the pitch-black night an eerie glow. It was the end of November and it was cold, the yard was full of frost and the pavement sparkled from it. My knees instantly burned from the cold, but I couldn't make myself stand. I heard a horrible choking noise and realized it was coming from me, I was sobbing. I sat alone in the dark, frozen front yard and cried.

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**Thanks to everyone that reads and reviews!  
Please take a minute to let me know what you think :) **


	16. Chapter 16 Breaking Point

**Big thanks to Mamm4ever for working though this hot mess! Love ya bb!**

**Thanks to everyone that reads and reviews, you guys rock!**

**Warning! There is abuse in this chapter, read with caution! **

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_Limb by limb and tooth by tooth _

_Tearing up inside of me _

_Every day every hour _

_I wish that I was bullet proof _

_Wax me _

_Mould me _

_Heat the pins and stab them in _

_You have turned me into this _

_Just wish that it was bullet proof _

Bullet Proof, I wish I was by Radiohead

**EPOV**

"Seriously, just give it back," I said again, begging for my cell phone back.

"No, Edward, this is a family holiday." She was like a broken fucking record. That's all she would say; I had done nothing to get my phone taken away. She just decided that she didn't want me to have it anymore.

"Mom, yes I know, but one phone call to say happy Thanksgiving isn't going to mess with our family dinner."

"I'm not discussing this anymore," she said as she walked down the hall. She told me that I was not allowed to see anyone on Thanksgiving, because it was for family only. I wanted to ask her if that was the case even if you hated your family. I bit my tongue, though; I didn't want to do anything to give her a reason to keep me from Bella again. I decided I would get through dinner, and then try to call Bella after.

I walked into the living room, where our "family" was sitting. Most people have their whole family over, aunts, uncles, grandparents. No, not us. It was a sad picture; my dad was sitting at one end of the table, pouting, probably because he had to sit and eat with us. Emmett was sitting on one side of the table, looking very uncomfortable. He should; I still wanted to beat the shit out of him. His face just screamed "hit me". My mom was fluttering around the room trying to pretend like it was the perfect holiday. She had the table all decorated and candles lit. Who the fuck was she trying to impress?

She walked to the opposite end of the table and sat down. Emmett had not been home for very long, but he had already started sucking up like crazy. He was at some training summer classes in Seattle that helped kids out of high school decide what they want to do. He was still trying to figure out what he wanted to go to college for, guess twelve years of school wasn't enough time to figure it out for him. He was just too scared to leave home. I didn't get it, I wanted out so bad.

"Knock it off Edward!" Dad yelled at me out of nowhere.

"Knock what off?" I had no idea what the hell I was doing wrong.

"You're over there pouting like a little girl, knock it the hell off."

I said nothing back, was I pouting? I really didn't give a shit; this was the last place I wanted to be. Mom fluttered back in the room from the kitchen with more food to put on the table. If you can call it food.

She only believed in healthy foods, so there were no traditional things on the table. Instead of a whole turkey, she only had white meat turkey slices. No potatoes and gravy, no sweet potatoes. There were many trays of... mush. Green, yellow, and one that was a mix of brown and red. No thanks. I swear it was impossible for us to have a nice dinner - she couldn't let her control down enough to just serve a fucking Thanksgiving dinner.

"This looks great, Mom!" Emmett said, with a ridiculous amount of false enthusiasm.

"Oh thanks, baby, I thought I would try something new this year," she replied with an equally fake response. Gag the fuck outta me. Dad just sat there and stared at the inedible food. Wow, ladies and gentlemen, my father and I finally agree on something.

"Honey, was there something wrong with a normal holiday dinner?" I was glad he was trying to be nice; I didn't want to be mean either, because she _did _work hard on it either way.

"No, I just thought it would be nice to have something healthy," she said in a very clipped tone - she was pissed. When Dad saw she was pissed, that made him pissed.

"Well, I'm not getting much nutrition when I can't stomach the shit, Liz," he said in a raised voice. I just sat my fork down and leaned back, ready to watch the show. I got pissed the longer I sat and watched them argue over the shit for food. I knew that Bella's mom invited us over, and I could have been eating the best food ever right then, but no, I was sitting there watching my own personal "Jerry Springer" show in my own dining room. I decided to pipe up and say how I thought Thanksgiving should've gone.

"The Swans invited us over, that would have been nice," I said in a normal voice. Somehow they both heard me over their shouting.

"The _Swans _are not your family, Edward, we are," Mom sneered.

"And what a wonderful family we are," I said with a fake smile. I should've known to keep my mouth shut, but I just couldn't help it.

"Why, you ungrateful little shit!" Dad yelled, sliding his chair back and standing up to tower over me. Too fucking bad for him, I'm bigger, all I had to do was stand up and the roles were reversed. He was screaming at me and spit was flying in my face. He was pissed about dinner, about having to be at home and not out of town, but he was taking it all out on me. That was fine, I could take it. I just stood there and waited for him to be done. I was not scared of him, but I learned screaming back did nothing. In fact if I just stood there, it pissed him off more. He wanted a fight and I wasn't gonna give him one.

"Both of you, sit down!" Mom yelled, throwing her napkin on the table. Emmett continued to sit there like an idiot, eyes wide, mouth agape. I slowly sat down, keeping eye contact with the fucker the whole time. After I was seated, he stepped back and sat in his seat. Everything was so quiet; no one was talking, not even moving. It was like we were all flash frozen in our chairs.

Emmett opened his mouth to speak, but before a single sound could come out, Dad whipped his head around to him and yelled,,"Keep your fucking mouth shut!" I did something I never thought I would do... I stuck up for Emmett.

"What the fuck is your problem, he didn't even fucking say anything," I said, in a low voice, through gritted teeth. It was the first time I had cussed directly to my parents. I knew I was starting something that was gonna get out of hand, but I couldn't find it in me to care. I was tired of sitting back and taking all this, or only standing up for myself once in a great while. They were fucking crazy, and I thought it was time that they knew it.

"Do you want to say that again, Edward?" Dad asked, in an unnervingly calm voice.

"I sure fucking can, if you were too goddamn deaf to hear me the first time," I said calmly.

He flew out of his chair, causing it to fly backward and slam into the wall. I saw my mom and Emmett flinch in their seats, but not me. I wasn't letting this stupid motherfucker intimidate me anymore. I sat in my chair and just watched him, with a smirk on my face. I watched him make a fool of himself. He wasn't yelling, he wasn't saying anything, just standing there, breathing hard. He was too stunned to have a come back. Time seemed to drag, I was starring at him, he was staring back and Mom and Emmett were staring at both of us.

"Edward, please, just sit down," Mom pleaded to my dad. He slowly stepped back, brought his chair to the table, and sat back down. He had suddenly gotten so calm. He was disturbed, so I knew this calm did not mean this was over. I wasn't stupid.

"Elizabeth, can you hand me the... the... that," he said, pointing to the reddish, brown mush. She slowly picked up the dish and handed it to him. Emmett's eyes followed the dish across the table, scared to make eye contact with anyone. After a long period of silence Em looked up and made eye contact with me, silently thanking me for sticking up for him. I just gave him a slight nod letting him know it wasn't a big deal.

"Elizabeth." Mom looked up and over at my dad. "I want you to take this ungrateful little piece of shit's phone away," he said, like I wasn't even in the room. I decided to remind him that I was.

"Oh, no worries, she's crazy just like you; she already took it away."

Mom gasped and Emmett's eyes widened. I knew I was pushing too far, I knew he would get physical soon. I didn't give a fuck. He just ignored me and continued to talk to my mom. I could tell though, he was pissed. His fists were in a tight ball on the table, and I could see his jaw move from his teeth grinding in anger. His whole body was rigid.

"Elizabeth, is it too late?" he asked my mom. All three of us exchanged looks, what the fuck was he talking about?

"Is what too late honey?" I could tell my mom had no idea what he was talking about.

"I know you looked into it before, neither one of us really wanted him." What the fuck was he talking about?

"The abortion, Liz, is it too late? I really want this little fucker dead." Fucking. Crazy. Psycho. When no one answered him, he just continued on. "I guess it probably is." He turned and looked right into my eyes. "Should've killed you when it was still legal."

I was done, I didn't have to listen to this sick fuck anymore. I stood calmly from my chair, and walked out of the room, heading for the stairs. I could hear him from the dining room.

"Have a nice night, Edward!" Stupid fuck, I hated him.

I walked upstairs and slammed my door. I turned my music on and wanted to tune out the whole world. I had sick fucks for parents, and I had no clue how to get out. I wanted to run, but I wouldn't for two reasons. One, I wanted to go to college and I wouldn't be able to do that if I ran and never finished high school. Two, Bella. I could never leave her. I wanted to call her. I told her I would do whatever I could to see her. Now I couldn't even call her, and I knew she would worry. There was nothing I could do about it now, except wait. I would wait for them to go to bed and sneak down to try to find my phone. If I couldn't find it, then I would just use the house phone.

As I lay there, I wondered how her Thanksgiving had gone. I looked out the window and noticed it was dark. I was shocked to see that it was after ten o'clock. I had been lying there for hours. I thought about what Bella was doing, I assumed that everyone was gone and she would be in bed by now. I knew that Alice and Renee where gonna drag her out shopping in the morning. I felt a spike of jealousy go through me as I thought about her Thanksgiving. I knew that Jasper and Alice were there, and I bet they all had an awesome dinner. Even though I felt lame for thinking it, I couldn't help wondering if she missed me. I hoped it didn't, but I wondered if my absence hindered her dinner, wondering why I didn't show, or call. I never wanted her to hurt, but I couldn't help wanting to be missed. I meant nothing to anyone in my family. I wanted to mean something to her at least.

I lay there until midnight, waiting to hear signs that they were going to bed. While I was waiting, there was a knock on my door. I knew Mom was probably already drunk from her wine, and I assumed Dad was well asleep by now. That only left one person, Emmett. We hadn't spoken at all since the big fight months ago. I stood up and opened the door, walking away without even confirming that it was Emmett. I sat on my bed and looked to see him standing awkwardly in the door way.

"What," I asked flatly.

"I just wanted to see if you were cool."

"I'm fine," I said. I was in no mood to bond, or whatever shit he was trying to pull.

"Ok, it was just really harsh down there, and he was talking about all the shit he was gonna do to you after you left the table." When I didn't respond to him he continued on.

"I just thought you might wanna know." I didn't want to know, I knew our fight at dinner was gonna cause major problems for me.

"Ok," was all I said back. He turned to leave and then stopped, looking back at me.

"Uh... is.. Bella..." my head shot up I didn't want her name coming out of his fucking mouth. He must have noticed the hostile turn in my expression, because he quickly continued. "I was just wondering how she was doing?"

"Well, when you lied to get her stripped searched at her school, you lost the right to know how she is." I didn't have it in me to start a new fight tonight.

"You're right. I tried to call her to apologize, but..." I stood up, pissed that he called my girl. I didn't give a fuck if they were friends at one point. He went out of his way to hurt her and it was my job to make sure people like him stayed the fuck away.

"Don't freak, Edward. Charlie answered and basically told me to fuck off, in his own cop way. I get that I fucked up and can't talk to her. I just want her to know... that I'm sorry," he finished lamely.

"Get out." Was all I said. I didn't feel bad for him; he broke her when she was at her lowest. He did all that to get to me. He claimed he had feelings for her, yet he didn't hesitate to hurt her, badly, just to get to me. She didn't need to forgive him. I assumed Charlie hadn't told her, since she said nothing to me, and I wasn't going to tell her either. Maybe it was fucked up to keep it from her, but it was better for her to be kept from him. He left my room and I heard him go into his.

I waited fifteen more minutes, until almost twelve-thirty in the morning. I opened my door very quietly and started down the hall. I cursed myself for keeping my shoes on, socks would have been quieter. I made it to the stairs, and saw my parents' door closed, so I kept going. I made it to the bottom of the stairs and it was pitch black in the house. I felt around and made it to the kitchen. By feeling around, I found one of the lights under the cabinets and turned it on. I thought I heard something behind me and I whipped around. There was no one there, but the hair on my neck was standing on end. I just felt as though I was being watched. I shook it off; I needed to find my fucking phone.

I saw my mom's purse sitting on the far kitchen counter. I stepped as quietly as I could, my sneakers squeaking against the tile. I quietly opened her purse and began the hunt for my phone, but it wasn't in there. I began looking through all the drawers in the kitchen. It wasn't anywhere. I snuck down the hall to her craft room. It took me for fucking ever to get there, because I was trying to be so quiet. I let out a breath when I got to the door. I twisted the knob and it was fucking locked. I muttered a "fuck" to myself and headed back to the kitchen. I would just have to use the house phone.

I made it back to the kitchen, happy that I left the light on for myself. I was impatient to hear her voice - I was sure she would be asleep - but I just wanted to let her know that I tried to be there. I reached my hand out to where the phone should've been, but there was nothing there. I squinted my eyes, trying to see in the dark and the phone was missing from the receiver. Fuck me. I leaned my head against the counter just worn out from the day. Right before I was about to stand to go back upstairs, I heard laughing from behind me. I spun around to come face to face with the fuck. That was my new name for him; he was not my father.

"Looking for this?" he asked holding the phone.

"Yeah." I wasn't gonna play his game, I knew he wasn't gonna give it to me. I went to walk around him to go back upstairs before we started to fight. He put his hand on my chest and pushed me back stopping me from getting around him.

"You listen to me, and you listen good," he hissed, leaning into me. "I'm done with you, the only reason you are around is because of your mother. You are a fuck up, a mistake, you hear me!" He still had his hand on my chest and was walking us backward until my back hit the kitchen counter. I was taking deep breaths, trying to calm down; I was so close to hitting the motherfucker.

"Here is the deal; the only thing you are good for is football, that's it. That is now your only priority. No more friends, no more job." He finished his little speech with a hard shove on my chest, slamming my lower back against the counter. A grunt escaped my lips, and he fucking laughed. He started to walk away and then turned around to face me. "And no more seeing that little fucking bitch of yours."

I fucking lost it! He can fuck with me all he wants, but there was a clear fucking line that was to not be crossed and he fucking leaped over it. I lunged at him and caught him off guard. His eyes went wide as he fell to the floor onto his back. I wasn't gonna hit him, and give him something to hold over me. I just grabbed him by the his collar and got close to his fucking face and spat, "If you ever fucking say anything about Bella again, I will fuck you up."

I pushed off of him to stand up. I wanted to spit on him so bad, but I controlled myself. I had never retaliated physically with him, and he was shocked. I could see fear in his eyes. _Good._ As I stood, he rolled over a bit and something fell out of his pocket, it was my fucking cell phone. I picked it up and started to walk away, when I realized it was on. I just assumed it was turned off. I had a few missed calls and texts from Bella earlier that evening. I was scrolling through the messages when my dad stood up behind me and lunged for me. I easily stepped to the side making him miss me all together.

I laughed at him, and it enraged him more. I decided that it wasn't smart for me to stay there for the night; I could tell he wasn't gonna stop. I went to grab my keys, but before I could, he grabbed them away from me.

"I don't think so," he said, slipping my keys into his pocket. Walking then, that's fine. I mumbled a "whatever" and went straight to the front door. I could hear him coming after me so I started to jog down the front steps.

"I'm turning the phone service off! You're done! You hear me? Done!"

I let him scream like the maniac that he was and continued to walk down the street. I tried to call Bella a few times and there was no answer. That was not normal, even if she was asleep she always answered. She lived on the opposite side of the school from me, so it would take a little while to get to her. I looked at my watch, it almost one in the morning. I wasn't sure what I was gonna do when I got there, I guessed I would climb into her window. I smiled at that thought.

It was freezing outside; there was frost on all the cars, lawns, and coating the street. At least it wasn't fucking raining. I ran out of the house so fast, I hadn't grabbed a coat. At least I was wearing a sweatshirt. I was cold as fuck, though. I just kept blowing air out of my lungs into the darkness, watching it glow from the lights from the few buildings on the street. It was a nice, clear night, and the stars looked like a low glowing ceiling. The town was dead, there was no one out. The quiet was eerie. After all of the commotion at my house, I welcomed the quiet. I couldn't enjoy it, though. I was sill wondering why Bella had not answered her phone; I just had a bad feeling.

I kept trying her cell the whole way there, but there was still no answer. I was getting more and more worried. I was about a half a mile from Bella's house when the pitch black night all of a sudden lit up. The walls of the surrounding buildings started to light up in red and white. The next thing I saw was an ambulance speeding around the corner. I stood for a second, watching it disappear into the darkness, leaving me in the cold black again. I had a horrible feeling about that ambulance and it made me pick up my speed to Bella's. Surely if something had happened, she would have called... right? When I made it within two blocks of her house, I could feel my heart rate spiking. I kept telling myself to calm the fuck down, that I was over-reacting.

Sadly, I wasn't over-reacting. What I saw when I came into a visual distance of her house stopped me in my tracks. My Bella was on her knees in the middle of the damn lawn crying... no, not crying, hysterical. Adrenalin took over and I ran the rest of the way to her. She looked up and her eyes went wide. She was probably wondering what I was doing there after one in the morning. I was wondering what the fuck she was doing in the goddamn frozen yard in thin pajamas.

"Bella, what the hell are you doing out here?" I demanded, grabbing her and picking her up off the cold ground to her feet. She screamed out in pain. She was fucking frozen. I didn't wait for an answer, I just swung her legs up off the ground and carried her to the front door that was wide open. _What the fuck happened?_ I set her on the couch and ran to the closet, grabbing blankets and shit to warm her up. I noticed that the table at the bottom of the stairs was smashed and there was a trail of blood that led to the phone in the kitchen. I looked around but I couldn't figure out what the hell happened.

I decided that getting her warm was more important than working on my fucking detective skills. I wrapped three blankets around her, and one around myself, because I was fucking freezing too. I pulled her to my lap, and she let out a noise of pain again.

"Baby, what happened? Are you hurt?"

"It doesn't matter, I have to go." She stood, almost collapsing, and screamed out in pain. I jumped up and saw blood all over her leg. I forgot about her modesty and ripped her pants down and off to see where the blood was coming from. From her upper leg, down passed her knee, she had a long gash.

"My God, Bella, what the hell happened?" I demanded.

"We fell down the stairs," she sobbed.

"Honey, what do you mean? Who is 'we', Bella?'

"My dad and me, Edward. God, I have to go, I have to get to the hospital," she said, trying to stand again. I held her down and told her no, sternly. I needed to figure what the fuck was going on and get her calmed down.

I picked her up and set her on the couch again; she was getting blood everywhere. I ran to the kitchen for a towel to stop the bleeding. When I came back she was trying to get up again.

"Bella, sit down!" I didn't mean to yell at her, but I was stressing the fuck out. Her eyes went wide and her bottom lip began to tremble. I felt like an ass.

"Honey, we have to get you to the hospital, but can you tell me what happened?" I could tell she wouldn't be able to tell the doctors what happened and I needed to know.

"I was waiting right here for you," she managed, hiccupping and using the blanket as a tissue. Fuck, she stayed up waiting. Guilt flooded my system for her, once again having to deal with situations because of my family. "My dad, he uh... came down to check on me." She started to cry again. She stopped herself and took a couple deep breaths. I rubbed her arm trying to help her.

"He uh... was going back to bed... and then. Oh God, Edward!" She broke down and started to cry, she was in a complete panic.

"What was it baby, what happened?"

"He was like up... up the stairs and just fucking stopped, he... grabbed his throat and went to his knees," she said, stopping to take a breath.

"I ran as fast as I could to catch him, but I couldn't fucking hold him, Edward. I'm sorry, I couldn't hold his weight!" She was latched on to my shirt.

"Is that what happened to your leg?" She didn't answer. "Bella, is it?"

"Yeah, I didn't even notice until you picked me up. Edward, the ambulance it took him, I have to get to the hospital!" I couldn't get her to calm, so I told her to stay put. She was in such a frazzled state that she didn't realize she was only in her underwear.

"Ok, we are going right now, baby. Now, do you have a skirt or something?" She just looked at me. "Honey, you need to keep the towel on your cut, so pants wont work." She told me where her skirts were and I ran up to get one. I got her dressed the best I could, and helped her into her dad's truck. I ran to the driver's side and tore down the road to the hospital. I needed to get her there and to a doctor. She was gonna have a shit fit when she found out I wasn't taking her to Charlie, but she needed to get checked out. I would go find out what was going on with Charlie.

When we got to the hospital, I carried her into Emergency, and, like I predicted she demanded to be brought to Charlie. Even though I didn't want to leave her, I had to, to calm her down. She needed to hear that he was ok. I just was praying to God that I would come back with that news.

I jogged around the damn hospital looking for someone to fucking tell me where he was. When I figured out that he was in the Intensive care unit (ICU), my fucking heart dropped. There were just a few people in the waiting area, and I noticed one of them was Renee; she was in her nightgown still.

"Renee?" I asked, gently tapping her shoulder. She spun around. Her eyes were wild, obviously in shock. She clung to me and started crying.

I just patted her back, I felt bad that she had no one there for her. She had been there for me so many times and I didn't mind being there for her, but I really needed to be with Bella.

"Renee, what's going on?" I was scared to ask.

"God, I don't know Edward, he couldn't breathe. That's all we know." Fuck, thank God he was still alive; I wasn't sure how I would ever be able to tell Bella that her dad was gone.

"Where's Bella?" she asked, looking behind me.

"She's down in emergency." Her eyes went wide. "No, she's ok. She cut her leg when she fell, apparently."

"I had no idea that she fell, too. It all happened so fast," she said. She was almost as panicked as Bella. "I should go down there, but the doc-" I cut her off.

"No, you stay. I will go down there and bring her up as soon as she is done." She hugged me and thanked me. I practically ran back to Bella; I couldn't stand being away from her.

They were just finishing up with her when I got there. Her eyes went wide as saucers when she saw me, her lip began to tremble, and I could tell she was expecting the worst news.

"Calm down, baby, so far, he's ok." She let out a huge breath.

Her doctor said the cut was very dirty, but didn't need stitches the whole way down, only about half of it. She was all bandaged up. I sat her in a wheel chair that a nurse brought in, and took her to where her mom was. The two embraced and cried. Not long after that, the doctor called us back. It was not Dr. Burke; it was someone we had never seen before.

She explained that while Charlie's body was accepting the new bone marrow extremely well, he had contracted a severe lung infection. She explained that it was a fungus that was fast growing in his lungs. The type of fungus was one that was common around here from the wet greenery all around. Something we all breathe in and it causes us no harm. Since he had no immune system, it attacked his system fast, making his lungs their new home. Before the doctor left, she let us know how serious it was and that Charlie couldn't have any visitors.

We were left in the room alone, all frozen, not knowing what to do next. I had forgotten all about what happened at my house. That was until two uniformed officers walked into the waiting area.

"Excuse me," one said. We all looked up.

"Are you Edward Masen?" I stood up.

"Yes."

"Son, I'm sorry, you need to come with us." I looked at him like he was fucking nuts, I wasn't going anywhere. "Your parents have reported you."

_Fuck._

_

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_**Leave me some love!**


	17. Chapter 17 Panic

**Hey Everybody! Sadly, I still own nothing :(**

**HUGE thank you to Mamma4ever for going through all these chapters and doing the job of re beta'ing them. Love you bb! **

****

I want to make clear that verbal attacks are damaging and are absolutely considered abuse, abuse does not have to leave physical marks.  
I am not a lawyer and do not know what it would take to get a child in Edward's situation to be removed from the home.  
I do however know that divorcing your parents, and proving things like verbal abuse are very hard to do. This is a story of fiction, I do not expect anyone to be quiet and stay in a damaging house hold in real life. For this work of fiction though, Edward is toughing it out at the moment.

* * *

_The cup is not half empty as pessimists say_

_as far as he sees nothing's left in the cup_

_A whole cup full of nothing for him to indulge..._

_Then in violent, frustration_

_he cries out to God or just no one..._

_is there a point to this madness_

_and all that he was is just a tragedy_

_Poetic Tragedy by The Used_

EPOV

"What do you mean they reported me?" I demanded. "Reported me for what?" I could hardly articulate my words, I was so pissed. The cop wasn't answering any of my questions. Out of frustration, I took an aggressive step toward him. I was ready to continue my rant, when Bella hobbled up beside me. She touched my arm gently, and I calmed instantly; her presence alone helped ebb my anger and panic. I inhaled, taking in a deep breath, and took a step back from the aggressive pose I had toward the cop who was doing the talking.

"Officer Dan?" Bella asked. He was the taller of the two officers. He had olive skin and short black hair; his look screamed Italian. He was the one that had been talking; he looked up from the paper in his hands.

"Bella, what are you doing here, is everything ok?" he asked in a professional manner. He looked down to the bandages on her leg and her odd attire of a dressy skirt and a night shirt. He shot me a dirty look.

"We were told to look for him at your house, and when we got there, a neighbor said that you had all headed over to the hospital. Is this because of your leg? Are you alright?" Obviously this was someone Bella knew, and it seemed like he cared about her. She probably knew every officer on the small force.

"Uh, no, we're not here for me," she said, referring to her leg. "We just got here, Char-Dad, is sick. We don't know much yet." A look of genuine concern flashed over the officer's face. Bella looked around the officer's shoulder at the other cop behind him, the one that just stood there and watched the show. Officer Dan must have seen the question in her eyes, because before she could ask he informed her, "that's Alec, he... uh, is just filling in for us. Our staff is a little short," he said with a small uncomfortable shrug. I could tell he didn't want to say out loud and remind Bella that the staff is short because of her dad's illness. She was about to ask another question right before he got back to the reason he came in the first place.

"Well, let me just take this one down and then we'll come back to check on your dad." A look of panic crossed her features. She latched onto my arm and pulled herself in front of me so that she was in between me and the officer.

"No, you can't take him," she said, with force and determination in her voice.

"I'm sorry, Bella, but we have to," he said.

"Officer, if you don't mind, what am I in trouble for?" I asked. I was trying so hard not to cop an attitude with him, and be respectful, knowing if I was a jerk to him it wouldn't help me any. I was hoping to work something out to keep my ass from going back to my parent's house or jail. Of the two, I preferred jail.

He looked from Bella, to me, and stood up a little straighter. "Well, son, we got a call from your dad saying that you had run away and were being very violent at the time you left the house," he said accusingly. I scoffed and laughed bitterly at what he said. I was being violent? Bella's eyes widened when she looked up into mine. Due to all of the chaos, I hadn't been able to explain what happened to her, and how I ended up at her house.

"I was not being violent, I ran because _he_ was being violent," I said, through gritted teeth, trying to control my anger. I knew Bella wanted me to turn my parents in, but for what exactly? I knew that no one could save me. There were no marks on me to show any abuse. What was I gonna say, 'oh officer, save me, my parents are controlling assholes, and my daddy doesn't want or love me'? No, that wouldn't work. I knew that nothing was going to change. I just needed to leave when I turned eighteen. For the time being, though, I was going to do whatever I could to stay with Bella; she needed me and I wasn't going anywhere.

"Dan, please just hear him out, his parents, they're... they're horrible." He listened to her and eyed me appraisingly, Renee walked over when she finally noticed all of the commotion.

"Dan, what are you doing here?" Renee asked, giving the same suspicious eye to the other cop behind him that Bella did.

"Mom, he wants to take Edward," Bella said, with tears in her eyes. Renee looked shocked and addressed Dan.

"What for, Dan? Edward is a good kid." I felt like shit, they were here because the person they loved the most was in the ICU, and they didn't even know if he was ok yet. Once again they had to deal with shit from my family. I felt like I should just disappear from their lives so they didn't have to deal with all the unnecessary drama that came along with me.

"Renee, his dad called in. He says that the young man got violent out of nowhere - 'hostile' is the word he used. Started pushing his father around and then fled from the house. Also, his dad says that he stole a cell phone." I couldn't hold it in, once again, I laughed. I had to turn around, take a deep breath to gain my composure.

"I don't believe that," Renee said. "Edward what happened?" She turned to me for an explanation.

"God, I don't know," I said, pulling on my hair. I couldn't believe he went this far just to punish me. "Dinner, it was... horrible. He was attacking Emmett for no reason... none. Then when I tried to stick up for him, he just lost it, like really lost it. I decided to just leave and go upstairs, let him cool off." I turned to Bella. "They took my phone, I couldn't call or come to see you, I had no way to tell you." I was starting to panic a little, realizing that I could seriously go to jail from my parents' gross exaggeration.

"It's ok, stop," she said grabbing my hands from my hair and brought them down. "Your here now, it's ok."

"Is that all that happened?" Officer Dan asked unbelieving.

"Uh no, after I went to upstairs, I waited for him to go to bed. After midnight, when I thought he was in bed, I went down to find my phone. He... he came out of nowhere and started shoving me around. I swear the only time I touched him was to get him off of me. I left because I knew that it was getting out of hand." I was having a hard time focusing, the panic making it too hard. I took a deep breath and made direct eye contact with the officer. "He doesn't stop. Once he starts, he doesn't stop. I did push him off of me, but please, I can't go to jail." I couldn't seem to stop my rambling. I was ashamed and embarrassed. I sounded like a whiney bitch, but I couldn't go to jail. I had to get this guy to hear me out.

"Well, that certainly isn't the story that he told us," he said shaking his head. "And you need to calm down, we aren't gonna take you to jail. Your dad wanted us to, but I see no reason for it."

"Dan, you can't take him back home. I have seen it first hand; these people, they aren't right. Edward is such a good kid, and I believe his version with out a shadow of a doubt." Renee said with finality in her voice, like she called the shots. It was hard not to laugh. She was still in her night dress, standing in the middle of the ICU, standing up to a cop.

"Please, Dan, he is important," Bella pleaded. The officer took a deep breath and let it out in a big sigh. He rested his hands on his belt that stored his guns and things. He hung his head down for a second, and then sighed again.

"What happened to your leg Bella?" he finally asked. She briefly explained what had happened earlier that evening. She couldn't get through the story without tears escaping her eyes. When she finished the best she could, he turned to face me.

"Is this true? You found her and brought her here?" I nodded.

"Renee, what does Charlie think of him?" he asked, nodding my direction.

"He really loves him, Dan. He's happy that Bella is with him, and I am too," she said, squeezing my arm, and giving me a sweet smile.

"Well, if Charlie likes him, and obviously he's taking care of Bella…" It seemed that he was talking more to himself than to us.

"Here's the deal, Edward, we can go one of two ways with this." He stopped and turned to face the guy standing behind him. "Alec, why don't you go down and get Mrs. Swan some coffee." He waited until Alec was out of eye sight and ear shot.

"Are you scared to go home, Edward?" Was I scared? No. I didn't want to be there, though.

"No," I said.

"Do you have any marks on you, anything you want to report? We can take you to spend the night in our juvenile center until we can figure out if you can be returned home." I knew that would never work out. My dad had expensive lawyers available at a moment's notice. There was probably a mark on my back, from where he slammed me into the counter, but I knew that would never be enough. I would end up back there and things would just be worse. I wasn't sure that foster care or some shit like that would be any better anyway.

"Uh, no I don't want to report anything." I decided that it would cause so many more problems. Only six more months, that was it. I could get through it.

"You sure, Edward?" Dan asked again. He really seemed like a decent guy.

"Yeah."

"Alright, I'm gonna walk out of here, call your dad and let him know that we couldn't find you. You get your ass home before the sun comes up, understand?" I was shocked; he would do that for me? I was nodding my head agreeing to all of his terms. He motioned for me to step aside from Bella and Renee.

"I am doing this because Bella obviously needs you, don't make me regret it," he said pointedly, looking sternly into my eyes.

"I won't, thank you sir." He gave me his card and told me to call him if things ever reached the point that I needed help. After our little pow-wow, he walked back over to Bella and Renee. They thanked him profusely and he got the update on what was going on with Charlie.

After he left, I apologized to Renee and Bella for what had happened. They brushed me off, saying that it wasn't my fault. Bella and her mom were both very disturbed from hearing details of my Thanksgiving. I didn't even tell them the things he had said, I didn't want them to know.

After all the drama, I realized that it was already after four in the morning. The doctor had come back, letting us know that we would not be allowed to see Charlie until he was completely stable. She encouraged them to go home and get some sleep. I knew them well enough to know that it would never happen. I was able to at least talk them into letting me drive them home so they could shower and change into normal clothing.

Because Renee rode in the ambulance with Charlie, and Bella rode in the truck with me, we only had one car to get home in. We all squeezed in the little cab and made our way back to Bella's. When we got back to the house, Renee went right upstairs to shower. I needed to leave soon, to comply with what Officer Dan said. Bella and I were just sitting quietly on the couch. I thought she was asleep until she started talking to me.

"That was really nice of Dan to help us out," she said.

"It was," I agreed. "How long have you known him?"

"Uh, forever, really. Well, ever since I can remember. He's the under sheriff, one of Dad's best friends," she explained. That made his concerned behavior make sense.

"He seems like a nice guy," I said.

"He is." There was a long silence again after that. Once again, I assumed that she had fallen asleep. I started to nod off when her voice woke me.

"Edward," I looked down to where her head lay in my lap. Her eyes were all red with dark circles underneath them. I'm sure I looked similar to her. Neither of us had been to bed yet.

"What, baby, does your leg hurt?" My voice was raspy and thick with exhaustion.

"Uh, no...well, yeah, a little, but that's not what I was gonna say." I just waited for her to continue. "I don't want you to go back home." When she saw that I was about to tell her it was fine, she cut me off before I could even speak. "No, really, please don't go back," she pleaded. I had to go back, there was no choice. I could run away, yes, but we both knew that would be a very stupid choice to make.

"Bella, I have to go back, you know I do." She looked up at me. Tears started streaming down her cheeks. This was too much; she couldn't deal with her dad and all my shit at the same time. I needed to figure out a way to distance myself so that they weren't involved in all this fucked up shit.

"Stop crying...please," I pleaded in a soft whisper. I couldn't stand to see her cry.

"I'm gonna go back, probably get grounded and move on. I'm not in danger or anything, I can handle myself." She just eyed me doubtfully. After that she lay in silence, exhaustion taking over. After a few more minutes I heard the shower turn off upstairs and woke Bella up so she could jump in. I wanted to let her sleep, but knew that she would be angry for me not waking her.

"I have to get home, but I'll call you as soon as I can." Reminding her that I was leaving caused her tears to start all over again. She leaned forward resting her head on my chest her arms hung limply at her side, she looked totally defeated.

"Don't cry, please," I begged again, rubbing my hands up and down her arms. My resolve to leave was weakening. I already had no desire to go home, and with her like that, it made it so much worse. I knew if I didn't leave right then, the sun would be up and I would break the deal with Officer Dan, which meant shit would get a lot worse.

"If they make you stay home, I won't see you until after Thanksgiving break, that's almost a week," she said. She was right. I knew already that I would be on lock down; there was no question about it.

"I promise I will find a way to get to you, no matter what I have to do." I leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead. I would leave in the middle of the night; I would do whatever I had to, to get to her. This was the worst possible time for something like this to happen. I honestly didn't know if Charlie was going to make it. We had left the ICU with no answers really, and now my cell was turned off. She would have no way to get a hold of me, so I would have to try to check in with her as often as I would be able to.

"Just go take a shower and relax as much as you can, I'll be back the second I can." She looked at me doubtfully. She was so upset and I knew it wasn't just about me getting in trouble. She was worried about my dad doing something to me, I wasn't, I could take him, and I would call the number that the cop gave me if I had to. Bella already made me promise that I would. Most of all, she was worried about her dad. She was the one with him when he fell, and when he was taken away. She was in a terrifying situation, without any answers. It was easier for her to focus on my problems than to face the fact that her dad may not be ok.

Renee walked down the stairs, dressed in normal clothes, with a bag in her hand. Obviously she planned on staying overnight at the hospital. There was no way that the ICU would let more than one person stay, if that. I didn't want Bella to stay alone. I hoped that she could have Alice come stay with her, or her stay there.

"Edward, I'll take you home while Bella showers. Bella, I'll come back and pick you up and we'll go to the hospital." Renee offered.

"No, it's ok, I can walk. You guys just get back there." I didn't want them wasting any more time on me.

"It wasn't a question, Edward, your not walking. It's pitch black and frozen out there. I'm ready to go and will have to wait for Bella anyway." I knew there was no talking her out of it. I gave Bella a kiss and left her in the living room, tears running down her cheeks. The sight killed me. It took everything I had to walk out the door. I walked down the driveway and got into the passenger side of the truck. It was still dark out, but we were just on the cusp of the sunrise. The world around me was frozen, cold and silent. It made the situation feel much more desolate. A couple minutes later Renee got into the driver's seat of the truck.

"Brrrrr, it's so cold, let's get this heat on," she said, as she started the truck. We sat in a comfortable silence while she let the truck heat up. Every once in a while she would yawn or rub a hand over her face. She was exhausted.

"Ok, I think it's warm enough," she said as she started to pull out of the driveway.

"Thanks for taking me home."

"Edward, it's no trouble, are you gonna be ok?" she asked.

"Yeah, he gets really pissed, but once he gets over it, it's fine." I could tell she didn't believe my lie by the incredulous look she gave me.

"Make sure you call Bella tomorrow so we know that everything is ok."

"I'll try, but he turned my cell off, so I'm not sure I'll be able to get to a phone." She looked over at me in shock.

"He turned it off?" I nodded yes. She let out a big sigh, and started to dig in her coat pocket, steering the truck with her knee. She pulled out a silver phone and handed it to me.

"Here, can you hide this from them?"

"No, I can't take your phone, you need it." I was not taking her phone. Even though I wished someone like her was my mom, she wasn't. It wasn't her job to take care of me.

"Just like the ride home Edward, I wasn't asking you. Take the phone." I could hear the finality in her voice, she wasn't taking no for an answer.

"If something happens with your parents-"

"They won-" I tried to cut her off, but she continued before I could.

"Listen, if something does happen I want you to have an emergency phone." I was going to try to decline it again, but she put her hand up to stop me. "It's fine, I'll add a new one to our plan. As long as you're not calling China or something, it will only be ten more dollars a month. It's no problem, I want to you to have it." She gave me the most sincere smile. I couldn't say no. I could hide it in my room and keep it off or on silent when I was around my family. This way Bella could call me if she needed to and I could check on her, with out getting caught sneaking out.

"Thank you, Renee, I want to pay for it, though." She shook her head. "Yes, I have a job, that's the only way I'll accept it, please let me pay for it." I wasn't a free loader, it was only ten bucks, but I wanted to cover it.

"Fine, Edward. Ten bucks a month, but that's it." By the time we were done with our conversation we were at the end of my driveway. I was gonna walk up the long drive so that my parents didn't see Renee and try to start something with her, that was the last thing she needed.

"Good luck. Please have Bella call me as soon as you guys know something," I pleaded getting out of the truck. She promised me she would and thanked me for finding Bella and taking her to the hospital. After shutting the car door, I stood in the frozen cold, watching the truck's break lights disappear into the darkness. As soon as it rounded the corner, everything was dark, eerie, and quiet; the only light coming from the house behind me. I turned to face it and started the walk up the driveway to face my reality.

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**Let me know what you think!**


	18. Chapter 18 The Arms of the One you Love

**Thanks to Mamma4ever for doing the beta work!**

**Mature content ahead... you have been warned :)**

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**Please please, listen to this song while reading this chapter, I had it on repeat while writing this chapter. It is one of the most beautiful songs I have heard.  
If you need a link there is one on my profile :)**

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But I promise you this,

I'll always look out for you.

That's what I'll do.

My heart is yours.

It's you that I hold on to.

That's what I'll do.

But I know I was wrong,

And I won't let you down.

(Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, yeah I will, yes I will…)

But I'll sing "oh"

I cry "oh"

Yeah I saw sparks,

Yeah I saw sparks,

And I saw sparks,

Yeah I saw sparks,

Singing out.

Sparks by Coldplay

BPOV

I looked at the calendar on my wall, and it told me that it was December sixteenth. I moved my gaze from the calendar to the window. Everything was either frozen or covered in snow. It had been this way for a few days, and showed no signs of changing anytime soon. I was just sitting on the edge of my bed, staring out the window, having no motivation to do anything else. The front yard looked like a frozen graveyard of sorts. Every tree was stripped bare; their colorful leaves had long since abandoned the branches. It looked desolate... but in a beautiful sort of way. There were no cars on the road, everyone stayed in if they could. There was an eerie peace that came along with the winter wasteland.

I turned from the window and looked at my clock on the wall. Letting out a big sigh, I realized that I needed to leave for school within five minutes to get there on time. I didn't care if I was late; I found that I didn't care about much those days. Edward had to be on time though, and so, for him, I made myself be punctual. After the horrible incident on Thanksgiving night, Edward had his car, along with everything else imaginable, taken away from him.

They were making him walk to school, not even willing to drive him. Having no bus stop near his house he had no other option but to walk. The winter conditions were miserable, and there was no way I was going to let him walk everyday. I was meeting him a block from the end of his driveway everyday to take him to school, and I would drop him off at home after school. We had to be careful that his parents didn't see him in my car; he wasn't allowed to see me anymore. Not after _that_ night.

Edward would never tell me exactly what happened when he went home that night after the cops came to the hospital. He just said there was a lot of yelling. He promised me that nothing had gotten physical, and I believed him. He wouldn't lie to me.

Football season was finished. The only senior players that were continuing to train were those that were planning on playing in college. Edward made it clear that he refused to do so. The continued football training wouldn't start until after New Year's. I knew that he hadn't told his dad that he wouldn't be playing yet, and I was terrified of what would happen when he did. Edward tried to reassure me repeatedly, telling me that there was nothing more that they could do. They had taken away his car, cell, computer, job and our relationship. He insisted that there was nothing left to take away.

He had found a way to still be content without most of the things that had been taken away. The one thing, besides our time together, that he had been mourning the most was; his music. They had taken away every single musical item from him; including his iPod and all of his CDs. I got an ache in my chest every time I thought about it. He went home to a completely bare, empty room and had no one to communicate with. Thank God he had the cell phone that my mom gave him; that had been a life saver. We really couldn't talk much, though, because he couldn't be caught with that.

I didn't know if it was him, me, or just the whole fucked up situation, but we had been so distant from each other and it was killing me. It wasn't just Edward that I had grown away from, though. I had felt myself become distant from all of those around me. Alice was so busy trying to ace all of her classes for her senior year, so that she could leave for college. I knew that I could reach out to her for support, but had chosen not to. I just had no desire to continue the friendships that I had started with Angela and Rose. They were both great people, and if we had met before all of this, we could have been great friends. I knew I was making myself an island, but I couldn't stop, I wanted to be alone.

I didn't want to say that I was depressed, but I felt very... exhausted. Not in the way that I needed sleep, although I did. More in a way that I was just too tired. So freaking tired. It was too much to deal with anything else on top of what I was dealing with my Dad and Edward. Every day after I dropped Edward off after school, I would go straight to the hospital, where I would be until they kicked me out. Yes, Charlie was still in the hospital, still in the ICU. The infection in his lungs had spread at an ungodly fast speed.

One lung was still fighting; the other… well, it had been completely taken over by the fungus that had embedded itself inside his body. The doctors had reassured us that the transplant was a success in the fact that his body was making no effort to reject the new bone marrow. With the looming infection, though, it made no difference if the bone marrow was accepted or rejected. If they were able to get his lungs clear, he would be good to go; however, it just wasn't that easy. Because the infection was so aggressive, they had him in a medically induced coma. He'd been that way since Thanksgiving night. It just seemed as though he was sleeping all the time. The doctors felt that his body would have more of a chance to fight the infection if it wasn't working so hard on the most basic of tasks, like breathing. In less than a month of being in a coma, his body had become noticeably frailer from the lack of use. I spent time with him everyday, and still I was shocked at how frail he looked; more and more each day.

With one more look from the window to the clock, I realized that if I didn't leave right then I would get Edward to school late and he would have hell to pay. I grabbed my school bag and coat, and headed downstairs. I was wearing jeans and the warmest sweatshirt I owned. I didn't give a crap what I looked like; I just wanted to be warm. On my way down the stairs, I threw my hair in a ponytail, not even bothering to check and see if it looked ok. There was a note from my mom on the counter saying that she was at the hospital this morning and would be at work all night. I felt so bad for her; she was still working and spending every free moment at the hospital with Dad. She tried so hard to be optimistic about everything, saying that a positive attitude helped so much, but I couldn't fake it anymore; I wasn't positive about anything.

I slipped and fell _two_ fucking times on the way to the truck, cursing into the nothingness around me each time. I looked at the black pavement in front of my house, it sparkled. The roads looked slick. Usually my dad would have chains on whatever car I was driving, but he wasn't there to do it. That thought alone brought hot tears to my eyes. I switched my train of thought to the next person that would help, Edward. Edward was capable, but got caught when he tried to sneak over here to do it. He ended up in a verbal battle with his mom over that one. He had called Jasper and he gladly came over here and not only put them on for me, but taught me how to do it as well. It was a very sweet thing, Jasper helping, but I was bitter that the two men in my life that were supposed to be here, were taken away from me.

Once I finally made it inside the truck, I started it and pulled out of the driveway, having no time to let it warm up. I went as fast as the slick roads would allow, and headed toward the one person that made me feel better.

I was still about two blocks from where Edward always met me everyday when I saw his form walking down the two-lane road. I stopped as fast as I could in the icy conditions, my tires struggling to grip the ice, even with the chains. Once I slowed, I pulled over to the side of the road as much as I could. Edward jogged over to the passenger's side and jumped in.

"Honey, what are you doing here?" he asked. He had on a grey hat and his cheeks and nose were bright red. I was confused and I knew it showed on my face. _It was Monday, right? _I dropped him off Friday and told him I would be here like I had been for the past few weeks.

"What do you mean? I'm picking you up for school," I replied a little irritated. I had been losing my patience easily, as of late, and it had caused some tension to grow between us.

"Did you not get my text?" he asked. I felt in my coat pockets, trying to find my phone to see if I missed a message from him. Finding nothing in my pockets, I realized that I left the phone at home in my rush to get out.

"I must have forgotten my phone, why what's wrong?" The words came out sounding irritated, I just wanted him to tell me already.

"No, nothing's wrong, I just didn't want you driving out here on the ice, it's not safe. I was just going to walk." For the love of God, was he kidding? I tried to control the anger that was coming as an automatic response, but I failed.

"Oh, because walking on a two lane road with no shoulder where cars are driving on the ice is safe?" I snapped harshly, and gave him an incredulous look, rolling my eyes. "It's fine, Jasper came over Saturday and put the chains on." I added softly, feeling like complete crap for being rude to him. We were silent for a long time. We just sat in the truck, off to the side of the road. I could tell that he felt a sting from my words. His posture was ridged and his jaw was stiff. He took a deep breath before he spoke to me.

"I just don't want you to get into an accident," he said quietly. I could tell he was trying really hard to control his anger and not say something rude back at me. I felt bad that I had snapped at him when he was just trying to watch out for me. I was afraid that I had been doing that a lot lately. It had been causing little arguments here and there between us. I knew it was my fault. Edward tried so hard to be patient with me, but he could only take so much. I felt like shit, he didn't deserve any of my attitude. I felt like I was losing me - the person I was. All the bullshit just eating me away, piece by piece, maybe I was depressed? I rested my head on my steering wheel feeling defeated.

"I'm so sorry, Edward. I don't know what's wrong with me, I didn't mean to snap at you, but it's fine for me to drive," I said. He lifted he hand and brushed some of the hair out of my face. When I felt how freezing cold his hand was I turned the heat up.

"It's fine, baby," he said leaning over kissing my head. I knew I was forgiven; Edward was too good to me. We needed to move on with our morning, so I got the truck turned around and headed towards the school in silence.

"How was your weekend?" I asked, just trying to break the silence, to make small talk.

"Uh, it was fine, didn't do anything. Were you at the hospital?" I just nodded. I didn't want to talk about the hospital. The ICU waiting room was the single most depressing place in the world. People in hysterics over a loved one that had just died, or people snapping, no longer able to take the stress. Some days there was no one in the waiting room with me, that was almost the worst, I felt so alone. Edward's voice brought me out of my musings.

"My dad left yesterday, he's gone through Christmas," he said all of a sudden, with a huge smile. It was so nice to see him smile; I hadn't seen it much anymore.

"That's awesome!"

"Oh, it gets better. My mom is gonna go meet him for Christmas so that he isn't alone. She's leaving Emmett as her spy to make sure I stay on lockdown." He still had that ridiculous smile on his face. _Why? _I thought. That was horrible. When he saw my expression, he must have understood what I was thinking, because he explained his train of thought to me.

"There is no way in hell, after everything that he did, Emmett would even think of ratting me out. First of all, he knows I would beat him, and second; he owes me." He didn't say how he owed him and I didn't ask, but now my smile matched his. Finally, a bit of light in our dark future.

"So, what? Are you gonna come over Christmas day?" I asked excitedly. He shook his head. I was confused. He could see me and just _wasn't_ going to?

"No, you didn't let me finish. She's going to be gone the whole Christmas break. I'll just crash on Jasper's couch. Home is the last place I want to be." I was beyond thrilled. I hoped that with that week together we could get things back to the way they were before. I knew my mom may even say yes to letting Edward stay at our place a couple of nights; she didn't want Edward to be at his house anymore than I did.

A phantom pain shot through my heart. I felt terrible to assume that it would just be Mom, Edward and me for Christmas, but with the way things were looking, it seemed that it was just going to be that way. I didn't see Charlie being out of the hospital by then. I was going to start crying if I focused on the possibility of the first Christmas without my dad being home, so I focused my thoughts on my free week with Edward.

All the tension and distance that I felt had been between Edward and me seemed to lessen in that moment. We were both on a high about our upcoming week. He grabbed my hand and we walked into the school. We went through the whole day with a more positive outlook.

Once again, I found myself sitting on my bed staring out the window. I glanced at the calendar; it said December twentieth. I was staring out the window, waiting for a familiar figure to come walking down the street. It was dark and the weather was awful. The snow was blowing fiercely from the wind and the sky looked angry. I was going to go pick Edward up for our week together; but he refused. The storm had gotten bad and he would not back down, insisting that I stay in the house and not drive. This just left me sitting worried about him walking in the dark.

I sat on my bed, my leg was bouncing nervously. I was worried about him walking. Not only because it was freezing cold, but also because it was dangerous. The roads were so dark and icy, and there was no walking space on them. As the minutes passed, I started to bite my nails. I was just about to get into my truck and go look for him when my phone rang. I grabbed it and answered, without even looking at the screen to see who it was.

"Hello." My voice sounded panicked even to my own ears.

"Bella, are you ok?" It was just my mom.

"Uh, yeah I was just hoping you were Edward," I said.

"Well, sorry to disappoint," she laughed. "Is he not there yet?"

"No."

"That's why I was calling. I really don't want you to drive in this. I'm going to spend the night here, there is no way my car will make it home," she explained.

"I'm not driving, he insisted on walking, and now he still isn't here." I sounded whiney, but I didn't care I was worried.

"Well, I'm sure he's fine. If you don't see him in the next hour, give Dan a call. Don't you go out on your own." When I didn't respond, she added, "Promise me, Bella, that you'll stay in."

"I'll try." If he was missing, there was no way I was just sitting there.

"Bella, dammit! I am already sitting in ICU, don't add yourself to the mix, too," she snapped. I felt bad, I was being selfish. I shouldn't have even said anything.

"I know, Mom, sorry. I promise I'll stay in. How's Dad?" There was really no point to asking anymore, nothing seemed to change, not for worse or for the better. I felt like he was in limbo, I just wanted him better.

"The same, Bella, still the same," she said with a sigh, obviously just as upset as I was.

"Just stay home, though, the storm is going to stay strong for a while. I have my overnight bag here and I will stay until it passes. Have Edward stay with you. The news said that the snow was too heavy on some of the old power lines, and the power could go out, I don't want you alone." _Have Edward stay here? No problem_. I thought with a huge smile growing on my face.

"Ok, I'm sure he can, I don't think Jasper will care." I didn't care if Jasper cared, if I could have Edward with me all night, then he was staying. We said our goodbyes and I went back to my spot on my bed staring out my window.

Not five minutes after hanging up the phone, the noise from my stereo went fuzzy and all the lights flashed, and then suddenly everything shut off. I screamed loudly. As embarrassed as I was to admit it, I was terrified of the dark. I felt like such a damn baby, I was shaking and scared to move around the dark house by myself. I had no choice, though; I had to find a flashlight or something. I started to head out of my room to go to the kitchen in search of candles, matches, some source of light. I let my hands lead me as I felt the wall for guidance. Every little creek of the stairs and every tap from the branches hitting the window made me jump.

"Stop, Bella, you're being fucking ridiculous." Talking out loud, filling the space with noise, seemed to help. Even as crazy as it sounded and as I probably looked.

After what seemed like a lifetime, I blindly felt my way to the kitchen. I started opening every drawer, my fingers feeling around for a flashlight or matches, anything to give me some light. Nothing.

"Dammit!" I shouted into the darkness. Dad had a safety kit somewhere in the house, but apparently I was using selective hearing when he told me about it, because I hadn't had a clue where it was.

I decided that I would head back upstairs to search my mom and dad's room, thinking that maybe the emergency kit would be there. I turned to face the living room, sticking my hands out in front of me to once again lead me blindly through the house. I was almost out of the kitchen when there was a loud banging on the door. I screamed at the top of my lungs almost fell over backwards. My stomach dropped, and it felt like I had jumped out of my skin.

The next thing I heard was more pounding and, "Bella! Bella, answer the door, are you ok!" Thank God, Edward made it. "I'm coming, I'm fine!" I shouted, and I picked up my pace blindly trying to get to the door. I ran into the couch and a table, but I finally made it to the front door.

I was flooded with relief when I opened the door and saw him standing out there all wrapped up in his winter gear, a bag in his hand. I threw myself at him.

"Hey, are you ok?" he asked, softly walking us in and shutting the door with his foot.

"Yeah, especially now that you're here, I was worried." He felt frozen to the core and he was soaking wet. I continued to hug him, not caring that I was getting wet. I didn't want to let go. I laid my head on his chest, inhaling his scent; I could smell winter on his clothes.

"How long has the power been out? The whole street is black," he said. I stepped back from him and looked out the window; it was completely black, and it was an odd sight. It looked like dead air outside, no life coming from any house.

"Uh, I don't even know, maybe fifteen minutes?" My whole being was relaxed now that he was here. When I came back from the window, I noticed then he was shaking.

"Oh my God, you must be so cold, let's get you in a shower. There should be enough hot water for you to take a quick one," I suggested.

"Yeah, that sounds really good, actually. Let's find a flashlight and candles first, though," he said. I would like to think of myself as independent, but in that moment I was never happier with Edward's take charge attitude. I loved that he wanted to take care of me. We both navigated our way through the dark, back to the kitchen. Edward searched with purpose, no fear present. It made me feel silly with how petrified I was before he got there. Within five minutes, he had found both candles and a flashlight. With our new device, the trip up the stairs was a much easier one than I had experienced coming down. We made it to the bathroom and lit the seven or so candles that we had found, and set them on the counter. The bathroom was bathed in a beautiful glow from the flames.

"I am so damn cold," Edward said shivering. I started to help him peal the layers of his wet clothing away. His skin was ice cold and his cheeks were pink, I knew he needed to get warmed up fast. I grabbed the flashlight and all of his clothes, throwing them in the washer, knowing I couldn't do them until the power came back on. When I walked back into the bathroom, Edward was naked, pulling towels out of the cabinet. His beauty shocked me motionless. I had seen him naked before, but not often. In the candle glow of the room, his pale skin and lean muscles were all that more appealing. His shoulder blades defined, the muscles in his arms lean, but strong. When he turned to face me, I had to force my jaw to remain closed. His chest was flawless, and my eyes wondered down to the fine patch of hair that was just above his manhood. When my eyes rested on his most private part, I found myself grow timid, still not used to seeing him in that state of undress. The silence seemed so loud that I spoke just to fill the space.

"I talked to my mom, she said to have you stay the night," I said looking at the ground, shy all of a sudden. He didn't respond, so I looked up. He was looking at me like I had three heads.

"Well that's good, 'cause I had no plans whatsoever to go out into that storm again," he said, laughing.

"Is she at the hospital?" I nodded. "So, she's staying there then?" he asked slowly, his voice low.

Again, I nodded. I knew he was thinking the same thing that I was. We had the dark house all to ourselves. I knew I should feel guilty for even thinking of taking advantage of the situation, but I couldn't find it in me to feel anything of the sort. I loved Edward so much, and with everything that had been going on I just wanted to show him, make sure he still knew.

He reached for another towel holding it up in my direction. "Do... you, uh... wanna take a shower with me?" he asked, his voice raspy all of a sudden. I smiled and started taking my clothes off, not bothering to answer him.

Before I got very far, he stepped forward. "Let me," he said. He helped lift my shirt over my head. I had no bra on, because I was already in my loungewear for the night. I heard him take in a quick breath and groan when he realized I had nothing on under my shirt. He leaned, in placing both of his freezing hands on either side of my face and kissed me slowly. His mouth and skin were so cold against mine, which had been warmed by being in the house all night; the contrast between the two burned a fire within me. I wanted to warm him, give him something he needed. I leaned in, pressing our naked chests together, my nipples going hard immediately against his cold chest.

He let another low groan in my mouth and moved his hands so that one was pressed flat against my back and the other firmly on my covered ass. Apparently, he didn't like that it was covered, because his hand quickly moved to the waist band, slipping the cotton pants down my legs. I stepped out of them while still keeping our mouths connected in the sweet kiss that had continued.

Even with my full body heat pressed against him, I could feel the tremors still going through him from the cold. I reluctantly broke the kiss, knowing he never would, to turn on the shower water. I prayed that there would be enough hot water to warm him up. As I leaned over the tub to adjust the knobs, a jolt of insecurity went through me. I could feel his eyes burning into my bare backside. I let my hair fall to one side trying to create a barrier to hide the insecurities I was feeling. Before I could even turn around, his cold hands were around my waist.

"Please don't hide or be shy around me, you are so beautiful. I love you so much," he finished the sentence, and started feathering kisses down my back.

"I love you, too." The words came out, barely in whisper. I was never more certain about the words themselves; I was just having a hard time putting coherent sentences together. He let go of my waist and stepped into the shower, reaching his hand out to help me in as well. It was an awkward thing at first, showering with someone. It was an activity I had done only on my own for my whole life, so to share the space felt a little odd. All the insecurities and awkwardness washed down the drain, with the water, as soon as Edward's hands were on my bare hips.

"Bella, open your eyes," he commanded softly. I didn't even realize that they were closed. I opened them and stood in awe watching the water ripple over his shoulders and down his perfect chest only to get lost in the hair above his manhood that was now very large and very hard. He pulled me close to him, and I could feel it stiff against the low part of my stomach. I sighed into his chest, I had felt so close to him, but I wanted to feel closer. My heart was his, and I wanted him to know.

I started laying small, light kisses down his chest and continued down until I was on my knees, his length directly in front of me. I felt his hands, now warm, go to my hair.

"Bella, you don't have to," he said in a strained whisper.

I looked up at him from my position on my knees, "I know, I want to." I placed a feather light kiss to the tip, before taking him into my mouth, as much as I could.

"Fuckkk" Edward hissed out, his grip in my hair instinctively tightening. I loved it, he had no idea how much I loved it. He was always so controlled, trying to never curse around me. I loved when he couldn't hold it in, hearing him lose control because of what I was doing to him, it turned me on more than anything else. I could feel him twitching in my mouth and getting close. I pumped him faster with my mouth, adding my hand to stoke what I couldn't fit. He came in long spurts down my throat. I swallowed, trying not to gag and embarrass myself. I had gone down on Edward before, but never swallowed. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.

He had just finished, I had not even stood up yet when the water went from warm to ice fucking cold; it was so cold it took my breath away.

"Jesus Christ!" Edward screamed pulling out of my mouth to turn the water off. He turned around and helped me to my feet, jumping out of the shower and quickly wrapping me up in a towel before doing the same to himself.

"You have no idea, at all, how amazing that was," he said, leaning in to kiss me. I kissed him back rubbing my arms down his back, happy to feel that he was now warm.

"C'mon, let's get into bed," he said, leading me out of the bathroom, with the flashlight. I sat on the bed with the towel wrapped around me.

"I'm gonna get the candles, don't put any clothes on," he said into my ear, nibbling on it before he walked away, leaving me a trembling, breathless heap on the bed. A few minutes later, my room was bathed in a soft candlelight. Edward, during one of his trips from the bathroom, had lost his towel. He came up to me, taking my towel and discarding it to the floor. I pulled the covers on my bed back and we both slid in. We quickly molded our bodies together trying to keep the heat in. We just lay there, looking at each other, a soft touch here and there.

"How long do you think the house will stay warm?" I asked, worried that we would freeze to death in the night.

"We'll be fine until morning. If the power's still out tomorrow, I'll go and try to find some kind of heater that runs on a generator or something. You know, you probably have the only house with no fire place," he said with a chuckle. I laughed back, it was true, it seemed they just forgot to put one in when the house was built.

"How have you been?" he asked out of nowhere, rubbing my back softly.

"Um, fine I guess," I said, not knowing how to answer.

"Tell me everything. I feel like we haven't really talked in forever."

That's exactly what we did for at least an hour, talked like we used to. There were tears on my part, and anger from both of us, over what we were both going through. I felt a thousand pounds lighter once I had told him everything. I was so happy that he had opened up with me as well. Telling me, in all honesty, exactly how miserable he was at home. For the first time, I felt he wasn't holding back to protect me. It seemed like he really needed to talk about stuff, _even though he would never admit it._ It felt good to feel like he needed me. The distance that I had been feeling had completely disappeared. After we both got everything off our chests we just lay there. I had a feeling of peace wash over me.

The room was getting darker, some of the candles having burned out. I was worried that the moment we had was passing with the candlelight.

"I love you... _so much._" I just felt like I had to say it, all of the apologies I wanted to give him, everything I had tried to express, wrapped up in one sentence.

"I love you, Bella, more than you know," he said, rolling over so he was on top of me. His eyes were smoldering and full of lust. We started kissing and his hand was roaming my body freely. I felt my self get wet. I reached a hand down to grasp him. He stopped me lifting my arm gently over my head, locking our fingers together. With his other hand, I felt him slip a finger between my folds and into me. I moaned softly, grinding against him to find more friction.

"So wet," he whispered into the darkness.

We became a tangled mess of groping, stroking, kissing and moaning. I was close to tears with the love I felt for him. In that moment, it was just him and me. No sick parents, no crazy parents, just us.

"Edward." His mouth was licking and sucking on my breast. His other hand still locked with mine above my head. He paused and looked up into my eyes.

"I'm ready," it was all that needed to be said.

"Are you sure, baby?" he asked, his eyes hooded with lust, his voice thick and velvety.

"Never been more sure of anything." It was true, I loved him and I wanted it more than anything. I needed it; I needed to be close to him.

He slowly kissed his way from my breast up my neck to my lips. By the time our lips touched I could feel the tip of him against my sex. I was nervous, not knowing what to expect. It helped so much to know that he was probably feeling the same way.

"You ready?" he asked in a hushed voice. I looked into his eyes seeing nothing but love in his. I nodded and he started to slide in slowly.

I felt my body instantly stiffen at the intrusion.

"Relax," he whispered softly into my ear. I took a deep breath as he slowly went a little further.

"Fuck, Bella... Jesus..." He trailed off. When he reached my resistance he stopped his movements completely.

"Are you ok?" he asked, I couldn't find words, so I just nodded.

"I really don't want this to hurt you, but I think it might," he said, sounding pained. I wasn't sure if it was from the thought of hurting me, or the strain it was taking to keep himself still.

"It's ok, just do it." I thought that the faster it was done, the better. He leaned forward kissing my forehead. "I love you," he said and with a swift thrust he was in. He groaned in pleasure and I winced in pain. I felt myself stretching to take him all in.

He paused again; I could feel his arms shake a little from the strain to keep himself from moving.

"I'm fine, go ahead." I was fine, yes, it hurt, but it was bearable and lessening each moment. As he started to move, I focused on the moment and not the pain. I listened to the little noises he was making and the look on his face. I could tell he felt the same way that I did. Everything was right; we were meant to be together. Not knowing exactly what to do, I tried to move with him.

"Fuck," he moaned out. Gauging from his reaction, I kept meeting his thrusts. We found a steady pace and moved together, kissing and letting each other know how much we loved the other, not only with our words, but also with our actions.

When the pain finally subsided, I enjoyed it, feeling his weight on top of me, him stretching me, moving inside of me. I never expected having sex to feel so emotional. I had never felt so close to another person, and knew I never would with anyone except Edward.

"God, Bella...I can't...fuck, I love you so much," he groaned in pleasure as he released inside of me, collapsing on top me of me. I could feel his body heat on my chest, it felt so nice. We lay there in silence for a moment, and I ran my hand up and down his back. He shifted his weight so that he was propped up on one arm looking down at me, we were still connected.

"Are you ok?" he asked, looking worried, moving hair out of my face.

"More than ok, that was...it was..." I had no word for it.

He just laughed "I know exactly what you mean. Did I hurt you, though?"

"It hurt a little, but I expected to." He looked at me like I was lying to him.

"No, don't do this, that was the best thing ever. Please don't torture yourself by thinking you hurt me, I would do it all over again...and again," I insisted. He was protective and I loved that about him, but I just wanted him to enjoy this moment with me and not worry.

"That's good 'cause I plan to do it again, and again," he said with a smirk. He rolled off and out of me and we both groaned at the loss of contact.

He got out of bed, grabbed the flash light and headed out the bedroom door. I was too busy ogling his ass to ask him where he was going. He came back a second later with a washcloth in his hands, and he sat on the edge of the bed.

"Open your legs, baby" he said, and I complied.

"Sorry it's not warmer," he said, as he slid the cool cloth over my folds and down my leg; cleaning the evidence of my virginity away.

"It's ok, the cool feels kinda nice." After he had me all cleaned up, he rummaged through his bag, to find some dry clothes. He stood me up, putting one of his t-shirts on me from his bag, and slipping some boxers on himself. We quickly changed my sheets to clean, crisp ones and crawled back into bed. The lack of heat, and the chill of the room, was already noticeable. We snuggled close to keep warm. I heard him whisper that he loved me. That was the last thing I heard before I feel asleep.

We woke up freezing in the middle of the night, and decided that the best way to stay warm was to just go ahead and have sex again. It hurt less that time, but I could tell I would be sore in the morning. After the second time, I lay on top of his chest, indeed feeling much warmer.

For the past month or so, I had fallen asleep to a symphony of my own cries, cries for my dad, cries for Edward, cries of pure frustration. Not that night, that night I fell asleep in the arms of the love of my life, happy. I decided in that moment that I would no longer give up and be distant. I needed Edward like I needed air. I would let him in and let him be there for me, I would be there for him as well. Together we would be able to face what tomorrow held; I hoped anyway.

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	19. Chapter 19 Christmas in the ICU

**Huge thank you to Mamma4ever for her awesome Beta work! **

**And WO for pre reading! **

**Thanks to everyone that reads and reviews! **

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_And it came to me then_

_That every plan is a tiny prayer to Father Time_

_As I stared at my shoes in the ICU_

_That reeked of piss and 409_

_And I rationed my breaths as I said to myself_

_That I'd already taken too much today_

_As each descending peak on the LCD_

_Took you a little farther away from me_

_Away from me_

_What Sarah Said by Death Cab for Cutie _

EPOV

It was Christmas Eve, the snow and ice from the storm last week was gone, leaving bare landscape behind. While my parents were gone, Renee had let me stay on their couch, never making me go to Jasper's. Well, some nights I stayed on the couch, oh fuck it, I never slept on the damn couch once; _sorry Renee. _After the night I had lost my virginity and took Bella's, I hadn't been able to stay away from her. Every night, I had snuck up into her room and took her again. I had told her over and over that we didn't have to, that I would just hold her. She had insisted that she wanted to, that it gave her comfort. Some nights Renee had been at the hospital, and when she wasn't, we were. We behaved at the hospital, though.

The situation was depressing. Charlie wasn't getting better; in fact, he was getting worse day by day. They had moved him to a regular room only to have him moved back to ICU a couple days later. The doctors had given us little hope. They took Charlie out of his medically-induced coma the week before, for two days. He had been intubated, so he couldn't speak. He was weak and out of it. Even though he had been unable to communicate, Bella and Renee would not leave his side for a second. We had gotten Charlie a board that he could write on. He had managed to write that he loved Bella and Renee but didn't have the strength to do more.

We had been instructed to not let him know the date, to not tell him the status of his health more than was necessary. The doctors felt it would put unnecessary stress on him to know that he had been in a coma since Thanksgiving. Even though he didn't know the details you could still see in Charlie's eyes that he knew... he knew something was terribly wrong. It proved that it didn't matter telling him the truth about the situation he was in. He couldn't handle the stress of just being awake and his body shut itself down. His blood pressure had been dropping at a deadly rate, so they put him back into a medically-induced coma and moved him back to the ICU.

The ICU waiting room had become a second home for Renee, Bella and me. Only one of us was allowed back at a time, usually, and we were not allowed to stay long. When I did go back to Charlie's room with Bella, I watched her. She would hold his hand and talk to him; letting him in on everything going on. She would talk about everyday things; what we had for lunch, what stupid thing Jasper had done - _you could write a book on that topic_ - what outfit Alice was forcing her to wear. Then, other times, she would crumble to the floor begging him to wake up and not leave her. Saying how she couldn't go on if he left her. Those times, my heart would clench and my stomach would become ill. I couldn't stand to see her like that. On those times, I would take her out of the room, holding her until she calmed.

Between the three of us, someone had been at the hospital at every second. Those had been long, boring days. We had planned to spend Christmas there as well, everyone wanting to be as close to Charlie as possible. It was six o'clock at night, Bella and I had been there since noon giving Renee a break. She would come to meet up there with us the next day for Christmas. My parents would be home the day after Christmas, and I wasn't sure what we would do after that. I had been in contact with Emmett, and even had gone home a couple of times to talk to my parents on the phone. Emmett said that he had told them I was sleeping or in the bathroom when they had called other times, when I was gone. I made sure to remind Emmett what I would do to him - if he did rat me out. _He better not fucking rat me out._

Bella was just walking through the ICU doors after visiting Charlie; she was crying again.

"Hey, how is he?" I asked that every time she came back.

"The same," she said, wiping her nose with her sleeve. She was entirely too thin, not wanting to eat because of the stress.

"What did you talk about?" Another routine question. Sometimes she would answer in detail, needing to talk. Other times she would just shrug, that let me know that her conversation with her dad was a private one.

"I told him how Jasper and Alice were going to come here for Christmas tomorrow, and that Rose may even come as well," she said.

"Oh good." I was glad she was letting some people back in, it was good for her to have friends to talk with besides me. I hoped that she would continue to grow her friendship with Rose.

I was starving and was hoping that she was too. "Well, should we get to our fancy Christmas Eve dinner in the cafeteria, my lady?" I asked, formally offering her my hand, trying to make her laugh. It worked, she took my hand and stood up.

"Do you know how stupid you just sounded?" she asked with a laugh.

"Why yes, I think I do," I said, giving her a wink, walking with her to the elevators.

When we made it down to the first floor where the cafeteria was, I was shocked to see that there were people in there. The sudden realization that many other families were stuck here on Christmas, saddened me. The mood in the room was somber, you could feel the pain radiating off of the people. Most sat with stale coffee in front of them. Any happiness Bella was feeling from my goofing around was now gone._ I may just have to step it up a notch and make a real ass of myself_, I thought. As long as it makes her smile.

"So, would you like the gourmet meat loaf or the French-inspired cheese burger on this fine night?"

"Edward, knock it off, seriously," she said, laughing.

"Fine, fine, what would you like?"

"I think I'll just have a salad, my stomach is sick," she said quietly. That had become an argument every night; her not wanting to eat. I understood that it was hard for her, but she had to eat. Some nights I would let it go, not wanting to upset her. Other nights, I would push her, making her eat, and that was one of those nights; she was going to eat.

"Sorry, not gonna fly. You need to eat. You had a salad last night."

"Edward, I am not going to have this fight with you," she said, walking away from me. I didn't want to upset her, so I let her go. I went to the other counter and ordered chicken strips and a burger; she would have some of it before we left this room.

She met me at the cashier with her bowl of lettuce, and I paid for our meals. Walking to a table, I could tell that she was upset that I bought her food anyway, but that was too bad. I felt bad that she was upset, and I understood that she lost her temper easily because of the stress. I wasn't going to watch her waste away, though. Not to mention that the lack of food made her more irritable. We sat in silence, staring our own meals; she was actively ignoring the food that I bought for her. We made quite a pair, sitting forlorn, staring at our food. As I looked around the room, I noticed sadly that we fit right in. We added to the hopeless feel of the room.

"Can you please just take five bites? That's all." I begged her quietly, reaching across the table, grabbing her hand and rubbing it with my thumb. She looked up at me. "For me?" It was a cheap shot, but I had to try. She reached for the chicken strips, brought one to her mouth and took a bite. We continued to eat in silence. The next time I looked up, she had tears in her eyes that were threatening to spill over.

"Bella, if it's that hard for you, don't eat. We can get you something later." I wanted her to eat, but not if it was going to make her cry.

"No, I am actually hungry now that I am eating," she admitted.

"What is it then, baby?" I asked.

"What do you usually do on Christmas Eve, Edward?" I had to think about it. We didn't have traditions.

"Bella, honestly, nothing special, and whatever we did do, it ended in tears and yelling."

"Didn't you have a big dinner or friends over, family? Anything?" I shook my head.

"When my grandma was still alive, she would come over, but still, the night always ended in tears and fighting."

"That's so sad, Edward," she said. "Next year, when Dad is all better, we're going to have the best Christmas ever. I promise," she decided. One of her tears escaping her eye, rolling down her cheek.

"That sounds perfect, sweetheart, I can't wait," I said wiping the tear away with my finger. She gave me a weak, shaky smile. I could tell she was trying not to cry.

"Usually we have Alice and her dad over. Also, any of the guys from the station that have nowhere to go. We have a huge dinner that Alice, Mom, and I spend all day making. Everyone always has the best time, people stop in all night; it's just a big party." As she kept talking her voice was getting shakier, and her lip was quivering. She stopped, took at deep breath, and continued on.

"Alice always stays the night, always… since we were little. We still wake up early and run downstairs for gifts... stupid really," she said laughing.

"No, it's not stupid at all." She had no idea how badly I wished I had memories like that.

"So what else did you guys do?" I wanted to keep her talking.

"Uh, we have this special breakfast that we make for every holiday, and just spend the day eating leftovers and relaxing. It's my favorite time of the year, and now... now... we are here." She started to breakdown.

"We're here, and there is no tree... no dinner... no friends and... my... my dad." At that point she officially broke down. I jumped out of my chair and rushed over to her, wrapping my arms around her frame.

"I'm so sorry," I repeated over and over as she sobbed into my chest. I looked around, thinking that everyone would be staring at us. I was surprised to see that no one even noticed, sadly it was common place there; a depressing, shitty place.

After Bella collected herself, she couldn't eat at all. We decided to just head back to the waiting room. I wished for nothing more than for Bella to have her big Christmas and her sleep over, it just wasn't possible, though.

We made our way back upstairs. It was only a little after seven o'clock, but no more visits to see Charlie would be allowed that night. We would just set our beds up on the chairs in the waiting room and hang out for the rest of the night.

When we got out of the elevator, we heard soft Christmas music coming from the waiting room. When we made it all the way into the room, there was a fake mini tree lit up. No one was in the room, but two sleeping bags were thrown on the floor. Bella and I looked at each other confused.

"Oh my God, they are not _that_ heavy, c'mon. Hurry, before they come back." We turned to find the owner of the voice and saw Alice and Jasper rounding the corner. Alice with a Santa hat on, carrying a couple small gifts, and Jasper behind her, dragging what looked like an extremely heavy bag of gifts.

"Great, they're already here," Alice said, annoyed to Jasper.

"What are you guys doing here?" Bella asked, saving Jasper from Alice's wrath.

"You really didn't think I'd let my best friend have Christmas Eve alone, in a shitty waiting room did you?" Alice asked with a big smile. She ran up to Bella, dropping the gifts she was carrying on a chair, wrapping her up in a big hug. Both of the girls had tears in their eyes when they stepped back from each other.

"Plus, I haven't woken up on Christmas morning without you, and I won't start now," she added.

"The tree, the gifts, Alice, it's all so sweet. Thank you so much," Bella said, hugging her friend again. Jasper walked over, dramatically dragging the bag behind him. I walked up to take it from him.

"Jesus, Jasper, really? This weighs like ten pounds," I said, laughing as I took the bag from him.

"Well shit, Edward, we can't all be dreamy beef cakes like you now, can we?" he said, pushing me. After we got all the presents under the tiny, table-top tree, Alice started pulling Tupperware out of one of the bags.

"So, I thought if we are all stuck in this shitty place, we might as well eat good food," Alice explained, as she passed around paper plates. She brought ham, potatoes, steamed veggies, and even dessert. Even though I ate downstairs, my mouth was watering at the food she brought.

"Man, this shit is _the tits_ Ali, good job!" Jasper exclaimed upon his first bite. Alice, Bella and I all started laughing, choking on our food.

"The tits?" I asked, still laughing. Jasper said the fucking oddest shit; it's always a good laugh though.

"You know like, 'this is the shit', but better," he said, giving me a look that said that I was an idiot for not saying it myself.

"Jasper, watch it, there's a little kid over there," Alice said, pointing behind Jasper. I turned and saw what looked like a mom and her son, who looked to be about four, sitting in one of the chairs. They must have come in while we were eating and we didn't notice. She was quietly reading a book to him, but his eyes were focused on us... and the food.

"Sorry, Miss, I'll watch my mouth!" Jasper all but shouted across the room. I couldn't help it, I almost spit my food out I was laughing so hard, and the girls were the same way. Fuck, we really needed that. It was all but impossible to be depressed around Jasper.

"I wonder if they had dinner…" Bella asked quietly.

"I dunno, let's invite them over, I brought a ton." Alice offered. She and Bella walked over and talked to the two, as Jasper and I shoveled food in our mouths. Jasper was right, it was _the tits_.

Not too long after, the girls came back with the mother and her son. We scooted over and made room for them in our circle, on the floor, with the food in the middle. Before Alice sat back down, she ran over to the wall and shut the florescence off, leaving us with the glow from the lights on the little tree that she brought in.

"Mommy, look!" the little boy exclaimed, excited by the lights.

"I know, aren't they pretty?" the mom said back to him, her eyes lighting up a little, seeing her son so happy.

"Welcome to cafe de' waiting room, I'm Jazz, what can I get for you?" Jasper asked the little boy, in a cheesy French accent, making him laugh. Jasper continued to joke around with the little boy all through dinner, and the more the little boy laughed the happier the mom looked.

We were all sufficiently stuffed by the time the food was gone. Throughout dinner, we learned that the woman's husband was in a bad car accident the night before. It didn't sound good. She fought to keep the tears out of her eyes. Her family was going to be with her shortly. She kept thanking us over and over for including her and her son in our dinner.

We were all in a food coma after the meal and were ready to sleep. Jasper and Alice in their sleeping bags, and Bella and I were on our self-made beds out of waiting room chairs. It was one fucked up sleep over. Right before I passed out, I heard Jasper's voice.

"Goodnight, Alice, Goodnight, Bella, Goodnight, Edward, Goodnight, John boy, Goodnight, little Suzy, good-"

"Shut it Jasper!" Alice hissed, effectively cutting off his Walton's impression, followed by all of us laughing. A little while earlier, the woman's family had made it into town and forced her to go with them to their hotel, so we had the waiting room to ourselves.

The next morning we were awoken early by Renee returning to the hospital, shocked to see our makeshift campout. Bella, Alice, and Renee took their turns to visit Charlie, then we sat around and opened the gifts that Alice brought. Renee even managed to get something for myself and Bella as well. I wanted to go shopping for Bella so badly, but she begged me not to, saying she didn't want to celebrate until Charlie could celebrate with us. I reluctantly respected her request.

"I'm really sorry, I didn't go shopping for anyone," Bella said, tears in her eyes.

"Bella, no one expected you to."

"Bella, it's ok," Alice and I were quick to correct her. Renee made her feelings known, as well.

"Bella, it's ok to let people do something nice for you, that's what friends, no, family," she corrected herself. "Is for," Renee said with tears in her eyes. I felt terrible, she was alone in this, and her partner was in the bed down the hall. It must have been so hard on her.

A while later, Rose and Jasper's mom came by, bringing some more snacks and desserts. Rose hung out with us for a while, and Renee spent the time talking with Jasper's mom. It seemed that Renee enjoyed having someone to talk with. Soon everyone left to get to their own Christmas dinners. Renee wanted to stay the night with Charlie, and insisted that we go home. It was hard for Bella to leave, but eventually she did, after one more visit with her dad.

We made it to Bella's house, and for the first time since we started, we didn't have sex when we had the opportunity because we were alone. I just held Bella; feeling hopeless, as she cried herself to sleep. I whispered how sorry I was. That was the worst Christmas ever.

February 8

It was raining again, and I was walking to meet Bella to go to school. Bella must have been running late, because she should have been there ten minutes ago. I awoke having a terrible feeling in my gut that morning that I couldn't explain. Her running late made me worry.

Since Christmas, things had been_ ok_. My parents had been home for a little more than a month. The fighting had stopped, for the most part, but we weren't talking at all either. Dad had assumed that I was still training after school every day, but I wasn't, I had been going to the hospital with Bella everyday, then going home. Since they had no idea that I spent Christmas week at Bella's, they had no reason to not believe I wasn't where I said I was. Dad had still tried to call the coach a couple of times, but the coach never responded, finally having enough of my dad's shit.

Bella had spent New Years in the hospital, like she did at Christmas. I hadn't been able get out of the house to see her, but I knew that Alice, Angela and Rose were going to spend the day with her. They had talked her into going out to lunch. She had called me at one point, saying what a nice time she was having. The next call I had received from her, she was crying. The woman and her son that we met on Christmas had grown somewhat close to Bella and Renee. Apparently her husband had died while Bella was out to lunch; she was pretty upset by the news. She had also been worried for the woman and her son.

Bella made it to school most days, but her absences were becoming more frequent the longer Charlie was in the hospital. Charlie was still in a medical coma, his lungs not improving. They had been having a hard time controlling his blood pressure as of late.

I assumed that Bella was not coming to school that day, because it was so late. I decided to just keep walking. I was about to call her to check on her, because I just couldn't shake that terrible feeling I had.

I was pretty soaked and pulling my phone out when I saw the blue truck rounding the bend. Bella pulled to the side of the road and I jumped in.

"I'm sorry I'm so late," she said, giving me a kiss.

"It's ok, is everything alright?" I asked.

"Yes," she said with a big smile. "I swear, Edward, I stopped by the hospital this morning, and I swear Charlie squeezed my hand. He squeezed it!" she said with a giant smile.

"Baby, that's great," I said back to her. She had done this a couple times before, the doctors explained that his muscles may twitch, but that he wouldn't wake up, but Bella didn't want to hear that. She wanted him to wake up and be ok more than anything in this world. It made her so happy, so I went along with it, feeling guilty that I was giving her false hope.

We made it to school and parted ways going to our respective classes. I couldn't focus through my first period, my stomach almost sick from the knot in it. I walked with Bella to our second class that we had together. We were waiting for class to start. I was playing games on her phone when it started to buzz; I showed her the number that was flashing on the screen.

"I don't know that number, answer it," she said with a shrug.

"Hello."

"Hello, is this the number to reach," she paused. "Isabella Swan?"

"Yes, one sec," I said handing the phone to Bella.

"Hello," Bella said into the phone. I started to doodle on my paper, the teacher walked in. I looked up from my doodle to warn Bella so that her phone didn't get taken away. What I saw in her eyes when she looked at me made me sick, I could tell my bad feeling that I had all morning was for a reason. Bella shut her phone without saying goodbye.

"No! My dad," she said as she stood up and fled the classroom.

Shit.

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	20. Chapter 20 Goodnight, Travel Well

**This chapter has not only a serious tissue warning, but also a warning that the contents may be disturbing and triggering for some readers. Please continue with caution.**

**Mamma4ever, thank you so much for all your hard work on this story**

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_is this temporary flesh and bone_

_we know that it's over now_

_I feel my faded mind begin to roam_

_up above the world so high_

_and everything you loved_

_and every time you try_

_everybody's watching_

_everybody cried_

_**stay, don't leave me**_

_the stars can't for your sign_

_don't signal now_

_and there's nothing I can say_

_there's nothing I can do now_

_there's nothing I can say_

_there's nothing we can do now_

_**Goodnight, travel well**_

Goodnight, Travel Well by the Killers

EPOV

February 8

We drove to the hospital as fast as we could. Bella looked sick, her face was pale and she was breathing heavily. I flew into the first space that I saw, and we ran in. We ran to the elevators and rode them up to the tenth floor, the ICU. When we rounded the corner and saw a distraught Renee, Bella's legs almost gave out and I reached out to catch her. She brushed me off and ran towards her mom.

I stayed back, not only giving them their time, but also avoiding the inevitable bad news. They started hugging and both were crying hard. A nurse that had gotten to know us since Charlie had been in the ICU, stepped up to me. I pulled my attention away from Bella and her mom and faced the nurse.

"Is there anyone else that I should call for them?" she asked. Call for what? I had no idea what was going on.

"What's going on?" I asked.

"Oh, hun, I'm sorry, but he's not going to make it," she said, giving my arm a gentle squeeze. I felt instantly sick. I looked over at Bella to see if she already knew, and my fears were confirmed. She was leaned up against the wall and was slowly sliding down, tears silently streaming down her face. I left the nurse and ran to her. She wouldn't even focus on me, her eyes looked so distant. I slid to the floor with her and wrapped my arms tight around her, and the most heart-wrenching sobs I had ever heard in my life emitted from her.

"No, no, no, no," she was repeating over and over. I could say nothing. What do you say to someone that just found out their dad was going to die? I just held her. I had no idea for how long. I wasn't sure where Renee went, but she wasn't around us. The same nurse had come up to us and offered us a private room where we could be alone.

When I finally got Bella to agree to go to the private waiting room, she wouldn't let me touch her. She stood, and with a force I had never seen before, she walked away from me, punching the door as she opened it. I scrambled behind her, having had no idea what she needed from me; I had no idea what to do.

When we made it to the room, Renee was already in there. There were two officers with her, one I recognized as Dan, the man that helped me that night with my parents. They were comforting her and both had a very somber look. When Renee saw Bella, she stood to hug her but Bella just shrugged her off and went and sat by the window in the back. Her tears had stopped, she just looked so... angry. I didn't blame her. I couldn't imagine how she felt. I quietly walked over and sat three chairs down from her, giving her the space that she seemed to need at that point.

Dan walked over a little while later, and sat down next to me.

"How's she taking it?" he asked. I just shrugged.

"I have no idea, she won't let anyone talk to her," I said, feeling anxiety over watching her suffer, not able to do anything to help her.

"Hang in there, son. Is there anyone I should call?" I knew that Charlie's parents had both passed; besides Bella and Renee, the force was his family. Apparently Bella could hear us, because for the first time since we walked into that room, she turned and spoke.

"I want Alice." That's all she said, then turned back to face the window. Feeling helpless to help her in any other way, I jumped up and called her best friend. I didn't want to tell Alice over the phone, knowing that she was very close to Charlie as well, so I also called Jasper, telling him. I figured that he could let her know before they came, and maybe Alice would be able to help Bella once she arrived. Before Alice arrived, Doctor Burke came in and sat down.

When Bella saw him, she finally left her perch by the window, and came and sat with the rest of us, still not speaking to anyone, and not letting anyone touch her. He explained that Charlie's body had just given up. That he fought so hard, but just could fight no more. His lungs had been completely taken over and because of all the other treatment he went through, his body was just too weak. He explained that his organs had already begun to shut down, and the only thing that was keeping him alive was the medication that controlled his blood pressure that was trying so hard to drop. He said, even with the medication, that his body would still shut down by nightfall. The medication was keeping him alive, so Bella and Renee could say their... _goodbyes._ When he finished his whole explanation, he apologized and gave his condolences. Bella shocked us all by speaking for the first time since we came back here.

"I'm sorry, but that's bullshit! I want to see him; _now." _We were all taken back by her forcefulness, but the doctor didn't seem surprised. When I stood to stop her from her aggressive approach to the doctor, he lifted his hand to stop me.

"It is very understandable that you want to see him, I want you all to spend as much time as you can with him. I have spoken to the ICU doctor and the visitation restrictions have been lifted for obvious reasons. You all are welcome to spend as much time as you would like in his room." After that, he excused himself.

Renee quickly stood, and I'm sure headed to Charlie's room. Bella just stood in the middle of the room, staring at the spot that the doctor was standing in moments before. The officer's excused themselves. and it was just Bella and I left in the room. I made no movements and no attempt to talk to her; I just sat and let her work out whatever it was that she needed to. I sat and watched her stare blankly at the door. When her whole body started to shake, I couldn't take it anymore, and walked up behind her, wrapping my arms around her. Her legs instantly gave out and she fell limp into my arms.

"I can't, I can't... I can't go in there... can't say goodbye.. how.. how.." She was gasping, trying to get the words out. She couldn't breathe.

"Shhh," I said into her hair, rocking her back and forth. "You don't have to go anywhere until you're ready," I promised. She sounded like she was hyperventilating with her sobs. I had never heard pain like that from another human being.

"Never, I'll never be ready," she sobbed. Not too long after, she stood up and went to the bathroom, washing the tears off her face. When she came back out, she informed me that she wanted to go see her dad. I offered to go with her, and she accepted.

Going through those ICU doors felt like a death march. I could feel time slowing down; everything that felt important only hours ago, meant nothing. When we reached the outside of his door, Bella took a deep breath and walked in, I followed behind her. Renee was sitting in a chair next to her husband, tears flowing freely down her cheeks. Bella walked over, sitting on the edge of her dad's bed. In one hand she held Renee's, in the other she held on to Charlie's arm. I stayed back, giving them their time. Never in my life had I felt the sadness that I was feeling at that moment. I couldn't imagine how they were feeling.

I looked at Charlie lying in the hospital bed. He was so frail; he had lost all muscle mass from being in a coma since Thanksgiving. He still had no hair and his skin coloring was all wrong. It was obvious what the doctor said, his organs were shutting down. Bella asked for a glass of water, so I left her and Renee to go get them both something to drink.

When I made it back out to the main waiting room, it was filled with men in blue uniforms. The whole police department seemed to be in the room. As I scanned the room, I found Alice, Jasper, and Alice's dad sitting in the corner. I walked over to them, and all three stood.

"Oh, Edward, is she ok?" Alice asked, immediately hugging me.

"No, I really don't think she is." I said. Jasper gave me an awkward hug, asking me to let him know if there was anything he could do. Quite a few officers were coming up to me asking for information on their friend. I was quickly feeling overwhelmed, the situation becoming so real. We were going to leave that night, without Charlie and never come back. I walked away from the group, and grabbed two water bottles, heading back to Renee and Bella. They were in the same spots as when I left.

I overheard Renee telling Bella that she thought that they should give a chance to let Charlie's closest friends and Alice to say goodbye. She agreed, and they gave me a list of names of who would be allowed to say goodbye. I decided to give that list to the nurse; I didn't think I could handle going back out there again. Alice was the first to come in. Her eyes bright red, any natural bubbly-ness she possessed was nowhere to be found. She and Bella held each other as they cried. We gave Alice a few minutes alone to say her goodbyes. Bella just stood outside the room; she looked to be in shock. I had no idea what to say to her, I wasn't going to ask her if she was ok; because I knew she was far from it.

When Alice came out of the room, she looked sick. Her skin ashen and clammy; I walked her to the first water fountain so she could get some water. After taking a sip, she sat in a chair next to the fountain. I sat with her, wanting to give Bella and Renee as much privacy as they wanted.

"I've never said goodbye to someone before," Alice whispered next to me.

"I'm sorry, Alice," I said, and I meant it. I knew that Alice was very close to Charlie, that he was a second dad to her - the dad that cared.

"This is going to kill her, Edward. They were so close." I nodded. I already knew this. I knew that Bella would never be the same again. None of us would.

After Alice's goodbye, three of Charlie's best friends all came and gave theirs as well. Every one of them had tears in their eyes when they came out. An officer on the way out, let me know that most of them were staying in the waiting room and willing to do whatever Bella and Renee needed them to.

Someone from the bereavement department of the hospital came in and talked Renee through what would happen after Charlie's passing. This information was making it all too real for Renee causing her to breakdown. She was very close to a couple of the officer's wives and they called them in as support for her. Dale, Alice's dad, also stepped up immediately, acting as lawyer on behalf of Renee.

As the hours passed, and all the goodbyes except for Renee's and Bella's had been said, I realized it was just a matter of hours that Charlie would no longer exist on this earth. Charlie started to bleed from his mouth, a sign the doctor said that there wasn't much time left. Instead of letting his organs completely shut down, Renee decided to pull the plug on his blood pressure medication, allowing him to slip away more peacefully. They were getting ready to do this right then.

Jake and Charlotte had just been by to let Renee and Bella know how sorry they were when they heard the news, and to let them know they would help in any way they could.

When Jake walked by me on the way out, he shook my hand and said, "Hang in there, man, I'm really sorry this happened to such a great family."

I just nodded, finding it harder and harder to speak. The doctor came by right after, to let us know that the time had come. Bella kept asking him over and over if he was sure - sure that there was nothing else they could do. She was pleading with the doctor to come up with something. My heart constricted with her last desperate attempts to save her dad. Renee cried softly beside her, already knowing that there was nothing more to do.

They had the option to stay in the room as Charlie passed. I was glad when Bella declined; I knew she would never be able to handle that and her dad would not have wanted her to witness that. Renee wanted to stay and have the last minutes with her husband, and we all felt that was appropriate. People offered to stay and support her, but it was something she felt was private and needed to do on her own.

The time had come, Renee just stepped out to give Bella privacy to say goodbye to her father for the last time. I went to step out, when Bella stopped me, asking me to stay with her.

"Edward, I can't...I just can't. What do I say?" she pleaded, as tears streamed down her cheek.

"There is no right or wrong thing to say, Bella, just say whatever you feel." I had no idea what I would say in her position. She turned back to her dad and she gave the most beautiful goodbye I would ever hear. She thanked him for everything, from being the best dad to her, to thanking him for specific days, special memories between the two of them. She made promises to him for the future, things she would and wouldn't do.

By the end of her final goodbye, she was breaking down, clinging to his hand, begging him not to leave her; she was promising to do anything if he would just stay. Hearing her desperate cries broke me, and for the first time since I was eight, I felt a tear slide out of my eye and down my cheek. I quickly wiped it away, wanting to be strong for Bella. She turned to me, her whole face pale with red splotches.

"I can't leave, this can't be real," she said, shaking her head. I walked behind her, placing my hands on her shoulders, wishing I could physically transfer my strength to her.

"I'm so sorry, baby," I said, softly kissing the top of her head. She just sat there, shaking her head. I would never rush her, but the blood coming from his lips was increasing, letting us know that there was really no more time. I took that moment to say a silent goodbye of my own, promising the man in front of me that I would not have the honor of getting to know better, that I would do anything and everything in my power to keep his daughter safe and happy. That I would make sure that she was taken care of and didn't want for anything. I thanked him for the kindness he showed me that my father never did. I said one more silent goodbye, and felt another tear slide down my face, already feeling the pain from losing him.

I could tell that Bella could see her time had come to an end, as she gently wiped his mouth with a cloth. She laid her head on his shoulder, and she was whispering something into his ear. I stepped by the door of his room, giving her privacy that I felt she needed. I could hear her telling him how sorry that she was and how much she loved him. She said one final goodbye, and kissed his cheek. As soon as she made it outside the door of his room, she collapsed into a pile and was sobbing. I stayed back and let Renee comfort her child, knowing that this is something they would be doing for each other for a long while into the future.

When Renee went into Charlie's room for the last time, I helped Bella to the private room that we were in before. Before she could make it to the room, she stopped and violently spilled the contents of her stomach into a trash can. When we made it to the room, she was in shock, sitting on the couch next to me, rocking back and forth one minute, sobbing into my shirt the next. We didn't speak as we sat there; there was nothing to be said. When I saw Doctor Burke come in the room with a somber look on his face, I knew that was it. Bella's head shot up. She stood, tears leaking from her eyes.

"I'm sorry, he's gone," Dr. Burke said softly, and then quietly walked out of the room. I tightened my grip on Bella as horrific sobs took over her body. I felt like the whole world had disappeared around us. Her body was shaking so hard, we both slid to the ground. Her pain was mine, and that was the worst moment in my entire life.

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**When the one you love becomes a memory... That memory becomes everything**

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**I'm sorry to those of you that had hope that Charlie would pull through... This is how the story has been planned from the beginning, and this chapter was very, very hard for me to write.**

**Please take a moment let me know what you think**


	21. Chapter 21 Pain

**Thanks to everyone for their sweet reviews. I wasn't sure what to expect from last chapter and I thank you all for your sweet words.**

**A small tissue warning for this chapter**

**Big, huge thanks to Whatobsession17 for pre reading and Mamma4ever for catching all my bad grammar ;) **

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_I saw you cry today _

_The pain may fill you _

_I saw you shy away _

_The pain will not kill you_

_You made me smile today _

_You spoke with many voices _

_We travelled miles today _

_Shared expressions voiceless _

_It has to end _

_Living in your head _

_Without anything to numb you _

_Living on the edge _

_Without anything to numb you _

_Numb by Sia_

BPOV

The pain... the pain was everywhere, it was all consuming. It was a raging fire that had taken over my whole being. Its hot flames licked every part of my body sparing nothing, leaving nothing the way it had been before. The pain was an acid that tore through my veins making me feel like I was being burned alive. I never knew that it was possible to feel that level of torture. It made it hard to breathe; it made it hard to function on any level.

Coming home from the hospital the night my dad died was horrible. I can't explain the feelings that surged through my body. I don't remember leaving the hospital, I don't remember the ride home, and I don't remember being taken inside the house. I do remember my mom going straight upstairs to their bedroom, and I could hear her sobbing. Jasper, Alice and Edward all stayed the night, but gave us our space.

As soon as I knew the three were not going to come up and check on me anymore, I made my way to my mom. Once in the hallway I could hear Alice's soft cries coming from the bathroom. I bypassed the bathroom and went into my parents' room, where my mom was. We lay in their bed and cried. Neither of us ever speaking, just mourning our loss. At some point, I felt her softly running her fingers through my hair, telling me how much she loved me and promising that everything would be ok. I wasn't so sure I believed that. I didn't think I would ever heal from the loss.

February 14

It had been a week since my dad died; the funeral was the next day. It had been a week since my life had been torn down so easily, crashing like a house of cards. I had done just about nothing but lay in bed, help plan a funeral, and lay in bed some more… and cry. Plenty of crying. The days blurred into nights, I never knew if it would be light or dark when I opened my eyes. I had not been back to school and had no desire to ever do so. Alice and Edward had been bringing me assignments, and I had thrown every single one into the trash.

Someone had stayed every night, but don't ask me who. I had been so out of it, nothing having the same meaning that it did before. After the first night, I had given my mom the space that I felt she needed but would never ask for. I could hear her though. I would take my pillow and lie outside her door listening to her cry, and cry with her; sleep never reaching me. Edward had found me lying in the hallway a couple of times, the expression on his face heartbreaking.

Edward would come over and try to get me to eat, to make me shower. I knew all of this had been killing him, but I couldn't find the strength to put on a front for him; I was miserable. He would let me sit with him and just cry. He would hold me and give me the smallest relief from the pain. I hardly talked, nothing felt important to me anymore. He was the only one that I would respond to at all, though. Him and maybe Alice sometimes. He hadn't pushed hard, but had tried to get me to open up a little; I knew my silence scared him.

I had tried to help with the funeral as much as I could, not wanting it to be all on my mom's shoulders. Dale had been a huge help taking care of every legal aspect. I was pretty shocked that he had seemed to drop everything to help our family. My dad's friends from the station and their wives would do whatever they could as well. A large crowd was expected for the funeral. We were having the funeral outside of town in a church that could accommodate the crowd we expected. Charlie was well loved in the community. Many local businesses were offering their services for the funeral. The police station was collecting money for our family to cover the costs of everything that wasn't already being covered. It looked like Renee was going to have to pay very little, if anything at all.

Whenever I thought about the funeral, I would instantly get sick, and usually lose whatever food I had managed to keep down that day. I couldn't imagine going, I had already said goodbye, and now I was going to have to do it publicly. The thought of everyone seeing me so raw... at my worst hour… about killed me.

I had nothing to wear to a funeral and had broken down after realizing it the day before. Edward sat with me going through my closet but there was nothing that was appropriate to wear to my father's funeral. What the fuck do you wear to your father's funeral? Nothing seemed right.

I had been up all day trying to get everything ready for the ceremony the next day. I actually made an effort that day, showered and cleaned my room. For the first time in a week, I put on jeans instead of the dirty sweat pants I had been wearing. What little activity I did exhausted me, and I sat by the window just staring outside. Even though it was irrational, I was offended by other people moving on with their lives. I watched as people went to check their mail or picked kids up at the bus stop. All I could think was _"How are you going on? Don't you know that my world has ended?"_ Like I said, I knew it was irrational, but it was exactly how I felt. I felt myself grow angry at every innocent bystander that crossed my path. People had learned quickly not to ask how I was doing, they really didn't need to; it was obvious that I was a mess.

I grew tired of watching the world go on without me and crawled back into bed, clutching a shirt that I had stolen from my dad's dresser; it still smelled like him. I gripped it as hard as I could and let it soak up the tears that I felt would never stop.

EPOV

Hell. If I had to describe that week in one word that would be it. There had been nothing but pain; the feeling of loss so strong. Alice and I had lost the only man that showed interest in our lives that far surpassed any interest our own fathers had showed. Jasper felt as if he had lost a friend. The Forks Police Department had lost their chief and a good friend. Renee had lost her husband, her high-school sweetheart. And Bella, well Bella had lost her father. She was completely devastated as was Renee.

Renee had had a mask on around me and others for the most part. She knew business had needed to be done and that a funeral needed to be planned. I was so impressed at her resilience. I knew she had broken down, though, I had heard her in her room when it all became too much.

Bella had no mask, her pain had been an open wound. I had never seen someone so broken. Some days she would let me hold her while she cried or let me rub her back to help her sleep. Other times she would be completely cut off to the world. I had shown up at her house after school a couple of times only to find her curled up in a ball outside her parents' bedroom door, crying. Nothing in the world could hurt me like seeing her in pain. My parents had tried, though.

They had been shitheads about everything. A little slack had been cut so I could go over and help, but the previous night my mom had sat me down to let me know that after the funeral all the restrictions would be going back to normal. I had let her know that it would be a cold day in hell before she would keep me from Bella again. She had also insisted on being at the funeral. I honestly think my mom's heart was in the right place wanting to go and show her sympathy - she didn't get that everyone basically hated her. Her being there would be like pouring salt on their wounds. I didn't focus on it though, Bella was much more important than whatever shit my mother was trying to pull.

Emmett seemed to feel genuinely bad about it. Bella and he _were_ good friends at one point. He gave me a letter asking me to give it to her, knowing I wouldn't let him get within a city block of her. It was a shitty thing to do, but I read it, refusing to give it to her if he had said something nasty. It just had a picture of them at some school event sometime the year before and on the back of it he had just written: _I'm so sorry... for everything. _I never gave it to her. I just put it in a pile with all the rest of the cards from everyone else, deciding he was no more important than everyone else that had sent her a card. I wasn't hiding it from her; I just knew she had no emotional energy to deal with him on top of everything else.

Bella could be quiet for hours at a time, not speaking once, then out of the middle of nowhere she would break down or lash out in anger. Like the day before when she had had a complete breakdown over having nothing to wear to Charlie's funeral. I had never seen her so upset about clothing, but I guess I knew that it really had nothing to do with the clothing itself.

That's how I ended up in the fucking women's department at the mall. Staring at rack after rack of girly shit I knew nothing about. I was trying to find something for Bella to wear, to take one stress off her. I almost asked Alice to do it, but knew that she was dealing with grief of her own.

I had been in the damn store for over an hour at that point and decided to just buy what I was holding and hoped she would like it enough to wear it. It was just a modest black dress with long sleeves that had a wrap that tied around the waist, I figured it would land right at her knees. It was made of a soft material and I hoped that it would be comfortable for her. I had no idea what was appropriate for a woman to wear to a funeral and hoped that dress would be ok.

I looked at my watch and saw that it was after six o'clock. I needed to get to Bella's. I wanted to make sure she liked the dress in time for me to be able to take it back and get something different if she hated it. Another dilemma I was dealing with was that it was Valentine's Day. I didn't think there was a shittier Valentine's Day in history. I knew that Bella wouldn't want to celebrate, I wasn't even sure if she was aware of the date. I didn't want her to think that I had forgotten about her though, so I picked up flowers and a card on the way to her house.

When I walked into the house it was quiet. If I didn't know better I would have thought no one was home. I made my way up the stairs to Bella's closed bedroom door. I opened it and quietly walked in. Bella was asleep in her bed, just like I had found her so many times in the middle of the day, but I was so happy to see that she was wearing jeans and seemed to have cleaned her room a little. It was more than she had done all week. I sat in a chair she must have moved over by her window and watched her sleep. She didn't even seem to find peace in her sleep. Her hands were in tight fists, her jaw clenched and her eyebrows knitted together. I coudn't stand watching her go through all that pain, and the funeral the next day was going to be horrible.

When the sun set, I walked over and sat on the edge of her bed. I gently ran a hand through her hair and rubbed her hands in hopes that she would loosen her fists. She started to stir and opened her eyes.

"Hey," I said softly.

"Hi," she said, her voice coming out hoarse. She sat up, leaning against her headboard, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.

"How you feelin'?" I asked. She just shrugged in response. Not too long after that, she curled up with her head in my lap, and I ran my hands through her soft hair. We sat in silence until her voice broke through.

"I can't do it Edward."

"What, baby?" I asked.

"Tomorrow, I can't. I'm... not going," she said, her voice breaking. I took a deep breath while I thought about what would be the best thing to say to her.

"Bella, no one is going to make you go. I _do_ think, though... one day, maybe not soon, but one day you will regret it if you dont." It was the only thing that came to mind. I didn't want to tell her that it would be good for her, or that it would give her closure. I was pretty sure it was going to break her, but I did know that she would feel guilty and regret not going.

"I know... I know that I would regret it, but I can't go. I don't think I'll make it through," she said, sniffling.

"Babe, what do you think you need to do? No one is expecting anything. You're going for your dad and no one else. You don't have to make it through, if it's too much, one word and I'll get you out of there, I promise." I would get her out of there if that's what she needed, but I had a feeling that once she was there she would see it through.

"Promise?" she asked quietly.

"Promise what?" I asked.

"That you'll leave with me if I can't make it through."

"I promise," I said, kissing the top of her head. She sat up and stretched, pulling her hair into a pony tail. I wasn't sure how she would react to my buying her an outfit, but I figured right then was as good as time as any to give it to her.

"Bella, I know that you were stressed out about what you were going to... uh wear tomorrow. I saw this and thought... well, here." I just handed her the box the dress was in, not really knowing how to explain what my train of thought was. She opened it, and I saw a tear roll down her cheek; I mentaly kicked myself for giving it to her.

"Thank you, Edward," she said to the dress box, not looking up at me. I didn't say anything back, just sat waiting to see if she needed a minute. She shocked me by standing up and stripping her clothing off. I felt my pants getting tight seeing her in nothing but her panties, apparently she hadn't put a bra on that day. I thought of baseball, Jasper in a Speedo, anything to get the problem in my pants to go away. That was _not_ the appropriate time for my body's reaction. She slipped the dress over her beautiful curves and tied it at the waist. Even though the occasion for the dress was a horrific one, she still looked beautiful wearing it.

"Thank you, Edward." She turned from the mirror to face me. "Really," she added with a soft smile. She walked forward and gave me a big hug, I could feel her tears wetting the shoulder of my shirt. She must have caught a glimpse of the gerbera daisies I had bought her as she looked over my shoulder, because I heard her gasp softly.

"What are those?" she asked.

"I knew you wouldn't want to celebrate, but I didn't want you to think that I forgot about Valentine's Day," I said, hoping she wouldn't be mad at me for acknowledging something so trivial as Valentine's Day during the worst time of her life. She stood and walked toward the flowers, smelling them and reading what I had written on the card. She seemed ok, and then I suddenly heard her gasping for air; sobs ripping through her. I rushed over and wrapped my arms around her, apologizing for the flowers.

"No, no... Edward... it's not you. Thank you so much for the flowers." After calming down and getting her breathing back to normal, she explained to me that Charlie would always get her flowers on Valentine's Day, he had even sent them to school before. She explained that she didn't even realize that it was Valentine's Day and it just made her realize that she would never again get another flower from her dad. My heart broke, but I vowed to myself that she would never have a Valentine's Day without flowers, ever. Even though her dad wouldn't be there anymore, I would do everything I could to make sure she still got everything she was used to and more.

I was so glad that she had opened up to me and talked to me about why the flowers had upset her. She had been so quiet lately, it was so nice to hear her voice again.

Renee, Bella, Alice and I had dinner together then we all decided to get to bed. I wasn't sure what any of us were going to face the next day.

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	22. Chapter 22 Aftermath

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**Thank you to Mamma4ever for her awesome beta work and Whatobession17 for pre reading!**

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Take this sinking boat and point it home

We've still got time

Raise your hopeful voice you have a choice

You'll make it now

Falling slowly, eyes that know me

And I can't go back

Moods that take me and erase me

And I'm painted black

You have suffered enough

And warred with yourself

It's time that you won

Falling Slowly by Glen Hansard

February 15

EPOV

I woke up from a loud noise. I had started on the couch the night before, but ended up in bed with Bella after she had asked me to sleep with her because she couldn't sleep. I woke up alone in the empty bed. I got out of the warm haven and wandered downstairs. There were so many people in the house doing whatever they had to do to get ready for a funeral. I ignored everyone that was around and tried to find Bella. She was in the bathroom getting dressed. I walked in, shutting the door behind me.

"Hey," she said softly. She was just finishing tying the wrap on her dress. She wasn't crying right then, but her eyes were rimmed in red as was her nose.

"Why are you in here, sweetheart?" I asked, hugging her from behind. I looked at her through the reflection in the mirror.

"I didn't want to wake you up. I know I've kept you from sleep lately," she said softly, tears starting to gather in her eyes.

"No, you should've woken me, Bella," I said as I spun her toward me. I sat on the edge of the tub, she stood between my legs. She ran her hands through my hair and I leaned into her touch. Understandably, it had been a while since I had felt her affectionate touch, and I hadn't realized how much I missed it. I ran my hands up and down the back of her soft legs. Even though I loved the moment we were having, I knew we couldn't hide in the bathroom all day.

"I should shower," I said. She just nodded and turned back to the mirror. With one last kiss to her shoulder, I stripped down and climbed into the shower. When I got out, Bella was sitting on top of the toilet lid, crying softly into a tissue. Quickly, I wrapped a towel around my waist and pulled her into my arms. We were in for a long day.

Bella, Renee, and I found ourselves in an unmarked car heading toward the church where the service was being held. Renee was quiet the whole ride - in a daze - her head rested against the window as she stared out. Bella's head was in my lap, she couldn't stop the tears. It amazed me how different mother and daughter were.

Cop cars were in front of and behind us. Almost every officer from Forks and the surrounding towns was going to be at the service. When we arrived, we were shocked to see the room was full of flowers and people. Almost every large station from around the country had sent a wreath or an arrangement of some kind. The venue was exploding with bodies. The top balcony was full, every seat taken and people stood as well.

Renee, Bella, myself and a few officers made our way to the front, walking down the center while everyone watched. On the way down, I saw my mom and Emmett sitting in the middle rows; I made no effort to acknowledge them. Alice, Jasper, their families and the Forks officers sat directly behind the family. Renee and Bella took their time hugging and acknowledging each person. I was proud of them, they were so strong.

We sat and the service started. It was sad and beautiful all at once. Bella held it together through the eulogy and kind words from Charlie's friends. When a slide show started, highlighting the family's most precious memories, Bella lost it. Picture after picture flashed across the screen.

Bella at the hospital right after she was born, her dad holding her.

Bella's first birthday. In the picture, she sat on her father's lap as she shoved her face into a whole cake. Charlie wore a look of pure joy, beaming at the little girl on his lap.

The next was one of the whole family. It looked like it was Easter, and Bella was in a cute pink dress holding a basket of eggs. She was about the age of three; her Mom and Dad stood behind her.

The next was Charlie teaching Bella to ride a bike. She wore a look of concentration, while Charlie wore one of pride.

Then, the family Christmas pictures. At that point, Renee started to break down as well. The woman next to her put her arm around her and handed her more tissues. The pictures continued and there wasn't a dry eye in the entire place.

Bella's first days of school.

Pictures of Charlie in uniform.

Charlie dressed funny for Halloween.

Renee and Charlie dressed up for special events.

Pictures of family events, Alice included.

Pictures of Charlie in the hospital on the day of the transplant. The ones with Jasper and me with our heads shaved; Alice and Bella laughing next to us. Charlie holding up the gag gifts we bought him.

The final picture that stayed up on the screen was the last family portrait that had been taken; the three had smiles on their faces. I could only imagine what Bella was thinking; that when that picture was taken they were all so ignorant that it would be the last one.

The service ended with Renee bravely standing on the stage as so many sets of eyes watched her. With a shaky voice she started her speech, no paper in hand.

"We... we." She couldn't get started because tears poured out of her eyes; this made Bella cry harder. Renee took a step back from the podium, she breathed deep and wiped her eyes. When she came back to the podium she wore a sad smile.

"Excuse me..." She cleared her throat. "We would like to thank everyone that has showed my daughter and me so much love and support. It's obvious how much Bella and I loved... no _love_ Charlie and that he is loved by this town and beyond." She took a moment and wiped her eyes with the tissue she held in her hand. "The years that I was lucky enough to be married to Charlie were the best of my life. The day Bella was born was the best day of our lives and he was an amazing father." Her voice quivered and she was having a hard time keeping it together.

The woman that had been sitting with her stood next to her, holding her hand for support. "Again, thank you so much. And Charlie... wherever you are, I love you and we'll never forget," she finished, her voice breaking, blending into sobs. When she came off the stage, Bella stood and embraced her mother. Watching them in so much pain was almost more than I could take. Everything in me was designed to keep her from hurting, but there was nothing I could do to fix that pain.

February 18

It had been three days since the funeral. Bella still hadn't been back to school, she couldn't miss more and not fall too far behind; graduation was coming soon. She promised that she would try to go back the following Monday. Since the funeral, I had gone the rounds with my parents.

They thought that now that the funeral was over, we should all move on. They didn't get it. There was no moving on, and especially not three days after the funeral. I just blew them off. I knew it was only a matter of time before they figured out that I wasn't playing football and I was ready for the war that would follow. It was almost the end of February, though, and I planned on moving out in May, so I only had a few more months to wait.

"Nancy!" I turned to see Jasper following me into the parking lot.

"What's up Jazz?" I asked.

"Eh, not much. How's B. Swan?" God, Jazz and his nicknames. Even at the funeral, he referred to Charlie only as Chuck.

"You know…" I shrugged, not wanting to go into detail. "She's ok." I didn't know what to say. One moment she would be fine, the next she would be angry or in tears. I understood, but it was all wearing on me. When I was with her, I wanted to fix her. When I wasn't with her, I worried about her. Then the constant fighting at home didn't help my sanity or stress level.

"You guys should come over tonight." He saw my expression and cut me off. "Just listen… it's just Rose, her new boyfriend, Alice and me. We could even call Angela and Ben. It would be good for her to do something normal again." I knew he was right, and as usual I was shocked that something that made sense came out of Jasper.

"Yeah, you're right. I'll talk to her. I don't think she'll go for it, though," I said. My parents still had my car and refused to give it back, so I asked Jasper if he could give me a lift to Bella's. Once I walked inside her house, I was greeted to something I hadn't seen in a long while. Bella was dressed, her hair done, and she was cooking.

"Hi," she said, as I walked into the kitchen.

"Hey, baby," I said, wrapping my arms around her from behind, as she continued to stir whatever she was cooking; it smelled great.

"Hungry?" she asked.

"Very. Whatcha cookin'?" I asked.

"It's something new I thought I'd try, it's like a baked… Alfredo pasta... thing," she said laughing. It was so nice to hear her laugh again. It seemed like years since I had heard it last.

"Sounds awesome," I said, reluctantly letting her go so she could finish cooking. She seemed like she was in a good mood at that moment. I really wanted to bring up the small party over at Jasper's, but I didn't want to say anything to upset her.

"So, Jasper drove me over here," I said as a way to bring up his invite.

"That was nice of him," she said conversationally.

"He said that Alice is really missing you," I said carefully and quietly. I saw her body stiffen a little. She hadn't been very good about returning Alice's calls or seeing her best friend. She'd really been isolating herself, and I didn't want that to become a permanent thing for her. When I got no response from her, I continued on.

"Jasper invited us over tonight, just Alice and Rose... her new boyfriend. Maybe Angela and Ben-"

"No," she cut me off.

"No?" I ask, surprised she just shut down the idea so fast.

"That's right, no." Her back was still to me, but I could see that her whole posture and body language had changed.

"Really? I mean we haven't done anything for-"

"I said no! If you want to go, go, but I have no reason to. Leave it alone," she snapped, turning around to face me. With a big sigh, and tears now in her eyes, she turned back to the stove, and I felt like shit for killing her good mood. I could hear her crying after that. I walked up behind her to apologize, but as soon as my hands touched her body she shook them off.

"God! Just leave me alone," she said as she walked out of the kitchen. I let out a huge breath and leaned over the stove. I turned the burners off and moved the food to the side.

"Fuck," I muttered to myself. This wasn't like Bella, and I knew she wasn't herself at the moment, but knowing that didn't make me feel any better at the time. I stood there berating myself, I shouldn't have pushed her. I knew I shouldn't have, and I did it anyway. It had only been a few days since the funeral. What the fuck was wrong with me to try to push her?

"Bad day?" I stood up quick to see Renee pouring a cup of coffee.

"I guess," I said.

"What's up?" she asked, sitting down at the kitchen table.

"Nothing," I said, getting ready to walk out of the room.

"Hold it there, speedy," she said. I turned, and she pulled a chair out motioning for me to sit down next to her. I walked over and sat down.

"It's not 'nothing' because I had a relatively happy daughter today, no tears... that I had seen yet. A daughter that I just saw run up the stairs... crying?" Fuck, I already felt like shit, I knew I had fucked up.

"I'm sorry, Renee, I didn't mean to upset her." It was the truth.

"I'm not blaming you, Edward. I'm sure you didn't do anything. Bella is very... sensitive right now... and she will be for a while. I'm just hoping that you'll be patient enough to put up with it." I was shocked. She wasn't upset with me for upsetting Bella, she was worried I would get tired of it and leave.

"I'm fine, I can handle it. I just feel bad for upsetting her," I said, looking at my hands.

"What was all that about anyway?" She asked. "If you don't mind," she added, taking a sip of her coffee. I knew that if I didn't want to answer it would have been ok. Renee wasn't pushy, she was just curious.

"Jasper invited us over tonight, and I thought that it would be nice for her to see Alice again and... I dunno... just get out, you know? Just take a break and get out, have some fun," I explained.

"But, she refused to go and when you pushed it, she flipped," Renee said as a statement, like she had seen the same behavior from Bella. I just nodded.

"It's gonna be tough for a while," she said softly. "Don't beat yourself up, Edward. She's fragile right now, not herself. Just give her a little time." Her voice broke at the end, and when I looked up, Renee had tears in her eyes. It seemed that I forgot at times just how much this was killing Renee. She played tough for Bella, but she was obviously dying on the inside.

"God, Renee, I'm so sorry. You don't need to deal with this right now."

"Psh, are you kidding me? I would love to deal with other people's problems right now than to face my own," she said with a watery smile, knocking my shoulder with hers. God, I wish my mom was like that. I could talk to her, she didn't always approve or even understand sometimes, but she didn't act like I was stupid and that everything I said was meaningless.

"Speaking of other people's problems, how are things at home," she asked, once she had stopped her tears. I gave her a look that probably said it all.

"That bad, huh?" When I didn't answer, she said, "Tell me," as threatening as she could. We both laughed.

"Honestly... not good. They were being... _ok _but since the... the..."

"The funeral, it's ok, you can say it," she said softly. I gave her a weak smile.

"Yeah, since then, they've gone back to being horrible again. It's only a matter of time before they find out about football and then they're really gonna freak," I explained.

"You and Bella are both so young and are going through things that most adults don't even have to go through. Hang in there and be strong for each other. Be there for Bella and let her be there for you." I gave her a look.

"I'm serious, Edward. Just because she's having a hard time doesn't mean that she wants to be shut out of your life. She wants to know if you're having a bad day... week, whatever. Lean on her, too, or else one of you will resent the other." We heard a sniffle behind us and both turned to see Bella in the doorway.

"Edward... can, I uh... talk to you?" she asked quietly, nodding her head toward the living room.

"No need to leave, I was just heading out. Going to meet the ladies for lunch," Renee said, jumping up and leaving me in the kitchen alone with Bella... an angry Bella? I wasn't so sure just then. She didn't seem angry anymore, but she did just hear me and her mom talking about her, so who knew.

"It's nice... that they're keeping her busy." I just looked at her confused.

"My mom. Her friends, they've been trying to keep her busy. That's nice of them," she explained.

"It is," I said. I was smart enough to not say I had been _trying_ to do just that with her and she wouldn't let me. I didn't need to say it though, she knew what I was thinking.

"That's the thing, Edward, that's what _she_ needs - to be busy. I don't, I'm not like that; I need time. I didn't mean to snap at you, and I'm trying so hard not to. I just-"

I cut her off, I wasn't upset with her. "It's ok, I'm sorry I pushed you." She gave me a soft smile.

"I'm just not ready to face a lot of people yet. I know I have to go back to school and stuff... and I will, I just don't want to face a lot of people if I don't have to." I understood that. We had talked about how she didn't want to answer questions, or hear people tell her they were sorry anymore. She just wanted to go on as normal as possible and that was almost impossible in a small town like this.

We talked the rest of the afternoon. Bella's smile came back, and by the end of the conversation we understood where each other was coming from much better. I updated her on what was going at home for me, and Renee was right, Bella was happy that I did. What I told her worried her, but she admitted to feeling shut out - not protected - when I had told her nothing before.

"What a gross day," she said, looking out the kitchen window.

"I know, it's really cold, too," I said.

"This is the perfect day for movies and naps... I think that's exactly what we should do," she decided, and I agreed.

We picked out a movie and took it up to her room. Bella dove under the covers of her made bed while I put the movie in. I slipped my shoes off, joining her under the covers. Almost instantly Bella and I fell asleep, tired from the exhausting week.

I woke to wet kisses on my neck and a hand playing with the button on my pants. Thinking I was dreaming, I ingnored it. The kisses never stopped, though, and my pants got tighter. All of a sudden, there was a tight grip on my dick. Shocked, I opened my eyes to see Bella with her hand down my pants and she was... naked.

"Fuck," I groaned reaching out to softly grab her chest. She moaned and continued to take my pants off. I assisted her and shimmied out of them. She laid kissed on my legs and worked her way back up to my neck.

"Sorry for waking you up," she whispered, nibbling on my ear.

"You can wake me up like this anytime," I said, rolling over on top of her. She giggled and it was the best sound I had ever heard. I had missed happy, carefree Bella so much. Quickly, I reached for my shirt and pulled it over my head, wanting to have nothing on, just like Bella. I started kissing her neck, her breasts, anything I could get my mouth on. I had been so fucking horny for so long, but didn't want to push her. I knew when she was ready she would let me know... I guess she was ready.

Every time we had sex in the past it had been pretty soft and slow, I had never wanted to hurt her. That time, though, it didn't seem like Bella wanted soft and slow. She was almost desperate and frantic in her motions; it was turning me on.

"Oh, God... Edward, I need you," Bella moaned, as I sucked on her nipple, her chest arching off the bed. I moved my hand down her stomach and slipped two fingers in her, making her breath catch. I continued to work her as she squirmed and moaned below me. I knew that once I was in her, I wouldn't last long, so I wanted her to get as much pleasure as she could before we got that far.

She was clawing at my back and grabbing my hair, shouting my name as she climaxed. Exhausted, she lay limp on her back, her breath coming in pants.

"So good," she said, reaching for me to kiss. Looking down at her, I had a brief moment of clear judgment, then panic. Was she ready for this? Was she just doing this to make me happy?

"Bella, we don't have to do this," I said softly nuzzling her neck.

"You don't want to?" she asked, running her hands softly through my hair.

"Of course I do, but I will always _want_ to, it doesn't mean you have to," I explained.

"I want to, Edward. I need to feel close to you... please." She started peppering kisses on my neck, her fingers gently caressing my back. Frantic Bella was gone; I was afraid that sad Bella would be back soon. I reached one hand down hooking it behind her knee and brought her leg up as I entered her.

"Jesus," I moaned, when I was as deep in her as I could go. Holding her one leg, I started to move in and out of her slowly. Bella was moaning and meeting my thrusts. Her head thrown back and eyes clenched shut she screamed out as she came.

Once she calmed a bit, she started to sit up a little. I finally understood that she was trying to get me to roll us over. Without removing my dick from its favorite place, I rolled us over so that I was on my back and she was bouncing on top of me!

"Oh... feels so good," she panted, as she rode my dick. I took a miniute to give attention to each breast, squeezing her nipples before I placed my hands firmly on her hips. I guided her and felt her movements and it was so good. Before I knew it, I reached my climax and Bella was lying on my chest, with me still inside of her. We didn't speak for a long while, I just ran my hands up and down her back and she played with my hair.

"I love you... so much," I whispered into her ear. I heard her sniffle, but couldn't see her face to know if she was really crying.

After a minute she replied, "I love you, too... thank you, Edward."

At that moment, I felt a tear fall onto my shoulder. I knew she wasn't thanking me for the sex, but for everything. Every step in our relationship had been met with resistance. So far, we'd been able to overcome every situation and remain close to each other, never letting it get to our relationship. At that moment, I hugged her body close to mine and knew that we would be ok.

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	23. Chapter 23 When it Hits the Fan

**Hey! I hope everyone is having an awesome summer so far!**

**Big thanks to Whatobsession17 for going over this chapter! Love you bb!**

**Thanks to everyone that reads this story and takes the time to review!**

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They say you're getting better

But you don't feel any better

Your speakers are blowing

Your ears are wrecking

Your hearing damage

You wish you felt better

You wish you felt better

Hearing Damage by Thom Yorke

BPOV

The stares, the looks, the questions, I couldn't take much more. It had been two weeks since I returned to school and two weeks of the same scrutiny. These weren't the people I went to school with as grew up with. These weren't the people who knew my dad.

Those people - teachers and kids alike - were just that: people. Random faces in the school I had transferred to only months ago. Months ago, when I lived a different life.

I sat in my desk and stared at the grain in the wood, waiting for class to start; I was early. I thought about my old school. I missed my friends... I missed Alice... I missed my dad. The pain had not lessened - not at all; I had just learned to hide it better.

Edward worried, he couldn't hide it. Things had been good between us, though, well as good as they could be. I tried to put a smile on when I saw him, but he saw right through it, he was the only one who did. We had made a huge effort to be open with each other. I told him about my pain, and he told me his. That is what had kept us close.

Our lives, our situations, _the world_… they were all trying their hardest to pull us apart, but it didn't work. Instead of letting the stress break us and turn us against one another, we just turned and flipped it all off together.

His parents were... evil. There was no other word for it. They were heartless and brutal. His mother had insisted on me coming for dinner the previous week. She had said I shouldn't be cooped up and after everything had happened she needed to make things right with me again. I appreciated her wanting to fix things and figured even though it was a terribly hard thing for me to do, I should do it. If my having dinner at Edward's house would make Elizabeth happy, and that would help make Edward's life better, I had to do it.

When I had gotten there, his parents - _both_ of them - were there, and Emmett was, too. I stiffened immediately, not expecting to see the two men Edward had worked so hard to keep me away from. His dad had completely ignored that I was alive, which was fine with me. Emmett gave me a sad smile and walked over to us, hesitantly. Edward stepped in front of me, ready to tell Em were to go, I'm sure. I had stopped him, though. I had found the card from Emmett and I was over everything. When one of the most important people in your life dies, old shit and grudges... they just don't matter anymore. Did I trust him? No, and I never would again, but I was done being angry.

"Hey." Shame, he wreaked of it.

"Hi," I said back. I gave Edward a pointed look, and asked him for a minute alone with Emmett. Edward had been standing there like a guard dog and it was too much. I think Emmett had learned his lesson and it was more than obvious how scared of Edward he was. Reluctantly, Edward walked out of the entryway and into the living room. He had made sure to threaten Emmett on the way out, though. I rolled my eyes.

"So," he'd said after Edward was gone.

"So," I said back.

"Did you get my card?" he asked.

"Yeah, I got it. Thanks." He had wasted no more time with small talk after that, jumping right in.

"God, Bella... I can't... you don't know how sorry I am," he had said, stepping forward, ready to wrap me up in a hug. I took a large step back.

"No, I don't want to do this, Emmett. I know you're sorry. What's done is done. I forgive you, and I've moved on. I've learned that there are more important things in life than holding a grudge." A smile came across his face.

I felt bad for what I had said next, but he needed to know. "This doesn't make us friends again, Emmett. I can't trust you. I forgive you, but you continue to hurt the person I love more than anything in this world, and I will never be ok with that." Those had been my parting words to Emmett as I left him standing in the doorway.

Emmett had continued to try to make Edward's life a living hell, and someone who had hurt the man I love had no place in my life. I had not spoken to Emmett since everything went down. I'd kept the hurt inside. He was my best friend, and he had betrayed me. I sat back and let Edward, my dad, and even Alice fight my battles. It had been time for me to step out of their shadows and tell Emmett how I felt. It was hard and I had had tears in my eyes throughout the conversation, but I stood up for myself and I knew Charlie would have been proud.

After that, I figured the evening could only get better. His mom had come up to me with a grandiose fake greeting. It was all bullshit, though.

She had pulled me aside first thing, letting me know how much stress my family and I were putting on Edward. How, if I really loved him, I would let him go. The conversation ended with the last sentence I would ever be willing to listen to from that awful woman.

"And, Bella, one last thing. It's been about a month now... don't you think you're being a little fragile?" she had said with a patronizing look. Her hands had been on both my shoulders. I shrugged them off.

_Fragile?_ The bitch was crazy, and I was done. Edward hadn't wanted me to come over, he begged me not to, and I didn't listen - I should have listened, I would next time. I wanted to hit her and call her a bitch. I wanted to more than I had ever desired it in my entire life. I didn't, though; that's what she wanted. I had turned from his mother and walked straight to the front door, leaving it open as I walked away from the house, and into the darkness. I hadn't belonged there and planned to never go back. Edward, of course, was quick to catch up to me. He found me in tears, and went back and started a huge war with his parents. I wished he hadn't; that was exactly what they wanted. I had sat in that cold, dark driveway, listening to World War III go down in the house.

I felt a tear escape my eye and watched it hit the top of my desk, the liquid making the grain look magnified. I started singing a song to myself, thinking of episodes of South Park, anything I could do to keep myself from thinking of what had happened that night; I wanted to make the tears stop before anyone noticed. I was early to class and Jasper would be there any minute, he would notice and he would tell Edward. My tears were nothing new, and Edward would worry.

I didn't have to look up to know that Jasper was in the room, I could hear him playing the finger drums on every hard surface in the class room as he made his way to the chair that was next to mine. Then I heard his greeting.

"Bubbb- Swanie!" He said as he put both hands on my shoulders, shaking me a little. I started to laugh and quickly wiped the moisture from my eyes before he could notice.

"Hi, Jasper," I said.

"What's it gonna be today? Hangman? Tic Tackle Toe?"

"Definitely not Tic Tackle Toe," I said. I will only make that mistake once. I had learned that if Jasper ever had his own 'twist' on a game, just say no. He always wanted to play a game in that class and ignore the teacher.

"How about the game... let's listen to Mrs. Harris. We never play that," I said enthusiastically.

"Because it's probably the lamest game to be known to all mankind that were placed on this green-"

"OK, ok, Hangman then," I said, to cut his rambling off. I couldn't blame him, though. Mrs. Harris was like ninety and boring as hell to listen to.

So that's what we did, we played games, laughed, talked about Alice and Edward, and passed headphones back and forth, sharing music. And for that sixty minutes I felt normal.

~E*B~

The weeks passed and not much changed.

I would wait for Edward to show, he did. We would have as nice of time as possible. He'd be the only thing that could make my smile a genuine one.

I would wait for Edward to show, he didn't. His parents were being shitty again. I would stay up and worry all night, and I would remind myself that we only have to deal with them for three more months.

I would pretend like I enjoyed girl's night with Alice, I didn't. I would think to myself, _if I could just keep the tears away for one day it would be a miracle. _

I lived with my mom and we tried to be normal, neither one of us were normal anymore.

I felt like I was just surviving, not living. I wondered if it would ever change. No matter how those days went, they always ended the same; with me crying myself to sleep.

~E*B~

"... In the bathroom?"

"Yeah," I admitted sheepishly.

"The car?"

"No, too much of a chance of being caught."

"Oh, it's worth it, you two have to!" God, Alice was way too excited to discuss 'awesome' places to have sex.

"How are things going with your dad?" I asked, trying to change the subject. We were sitting in her room, gorging on pizza, a movie played in the background, but we weren't paying attention.

"Better, he really is trying," she admitted. Ever since my dad died, Dale had opened his eyes. He was really trying to make his relationship right with Alice.

"That's good."

"How have you been, Bella?" Alice asked quietly.

"Good... I'm good, Alice."

"No, really?" She always saw right through me.

"Shitty, so shitty, Alice. I could just kill Edward's parents." For the next hour I bitched to Alice about everything that had been going on, and like an awesome friend, she listened and offered advice. It felt nice to talk to Alice again. To really talk.

"How's everything at school?" I asked after we hashed everything out in my life.

She shrugged, "Oh, you know. Just trying to make it through, so I can move on and out."

"Have you heard back from anywhere?" I asked.

"Yeah," she said quietly.

I was excited for her. "Well, where, Alice?"

"Bella, we don't have to..." she trailed off.

"No, don't do this. I made my own choices, I'm happy for you." Alice didn't agree with my choice to not apply to colleges, but I couldn't leave Renee, even if she had insisted.

"Well, U Dub, was a big, fat, nasty no," she said rolling her eyes. "But Western and Washington State accepted us."

"That's great! Have you decided?"

"Yeah, we sent our notice of acceptance in to Western. Bellingham it is," she said with a smile. I reached over and hugged her. Even though I would miss her, Bellingham was close enough to visit. The rest of the night went well. It was the most 'normal' night that I had had since my dad died. There were still tears and pain, but there was also laughter and fun.

I stayed the night at Alice's. Jasper called her to say goodnight. I kept my phone on me, but it never rang. Edward would try his hardest, but he could only call if there was no chance of being caught.

Even with being distracted at Alice's, my night still ended the same, in tears.

~E*B~

I waited for Edward by the front door; he was supposed to be there by then. I didn't want to think about my lame routine of the past weeks, but I had nothing to distract me. My mom was at work, she couldn't take any more time off. I planned to find a job soon to help her. She didn't want me to, but it didn't matter. She wanted me to focus on graduation, go to school and live my life, but I wouldn't do that. Leave town, leave her alone and lonely.

I heard a car door slam and knew Edward was finally there. I opened the door and met him in the driveway. His cheeks were flushed, jaw clenched. Something was wrong and I'd bet everything it was his parents. It always was.

"You ok?" I asked, as he wrapped his arms around me. I leaned in and breathed his scent, it would never get old.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he said. He didn't sound fine.

So I let him know. "You don't sound fine."

He laughed at me, it was a bitter laugh. "Yeah, well, I think my dad is on to the fact that I'm not playing football. I'm surprised it took him this long."

"Shit," I said, still pressed against his chest as he leaned against the car.

"Shit, is right." Nothing else needed to be said. We both knew that would happen sooner or later and knew it wouldn't be good. We just didn't know how bad it would be. After a long while of just holding each other and just... being, he broke the silence.

"This may be my last night of freedom for a while, let's enjoy it." I didn't like it, but I knew it was probably true. I felt the tears coming, but I willed them away; I wouldn't spend his last night of freedom in tears. Without another word, we climbed into his car... wait, his car.

"How did you get your car?"

"I just took it. I know I'm in deep, he was calling people about football when I left. I figured that it couldn't get worse, so I took it." It made sense, but I felt that it could _always _get worse and I wished he wouldn't push them. I didn't say anything, though.

"Tonight, we don't worry, ok?" He said to me, leaning over the center console, kissing me passionately. I couldn't disagree.

"I love you," I said, kissing him again.

Next thing I knew, the car was in gear, and we were off. We drove in silence, just enjoying each other's company. In no time, Edward was pulling up to the little patch of grass - our meadow as we called it. He had a blanket in the trunk, and we spread it out on the grass, ready to enjoy our day.

"Alice said she and Jasper are going to Western next year," I said.

"Really?" he asked. I nodded. "That's good, it's not too far." I nodded again. "Bella, I know you don't want to leave your mom, but..." I sat up and stared at him in horror, was he going to leave me?

"Calm down," he said, pulling me back down to the blanket.

"I was just gonna say that I can't stay here after I turn eighteen. I need to get away from them, Bella. They're draining the life outta me." I knew it was true, and I wanted him to get away, but what did that mean for us?

"What are you planning?" I asked quietly, scared to hear the answer.

"Well, you said you wanted to take classes in Port Angeles, why don't we move there? I'd like to be farther away from them than that, but for now it's better than being here in Forks, and you'll still be close enough to your mom."

Was he asking me to move in with him? We had never talked about it before.

"You want me to move to Port Angeles with you?''

"Yeah, after graduation. I won't make it that long, though. I have to get out of there. Jasper's mom said I could move into their house after I turn eighteen, but not before, she doesn't want any legal problems. After graduation, though… yeah, I want to move with you... if you want to," he added, quietly.

"I would love to!" I said, kissing him. A beautiful smile came across his face. I thought he had a perfect plan. Moving far enough away from his parents, especially if they didn't know where we went. Yet, we'd be staying close enough to my mom and we could take classes there.

It felt good to have a plan, something to look forward to. In just a couple short months we'd be free and could really start our lives. We could both start to heal from what we had been through, but I knew we couldn't even begin until we were away from his parents.

We lay on the blanket, stealing kisses and touches. We could both feel the impending doom that was about to rain down upon us, but we did our best to ignore it and enjoy our day together.

EPOV

"Fuck off!" I screamed, slamming my door shut; locking it. Shit had just hit the fan. They knew everything, they threatened Emmett, and he spilled. They knew everything! Spending Christmas week at Bella's, my cell phone... _everything_! My dad had just found out that I hadn't been to football since last year. He was losing his shit. My mom was, as well. I had come home from Bella's about an hour before that and found them searching my room. They had found the phone charger, which led to them finding the phone. In my bedside table, my mom had found the bottles of pills prescribed by my mom's doctor friend that I obviously never took. I heard my mom screaming for me to open the door.

"No! You're fucking crazy!" I shouted.

My cussing at them didn't help anything, but I wasn't going to be abused anymore. Dad was slamming on my door, demanding that I open it, and I was packing a bag as fast as I could.

"Go to hell!" I shouted. I figured I was fucked; I might as well say what I wanted.

I never wanted to run, but I knew it would be worse than anything ever had been and I needed to get out.

My heart was racing; I could feel the sweat gathering on my forehead. I would never admit it, but I was scared of the motherfucker. All of a sudden, everything was quiet, too quiet. The pounding stopped, as well as the screaming. I didn't slow down, though. Something was off, so I moved faster. I threw the basics in a bag, opened my window, and climbed out just as I heard his drill start taking my door down.

I scaled down the wall of my house the best I could, and ended up having to jump from pretty high. When I landed, I knew I fucked up my ankle; I heard something snap. I ignored it, and ran the best I could. I couldn't go to Bella's, I didn't want to lead them there. I reached in my wallet for Officer Dan's card, but remembered they had found my phone and took it away. I could hear my dad's voice screaming behind me, my damn ankle was slowing me down. I gritted my teeth against the pain and moved faster, praying I could get somewhere, anywhere, before he caught up to me.

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***Hides* Sorry about the cliffie. The next chapter is about done, so you won't have to wait long, promise!**

**Please take a minute and let me know what you think!**


	24. Chapter 24 Confronting

**Wow, the last chapters had almost double the reviews as normal! Thank you all so so much! **

**HUGE Thank you to Whatobsession17 who pre-read while trying to find a house and move and to Mamma4ever who beta'd. She stayed up well past midnight after painting her house, in the summer heat, to get this chapter ready for today. Love you ladies, thank you so much!**

**SM owns Twilight... you knew that, right? **

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And now it seems that I have found,

Nothing at all,

I wanna hear your voice out loud,

Slow it down, slow it down,

Without it all,

I'm choking on nothing,

It's clear in my head,

that I'm screaming for something,

Knowing nothing is better than knowing it all.

On my own

On My Own by The Used

**BPOV**

"Did you pick up Edward?" I asked into the phone to Jasper who was barely awake.

"What?" he asked groggily.

"Edward."

"Who?" My God, was he high or still asleep?

"Edward, Jasper! Your best friend, Edward!" I shouted into the phone.

"Fuck, Swanie, don't gotta yell at me. No, I didn't pick Edward up, I'm still in bed," he said.

"Ok, thanks," I said hanging up the phone, not bothering to say goodbye. I already knew he didn't pick Edward up, he never had before. I just didn't know who to call. I had called Edward's phone over and over with no answer; the phone was off. I had a bad feeling and was starting to panic.

I had driven to Edward's to pick him up where I always had - one block from his house - out of his parents' eyesight. That morning he wasn't there. I'd been late before, I hadn't shown up before, but not him. He was always there, and on time.

I'd been sitting there for thirty minutes waiting for him to show. When he had taken his car and come over the night before, after his parents finding out about football, I knew he'd be facing major consequences, but I still expected him to go to school.

I sat on the side of the road in my dad's truck, wondering what I should do next. I thought that maybe he had driven to school since he had his car the night before and maybe he forgot to call and tell me. So I decided to drive there and see. My hands were shaking the whole way; I just knew something was wrong.

Pulling into the lot, my heart was in my throat. I already had a feeling that I wouldn't see his Volvo, but I was hoping that I was wrong and he'd be sitting on the hood, waiting for me, like he had in the past. I drove around the small lot four times before I accepted he wasn't there. Pulling into a spot, I called his phone again. No answer. School had already started by then, and I was making myself sick worrying about Edward. I wondered if maybe he found his own way to school and was inside wondering where I was.

With that final thought, I decided to go ahead to my next class; second period was only fifteen minutes away. I had that class with Jasper; hopefully he would have seen Edward by then. My third class was with Edward, and if I didn't see him in it, then I would really panic.

I walked into my second class to see Jasper in his seat still half asleep.

"What was going on this morning?" he asked, scratching his head.

"I went to pick Edward up, and he wasn't there. I thought maybe you had seen him."

"No, sorry. Maybe mother dearest brought him to school?" he offered as a possibility.

"Yeah, maybe," I replied, not really thinking so. If she did, it would have been the first time she ever had, and highly unlikely with how much trouble he was probably in.

I sat through the whole class chewing my nails and trying not to ignore Jasper. My stomach was in knots, I seriously thought I was going to throw up by the time the bell rang. Without saying goodbye, I grabbed my stuff and ran out of the classroom, eager to see Edward in our next class.

When I made it to the classroom, after tripping a few times from nearly running, my heart sank seeing his chair empty. I sat in my own chair figuring he still had a few minutes to get to class. The three minutes it took for the final bell to ring felt like three hours, and he never showed. That wasn't right, Edward didn't skip classes.

The teacher was in the middle of a sentence when I stood and walked out of the classroom. I could feel eyes on me as I exited, but I didn't care. People had already thought I acted weird since my dad died, and before that I had been the new girl, so I didn't care what they thought anymore.

I climbed back into my truck and drove the path we took to and from school; no sight of him anywhere. Feeling like I was going to throw up, I finally stopped and did just that. I'm sure to anyone else they would think I was crazy; that it wasn't a big deal to go for a day without talking to or seeing your boyfriend, but I just knew something was wrong. After being sick on the side of the road, I jumped back into my truck and headed home - I didn't know where else to go.

I had to wait four hours for Alice to get out of school. I spent them calling Edward's phone, chewing my nails, cleaning - but not really, I was just trying to stay busy. Alice came straight over as soon as she could.

"What's going on? You called me like four times," she said, setting her backpack and keys down.

"I can't find Edward," I spit out, sounding ridiculously panicked.

"What do you mean you can't find Edward? Is he hiding?" she asked, her eyebrows raised.

I rolled my eyes at her. "No, he's not freaking hiding, Alice! He came over last night and thought his parents found out about football… he also took his car. He wasn't in our spot so I could pick him up for school… he never showed, and he's not answering the phone."

"Shit," she said. Alice knew all the details about Edward's home life.

"So, when did you see or talk to him last?"

"After he left last night, he texted me when he got home… before he went inside." I started to tear up; the text had just said that he loved me.

"Calm down, let's just think this through, ok?" she said, as she walked over to the couch.

"What has you so freaked out?" she asked. It was a good question. What was I so freaked out about? Was I worried that his parents would make him miserable... yes, but that wouldn't have me panicked. Was I worried that they might hurt him? I guess I was.

"I'm afraid they'll hurt him," I said honestly. Most people would act like I was stupid and overreacting, but not Alice, because she knew the truth about those psychos.

"You really think they might hurt him?" she asked, starting to look a little panicked herself.

"I dunno, Alice. They're seriously crazy! I mean look at all they've taken away from him, and he still didn't do what they wanted him to. Who knows what extremes they'd go to?"

"Ok, well he hasn't been gone for a whole day yet, so let's just calm down and think of other reasons he might not show up for school. He could be sick?"

"He could be, I guess. He was fine last night, though," I said, truly not thinking he was sick.

"Why wouldn't he answer his phone?" I added.

"Well, when I'm sick, I sleep," she said, shrugging.

"You're right, ok," I agreed. There had to be a reasonable explanation for why he was gone. With everything that had happened with my dad, I seemed to panic easier. I took a deep breath and forced myself to calm down. My level of hysteria that morning had been irrational and I knew I would feel stupid when Edward did call and say he was just home sick or something... I hoped he would call soon.

Alice and I spent the next few hours doing homework together, then after a while she had to go home. My mom was working late, and I was doing my best to keep my worry in check. I still called Edward every hour or so, praying I would hear his voice on the other end... I never did.

When my mom finally got home from work, she said the same thing as Alice, but I could hear a hint of worry in her voice. Like me, it seemed like she knew that something just wasn't right.

I went to bed that night with my phone in my hand and my window open. I didn't sleep; I lay in bed, my stomach getting more and more sick. Around four a.m., I couldn't take lying there anymore, so I went downstairs and wrapped myself in a blanket. I sat on the front porch and prayed I would see him walk up the street. I knew it wouldn't happen. I knew Edward was in trouble, and if he wasn't at school the next morning, I would be making a trip to that house myself.

**~E*B~**

I was dressed and ready to leave early the next morning. I had only slept about two hours. My head was pounding and the knots in my stomach had only tightened. Edward still hadn't called. Climbing into my truck, I took a few deep breaths. I had already planned to go to Edward's house if he wasn't at school in order to see what was going on. I felt bad for not going over sooner; Edward would've been at my door at the first sign something wasn't right. My house wasn't like Edward's, though. Renee would've opened the door, given him a hug, and filled him in on what was going on. I expected a cold shoulder at best from Edward's mom. At worst, well, I don't even want to think about that.

Pulling out of the driveway, I rolled down the window, the spring sun heating the cabin of the truck. I pushed the speed limit, whispering my apologies to Charlie as I made my way to the spot where I usually picked Edward up. I arrived there thirty minutes early. Nervously, I sat. I played with the radio and with the games on my phone waiting for time to pass. When it was fifteen minutes past the time he was supposed to show, I decided to make my move.

I pulled into his driveway and everything was silent. The house, the yard; it was fairly obvious that no one was home. Even so, I got out of the truck to knock on the front door. On my path to the door, passing Edward's car that was just sitting in the driveway, I paused to run my hand over the driver's side door. When I made it to the front door, I felt myself shaking, I didn't know what to expect.

I knocked on the door, and I could see my hand shaking. There was no answer. I knocked again and again, it went ignored. I walked around the side of the house and looked up to Edward's window, the light was off and there was no sign of life.

As I was walking away, defeated, I noticed something that made me stop. The outside of their house was as flawless as the inside. The white pant almost unmarked, thanks to Emmett and Edward being forced to pressure wash it often. There was a flaw, though. It was right below Edward's window and it led to a path on the ground. Scuff marks, like from tennis-shoes. Scuff marks that could easily be from the black Vans that Edward always wore. My heart starting pounding and I felt sweaty as the realization hit me.

Edward had _ran_. It was so obvious that he had ran. The scuff marks stopped way too high up; he must have jumped. The flowers below his window had been smashed. He had run, he may have needed help and I hadn't been there for him. All this was coming down on me and my legs wanted to give out. He was gone and I had no idea where he was or if he was ok.

I didn't know what to do. I wished my dad were there more than ever and that thought brought tears to my eyes. I had no idea what to do, but he would, and he would never be there to ask again. My chest started to tighten; I could feel myself slipping into a panic attack. Leaning against the house, on top of the smashed flowers, I took deep breaths. I could feel tears running down my face, but didn't wipe them away until I could breathe normally again.

Once I was in control of myself, I ran to my truck, throwing it into gear, and sped to my old school. I needed Alice. Parking in the first spot I saw, I jumped out of my truck and ran toward the school. I hadn't been in that building since the day I had been basically strip-searched. I quickly decided I really didn't want to step foot into it, so I walked back out and called Alice, praying she would answer. She didn't. A few minutes passed and my phone dinged, alerting me to a text. It was Alice.

_I'm in class, what's up? _

As quickly as I could, I sent her a message back.

_It's Edward. I went to his house, he's gone Ali_

It took less than two minutes for Alice to fly out the front door.

"What do you mean he's gone?" she demanded.

"I went to his house. His car was the only one there and no one answered the door." I went on to explain what I had found on the side of his house and my theory on him running away. Alice started pacing in front of my truck.

"We should call your mom," she finally said. I didn't want to. She was already so stressed out. My dad had been gone less than two months, she didn't need that.

"I don't want to put this on her."

Alice nodded understanding. "Well, let's call Jasper." I wasn't sure how that would help. However, Jasper was more level-headed, he wouldn't panic as much; maybe it would be good to have him there. Alice was on the phone when I saw a teacher coming out. I didn't want to deal with any of them, so I pulled Alice to the other side of my truck. When she got off the phone with Jasper, she told me he said to meet him over at his house. We both jumped into her car and made our way over. When we pulled up to his house, Jasper was leaning up against his car smoking.

"Ugh, I wish he'd stop that," Alice said as we parked in the drive way. As we got out of the car, Jasper walked over to us, first trying to kiss Alice.

"Uh uh. Nope, you know I won't kiss you after you've been sucking on a death stick," she said, with the palm of her hand on Jasper's forehead, effectively keeping his lips away from her. Jasper just rolled his eyes and sat back on her car.

"So what's going on?" he asked. Alice and I, talking rapidly over each other, replayed the story to Jasper.

"Well, let's go over and wait for the crazy fuckers to get home," he said, shrugging.

"They know if he ran and why, so we wait on their porch until they tell us," he added, when Alice and I didn't seem excited about his idea.

"Ok," I agreed. He was right. There was really nothing else to do. Making our way back over to Edward's house, I was praying silently in my head to God, my dad, whoever wanted to listen, that Edward was ok.

Pulling up to the Masen's house, everything looked the same as when I was there before. Jasper and Alice both walked around the house and agreed with me that it did look like Edward had made a run for it.

We made ourselves comfortable on the front porch, waiting for someone to come home. It wasn't too hot out, but the sun pounding down on us was making it uncomfortable. Jasper was playing the drums on the railing of the porch and it was driving me crazy. I wanted to tell him to stop, but didn't because I was so grateful for him being there. I was very glad when Alice told him to knock it the hell off, though.

Hours later, when the sun was starting to set, a car pulled into the driveway and it was Edward's mom. My heart started to pound, and I could feel my face getting hot. I hated confrontation so much, but I was so pissed and worried at that point that I would do whatever I had to do to figure out where Edward was.

Elizabeth slowly got out of the car, gathering her things, acting like she didn't see us. I knew she did. All three of us stood up, ready to face her. Calmly, she walked up to the front porch where the three of us stood. When she reached us, she turned and clicked a button on her keychain making the car beep, indicating that it was locked. Coolly she turned to face us, but she only looked at me.

"Hmm, funny seeing you here after you ran away from dinner, causing a huge fight between my son and me," she said.

"Where is he?" I asked ignoring her rude comment. She ignored me right back digging into her purse.

"I believe this belongs to you," she said, pulling out Edward's silver cell phone; my heart dropped. She had her hand outstretched, but I made no attempt to take it from her.

"I find it very immature of you and your mother to go out of your way to violate the rules I set for _my_ son."

"Well if you weren't so crazy no one would have to 'violate the rules'," Alice said with fury. I was still too shocked at the sight of his phone. Why did she have it, how did she find it?

"Excuse me, young lady?" Elizabeth snapped, with anger in her voice.

"You heard me. I think you're nuts! Where is Edward?" Alice demanded.

"If you think I will allow you to speak that way to me young lady, you have another thing coming," Elizabeth said softly, trying to keep her composure. You could see the fury in her eyes, though.

"Well it's a damn good thing you're not my mother -"

I put my hand on Alice's arm, stopping her from verbally attacking Edward's mom, even though I was enjoying it.

"Elizabeth, we're all worried, can you please just tell us where Edward is?" I begged.

"I can," she said, setting her brief case down, smoothing her hair behind her ears.

"Isabella, he just couldn't take any more. He said you and your mother were draining him. That because of you, he had to quit football. He wanted to leave you, but didn't know how. He begged us to send him away to finish his school year, so he could actually enjoy it... not babysit a needy little girl his senior." My jaw was on the floor, what was she saying? Edward left me? She continued on before I could figure it out.

"So we did what was best for our son, and sent him where he wanted to go... away... from... you," she said spacing out the last words for effect. I could feel my heart pounding in my ears, my world crashing around me. He left me. Tears hot and thick as blood were threatening to spill, but I would not cry in front of her.

I heard clapping from behind me and we all turned to see Jasper. He looked _pissed_.

"Wow, great performance, nut case! Here's the deal, though. We all know how much Ed loves Bella, so why don't you just tell us the truth. We know he didn't leave her. There are giant scuff marks under his window. He ran from someone alright… you! Where the hell is Edward?" he demanded. Alice and I stood shocked. Jasper was full of good times; we had never seen this side of him before. I had never even heard him raise his voice before. Jasper was a good friend, and he was Edward's best friend. I was very grateful that he was there. I looked back at Elizabeth and she was red.

"You three get off my property before I call the police!" Elizabeth yelled at us, losing her façade of calm. When we just stood there and stared at her like the crazy person she was, she really lost it.

"Off!" she repeated, her whole body stiff with anger.

I don't know what happened, but I lost it. I stood there thinking of all the awful things they had done to Edward, to me... to us. How evil that woman in front of me was. Even if Edward had left me, I still hated her. I had never been disrespectful to an adult before but I didn't care.

"You know what! Call them! See if I care! I would love to see my dad's friends and then they can figure out what the hell _you_ did to Edward!" I yelled.

I stepped down the two steps to stand right in front of her. She took a step back, obviously shocked by my outburst.

"Screw that, we'll go to them ourselves," I seethed in her face then walked around her. I heard Alice and Jasper following me.

We got back into Jasper's car and headed to the police station. I pulled out my phone.

"Officer Dan, this is Bella... I need your help."

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**The next chapter will be up in a maximum of two weeks if not sooner :)  
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	25. Chapter 25 Searching for the Truth

**So it was only a week and a half... a little earlier than I said :) **

**HUGE thank you to Mamma4ever for making this readable and to Whatobsession for pre reading and dealing with me! LOL Love you ladies!**

**There are a few of you reviewers that request that Edward Sr. and Elizabeth get ran over. Well I couldn't do that, but I had Alice speak for you guys! LOL**

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Walking, holding hands

Talking, making plans

Touching my heart my soul

I wish this could be

a happy song

But my happiness disappeared

the moment you were gone

Tell me it's not happening

Say it's not as it seems

Tell me that I'm gonna wake up

It's just a bad dream

Please tell me that it's fiction

Tell me it's just a lie

Whatever you choose to tell me

Please say he didn't die

Missing You by Jem

**EPOV**

I had to get out of there, I knew that, but I didn't know where I was. I had woken up in a room with a cast on my ankle, I had no idea exactly how I had arrived there. I remember that my dad had caught up to me, him holding me down. A van came, two large men, a needle and then I was gone. It had been a few hours since I had woken up. I was in a room alone; there was only a bed, dresser and a bathroom. My ankle was broken, I assumed. I tried to escape, but it was no use.

Bella, I need to call Bella. That was the only thing I was thinking about. I begged and pleaded with everyone I came in contact with to just let me call her. I even asked for them to call her for me. I knew that she would be freaking out and that she would try to find me. I didn't want her to try and find me; that would mean her dealing with the fuckers that are my parents, and I didn't want her near them. When I got out of there, neither one of us would ever be near them again. I laid my head back on the bed closing my eyes but not sleeping.

**BPOV**

It had taken less than five minutes with the way Jasper was driving for us to pull into the police station. Alice was going off on how much she hated Edward's mom, and how she wanted her to get run over by a bus or a semi. Jasper was completely silent, which is _so_ not Jasper. He was still mad from the confrontation. His jaw was locked and his knuckles were turning white from griping the wheel of the car. I sat in the backseat and felt sick.

Elizabeth said that Edward didn't want me, that he left me. Just two days before he was asking me to move in with him, how could he leave me? I felt myself grow more and more nauseous, my mouth went dry and I could feel tears in my eyes. I decided to lock these questions away for later. Until I heard it from Edward's mouth, I had to believe it was a lie. It wouldn't be the first time his parents had lied. It did plant a seed of doubt in my head, but I owed Edward more than that.

Officer Dan's cruiser was pulling in right as we stepped out of the car. My breath caught in my throat seeing the uniform I always saw Charlie wear. I wondered how long so many things would trigger me.

"What's going on, Bella?" he asked walking toward us.

"It's Edward, I think his parents did something to him," I said, feeling the tears I was fighting leak out of my eyes.

"What do you mean 'did something'?" he asked. I had known Dan since I was little, and I knew him well. Dan cared, I knew he did, but he was a no-nonsense type of guy.

Between the three of us we told him everything.

"Well, you three go home, and I'll go have a look," he said. My heart clinched.

"No, please let me go with you," I begged. I knew Edward's mom would lie and exaggerate what happened. Even though I knew that Dan would believe us, I still wanted to be there. I wanted to know firsthand where Edward was, I wouldn't be able to stand the wait at home.

"Please," I said trying to sway him.

He stared at me long and hard, then finally relented.

"Fine. Just you… and you're staying in the car," he said, pointing his finger at me. I quickly agreed to his terms. I could tell he wasn't happy about our arrangement, but was grateful that he was letting me go with him.

"Call me as soon as you know what's going on," Alice begged.

"I will, promise," I said, giving her a quick hug.

I followed behind Dan; he walked over and opened the passenger side of his cruiser. I sat and he closed the door behind me. While Dan walked over to the driver's side, I watched Alice and Jasper drive away in Jasper's car. I hoped that Alice could calm him down; I'd never seen him so upset before.

"So tell me exactly why you think something's wrong?" he asked, once he pulled the car onto the street.

For the ten minute drive I explained everything I could to Dan. I finished my story in tears and told him about the scuff marks on their house, why I believed that Edward ran.

"Well, Bella, I wish Edward would have been more upfront with me the first time I met him, so maybe it wouldn't have gotten this bad."

I understood where he was coming from, but Edward's parents were controlling. They were controlling to the point of emotional abuse and his father was just flat out emotionally abusive. These things were just about impossible to prove. His parents had high power attorneys, and even if we did win, what would it have done? It would've put Edward in a foster home; I didn't think that would have been any better.

Even knowing all of this, my guilt was growing. Maybe I should've pushed Edward into asking for help. There was just so much going on that I was just trying to keep my head above water. At that point, my head was so far below the water it wasn't funny, I was drowning.

"I'm sorry, Dan, we just didn't know what to do," I explained. He looked over to me, and I saw a flash of sympathy in his eyes.

"I know, don't worry, we'll get this figured out, ok?" he said with a smile. I just nodded, not trusting my voice at that moment.

When we pulled into the drive, I could feel my breath coming up short and my chest tightening.

"You ok?" Dan asked, putting a hand on my shoulder. I nodded again, taking a deep breath.

"Ok, you stay put here, and I'll see what I can find out." With that, he climbed out of the car and started walking toward the house.

There was an extra car in the drive. A black SUV, in addition to Edward's car and Elizabeth's; it must be Edward Sr.'s. Dan had parked diagonally, as to block all three cars in.

Officer Dan rapped on the door three strong times then took a large step back, his hands rested on his belt. All of his motions while on the job mirrored Charlie's, and from behind, it was almost impossible to tell that it wasn't him - I wanted so badly for it to be him. The realization that I would never see him ever again hit me like a wrecking ball.

I wasn't able to wallow in the sadness for long, though, because the Masen's door flew open and a red-faced Edward Sr. stood in the doorway. My entire body went stiff, and I was terrified that this red-faced psycho would do something to harm Dan, and it would be my fault because I brought him there. I had to stop and remind myself that Dan was a trained professional and knew how to handle the situation.

In no time at all, Elizabeth and Edward Sr. were both standing on the porch, obviously refusing entry to Dan. I could hear their voices even though they were muffled. I rolled the window of the car down in hopes to hear what was being said.

"No, sir, we don't have to tell you where our son is," Elizabeth said defiantly.

"No, you don't. There have been reports of suspicious activity at your home and a minor has disappeared, never showing up for school. Now that is against the law." Dan threw back at her calmly, hands still resting on his belt.

"We've pulled him from that school," Edward's dad said with a smirk.

"So I assume if I were to go there, there would be a forwarding address for his new school?" Dan asked.

"With a warrant I'm sure there would be, otherwise, I'm sure the school won't give out confidential information," Edward Sr. fired back. Dan just nodded. I was sitting there dying; they had pulled him from school? He was really gone.

To my shock, Emmett's giant form appeared in the doorway.

"What's going on?" he asked.

"Hush Emmett, go back inside," Elizabeth snapped at him. He recoiled a little, but didn't go back inside. Quickly his eyes scanned the driveway and locked in on me sitting in the car. He was colored in shame and quickly looked down; at that point I knew that he knew where Edward was. Dan started speaking and I focused my attention back on him.

"I've had an anonymous report that Edward ran, that maybe he wasn't safe here," Dan stated coolly. Edward Sr. was getting more and more agitated. He was unable to stand still and was talking loudly and throwing his hands around.

"Anonymous report," Elizabeth scoffed. "You mean that little girl that is trying to start trouble because our son didn't want to be with her anymore and she can't handle it!" she shouted, pointing in my direction. Dan didn't even flinch or turn to face where she was pointing, he was the picture of calm.

"Mrs. Masen, you can accuse all you would like, but the report will remain anonymous," Dan stated, causing Elizabeth's eyes to roll into the back of her head and her arms to cross over her chest.

"Well, I want to report trespassing on our property by her and her two little friends!" she shouted.

"You're more than welcome to, but since they left as soon as they were asked, you're going to have a hard time getting anyone to listen to you," Dan said back.

"This can all be solved very easily, you can let me know where your son is so I can check up on him and make sure he is safe, or I can call Child Protective Services and a full investigation will be done," Dan said.

Edward Sr. blew up. "Yeah, well you can fuck off!"

I mean he lost it. He took an aggressive step toward Officer Dan and then shoved him - hard. Dan made no effort to block or get out of the way, I saw it coming, and so did he, so why did he let Edward's dad blow into him?

The next thing I saw shocked me. Before Edward Sr. could even step back Dan had him by his arm, he twisted it behind his back and had him forced face down on the hood of Edward's car. Edward Sr. shouted out in pain from his arm being twisted at such an unnatural angle. The force on his arm was shoving his face onto the dusty hood.

"You just assaulted a police officer, Mr. Masen," Dan said with a smile. _He knew all along_. He knew that Edward Sr. was losing his temper and he just let him. I could feel the biggest smile grow on my face.

Elizabeth was yelling, and Dan told her forcefully to sit on the steps of the porch. Emmett moved forward and pulled his mother back. Dan still had Edward's dad pinned and struggling on top of the car. One hand was keeping Edward Sr. down, and with the other he reached up to the walkie he had pinned to his uniform and requested the code that I knew meant he was asking for back up.

"You two stay on that porch and don't move, understand?" Dan shouted to Em and Elizabeth, who were on the porch. Elizabeth didn't answer, but Emmett's head was bobbing up and down, he looked like he was in complete shock.

"Edward Masen! You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be held against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford one, one will be appointed to you." He pulled his cuffs out from the back of his belt and slapped them on his wrist - my smile grew larger.

"Do you understand your rights?" he asked as he spun Edward Sr. around, pushing his back against the car.

"You better believe you'll hear from my attorney!" he screamed in Dan's face, spit flying from his mouth. Dan just nodded and started walking toward the cruiser, dragging a pissed off Edward Sr. with him.

"Bella, out," Dan said, and I quickly scrambled out of the passenger seat. Dan asked me to go and stand under a tree that was at the end of their driveway and I quickly complied. While he was trying to get Edward Sr. in the back of the car, Emmett made a move in my direction. Dan noticed immediately.

"Back on the porch!" Dan yelled, his hand resting on his handgun that was secured to his belt. I knew that's how they're trained as officers - to be prepared - that he would never pull his gun on Emmett for any reason, but I still almost screamed out for him to stop. There were three people and one officer; Dan didn't know these people and he was a good cop, he knew what he was doing. Emmett stopped dead in his tracks and moved back on the porch.

My heart was pounding so fast. I couldn't believe the turn everything had taken. I still had no idea where Edward was, but seeing his dad in the back of a police car made this trip worth it. I was running over everything that had just happened, and all the stories that Edward told me of how his dad treated him, and back even further to all the comments Emmett used to make about his parents. I hated that man, I hated him so much. He had hurt Edward more than Edward would ever admit, and I wished so badly that Edward was here to see the fucker sitting alone in the back of a police car - Edward deserved to see that.

By the time Dan had Edward's dad in the back of the car, Elizabeth was crying and another cruiser was pulling in, lights on, attracting the attention of anyone that was nearby. _Good,_ I thought, _I hope it attracts a ton of attention and not only embarrasses the hell out of Elizabeth but also puts pressure on them to tell the truth. _

Dan quickly put me in the other cruiser's passenger seat. I recognized the officer immediately as another one of my dad's good friends from the force. I couldn't believe all this had happened, adrenaline was cursing though my veins and I couldn't keep my leg from bouncing.

The two officers walked back up to the porch to face Emmett and Elizabeth. I heard Dan let Edward's mother know that she would be receiving a visit from Child Protective Services very soon, and he also gave her directions as to how she could bail her husband out of jail.

"I'm taking this one down; take her home, will ya?" Dan asked the other officer.

"Sure," he said, walking to the driver's side of his cruiser. Dan walked up and leaned into the open window.

"Stay home, do not come back here, understand?" I quickly promised him I would never come back.

"I'll let you know something as soon as I do. No more detective, Bella. I'm going to pay a visit to your mom and fill her in as well," he said with a smile, then walked to his own car. I really didn't want to burden my mom, but Dan was right. Things had gotten so out of hand and it was time that she knew. Dan's car pulled out before we did and watching Edward's dad being driven away was the highlight of my day.

**~B*E~**

As soon as the officer dropped me off, I called Alice and Jasper. They came right over. I told them everything that happened and they were both pissed at me for not thinking to take a picture of Edward's dad being arrested. I laughed them off, but couldn't deny that I wished I had thought of it as well.

"So what's the next step?" Jasper asked.

"I honestly don't know. I promised Dan I wouldn't do any more investigating on my own, but I can't stand not knowing where he is or if he's ok," I said. I knew that I wouldn't be sleeping that night.

I told them about how odd Em's behavior was.

"Fuck that! I say we go over and I beat the information out of him," Jasper said, jumping up. Alice was trying to calm him down as my phone started to ring. I quickly grabbed it, in hopes that it would be Edward. It wasn't, however I was shocked at who it _was_. It was a number that I hadn't seen on my phone for over a year.

"Alice, Jasper… it's Emmett!" I shouted.

"Answer it!" Alice shouted back. I hesitated. I was scared of what he was going to say.

"Hello."

"Bella, I'm so glad you answered."

"What do you want, Emmett?" I was in no mood to hear his bullshit, either he had information for me or not; it wasn't a time for him to try to get into my good graces again.

"Can you come over?" he asked.

"Yeah… that's a big hell no. You're dad just got sent to jail and your mom probably wants to kill me. No, I don't think I'll come over," I said sarcastically.

"She's not home; she went to get my dad. Please come over," he begged.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because I feel like shit. After my parents found out about Edward quitting football and then him taking his car, they cornered me. They forced me to tell them everything Edward had done," he admitted.

"Forced you?" I asked incredulously. "Seriously Emmett, you do everything you can to hurt Edward, you did this on purpose," I accused. I heard him growl out frustration into the phone.

"I didn't mean to! They were threatening me and, fuck! What do want me to say, Bella? I'm a pussy? Is that what you want to hear? Fine then, I'm a pussy! My parents control the shit out of me, so I told them. I feel like shit for it." He calmed down after his outburst.

"Listen, I'm trying to make this right, ok? I don't want my brother to hate me forever. I know where he is, just come over." I was so tempted, but I didn't trust Emmett. Also, I knew that Edward and Officer Dan would both be pissed if I went back to that house.

"No, you come over here. If I come back there, it will only be with Officer Dan," I said. He sighed loudly into the phone.

"You owe me, Emmett." It was a low blow, but I didn't care, I wanted to know where Edward was.

"Fine, I'll be there in ten. I don't want to deal with Jasper or Alice's shit though," he said, and then hung up before I could agree to his terms.

"What an ass!" I said closing my phone.

"What'd he say?" Jasper asked. I told them what Emmett said, and how I was going to go outside and meet with him on my own. Jasper didn't like it.

"Fuck that! Edward would kill me if I let you go out and meet that piece of shit on your own," he said, loudly. I wasn't used to this side of Jasper; I wished he'd calm down.

"I want to know where Edward is. Emmett isn't going to hurt me. You and Alice can watch through the window if you want, but I'm going out there to talk to him - alone. We don't need any more fights or drama," I said. Reluctantly, they both agreed with me.

In no time at all, Emmett's jeep was pulling up and he stepped out. I watched him through the window, he looked exhausted and like he'd been crying. His hands were in his pockets and his shoulders sagged, and with each step he made, he looked like he was aging before my eyes. For a second I felt bad for him - only for a second. He was raised by those psychos, too, but he was nineteen now, why didn't he leave? I reminded myself that Edward was raised by the same people and yet he didn't make the horrible choices that Emmett had, there was no excuse.

After warning Jasper one more time to cool it and not do anything stupid, I walked outside.

"Hey," Emmett said, his voice thick with emotion. I looked at my old best friend and wondered how he got like that. So mean and full of hate, how he could turn on his best friend and brother. Again, I felt bad for him. It was obvious that he was in pain.

"Where is he, Emmett?" I asked, not bothering with pleasantries, staying as cold as I could.

"I just want you to know that I didn't want to tell them anything and I wish I hadn't." he said. "There are so many things I wish I hadn't done," he added under his breath. "I... thought... I thought I had feelings for you, before... before," he rambled, leaning against the railing of our little porch; it squeaked, trying to hold his weight. He looked up at me and continued. "I realize now that I was just jealous of Edward all along, I can tell that it's not like that for Edward. He really loves you. I'm just so sorry," he said quietly, and then looked down.

I felt tears burn my eyes. I knew all along that Emmett never had any real feelings for me, and the fact that he let his jealousy of his brother ruin our friendship hurt.

"Uh, I'm leaving. I've realized how fucked up my parents really are and I'm not going to try and get their... approval or... whatever anymore, so..." he trailed off.

I didn't respond, I just stared at him, impatiently, only wanting to know where Edward was.

"My parents wouldn't tell me where they took him, but I found this in my dad's desk," he said, passing me a packet of papers.

"The address and what you need is in there," he added. I turned to walk inside, anxious to see what information the packet held for me.

"Bella," Emmett said, urgently. I turned to face him.

"Please tell Edward that I told you where he was... that I didn't mean to tell them, that I'm sorry." He truly looked in pain.

"That's something you're gonna have to say yourself, Emmett," I said as I walked into the house, shutting the door behind me.

Alice rushed over to me as I sat on the couch and ripped the packet open. We both stared in shock at the paper sitting on the couch between us, revealing the truth of where Edward was at. I felt a tear roll down and off my nose, my hands were shaking.

"I'm going there... now."

* * *

**My dad was a cop, I was raised watching the show "cops". As sad as it is, I know the Miranda Rights by memory LOL  
I enjoyed having Edward Sr. arrested! **

**Ok, next chapter will be EPOV! **

**I am going camping in La Push Saturday. Hence why this is out early, incase I get eaten by a bear... or bugs *shudders* Or drown in the rain that I just saw we'd be having. At least you all can say "Well, at least she updated"  
****Yeah, i guess you can tell, I am not much of a camper. We got all the stuff for our wedding two years ago, and every single item is still in the box, so hubs says it's time *sigh***

** Let me know what you think! I'll update as soon as I can :) **


	26. Chapter 26 You Have to Believe Me

**Hey Everybody! I am so sorry this took so long, writers block is a bitch! **

**I know this is a little short but I already have the next chapter going, it will be out in two weeks tops! Promise! **

**HUGE Thank you to everyone who reads and those who reviewed the last chapter. I'm so sorry if I couldn't respond but loved reading every one!**

**Mamma4ever and Whatobsession17 Thank you so much for putting so much time in my little story**

* * *

**As life gets longer, awful feels softer,**

**and it feels pretty soft to me.**

**And if it takes shit to make bliss,**

**well I feel pretty blissfully.**

**If life's not beautiful without the pain,**

**well I'd just rather never ever even see beauty again.**

**The View by Modest Mouse**

**BPOV**

"I can't give that information out," The woman at the front desk repeated again.

"I know he's here. I want to see him," I demanded as politely as I could manage. She let out a large sigh and told us to wait where we were.

We had been asking this woman at the front desk to see Edward for the past thirty minutes. I was surprised she hadn't called security on us for annoying the hell out of her.

"Bella, you need to accept the fact that you probably won't get to see or talk to him," Officer Dan said softly.

Mom and Dan had insisted on coming with me when I found out where Edward's parents had sent him. Even though Alice and Jasper wanted to come, we felt it would be better if they stayed behind. I wanted to look as mature as possible. I was afraid if a bunch of high schoolers showed up, no one would take us seriously. I wasn't stupid though. I had done my research.

I knew if the Doctor didn't think the patient being held there needed the level of work the Center offered, they were instructed to discharge them. I'd done my research on the Vultori Center and I knew Edward didn't belong there. The Vultori Center was a place regarded highly in the community. It was known for it's amazing cases of rehabilitation.

The Vultori Center treated children, mostly teens, with all different disorders. Eating disorders, drug abuse, depression and suicide, then the last item listed, in detail, on their website - anger disorders. I had assumed that was exactly the thing they admitted Edward for. The website explained the symptoms one would have with sever anger management problems, and Edward did not fit the bill. I'm sure his parents exaggerated enough for them to agree to have him stay.

I was trying to think of anything else that may help my case for Edward when a man in a white coat walked into the lobby, he was obviously a doctor.

"Good afternoon, I'm Carlisle Cullen." We all shook his hand.

"Would you mind taking this conversation into my office?"

He seemed pleasant enough but I couldn't tell if it was because he was a nice guy, or if it was because he didn't want us making a scene in the lobby of the Center. At that point, it didn't matter to me. I would have done anything to make sure Edward was ok.

We all walked into his office and sat down. Mom and Dan on the nice leather couch to the side of his desk, and I sat in the chair across from it. I thought about how my dad would handle that meeting, if he were there, that's how I planned to conduct myself. My normal timid, non confident self was gone - I meant business.

"So, I've been told you have some insistent questions?"

"Yes, sir." I figured I would start polite. Sucking up was not beneath me.

"I know for a fact that Edward Masen is a patient here. I have studied all of your policies and can prove that he doesn't belong here." Even though my voice wavered, I hoped I still sounded confident.

"Well, it's against patient confidentiality for me to release any information about a patient. Including confirming whether or not someone _is _a patient. This isn't court though Mrs..."

"Swan. Bella, please."

"Bella. I appreciate how devoted you are, but I'm not sure what you feel your proof will do."

He said it kindly, but it still burned.

"Dr. Cullen, I've done my research. I know your policies. I have proof that it would be unethical for you to hold Edward Masen here."

His eyebrows raised. I took it as a sign to start pulling out what I brought. He didn't stop me.

"This is officer Dan, he can tell you about one incident that happened a few months ago." Dan sat up a little on the couch.

"I'm here off duty but have witnessed some things that I feel should be brought to the attention of whomever is providing medical care."

Dan didn't want to speak about what had happened. He'll never know how grateful I was that he changed his mind. For the next few minutes Dan told the doctor everything he had witnessed. From the night his parents called the police on him for running away, up until the moment he arrested Edward's dad.

Doctor Cullen was very professional and gave nothing away with his expressions on what he was thinking. He nodded his head when necessary and gave his condolences to my mother and me when he learned about Charlie. Never once did he give anything away about Edward. I didn't even know if this man knew Edward - it was a big hospital.

After Dan was finished, Mom told her side of everything and spoke for what her and my dad had witnessed. Then, I pulled out the letters from Alice, Jasper, Jake and Charlotte from the hospital and Billy, Edward's old boss. They all stated the horrid behavior they had seen from Edward's family. The letters also made a point to say how great Edward was.

Alice and Jasper said what a good friend he was. Charlotte and Jake spoke about how they saw him act at the hospital. How mature he was and what a great support he was. Billy wrote a long letter, stating how Edward was one of his best employees and the only time his work was ever interfered with was when his parents involved themselves.

I really believed I had enough information to prove our point. I knew they wouldn't send Edward on his way. I wasn't naive. I just hoped it was enough to put a seed of doubt into his head. I knew Edward's parents could put on a good show and I wanted to make sure it was known that's all it was - a show.

**EPOV**

Two weeks. It had been two long, miserable weeks I'd been stuck there. I stared out the sealed window of my room, at nothing. I had nothing to look at except a parking lot. I would watch people come and go, mostly staff, while I was trapped with no escape. I thought of a million ways to get out, to run, but there was no use. I pulled out my book and continued to work on my homework from school. They may have sent me there but I was determined to graduate on time still.

My parents had sent me there and I would be forced to stay until either my parents released me, the doctor released me, or until I turned eighteen and I could release myself. I looked at the sign that hung in the entryway, and scowled; "Volturi Center".

It was a place where parents could dump their kids on other people. It was a place of rehabilitation. There were kids there who tried to commit suicide, had eating disorders, kids who were unmanageable, or had anger problems - like me. Well, that's what my parents had told the people there.

My parents had said I was hostile, volatile - dangerous. I had been forced to go to daily anger management classes, daily group therapy and daily one-on-one counseling with a doctor. My doctor was Doctor Cullen; my only hope of getting out of there early. Otherwise, my birthday was almost two months away.

When I had met him on the first day, sadly, I lived up to my parents' description. I was freaked out, pissed off, and had no idea where I was. I just reacted. I had been sitting in my room by the window on the first night there, my ankle in a cast. A man in a white coat walked into the room.

"_Hello Edward, my name is Dr. Cullen. Would it be all right if we talked for a second?" _

"_Are you going to answer my goddamn questions? 'Cause no one else is," I stated coolly, narrowing my eyes. _

"_I'm not sure who else you have spoken with, but I'd be happy to answer any questions you have. I'm sure this is all very confusing for you." _

He had stayed in my room for over an hour answering all my questions. Never getting frustrated or angry with me. By the end of the hour, I had decided that Dr. Cullen was alright, and I really needed to play my cards right so he would believe me and see how crazy my parents were.

The lies he had read off my chart my parents had told him were unreal. The evidence against me didn't look good. My mom had even taken pictures of Emmett after I beat the shit out of him. I had to just let my actions show Dr. Cullen who I really was, and pray it would be enough to get out of there.

I looked at the clock. By then I knew the schedule. I knew in ten minutes I would be forced downstairs to 'mingle' with the other residences. I looked down at the black sweats and blue t-shirt I was forced to wear and I wanted to puke - I shouldn't have been there.

Before someone came in and softly – patronizingly – tried to talk me into going downstairs, I chose to just take myself down. I grabbed my crutches and headed out of my bare room. Walking down the halls, I kept my head down, making an effort to not look at anyone.

When I made it to the main room, I sat on a couch and radiated the 'fuck off' vibe. It worked. No one tried to talk to me. I looked around at what had been my home for the past two weeks. I wondered what it was costing my parents to keep me there - I hoped it was a whole fucking lot.

I sat and thought about the past two weeks. I tried to think of anything that would help me get out.

"_Edward, you say your parents are exaggerating, but what about this?" Carlisle – as he said to call him – asked holding up the picture of Emmett with a split lip. I said nothing in response. _

"_Did you do this to your brother?" _

"_Yes." There was no point in lying. _

"_That doesn't seem like an exaggeration to me," he said, placing the picture back in the folder._

"_Did she say why that happened?"_

"_Does it matter?" he threw back. _

_Agitated, I shifted positions on the couch. Everything looked so bad. No, to most people it was never ok to beat the shit out of someone for any reason, but I'd do it again in a heartbeat. _

"_I think so," I said. _

"_Ok, then. Why did you do this to your brother?" I wanted to say, 'because he's an asshole,' but stopped myself, because I needed to think before I spoke in order to get the hell out of that place. _

"_I did it... because he did something horrible to someone I love." _

"_Bella?" _

_Carlisle had figured out by our second session that Bella was the only person I cared about, because for the first session I did nothing but demand that either they let me call her, or that someone else did. After three hours of my demanding, he finally sent me back to my room. That night, I decided to play the game, answer the questions, and get Cullen on my side. It was my only chance of getting out. _

"_Yes, Bella." It hurt to even say her name. I knew she would be freaking out. I wondered if she knew where I was yet. _

"_What would cause you to become so angry, Edward?" _

"_She was... violated, because of him." I didn't know how to say it. _

"_I can understand why that would make you angry. Can you elaborate on it at all, though?" _

_There was nothing I could do but to explain the entire situation from beginning to end. I started with the parking lot when I first saw Bella. I told him about Bella's dad's illness, about the dance, about the confrontations between Bella and Emmett that finally led up to Emmett's lies causing Bella to be stripped searched at her school, which lead to her having to switch schools. _

"_I can understand why'd you be so angry. I can't say I wouldn't be as well, but do you believe you handled it right?" _

"_I had no other choice," I told him with a sigh._

"_Edward, there is always another choice. You could've spoken to the school, Bella's parents, your parents. Do you really think physically harming your brother was the best way to handle the situation?" _

_I explained to him how we did exactly that. Also, how Bella's parents had contacted my own as well. Carlisle looked shocked when I explained everything we did and how my parents did nothing to mediate the situation. He quickly morphed his expression back into his professional mask._

"_I understand why you felt that was your only option, but you need to learn other ways to handle your anger." _

_Good enough for me. At least he said he understood. _

Every session we had, he would have another example from my parents of how I was out of control, and every time I would explain. Most times it would end with him saying he understood where I was coming from.

"_There's a police report here," he said, sliding it my way. I didn't need to look at it. I already knew what it said. I was in my eighth session with Cullen. I knew how it would go._

"_You don't want to read it?" he asked. I shrugged and glanced over it. _

"_Your dad felt he needed to call the police because he was worried about his safety." I laughed and once again told him my side of the story. _

"_I have to say, Edward, your story is always much different than your parents'. Why do you think that is?" That was an easy question._

"_Because they're lying." I sounded like a child. _

"_Why would they do that?" He asked me as if I were a child._

_I rolled my eyes and took a deep breath. There was one person that could clear it all up, but I wasn't sure if I should say. I didn't want to get him in trouble. _

"_What did the cops say?" _

"_They couldn't find you," Carlisle said, somewhat exasperated with me. _

"_It's not true, though, who's the officer on the report?" I already knew it was Dan and then Carlisle confirmed it. _

"_Call him, see what he says," I said. _

_That way I never accused Dan of anything, if he wanted to offer up the truth he could, and I hoped he did._

_I explained my mom's control issues and my dad's - well, all of his issues. Explained how he never wanted me. I didn't sound whiney, just stating the facts. _

"_Does that bother you?" _

"_What?" I asked. _

"_That you feel your dad never wanted you?"_

_I laughed. _

"_Feel? No, I don't feel, it's the way it is. He's not shy about it. And no, it doesn't bother me at all. I don't want him either." _

_Carlisle looked up from his notes, surprised. _

_The conversation continued. Carlisle said he'd like to speak with my parents again. _

"_In the end, it doesn't matter who's wrong or right. You guys aren't living in the same reality; that's what worries me." _

_Me too, doc. _

After my sessions with Dr. Cullen, I would go to anger management. People with real problems would share their stories, and I would feel even more out of place. I didn't belong there.

"_... so I punched him." _

"_Because this person accidentally bumped into your shoulder?" the counselor clarified. _

"_He touched me first!" _

_Ok, so back to first grade rules then. The counselor took that time to teach us a lesson on when it was best to walk away. It took everything in me to not stand up and walk away from that stupid class._

Day in and day out, that was how my existence had been. Nothing changed, nothing was different. The same three meetings with the same three meals, every damn day.

Until one day when Carlisle was acting 'off' in a session.

"_You've been doing well, Edward. I don't want what I'm about to say derail your progress." _

_My heart rate increased, my palms were sweating. _

"_What?" I asked._

"_A young woman came in; she was demanding to see you." _

_Bella. I couldn't believe she had been there. She had been there, already left, and I never knew. I could feel myself tensing. I was sitting on the edge of the couch; spit it out Doc!_

"_She came with her mother and a police officer; the one from the report. He came as a civilian, not in uniform. She was insistent on seeing you. Of course we couldn't allow that, but she and the officer seem to corroborate your story." _

_Is that it? Was he trying to torture me?_

"_She had statements from various people – she would make a great lawyer," he said, with a laugh._

"_I explained this wasn't court, no evidence was needed. She's a smart girl, Edward. She had already looked into our policies. She saw the same thing you did. If the doctor feels the patient does not need this level of services, then it is unethical to continue to treat the patient in the Volturi Center." _

_What was he saying? Was he going to let me go? _

"_Your brother, Emmett, he is on the approved visiting list -"_

"_I don't want to see him," I cut Carlisle off. _

"_I figured. Anyway," he said, annoyed with my interruption. "He called and spoke with me. He, too, has concerns with why your parents chose to place you here." _

_Emmett did that? I'm sure the shock on my face was evident. _

"_What are you saying?" I asked quietly. _

"_Don't get your hopes up, Edward. I've never had a patient with so much conflicting information, that's all I'm saying. I've spoken with your parents many times, but I feel it's time to have them come here. I want to speak with them and you together. See if we can't find some common ground." _

_If my hopes were up, they weren't anymore. My parents were the master manipulators, I didn't stand a chance. _

At two weeks, the situation felt hopeless. At times I would think Carlisle was on my side but I could never be sure; he always kept his professional mask on. Not that day, though. No, that day he would have to pick a side. That day, my parents were coming. They would be there within the hour.

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**Ok so the big showdown is in the next chapter!  
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	27. Chapter 27 Uprising

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**They will not force us**

**They will stop degrading us**

**They will not control us**

**We will be victorious, so come on**

**Uprising by Muse**

**EPOV**

They were there. I hadn't seen them yet, but just knowing they were there made every hair stand on end and every nerve felt like it was on fire. Tense. My entire body was tense. Jaw locked, hands in fists, muscles tight. I was going to have to face them soon, and all I really wanted to do was freak the fuck out on them. Tell them how much I hated them. Punch my dad in his stupid face and tell my mother to fuck off once and for all. I couldn't do that though. If I did that, it would prove I needed to be there and make me look like an ass. My plan was to go in there and be as quiet as possible. The more I spoke the angrier I would get. I knew this.

I planned to walk into that room, sit down and behave the best I could. I felt that even without him saying it, Dr. Cullen was on my side. I had to trust that our time together was enough for him to back me up - I hoped. If I went in there and was blindsided - if Carlisle took my parents' side, I planned to let shit hit the fan. I would have nothing to lose. If I was truly stuck there until May, the people around me would suffer right along with me.

I was starting to get sick to my stomach. I just wanted to get in there and be done with it. I wanted to know what my future held.

"Edward." I looked up to see a nurse I grew to know during my stay there. She was an older lady with a sweet disposition, but she was outspoken. She made it clear she didn't believe I deserved to be there.

"They're ready for you in there." She walked my crutches over to me. I stood and started what felt like a death march toward Dr. Cullen's office.

"Edward." I craned my neck to see her. "Behave in there. I don't want to see you back here," she said with a wink. I laughed at her and continued on my path.

I used the end of my crutch to knock on the door when I reached Dr. Cullen's office. My stomach was in knots. I wasn't sure what I would be facing.

The door was opened by Dr. Cullen. I saw my parents sitting on the couch, my body instantly stiffening just by their presence.

"Hello, Edward. Go ahead and have a seat," Dr. Cullen said with a tight smile, pointing to the empty chair right next to his desk; far away from my parents.

I didn't want my back to them, I didn't trust them. I turned and hobbled to the chair anyway. As Carlisle walked back behind his desk, my mom took the opportunity to be fake – exactly what I would expect from her.

"Oh Edward, we've missed you. How is your ankle honey?" A fake plastic smile on her face, tissues in her hands. _Give me a break._

I rolled my eyes, but didn't answer. Instead I turned to Dr. Cullen, giving him a look that said, "Let's get this over with."

"Well, Edward, as you know, your parents and I have been talking for a while now. I wanted to bring you in and see if we couldn't work some of these... disagreements out."

Was it just me or did Cullen look drained from his session with my parents? He did, he looked wiped.

"I've already explained this a _few_ times to your parents, but I will repeat it again since you've joined us. The Volturi Center is _not _a place of punishment. This is a center for teens who really need help - _medical help_ - to lead successful lives. Why do you think you're here Edward?"

"Punishment, there's no doubt."

"Now, that's just not true, Edward!" Mom spoke up, loudly.

I sat back and shut my mouth, knowing I wouldn't get another word in until she felt like she had said everything she wanted to say.

Dr. Cullen gently raised a hand to my mom, silently asking her to shut up.

"Why do you feel that way, Edward?"

"Because I didn't do anything to deserve this." My dad scoffed loudly from the couch.

He looked uncomfortable. Arms crossed, body tense. Obviously my mom had made him come.

"Is there something you wanted to say Mr. Masen?" Dr. Cullen asked.

"Of course he did something to deserve this!" he exclaimed. "The kid's a complete fuck- up!" Not yelling, but loud.

"I'll have to disagree with you and ask you to not speak that way in _my_ office about one of _my_ patients," Dr. Cullen stated coolly.

Another scoff came from my dad. Mom's hand slid across the couch and rested on Dad's hand; a warning.

"What is it Edward has done to make you believe he needs medical-level help for his anger?"

_There you go, Cullen, say the same thing in a different way. Obviously they were too stupid to get it the first time. _

"Oh, Dr. Cullen, the list is miles long."

Fake tears, they weren't coming out but she was trying her hardest to produce them.

"And on that list?" His voice sounded a little exhausted.

Dr. Cullen was a patient man, but even he could only take so much.

"Let's see... he's a very angry boy. He lashes out for no reason at all, hits people-"

"People?" Cullen interrupted before I had a chance to.

"Well, yes, you have the pictures. Emmett, his brother."

"While I never condone physical violence of any kind, it's not unusual for two brothers to come to blows once in a while. I've gone over other techniques with Edward on how to deal with situations other than using violence, when he's left with no parental help. Were there any other forms of physical violence?"

If I didn't know my own story, I would never have caught onto the insults he was putting into his professional opinion.

I could almost see the smoke coming out of her ears, she was pissed. She sat and fumbled, but couldn't come up with anything.

"There will be." She sounded so confident; it even had me curious.

"Why do you say that?" Dr. Cullen asked. I couldn't tell if he really cared to hear the answer or not.

"Because he quit football! He has nowhere to get his angry energy out now. He needed that! In football he could hit people and it was ok."

My god, was she serious? I was surprised no one had tried to commit her yet. I rolled my eyes and laid my head in my hands, not being able to hold in the laughter.

"You really fear he will start to become violent at random intervals just because he isn't getting enough energy out?" Even Dr. Cullen was holding back a smile.

"I most certainly do."

She sounded like she really believed what she said.

"Well, I've worked with Edward daily. I've pushed his buttons, dug into his personal life, done things that would set most people off. He's reacted very rationally in every situation. I can, with great confidence, say I have no worries about Edward being violent at random intervals." _Go Dr. Cullen!_

Another huff from Mother Dearest.

"His medication… he refused to take it. I found out he was spitting it out." A triumphant smiles spread across her face.

She had a valid point, I _was_ spitting them out.

"Well, about the pills… I didn't agree with the prescription. I was surprised an ADD medication would be given to Edward. I've spoken to the doctor who prescribed it. He's never had a proper session with Edward and therefor has no business proscribing medications. If I were you Mr. and Mrs. Masen, I would be more careful with the doctors I chose."

My dad's eyes were burning then, he was about to lose it.

"I think that's a great suggestion, doc. Where did you say _your_ medical degree was from?" he asked snidely.

Dr. Cullen, unlike my father, was an adult. He responded politely and moved on to the next topic.

The session continued and I didn't have to say a damn word. Cullen was on my side and was doing a great job.

"I have reason to believe he's sexually active."

Carlisle looked at me. I shrugged. What else could I do?

"What makes you think that Mrs. Masen?"

If she said one bad thing about Bella, I was gonna fly out of that chair.

"Well, on the phone he had - the one he snuck into our home against our wishes, mind you.- I found some... suggestive text messages."

"Well, once again, not that I condone promiscuity, but Edward is less than two months shy of eighteen, this would not be unusual behavior for a young man his age. He's expressed to me he's in a long-term, serious relationship. Safety is very important. Are you being safe, Edward?"

_Really doc? Right in front of my parents_?

I decided to piss them off a little.

"Very safe." A smirk was on my face. I swear I could see the color in my mom's face change from red to blood red.

"He's very irresponsible. He has no balance in his life. All he wants to do is hang out with that little girlfriend of his."

"Those would be serious concerns. Can you give examples so we can understand what behavior has you worried?"

"Well quitting football. That was a commitment-"

I couldn't take it, I cut her off. "No, it wasn't! I had committed to complete the season and I completed the season. You both wanted me to play in college. I _don't _want to so stopped continuing my training. It was a choice I made, for _my_ future."

"A choice you had no right to make!" Dad was shouting then.

"Why the fuck not! It's my life and I don't want to play in college!"

By then, it was a shouting match. It escalated a little more before Carlisle stepped in. For a minute we both sat in our chairs fuming. When the tension in the room lowered to a reasonable level, Carlisle addressed the football situation.

"Unfortunately, we have no say in what our children do after the age of eighteen. We can raise them the best we can and hope they will make good choices to make us proud, but in the end they are _their _choices to make."

Not the way I would have said, 'stay the fuck out of my life', but ok.

"He could never make me proud." _Hate_, if there was such a tone he had found it.

"I'm sorry you feel that way, Mr. Masen. I would be very proud if my son grew into a young man like Edward."

Wow, I was a little surprised by that. I didn't even know he had a kid.

"You want your kid to be a quitter, a failure, a disrespectful little punk?" My dad asked.

Mom let out a large sigh, covering her face with one hand and shook her head. Even though mom was controlling beyond anything considered normal, she'd never been hateful. She'd never liked when dad was, not that she did much to stop it.

"No, I can't say I would want that. However, I _would_ want him to carry some of the same values Edward seems to carry. Respectful, goal-oriented, smart, great work ethic, and, from what I'm seeing, amazing survival skills."

Both parental heads whipped in the doctor's direction.

"You make it sound like we don't love our son, Dr. Cullen. We do… very much, but obviously his manipulation skills have done quite a number on you."

"Mrs. Masen, I will agree. I feel I've been manipulated, but not by Edward."

"This is bullshit!" Dad exclaimed as he stormed out of the office, slamming the door.

Mom stood, ready to start her rant, but Dr. Cullen spoke up before she could. "Edward, could you wait outside please?"

There would be no argument from me. I grabbed my crutches and walked out the door. There was a bench right outside his office that I parked myself on. Dad was nowhere in sight. I'm not sure if Cullen knew or not, but I could hear every word coming from the office.

"Mrs. Masen, please sit down. This isn't the time or a place for a fight."

I'd never heard Cullen sound so damn stern.

"I was under the impression you believed your child truly needed help."

"We do, he needs serious help!" Mom's voice screeched.

Thank God the door muffled some of the annoying-ness.

"Not the kind of help the Volturi Center offers. I agree, Edward could use counseling and he could learn some anger management in that counseling. He does _not_, however, need the level of care we offer here."

There was no verbal reaction from my mom but Carlisle obviously felt the need to continue.

"You two are acting like this is bad news, it isn't. I'm telling you that you have raised a wonderful son. I believe the problem only lies between the three of you. You don't mesh."

_Understatement of the year_.

"I have to say, Dr. Cullen, I am very insulted at what your insinuating." Mom's voice was hard and cold.

"What is it you believe I'm insinuating?" He truly sounded curious.

"That Ed and I have done wrong by Edward, that we aren't good parents."

Now I could hear real tears in her voice. I'd never seen my mom cry, and it actually made me feel a little bad; not much, but a little.

"What I'm saying is that, yes, there are obviously problems but no, I don't see them being Edward's fault. It's obvious to me, Mrs. Masen, you have some extreme control issues and your husband has obvious anger issues. There are big problems, but no, it wasn't fair for you to place them all on Edward's shoulders. Kids are products of their environment, and I'm afraid it doesn't sound like a healthy one you have going on right now."

I was expecting to hear yelling from my mom, but I didn't. She was completely silent.

"I... I've never thought of it like that. Edward has always been more... wild, more difficult. My husband was the only one he was scared of when-"

"See? Right there. Edward should respect his father, not fear him. You have turned every single incident with Edward into a war; it doesn't need to be that way. You pick your battles - you pick every single one Mrs. Masen, it's not healthy."

I sat a little shocked at how frank Dr. Cullen was being with my mom. I was even more shocked at how my mom seemed to be taking it all in and not arguing. There was silence for a long time then I heard my mom's voice. There was no mistake this time, she was crying.

"What do I do? I don't want to lose him."

"I have to say in this situation, after speaking to all three of you, Edward has the healthiest outlook on the situation. If you don't change things dramatically, and fast, you will lose him forever. He's almost eighteen. He could disappear and never contact you again, and at this point, I can't say I'd do any differently."

I could hear my mom crying then, and I won't lie and say it didn't hurt. My dad was an asshole and I don't think he'd care if I disappeared, but my mom would.

"I'm not saying this to make you cry or to hurt you, but I think you need to hear the truth. If you have any hope – any hope at all – at saving your relationship with your son, you have to stop controlling him and take responsibility for your part in this situation."

"I've never... no one... yes, I'm willing to do that. I don't want to lose Edward. Emmett, our other son, he's already left. Ed though, he won't... I don't think..." She trailed off; I could only hear soft cries after that.

"Well, we can't force something on other people. If your husband is unwilling to get healthy, that's his choice. If you're willing and Edward's willing, I say we work on you two for now." Carlisle suggested.

I assumed my mom agreed because next thing I knew the office door was opened and Carlisle stepped out into the hall.

"You heard every word didn't you?" he asked, rolling his eyes.

I nodded. He raised his hand motioning me inside the office. Grabbing my crutches, I hobbled behind him. When I sat down, I looked over at my mom. She wouldn't look me in the eye.

Her makeup was smeared as black tears ran down her cheeks. The strongest feeling running through me was shock. Angry, sad, tired, no matter what my mom was feeling, she always wore the same mask. Seeing her so open, so raw, really surprised me. Taking a deep breath and handing my mom a tissue, Carlisle finally spoke up.

"Ok, we need to come to some agreements here. Like I said before, the Volturi Center is not a detention center, it is not a location for punishment. With that being said, Edward, I don't believe you need the level of care we offer here."

"Ed... he, uh, he already looked into other centers just in case."

"Well, Mrs. Masen, I will gladly send my professional opinion out to any center, advising them not to accept Edward. If you allow your husband to send him to boot camp or something else crazy like that... well then, that's on you." Carlisle was all business.

She nodded, but didn't look up. I had never seen my mom act like anything that resembled being timid. I couldn't even rejoice over what Carlisle was saying because I was so shocked.

"Now, Edward will be discharged today. We need to discuss where he will be staying for the next month and a half until he turns eighteen."

This made my mom look up.

"With me, of course."

"I don't know if I'm comfortable with that situation. Is there anyone else he could stay with?"

"Bella," I said quietly.

"I am in no way ok with that," my mom said. Her voice came out with less strength than it usually carried. I rolled my eyes.

"I agree with your mother on this one. I don't think it's appropriate for you to stay with your girlfriend. I don't believe her mother would be ok with it either."

He was right; Renee wouldn't be ok with it. Would she let me crash on her couch a couple nights? Yes. Help me pay for a place, or help me find a place? Yes. Let me just shack up at their house with Bella? No. Renee was more responsible than that.

"Jasper's mom said I could stay there after I turned eighteen," I offered.

I knew his mom really didn't want to deal with my parents at all, so I was sure she wouldn't want to have me a day before my birthday.

"Mrs. Masen… any family? Close friends?"

She shook her head no. No, there was no one because my family had isolated themselves.

"Well there's always the foster care system, but I'm afraid you'd be in a group home until you were eighteen."

That did not sound like a good time to me.

Dr. Cullen let out a large sigh.

"Well, there's no other choice than a group home. Your mom is willing to add herself to the treatments I'm going to have you continue, but with your father so unwilling and angry, I'm not comfortable with you going home."

"He'll be on a business trip the rest of the month... I won't." she closed her eyes tight. "I won't let him come home until he agrees to get help." Her eyes opened and I could see resolve. "I've learned a lot today and it's opened my eyes. Although, I still want you to work on some things, Edward, I see I have plenty to work on as well."

I had an amazing bullshit detector and it wasn't going off. She was sincere, and for the first time I saw remorse in my mother's eyes.

"The only way I would be comfortable with Edward going back with you is if you agree to see a counselor twice a week, Mrs. Masen," he said, writing it down. He turned to me "Once for you, Edward, and then once together. Also, I want you two to travel down here to see me once per week."

We both agreed to his terms. He wrote it all down then set his pen down, leaning on his elbows atop his desk.

"This is only contingent on Mr. Masen being out of the house. I am going to involve social services as well, and they will be doing random checks. They will know what I ordered as far as counseling and as far as Edward's father staying out of the house. They will report to me. This is your last chance, Mrs. Masen. I hope you take it seriously."

She nodded and promised to keep her end of the deal. Carlisle turned to me.

"What do you want to do, Edward? At this point the decision is fully up to you."

I expected no miracle to come from my mom, and I still didn't want a relationship with her. Weighing out my options I had to make a choice. I could go to a group home, which would mean a new school and possibly not being close to Bella, or my home, minus my dad and maybe a healthier mom. There was no question.

There was only one thing I wanted promised to me.

"I'll go home on one more condition..." They both looked over at me. "I want Carlisle to choose the doctors we see; I don't trust you for shit." I said looking coolly, almost hatefully into my mom's eyes. Even though I didn't like to see her cry, I still hated her for what she had done to me.

"No need for the language, but I already have two people in mind."

Mom agreed and I went up to pack my bags, still unwilling to believe I was truly leaving that place and hoping I made the right decision to go home.

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**Yay! Edward's going home! The story is coming close to an end. I'm thinking 5 chapters or less to go :) **

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	28. Chapter 28 Pain and Promises

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These day pass me by

I dream with open eyes

Nightmares haunt my days

Visions blur my nights

If it doesn't break your heart, it isn't love

No, if it doesn't break your heart, it's not enough

**It's when you're breaking down with your insides coming out**

**That's when you find out what your heart is made of**

**And you haven't lost me yet**

**Yet by Switchfoot**

**BPOV**

Unbearable, those weeks had been beyond unbearable. I'm not sure what was worse; not knowing where Edward was or knowing where he was, but not being able to do anything about it. While Edward had been gone I spent my time going to school and trying to figure out a way to get him out.

He had been there almost three weeks. Going to the center with Mom and Dan had done no good. That was one week ago, and I'd still heard nothing from Edward.

It had been about two months since my dad died and the pain hadn't lessened, not at all. While Edward being gone had been a distraction, it was also another level of pain added on to my life. I had to accept that I'd done everything possible to help my dad and Edward. All I could do was just wait. The situation had blown so far out of control and there was nothing else I could do to help Edward. I just hoped bringing the letters and information to his doctor would at least make the doctor question whether or not the Volturi Center was the right place for Edward.

My mom had done everything she could to help us, but there was nothing more she could do, either. She was dealing with her own grief, and I felt guilty for her taking on the stress of my situation as well. She started therapy as soon as she could. It seemed to be helping her, or at least that's what she wanted me to think.

She didn't know it, but I could still hear her crying herself to sleep every night. I could hear her cry every morning before she came out of her room with a big smile and happy show to help me get through my day. Alice, Jasper and even Dale had all been great - helping anyway they could, but nothing could fix the hole my dad made when he left.

I looked at the clock and saw it was after midnight. I didn't like to go, but I had school the next morning. The only reason I kept going and kept my grades up was for Edward and my dad. They would both be disappointed if I gave up. Even though I tried to live normally each day and plastered a smile on my face whenever I was around other people, I could feel myself growing sad. All the recent changes - every change being negative - were wearing on me. I could feel myself growing increasingly depressed. I wasn't sure what to do and had no desire to seek help.

I was tired of thinking, so with one last glance out of my window, I lay down and cried myself to sleep.

**~*E&B*~**

School that day seemed never ending. Even though Edward was gone, I still had some classes with Jasper, and those helped me get through my days. Even though Jasper did all he could to keep my mind off things, I still preferred spending time alone. I ate lunch in my car and left the first second I could. My new goal was to get through a school day without crying. I was getting more and more successful, but it was a struggle. It seemed that anything and everything could set me off.

I sat in my last class fighting tears throughout the stupid movie we were being forced to watch. I couldn't tell you what the movie was, what was happening, or why it was upsetting me so much. There was nothing in the movie that triggered my tears, they just came.

It seemed that since my dad died and Edward disappeared, just about anything could send me into an emotional spiral and I hated it. I didn't have a clue how to control it, so I just hid it the best I could. I sat thinking of different excuses to leave class before anyone noticed. When I couldn't think of a single excuse to leave, and the tears started to flow faster, I decided to just walk out. Most teachers didn't give me crap if I left when I needed to. All my work was turned in and my grades stayed up; that kept them off my back. The kids in the school just ignored me and my off behavior.

I stood and felt like the air was knocked out of me. I didn't know what was happening. My silent tears turned into gasping. I couldn't get enough air and felt suffocated in the dark classroom.

"Everything ok, Bella?" the teacher whispered from her desk, causing every student to turn and stare at me. I frantically nodded my head, not being able to speak and dashed out of the classroom.

When the bright light from outside hit my eyes and the cool air touched my skin I was able to take a deep breath. Even though it wasn't warm outside, I felt my skin flush, and I started to sweat. I had no idea what was happening to me. I bent over trying to take deep breaths. When they wouldn't come, I just sat on the cold pavement.

I realized quickly I was having a panic attack. Those attacks were new to me and I had no idea how to control them or prevent them. I was too embarrassed to ask for help, so I just dealt with them when they came. I started taking slow, long breaths and tried to calm down.

Images of my dad dying were flying through my head and I couldn't get them to stop. Then images of Edward sneaking out of his window and being chased by his maniac of a father sent me into another spiral. I wanted Edward and didn't know how much longer I could handle not talking to him, knowing how he was, or making sure he knew I loved him. I hoped that while we were apart he knew, without a doubt, that I loved him.

**~*E&B*~**

Sitting at my desk during English, I made my own calendar. I started marking down the days until May thirteenth - the days until Edward turned eighteen and could come back to me. Every evil number on that little calendar caused me more pain than was probably normal.

With a sigh, I looked up at the clock, mentally urging the hand to move faster and free me from my last class of the day. I wanted to go home and go to bed. Alice and my mom were giving me a ton of crap for sleeping most of my days away, but I would rather sleep then to have cried the days away. Mom signed me up for bereavement therapy at the hospital. I agreed to go so it wouldn't upset her, but I had no intentions of following through.

After what seemed like an eternity, the bell rang, and we were free to leave. Slowly, I packed my things up and walked out the door. The air was filled with mist, so I kept my head tilted to the ground, trying to keep it out of my face. Instead of driving home, I found myself driving to Edward's house, like I had so many days before. Emmett skipped town, and I had no idea where he went. His parents were always gone in the afternoon, so there was no one there to bug me.

Edward's car doors had been left unlocked, and I would often sit in the driver's seat. It still smelled like him still. It both cured me and killed me at the same time. Some days I would sleep, tired from nightmares that kept me awake. Some days I would read or do homework, noticing hours had passed, shocking me at the speed the minutes had gone by.

I laid my head against the steering wheel and started to cry. Hot tears blazed down my cheeks, and I didn't have the energy to wipe them away. What had my life become? I hated how weak I had become, but thinking like that just made me cry harder. My phone was ringing over and over, but I ignored it. I couldn't believe how pathetic I was. There I was sitting in my boyfriend's car, having a complete pity party for myself, for my old life.

"Shit," I shouted when I was caught off guard by someone tapping on the widow. I was instantly still and terrified that one of Edward's parents had caught me on their property... err _in_ their property, after I was told not to come back. My body sagged with relief when I looked up and saw Alice's face almost pressed against the glass.

I opened the door, embarrassed that she caught me like that.

"Bella, what are you doing here?" Sympathy oozed from her voice and her expression - it was too much for me to handle.

I tried to say that I didn't know, because I really didn't, but all I could do was shake my head as I started to tremble and the grief overtook me.

**~*E&B*~**

"How did you find me?" I asked after sitting in silence for a while. We were sitting in my living room and I could tell Alice was waiting for me to start the conversation.

"Jasper said he saw you leave school. You weren't at home, and you weren't at your mom's work. I was calling your phone and you wouldn't answer. I wasn't sure where else to look, so I checked the one place - the last place I expected to find you. Imagine my surprise when I saw your truck, empty, in the drive." Her voice wasn't unfriendly, but she _did_ sound a little annoyed.

"How long have you been doing that?" Alice asked, her tone much more caring and soft. I took a minute before I answered her because I was embarrassed to tell her the truth.

"How long, Bella?"

"Almost daily." It was a whisper, but she heard it.

"God, Bella. Why didn't you tell me you were this depressed?"

I instantly became defensive. "Because I'm not. I'm not depressed."

"Oh, you know what? You're right. Because people who are perfectly fine, and aren't depressed at all, often sneak onto private property they aren't allowed to be on and break into their boyfriend's car to sob into the steering wheel."

"I wasn't _sobbing. _I was just having... a moment." God, that sounded pathetic, even to my own ears.

"Yes. A moment… in your boyfriend's car… that you broke into. On property, that you're not allowed to be on. My bad, totally over-exaggerated that one," she said dramatically, waving her hands in the air.

I gave her a hard look and she threw it right back at me. Then, I broke down - again. It was getting old.

"Oh, Bella." Alice said as she scooted over next to me on the couch, throwing both arms around me. "I'm so sorry all this is happening to you, and I think it's so normal for you to be sad... to be depressed. It's ok."

She was right. I was depressed and obviously desperate. Even as I was crying into my best friend's chest, I still couldn't admit it out loud.

**~*E&B*~**

I'm not sure how many hours passed before my mom walked in the door. Alice left a while before, with a promise to meet me after school the next day and to keep me busy. I looked over at my mom to say hi, but what I saw kept the words from coming out. Her eyes were red and puffy and her cheeks flushed. She looked exhausted.

"Mom, did you just get off work?" I asked, realizing that she should have been home over an hour before.

"Uh, no. I had a therapy appointment… and then... went to visit your dad." Instantly, I was uncomfortable and she knew it. I didn't know what was wrong with me or my wiring, but I couldn't go. "Visiting him", as she put it so nicely, was too permanent for me - to complete.

"Are you ok?" I asked, not so sure I really wanted to hear the answer. Obviously, she wasn't ok, and that's not how you wanted to see your mom.

"Bella..." She opened and closed her mouth a couple of times, stopping herself from speaking. She took off her coat, then walked over and sat on the couch with me, resting her hand on my lap. It was shaking.

"No, Bella. I'm not ok - but that's ok." I looked at her confused.

"It's ok to not be ok, Bella. Alice called me today... she told me where she found you - what you've been doing, and I'm lost. I don't know what to do to help you and now... I'm all alone. I have to figure it out on my own."

Tears started streaming down her face in fast succession and she aged right before my eyes. I was uncomfortable with showing any form of emotion in front of my mother. I don't know why. I knew without a doubt she would comfort me, be there for me, but I just couldn't open up to her. That, too, was new.

"I'm sorry, Mom." My voice came out hoarse and rough.

"Oh no, sweetie." Her hand came up and gently brushed my forehead, like she did so many times when I was a little girl. "I don't want you to be sorry or to be tough for me. Those things aren't your job. I just want you to be happy. I know it hasn't been long and all of this... shit." I looked up, surprised at her choice of words. "I'm sorry, but it is just shit. Those people will get what's coming to them, Bella, for hurting that boy. People like them always do. You need to take that responsibility off yourself. You can't save Edward. Grieve for your dad, miss Edward, but you can't let it destroy you."

I couldn't hold the tears back anymore. I was biting the inside of my cheek, pinching my hands and legs but nothing could stop them. Silently, I cried. I felt selfish. Yes, Edward was gone for now and yes, it was unfair. I worried about him and knew he was most likely unhappy, but he would be back. My mom would always be alone - my dad was never coming back.

"Mom..." I could barely breathe to get out what I wanted to say. Tears were blinding my vision and the words wouldn't come, so I choked out the only words I could, "I'm so sorry." I lurched forward, clinging to her as if my life depended on it, and she clung back just as hard.

This time she didn't correct me. She understood I wasn't apologizing for my behavior or for her being stressed out. She understood I was apologizing to her because she lost the love of her life. For the first time, I saw my mom as someone other than my mother. I saw her as a woman whose heart had been ripped away.

**~*E&B*~**

I went to therapy the next day, just to show my mom I loved her and wanted to support her. I hated it. My mother and I are… well, we're different. She got a lot out of therapy and needed to get her grief out. I did everything in my power to hold it in. I'm sure it wasn't a healthy way to handle it, but it was the only way I knew how to.

Question after question was fired out. These things were personal to me and I had no desire to share them with anyone else, so I didn't. As respectfully as I could, I declined to answer ninety percent of the questions, but listened as my mom answered every single one. She cried, she laughed, and I was envious. I couldn't let it out – anything. I couldn't let anything out. It seemed anger was the only emotion surging through my veins.

I thought my mom would be disappointed in me because I wasn't able to open up like she could. She wasn't, though. She thanked me for trying and asked me to continue to try. I made no promises, but the fact I came home after school and didn't go sit in Edward's car was good enough for her at that moment.

After arriving home, I spent the evening on the couch. I thought about calling Alice or trying to go do something, but I didn't feel up to it. When I felt the tears coming again, I decided to just take another nap. I couldn't handle sitting in my room again, crying alone. Even though it was barely eight, my eyes felt tired and it wasn't hard for sleep to overtake me.

**~*E&B*~**

A noise woke me up and I rolled over to see it was almost one in the morning. I didn't care that I fell asleep on the couch, so I decided to just spend the night there. Thinking it was just the wind, I closed my eyes and tried to fall back asleep. Then, I heard it again. I sat straight up, terrified because I realized that someone was trying to get into the back door.

My entire body started to shake, and I almost screamed for my dad. I was filled with dread when I remembered that he wasn't there to help me. I couldn't scream for my mom and bring her in here to be harmed, too.

The entire back window started to shake from the force of whoever was on the other side. I started to search frantically in the dark for my phone so I could call the police. I could see the window giving away and I couldn't find my damn phone, so I jumped off the couch and crawled underneath the table, hoping that someone above was watching me and would make this intruder pass over my hiding spot.

I couldn't see the window from my spot, but I could hear it finally give away and the curtains being pulled back. My entire form was shaking and my heart was beating so fast and loud that it probably could've given me away.

With soft steps someone entered the room. The cold air from the door being open hit me and my breath caught - loudly. Footsteps started my way and I knew I had been found. Scrambling back as far as I could, I planned to kick the intruder's legs as hard as I could, then escape out the open door.

When a black shoe and a walking cast came in my view, I leaned back and kicked with all my might.

"Fuck."

I became more still than I was before. I didn't need to run - it was Edward. Sliding on my stomach and out from underneath the table, my eyes confirmed what my ears had heard. In my living room, rubbing his good leg that I had just kicked, was Edward. I stood there with my mouth open, frozen, having no idea what to do. I couldn't believe he was really there and I was worried my mind was playing a cruel trick.

"Bella," he said softly. I couldn't even speak. Hot tears started to run down my face and I stood there, still frozen in my spot.

"Don't cry," he pleaded, and suddenly my body was released from its frozen state.

I launched myself at him and took my first real breath in weeks when I felt his arms wrap around me. He squeezed me so tightly that it was hurting, but I said nothing. It was the best pain I'd ever felt. I was about to ask him how he was there and how he escaped, but his mouth crashed into mine and all rational thought left me.

This kiss was like nothing I had ever felt before. All the love I had for him went into it. Before I knew what was happening, I was lifted into his arms and onto the couch. Straddling his waist, I pulled back just to make sure it was really him; that he was really back. Slowly, I lifted my hand and ran it through his hair. He leaned into my touch and kissed my palm.

"God, I missed you so much," he whispered into my hand.

"I couldn't breathe, for weeks now, I couldn't breathe," I said, trying to keep my emotions under control.

"It's ok," he whispered. "I'm never leaving again." I knew that was something he really couldn't promise. People left all the time. I'd learned that they can be taken away from you in so many ways. For that moment, though, I decided to live in that dream world and believe that he would never leave me again.

He reached for the hem of my shirt, pulling it off over my head. Leaning in to kiss him, I knew that we would spend the entire night memorizing each other. We could worry about facing reality the next day.

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**Yay! They are back together!  
The next chapter should be all B and E together... finally! These kids need some happiness if I say so myself ;)  
I can't believe this story is coming to an end :( hopefully I can get the next update out sooner. It all depends on my school load. **

**If you want a heads up on updates or if you just want to chat find me on twitter kdc2239  
I'll try to post another teaser on my LJ at some point **

**As always, I love to hear what you think!  
**


	29. Chapter 29 Moving Forward

***Hides from things being thrown***  
**I know, I know! I'm so sorry for the long wait. Life has not been kind when it comes to allowing free time. **

**Huge thank you to Whatobsession for looking this over, even though her schedule is crazy busy!**

**Hope you guys like it!**

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_Are you still in love with me_

_Like the way you used to be or is it changing?_

_Does it deepen over time like the river_

_That is winding through the Canyon?_

_Are you still in love with her?_

_Do you remember how you were before the sorrow?_

_Are you closer for the tears_

_Or has the weight of all the years left you hollow?_

_-Ray LaMontagne _

**EPOV**

"You're here. You're really here," Bella said looking up at my eyes, tears brimmed in her own.

Instead of responding, I leaned down, kissed her forehead, her lips, then lower to her chest. She started to squirm below me, but I knew we couldn't have sex again. Renee was still oblivious I was in her home, let alone that I was downstairs having sex with her daughter. I couldn't help it though. It had been so long since I'd seen her last and neither one of us could stop.

Leaning over, I blindly searched around with my hand, trying to find her shirt. I handed it to her, and with a pout, she pulled it over her head. Reluctantly, I sat up to find Bella's pants and my own clothing. The last thing I wanted for my first night back was for us to get caught. I didn't think I could handle one more situation where drama was involved.

Once we were both dressed Bella didn't hesitate launching into questioning me.

"How are you here? You're leaving again, aren't you?"

"No, I'm not leaving again I -"

"How? Did you run away? How did you escape?" She looked so panicked and worried.

"Baby, let me explain it." I said with a little laugh, so she knew I wasn't annoyed with her.

I understood she was overwhelmed. Her face turned a little pink as she nodded.

"I don't have to go back, and no, I didn't run; they just let me go." I could see a million questions dancing in her eyes, but I continued before she could cut me off again.

"Every session I had with the doctor - every time I worked with him - I told him everything I could, tried to get him to see my side. After you came in - I can't believe you did that by the way." I tried so hard to make it so she wasn't involved, but she involved herself anyway.

"Once I knew where you were, there was no way I was just going to sit here. I had to try."

I felt bad for saying anything, and if the situation where reversed I would have burned the damn place down just to get her out. Grabbing her hand I went in to kiss her again.

"Thank you for trying to help me," I said, resting my forehead on hers.

"Of course," she responded, gently rubbing her head against mine, letting out a sigh.

"Anyway, after all of that, the doctor decided to call my mom and dad in so we could all talk together. My dad... well, he acted just like he does and blew up. Freaked out on everyone in the room before storming out."

Bella leaned back and rolled her eyes.

"After that, the doctor was pretty much on my side. Between him, me and my mom we worked out a plan. I could go home, but my mom and I have to do counseling together and separately. My dad can't come home until he also agrees to the plan set up."

"He won't stay away. You know he won't. What will happen then?"

"My mom insisted she wouldn't let him come home but Dr. Cullen - that's his name, said he would be checking in and also having social services check in. My dad really has no choice but to comply."

"Dr. Cullen... I hated him because he wouldn't let me see you. I'm glad you convinced him though."

"You know my parents. They're pretty good liars, but he saw through the bullshit eventually; he's a good guy."

"So that's it? You're coming back to school, and you're home for good?"

I nodded with a big smile. Her smile wasn't matching mine though.

"What's the matter?" My stomach dropped as my mind wondered if she changed her mind about me while I was gone.

"I just don't want you living there, even if your dad's gone."

"It's only for a couple months and then I'm moving," I said trying to reassure her. When her expression didn't relax I went on.

"It's going to be different... it has to be, that was the deal. I mean, I don't trust her - I never will again, but she seemed more sincere than I have ever seen her in my life. It's like someone finally got through her crazy."

Bella still looked skeptical and if I were honest, I wasn't feeling very hopeful myself but there was nothing else I could do. I just had to wait until I was eighteen and plan to make sure I could move out the second the clock hit midnight.

"Does she know you're here now? Why in the world did you break into my house?" she asked laughing. "You scared me."

"I'm sorry," I said, and I really was.

I wasn't expecting her to be up, let alone downstairs. As creepy as it sounds I just wanted to see her. I wasn't planning on waking her up, but I couldn't be so close to her without seeing her.

"No. She has no idea that I'm here, but I'm done caring. She cried almost the whole way home then went right to bed."

Bella just stared at me waiting for me to answer the rest of her question.

"The back door is how I always snuck in and out of my parent's house. If you wiggle the handle the lock releases pretty easily. I assumed yours was the same... but I think I broke the handle." I admitted embarrassed.

Bella looked behind her at the handle that was hanging from the door lifeless. "You think?" she asked laughing.

"I'll fix it tomorrow, promise."

"Why didn't you just knock?"

I was embarrassed to tell her the truth but did anyway. Bella was sweet and just kissed me. When I looked out the window and saw the sun was rising I knew I needed to get home. There was no point in starting more trouble by not being there when my mom woke up.

Bella didn't want me to leave, and when her tears started I almost changed my mind. My family and I had made her cry enough. With a promise to be back in a few hours I left her house - through the front door that time.

**~*E&B*~**

"No shit! Sally? Is that really you?"

Jasper stepped back and rubbed his hands over his eyes dramatically. Bella stood next to me laughing. We had just gotten to school in time to catch Jasper smoking by his car. I assumed Alice hadn't won that battle with him completely yet.

"What the hell, man? You freaked us out with your disappearing act," he said, giving me an awkward half hug.

"Nice hardware," he said kicking one of my crutches.

"They're a pain in the ass. It comes off in a week." I motioned to my cast.

Bella and I caught him up on what had happened exactly. He assured me that his mom was still ok with me moving in after I turned eighteen.

"Yeah. Rose moved out, so her room is all yours. You should feel right at home, Sally - it's painted pink."

Well, Jasper hadn't changed.

"You know me too well," I joked, as we walked toward the building.

Bella and Jasper had class, but I didn't. Not only did my parents send me away, they actually pulled me from school. I was on my way to the office where my mom was going to meet me to get me re-enrolled.

Walking into the office building every face looked up and stared at me. I was now either known as the trouble maker who had to be pulled from school because his parents couldn't control him. Or, I was the kid with the crazy parents who pulled him from school for no reason. I lost either way. I sat on a chair looking down trying to pretend I didn't care what people thought - I didn't want to care.

My mom walked in and sat next to me. Neither of us said a word in greeting to each other. She turned to me and attempted to twice, but I kept my eyes trained on the carpet.

"Mrs. Masen, Edward, the principal is ready to see you."

A woman who I knew as the principals secretary, but had never met her before, walked us back to the principal's office.

"Edward. We're glad to see you back," the principal replied warmly to me as my mom and I sat in his office.

The meeting was a huge disappointment. Going back to my old classes was really not an option. In order to graduate on time, I would have to take some classes over the internet and work my ass off.

"I'm sorry, Edward, but it's just so late in the year."

"There's nothing you can do? He's a good student."

"Mrs. Masen, Edward has missed a lot of material. The classes he's re-entering are ones where the teacher is willing to spend the extra time to catch him up. The internet courses and classes with spaces are the only options at this point."

My mom just looked down to her lap. Sickening as it was it took that - all of that, the hospital, the fights, that meeting for her to realize how much she truly fucked up.

I was pissed. My parents fucked with my education just to prove they could force me to do what they wanted me to do. I looked over at my mom with what I'm sure was a look of pure hate.

"I hope you're happy," I said in an even tone.

I thanked the principal, grabbed my crutches and left, leaving her in tears.

With my new schedule I went through the day in shitty classes. I only had one class with Jasper and two with Bella. My lunch was separate from theirs as well. It was just another resentment to add to my growing list against my parents.

**~*E&B*~**

"We're so happy you're back," Renee said giving my shoulders a squeeze, as she sat a salad on the table in front of me.

"Thanks."

"So... catch me up. I already know you broke into my house," she said with a smile as she sat down.

I came over after school and fixed the lock, and Renee insisted I stay for dinner.

"Sorry," I said sheepishly.

"Next time just knock, ok?"

I agreed with a laugh. Bella sat down and we all ate while we caught Renee up with everything.

"Are you going to be ok there?" she asked with concern.

"Yeah, I'll be fine."

"Always so tough," she joked but left the subject alone.

"Do you have your car - your phone?"

"I repaid the insurance during the time they took it away so she's letting me drive my car again and -

"Wait. She made you pay the insurance during the months that _they_ wouldn't let you drive the car?"

I just looked at her and nodded. I was still embarrassed when the details of how stupid my parents were came out; even if it was just in front of Renee.

"Unbelievable," she said under her breath taking a bite of her dinner.

"What about the phone?"

"She said I don't need one, and I'm not eighteen yet so I can't get my own."

"Yes, you can. We'll get you a pre-paid one for the next couple months and if she doesn't like it, she can deal with me."

I didn't know about my mom, but I wouldn't mess with Renee when she was like that.

"I'm starting my job back up next week. Billy is gonna let me work whatever I can with school, so I should have enough to move out in a couple months."

"Just let us know if you need help, Edward."

I nodded.

"I'm serious," she added.

We spent the rest of dinner catching up. It was obvious that the two were still in unbearable pain from the passing of Charlie, but it seemed they were learning how to live a new life - a life without him.

After dinner Bella and I went up to her room. I'd been home a couple of days but we had yet had time to just sit and talk.

"Door open!" Renee yelled up the stairs. Bella rolled her eyes but left the door cracked to appease her mom.

When she sat on her bed I took a minute to look at her - to really look. She had obviously lost weight, and it looked like she hadn't slept in weeks. I looked around her room and noticed tissues by her bed and everything else in chaos, from its normal clean look.

"Are you ok?" I asked. She knew what I meant. She looked down and her lap and started playing with her hands.

"Tell me what happened while I was gone," I demanded softly, and she did.

With some tears and some laughs she told me about her waiting for me every morning to take me to school. She told me how much it scared her when I never showed. I got pissed but hid it, when I found out how she confronted my parents and Emmett to find me.

She told me how Jasper looked out for her at school and how he stood up for her against my parents. She told me how Alice and Jasper had stood by her and helped her. Reluctantly, she told me how her mom and Alice thought she was depressed. When she told me some of the things she was doing, I couldn't disagree with them. I felt like shit that I didn't know what to say - I didn't know how to fix that. So much had happened while I was locked away, and I wasn't sure how to make it right.

**~*E&B*~**

"No, he won't agree to any of it."

I didn't know where my dad was, but he wasn't home.

"And you've kept to your agreement." My mom nodded then Dr. Cullen turned to me.

"I guess she has. I mean, it's too late, you know? They pulled so much shit. There's no way I can just get over it and act like nothing ever happened because she's being nice for a month."

"I understand that. It's going to take hard work from both of you if you want to repair this relationship."

I wasn't so sure I wanted to repair anything.

I'd been home for a month. My cast was off and it was great to have my leg back to normal. She had backed off a lot compared to before, but it wasn't good enough. Like I said to Dr. Cullen - too much had happened. She was still weird about my time with Bella, but not as much as she had been before. I had a curfew and still some ridiculous guidelines, but I just played by her rules, for the most part, because I would be leaving in a month.

We talked for a few more minutes before Dr. Cullen excused us. The drive home was uncomfortable.

"How has Bella been?"

"Fine." The last thing I wanted was to make small talk with her.

"Do you think we should invite her over for dinner this week?"

"No." Like I would ever ask Bella to be around her again.

"Well, Edward, we're working on things, I would like to have the opportunity to work things out with her as well."

"It's not an opportunity you deserve."

I could feel her staring at me but never bothered looking her direction. For the long drive home my eyes were glued to the passenger window. I was done talking with her.

I was anxious to get home. All I wanted to do is go see Bella. Alice and her mom said she seemed better since I had gotten home, but I still noticed differences in her, big differences. She wasn't the same person anymore. Some of the changes were subtle and some were more drastic. I understood. Nothing in her life was the same way as it was before - nothing. So why would she be the same; it wouldn't make any sense for her to be.

It was April and the flowers opening gave the air a light open feel. A drastic opposite from the stifling tension in the car. Pulling into the driveway I let out a big breath. I wanted out of that car and away from her. I opened the door and jumped out before she came to a complete stop. I had my keys on me and jogged to my car.

"Be home by curfew!" she hollered out of her window.

I rolled my eyes and drove away. It felt good to be back in my own car. To have some sort of illusion of freedom. I rolled my windows down letting the fresh air saturate the car and my lungs. There was a promise of summer in the air and with that a promise of freedom. We would be graduated and on our own then - I couldn't wait.

**~*E&B*~**

"You cheated!"

"You're crazy."

"I am not! You so cheated!"

Bella's head was thrown back, her face red as tears leaked out of her eyes. She was laughing. It's something we didn't see often anymore. Although Jasper and Alice's antics were obnoxious, I prayed they would never stop if they got her to laugh like that.

"Edward, you're up," Jasper said throwing the dice in my direction.

"Oh no he's not! You cheated and we're not moving on until you fix it!" Alice demanded laughing.

Jasper was going about his businesses pretending like he couldn't hear her. He addressed Bella and I but was acting like Alice wasn't in the room.

"Ugh, you act like you're two, Jasper!"

We all laughed and Bella stood up and went into Jasper's kitchen, coming back with bottled water for everyone. The game was quickly forgotten, pointless, because Jasper _was_ cheating.

"I can't believe you guys are leaving this summer," Bella said.

"I know, I haven't even started packing yet."

"Alice, it's three months away, you have time," Jasper said. He only got an eye roll in response from the girls.

"Bella, we found a place! I forgot to tell you. You guys will have to take a trip down there with us so you can see it."

"Of course we'll come down. We're gonna help you move too, so we'll see it."

I saw some sadness in her eyes as she spoke. I know she wasn't looking forward to losing her best friend.

"We'll come visit you guys too, it's not _that_ far." Alice sounded like she was trying to not only convince Bella, but herself too.

"Well we have a move to take care of before then, should we get started?" Bella asked with a big smile.

My birthday was the next day and I was getting the hell out of my house. We planned to spend the day at Jasper's to get my new room together. A ton of Rose's shit was still in there, but she said she was fine with us boxing it up.

We spent the afternoon cleaning the room out. I insisted it wasn't really necessary, because I would only be there about a month. We graduated the next month and Bella and I were planning to move into our own place. Jasper's mom insisted we do it though. I figured she saw it as free labor to get the room cleaned. It worked for me though. I really appreciated her letting me stay there for free.

"Shit, what time is it?" Jasper asked looking up from a pile he was loading in a box.

"Four," I responded. "We have time."

I had never met anyone with worse time management than Jasper. Billy was a pretty laid back boss, but Jasper was late nine times out of ten and he was losing his patients. Jasper couldn't afford to lose his job if he and Alice were going to move into their own place so he was trying to not be late anymore.

We had to be at work at five. Billy was bringing in all of his equipment to the yard and was paying us overtime to clean it. It would take up most of our Saturday night but the extra money was worth it.

"Well let's take a break, we can finish this tonight," Bella offered.

"You sure you don't mind?" I asked kissing her forehead.

"Nope, we'll have a girl's night," Alice responded for her.

Bella seemed more like herself today than she had in a while. It was nice to see her laugh and enjoy herself. It had only been a few months since she'd lost her dad, and I knew she wouldn't snap back anytime soon. It was nice to see her have days like this, when the grief would give her a break and let her be normal.

It was soon time for Jasper and I to leave. Saying goodbye to the girls we jumped into my car and headed to work.

"You gonna have enough money to move out by fall?"

"I think so," I responded, trying to add up the figures in my head. "How about you?"

"As long as I don't get my ass fired, yeah." We both laughed knowing it would be only by the grace of Billy's patience that Jasper wouldn't get fired.

"You excited to move out tomorrow?" he asked.

I nodded. I was excited, but I was also nervous as to how it would play out the next day. I planned to put whatever was mine to take in my car and drive away. My mom didn't know of our plans and I couldn't handle another blow out fight. I just hoped everything would go smoothly then Bella and I could move on with our lives.

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**There's only a chapter or two left. I'm thinking one more chapter then an epilogue.  
Who's POV would you like to read for the last chapter? EPOV or BPOV? **

**Would love to hear what you think! **


	30. Chapter 30 The End

**Hey everyone! It's finally here... the journey for these two has come to an end.  
Thanks for all of your encouragement throughout this story. **

**Huge thank you, and I mean HUGE, to Whatobsession17. She is my pre -reader, beta, hand holder, ass kicker, pimp, banner maker... the list goes on but she's an amazing friend who has helped me every step of the way. Love you, bb!**

**Another huge thank you to everyone who has read, reviewed and pimped this story. You guys are awesome. **

**WO made and awesome banner just for this last chapter - you can find it herehttp: / yfrog (dot) com/ gz3ns0j (take spaces out) or on twitter where we play. kdc2239 there too. **

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_**I just wanna hold you**_

_**Take you by your hand**_

_**And tell you that you're good enough**_

_**And tell you that it's gonna be tough**_

_**-Kings of Leon**_

**BPOV**

There was shouting and screaming all around me. I laughed as I watched Jasper run up to Edward and jump on his back almost tackling him to the ground. A sea of bright, ugly yellow was spread out before me as I watched our senior class celebrate their achievement. Once Edward was able to push Jasper off he jogged over to me.

"Congratulations," he said with a smile, kissing me.

"You too," I said, wrapping my arms around his neck.

Our moment was interrupted by Alice and Jasper.

"Oh my god! Can you believe we're done?" Alice screeched, hugging us both.

"I know, it's crazy," I said, hugging my best friend tightly, not wanting to let go.

In just a few weeks her and Jasper would be gone - off to start their new lives together. Edward's and my future was still up in the air, but I tried to push that out of my mind for the time being.

"There are the graduates!"

We turned to see my mom and Alice's dad walking towards us with large smiles.

Renee took her time squeezing us equally hard and long, telling each of us why she was so proud of us specifically. Dale gave the guys hand-shakes and Alice and I awkward, one armed hugs. The situation with Alice and her dad had improved dramatically, but I had a feeling their relationship would always have a formal feel to it.

Jaspers mom and sister Rose soon joined the group, and everyone ignored the elephant sized fact that Edward's parents were the only ones missing from the equation. I knew his mom was coming but apparently didn't feel comfortable joining the group.

Edward had moved out a month prior - at midnight - on his eighteenth birthday. His mom was shocked but sat silently watching Alice, Jasper and I move what little belongings he had into Jasper's car. We waited on the porch so he could say goodbye to her. From my standpoint, I had seen her ignore him, offering him no goodbye and shutting the door as soon as his body crossed the threshold.

Within the week we had noticed his dad's car was back in the driveway. Apparently she wasn't too torn up about Edward's moving out.

Alice's dad and Jasper's mom started talking to them about their impending move and my mom took the moment to pull me aside. She had a large smile on her face but tears in her eyes.

"I'm sure this day was hard for you, and I don't want to make it harder," she started, a tear rolling down her cheek, "but I just want you to know how _proud_ your dad would be - is, no is - he's with us, and he is so proud of you, Bella."

Emotion choked me, and I just nodded and threw my body into hers, gripping her tightly.

"Thanks mom," I whispered into her ear, feeling hot tears roll down my cheeks.

Dad died in February, it was only June and the pain was still so fresh. At times his death felt like a cut that would never heal, a cancer that still lingered in our lives. We had bad days, and we had them often, but the good ones were becoming more frequent. My mom and I were always close but we've grown even closer.

I opened my eyes, still in my mom's embrace to see all of our classmates being engaged by their family and friends. Edward stood alone amongst the crowd. He twisted his diploma in his hand, ran a hand threw his hair, then looked down and seemed too interested in his shoes. I felt bad for him to be the only one who was not being embraced by loved ones. He always he claimed he didn't care - that he was better off without them - but no one wants to be alone.

Once Edward had moved out, a huge stress was lifted from all our lives. The weight of his abusive home life had been a heavy one, and we were all happy to see him escape it. His mom and he have met for lunch a couple of times. She was trying to heal their relationship but the old saying of 'a little too late' seemed it would forever curse any reunion between them. His dad had made no effort to contact him at all, and I figured he was better off without him. Emmett was still off on his own but had started calling Edward. They were slowly repairing their relationship. While I no longer held any animosity towards my old best friend, Emmett and I would never be close again.

I was just about to step away from my mom to include Edward when his mother sheepishly broke through the crowd of yellow. Her perfectly starched, red dress with matching nails and heels stood out amongst everyone around her. She and Edward hugged awkwardly. She leaned forward and said something as she pulled an invisible piece of fuzz off his gown. He stepped back a little but was smiling.

I was shocked when Emmett's large form spread the crowd and slapped Edward on his back. Edward turned quickly and the look on his face made it clear he was surprised; he was only expecting his mom.

Mom was still talking animatedly to me, not noticing what was going on behind us - I couldn't take my eyes off though.

Elizabeth and Emmett flanked Edward on either side and were both actively engaged and looking at his diploma. My tears dried and a smile ghosted across my face. No matter how much I disliked these people, they were his family and all he had. I was happy with any healthy attention he could soak up from them - God knew he deserved it. Too soon though, the interaction turned awkward. You could read it on all their faces - especially Edwards as he searched for me. When we made eye-contact he smiled, and I knew I was grinning like a fool back. I never knew I would love someone so much and never dreamed I would be loved like I was.

My mom noticed them shortly after and rolled her eyes at Elizabeth's presence.

"I suppose the right thing to do is to say hi," she said sounding like a sulking teenager.

I laughed. "Yes, I suppose you're right," I said using her word.

Edward walked over to us catching the notice of his mom and brother who reluctantly followed.

Edwards arms wrap around me and he asked me if I was okay, noticing my tears. I said yes and asked him just the same and he assured me he was fine.

"Renee... looks like our babies are officially grown up's," Elizabeth laughed insincerely, with her hands clasped in front of her.

"Very proud of these too," Renee announced squeezing in between Edward and I embracing us both. I saw a flash of pain across Edward's mom's expression when she sees her son embrace my mom with much more enthusiasm than he did with her.

"Congrats guys! Doesn't it feel good to be done?" Emmett said smiling.

Apprehensively, with his eyes on Edward measuring his reaction, he gave me a very lose hug.

"Yes, Bella, congratulations. This is a very big accomplishment," Elizabeth said reaching out squeezing my hand once Emmett stepped aside.

Even though her words didn't feel sincere, I accepted the compliment and reached forward giving her the most awkward, loose hug of my life.

"Well... I'm sure you already have all your plans," Elizabeth says, giving a sideways glance at my mom. "But if you want you can come by the house for dessert... or something." She looked so uncomfortable. "Both of you, of course," she added as an afterthought.

"Thanks... but I think we'll take a rain check," Edward said politely.

"Okay." She smiled, but you could see the tears spring in her eyes. For a minute I felt bad for her, before I remembered that her and her husband caused this.

A big party was planned at Alice's house for most of the graduating class. We said goodbye to our families and headed to the parking lot when we notice there's an extra guest with us - Emmett.

"Uh, Rose... Jasper's sister?" I nod to let him know that's who she is. "She invited me. This is your guys' night though, I totally understand if you don't -

"No, come. It's cool," Edward said.

Emmett's body visibly relaxed. "Really?"

We both nodded. It was time for us to let the past die. We both realized that Emmett was just a product of his environment and he was _trying._

Alice, Jasper, Edward and I all climb into Dale's convertible he let us drive. Renee snapped pictures as all of our yellow caps were thrown in the air as we drove away.

**~*E&B*~**

"Aw, it's going to be ok," Edward said, laughing lightly as he embraced me while I cried into his shirt. "They aren't moving _that_ far away."

We just stood in Alice's driveway wishing them goodbye and watching them drive away.

"I know... I just..." I tried to talk but the tears stopped me.

"I know, she's your best friend and you already miss her."

I nodded, my face pressed into his chest while a fresh round of tears flowed.

"You've lost so much this year, but not Alice. You haven't lost her."

He always knew the right thing to say.

Fall was fast approaching, and Edward and I still hadn't made plans for the future. It felt like our lives were just slowing enough to allow us to.

Once I calmed down Edward and I decided to go to lunch.

"What will you do now?" I asked.

Since Jasper was gone I knew Edward didn't want to live at his house anymore.

"I don't know," Edward said, playing with his food. "We need to figure out what to do, Bella."

We had been putting this conversation off. Renee was a cool mom and all, but she was _not_ going to let Edward move in and there were no apartments really in Forks - and no reason to stay here other than my mom.

"Do you not want to leave Forks?"

I shrug. "I don't care about Forks but -"

"Your mom." It was a statement, not a question.

"I feel guilty leaving her alone. He only died six months ago."

"We'll figure something out," he said, gently rubbing his thumb over the hand he was holding.

A couple weeks had gone by, and I knew Edward was getting anxious to get out of Jasper's mom's house. He'd been working at Billy's for over a year and a ton of overtime throughout the summer. He had the money to live on his own and was just waiting for me.

Billy had let me come along once in a while and help his wife when she did gardening for clients. It wasn't much, but it was the only job I could find. I was able to save a good amount though and tried to contribute whenever I could. I knew my mom didn't want to worry me but I could see it on her face and how she sat night after night when a stack of paperwork around her. She was having a hard time paying the bills.

I was making lunch, waiting for Edward to come over, when mom came into the kitchen then walk out. She had done this about three times and was acting odd all morning. I had asked her what was wrong but she said 'nothing', with a stressed smile plastered on her face.

"You sure you're okay?" I shouted into the other room but received no reply because of the knock on the door.

I heard Renee and Edward talking before he came into the kitchen. He smelled like fresh cut grass and sweaty boy from his day at work when he wrapped his arms around me.

"Hello," he said kissing my cheek.

"Hi."

"Is your mom okay?"

"You noticed, too. I don't know. She's acting weird." I heard sizzling behind me. "Are you hungry?" I asked, placing my attention back to what was on the stove.

"Starving. Do you think Renee would mind if I took a shower?"

"No, go for it," I said smiling.

There had been an awkward encounter with Renee walking in on us last week. We really weren't doing _that _much, but it freaked all three of us out. Since then Renee made it clear her she knew what was going on.

"_I'm not dumb. I know you two have sex but, Bella, not in my house."_

I was embarrassed and somewhat guilty for disrespecting her that way. Everyone involved knew it was time for the dynamic to change but no one wanted to make the first step.

"Bella."

I jumped at the noise and turned to face the doorway.

"When Edward's done, I think the three of us should talk."

I nodded dumbly, at a loss for words. She didn't say it rudely but there was something off in her tone - had been all day.

Lunch was on the table as Edward came down freshly showered. My stomach was in knots, but I didn't have the time to warn him before my mom came in and sat.

"How about a little family meeting?" she said smiling, as she took a sip of her water.

I cringed, terrified of what was going to come out of her mouth while Edward sat smiling ignorantly, just happy to be included in someone's family meeting.

"I haven't said anything, because I didn't want to worry you," she started, facing me. I nodded my head encouraging her to continue. "Financially... things aren't looking good. They haven't been for a while. I'm barely making the house payment and they just told me they'd be cutting my hours at work. I've looked from here to Seattle... I can't find another job that will cut it."

"We can help, Renee," Edward interjected.

Renee gave him a soft smile and laid her hand over his. "You are so sweet, but this is why I didn't want you guys to know. I'm the adult and even though legally you are, it's not your responsibility. It's mine."

I sat in shock. I knew things were tighter than normal, but I obviously had no idea how bad they were.

"Sue... you know, Sue Clearwater," she said, sounding scared to bring her up.

"Yeah, of course I know Sue," I said.

She was one of mom's best friends who had moved a year ago for her job after a nasty divorce.

Renee's eyes started to water.

"Mom, what's going on? Just tell us."

"Well, Sue found me a job at the new exclusive hotel where she works. It's double the money, and I'd have living quarters. It would be party planning... weddings, that type of thing. I've never done that before but she ensures me that I'll learn quickly. I just -"

"Stop." I said, interrupting her rambling. "Sue lives in Arizona, Mom."

With that statement more tears flowed from her eyes and she nodded. Edward's hand squeezed my knee under the table.

"Are you telling me you're leaving me here to go to Arizona?" I demanded.

I was shocked and hurt. Here Edward and I were placing our future on hold because we didn't want to leave _her_ behind, but it was so easy for her to abandon me.

"Bella," Edward admonished, because of my harsh tone.

"No. I... I can't believe this."

I stood from the table and ran upstairs hearing my mom cry from behind me. I expected Edward to follow me and angry tears streamed down my face when he never did. Quietly, I went down stairs and stopped when I heard their conversation.

"It's okay, Renee. I'll talk to her," Edward was saying in a soothing voice.

"She didn't even let me finish. This is why I was scared to tell her. She's been so quick to get angry since her dad died."

Her voice wasn't accusing but sad. I knew she was right. I had been - we'd all changed.

"I've been doing everything I could to make this work, because I didn't want to make her move. I was looking into apartments for Bella and I to share when I overheard your conversation."

"What conversation?" I asked stepping into the kitchen.

"Oh, sweetie. I'm sorry I upset you so much." She jumped up from the table, giving me a hug I didn't deserve.

"I'm sorry, Mom," I whispered into her hair.

"No harm. Let's just sit and talk, okay?"

She held my hand as we sat back at the table. Edward again placed his hand on my knee.

"I know that was shocking. I'm sorry. You didn't let me finish though, Bella. No decision has been made but something is going to change. There's no avoiding that. I know you've had so much change this year and that nothing is normal for you anymore, but I can't keep afloat."

Guilt flooded my system. This isn't her fault, and I stormed out of the room like bratty eight-year-old.

"Mom, no. I'm sorry... I didn't know things were so bad."

"What conversation?" Edward asked, looking a little nervous.

"I didn't mean to hear, you two had the door shut, _again_, and I was just coming up to tell you to open it."

Edward's and my face both flush red with embarrassment.

"I didn't know you two were staying here to babysit me -"

"Mom, no -"

"Shhh, I know what I heard and it's okay, Bella. You two are graduated and ready to move on with your lives. I assumed after everything that has happened you two just wanted some time to adjust. It never crossed my mind that you felt obligated to stay."

"It's not an obligation," Edward said quietly.

Renee rolled her eyes. "Don't go all polite on me. Yes, it is an obligation."

We all laughed at how Renee always tells it like it is.

"Things are different now, guys. Edward, you've been through your share of... shit this year, and Bella and I have been taken through the ringer. Forks has been our home. I was raised here and never moved but maybe... in a situation like this new scenery is just what we all need when we're starting over."

The thought of my mom alone in a new city made me sick to my stomach. She's barely even ventured to Seattle. I can't imagine her in a big city by herself.

"Can we hear more about the job?" I asked softly.

She smiled in relief. "Of course. It's in Phoenix. Hot, hot hot," she laughed. "It's what they call an on staff position, so it comes with its own little apartment. A bedroom, small kitchen... that type of thing. Sue manages the hotel and we both know she'd be a fantastic boss." I nod my head remembering how nice Sue was.

The more I think about it the more comfortable I feel with the idea. She'd be living in the hotel, which seemed safer than on her own, and she'd have her best friend with her to help her adjust. A tear rolled down my face when I thought about her being so far away though.

"You should do it mom. It sounds like a great opportunity," my words broke down into sobs at the end of my sentence.

One parent was stolen from me and I was giving the other one away. I was learning life didn't give breaks.

"Oh, Bella," she said, scurrying to the other side of the table to hug me tightly.

Right when I started to feel like my whole world was crumbling around me again we heard Edward's voice.

"I'm sure there are landscaping jobs in Phoenix."

We both turned to look at him.

"There's nothing I want more than to hide you two in my suitcase, but I couldn't ask you guys to move there for me," Renee insisted.

"Really, Edward?" I asked, ignoring my mom for a second.

"I don't see why not." He shrugged. "We have no school plans, no housing plans... I could use some space from Forks,'' he laughed.

I sat and thought for a second. I could hear the rain pound on the roof and nothing sounded better than some sun and heat.

I looked back at Edward and saw him smile. I knew he wouldn't suggest it if he really didn't want to do it. I also knew he wanted to leave Forks a long time ago and was just staying for me. I looked over to my mom who looked like she was holding her breath.

"Why not. Let's do it," I said.

Renee squealed and did a happy dance before catching both of us in a death grip.

"Bella, it was killing me thinking of being so far from you, but I couldn't ask you to uproot your life," she explained, once she calmed down.

When Renee went to bed that night she was all smiles. I could see the weight on her shoulders she was carrying around lifted. I vowed to try and make life easier for her.

"Do you want to look at places online?" Edward asked with a big smile.

"You're really excited about this move, aren't you?" I couldn't keep the grin off my own face.

"Yeah... I mean, we're finally gonna get our own place and see somewhere new. You're mom will be close but I can do this..." he reached forward and slipped his hand under my shirt. "without worrying if she's going to walk in."

I started to laugh but was cut off by his mouth crashing down on mine.

**~*E&B*~**

"Love you!" I waved to my mom from the front porch of our apartment. Yes, _our_ apartment. It was always a weird feeling watching her drive away from my house.

We'd been living in Phoenix for over a year and everything was going smoothly. Edward and I had both turned twenty this year and were loving Arizona. My mom lived about twenty minutes away and had come over for dinner - like she did fairly often.

Selling our home in Forks had been hard for both of us. Donating the majority of Charlie's items was even harder. Mom kept his police uniform and a few sentimental things from their marriage, and Edward and I kept his fishing gear. Neither of us fished... but maybe someday.

Mom loved her job. She was thriving, and it seemed like having a profession she could throw herself into helped with her grief. She was going through the motions back in Forks but was really living here. Sue and she became even closer friends, and I think it helped for her to have someone to lean on. That's not to say we didn't have our moments, because we did - but we were healing.

My outbursts of anger weren't getting any better, and I had chosen to seek some help. Therapy wasn't a route I was comfortable with but had started doing yoga and meditation. I was at a place in my life where I finally felt back in control of my emotions. Edward and mom were both encouraging and helpful.

Edward had gotten a job right away with a recommendation from Billy. He was working hard and making good money. He had worked his way up to being the lead manager of the company he worked for. I had gotten a job at a coffee shop that I didn't love but it wasn't terrible either. Edward decided he wasn't ready to go back to school yet, but I was signed up for the fall. Better late than never.

Edward's mom divorced his dad soon after we moved from Forks. She moved back to Chicago and was trying really hard to get her life together. We knew she had been in a lot of therapy and was healing as well. She had visited us about six months ago and she was a different person. We've never discussed what she did to us - to Edward - while we were in high school but we accepted it was an apology we would never receive. She treated us with respect and kindness, and that's all we really expected. While their relationship wasn't perfect, Edward and his mom would be okay.

Emmett finished school and was a chef in New York. Rose, Jasper's sister, and he had been off and on since they've met and no one could really keep with them. Edward and I both felt badly for Emmett. It seemed he never really was able to get over his past and lead a healthy life. Edward was always there for his brother whenever turmoil rose for him, which was often.

We've never heard from Edward's dad. The last thing we heard from Emmett was that he was in rehab for alcohol. Edward's made no mention of ever contacting his father again and that was okay with me.

Alice and Jasper were still in Bellingham. Jasper got Alice pregnant and they both had to grow up fast. They visited us with little Clair last month and seem happier than ever. Dale had stepped up and helped them with finances, so Jasper could finish school. Seeing Charlie die woke Dale up and Alice says he's the best grandpa. Alice decided to wait until Clair was in school to continue with her own education. When they visited Jasper showed up at our house in a suit and neither Edward nor I could believe it. He was still Jasper though calling Edward 'Nancy' first thing, and we loved him for it.

Everyone we knew life was changing. Some for the better and some for the worse but change, I had learned, was inevitable.

I walked back into our apartment and navigated through the boxes. We found a little house we were going to rent. It was a little farther out of town but worth it. The owner was one of Edward's clients. She was a lady in her eighties. Edward always did extra for her besides her yard. He'd move furniture around for her, check her mail... help however he could since it seemed she had no one. When it was time for her to move into an assisted living home, Edward and I had helped her move. She was selling her house and we wanted to buy it so badly but just didn't have the means to. She had been more than happy to let us rent it until we were able to purchase it from her. We were thrilled.

"She gone?" Edward asked, referring to my mom, with a crooked smile, once I walked into the kitchen.

"Yeah..." I said hesitantly.

Before I could move, he crashed into me. We moved backwards before we fell back on the couch. He kissed me passionately as I ran my hands up the back of his shirt. We _really_ loved living on our own.

Abruptly, he stopped. "Get your shoes on."

"Wait... what?" I asked, sitting up, worked up and frustrated.

"Get your shoes on. I have something to show you," He said smiling.

I did what he said and we were soon in the car and on the road. We talked the whole way there but he wouldn't say where we were going. It was late so we had our windows down letting the warm breeze blow in.

Soon the road became recognizable. We were on our way to the new house.

"Why are we going there? We don't have the keys for a week."

"I just want to show you something."

I smiled at him, used to his surprises by then.

When we pulled up my eyes widened in shock.

"Oh my God! When did you do this?"

A new white fence surrounded the property. Flowers in all different colors made a jungle of a path to the little house. The house looked perfect. The woman who lived here was eccentric and the house stood out with its bright yellow and red paint against the dark wood.

"Me and a few of the guys have been doing it after work. Do you like it?" he asked sheepishly.

"I love it!" I exclaimed, hugging him across the center console of the car.

I climbed out and examined the area around the house in awe of what they had done. It was perfect.

Edward stood back with his hands in his pockets watching me.

"I just love it!" I said again, throwing my arms around him.

"I love you," he said, kissing me.

"I love you too."

I felt giddy.

"I wish we could go inside." I really wanted to go in and play house for a few minutes.

"Go ahead," he said, handing me a key.

"Oh," I said surprised. "She gave you the key early?"

He didn't respond but a smile the size of Arizona spread across his face.

"No! No way!"

He nodded.

"How?"

"It wasn't easy, but I took our application to a few banks... it's yours," he said softly.

I jumped on him, wrapping my legs around his waist. We kissed passionately in the yard until we were out of breath. I jumped down ready to run inside when he grabbed my hand to stop me.

"Let me show you around the yard first?" he asked.

I agreed, still a little impatient to get inside. He was showing me the different flowers they chose to plant and why, when I heard water in the distance. It's the only thing I missed from Washington - the constant sound of water. I let go of his hand and ran to the back yard to find a new deck with a pond of to the side and screamed.

Edward laughed. "I guess you like it?"

"Oh, Edward," I said tears coming to my eyes. "I love it. Thank you so much."

He pulled my hand and we sat by some large rocks next to the pond. Before I knew what was happening he was on one knee before me.

"Bella..."

Tears streamed down my face and a loud hiccup escaped causing us both to laugh. He shook his head and started again.

"Bella... we've been through so much. Good times and bad. I love you at your best and at your worst, and I want to be with you the rest of my life. Marry me?"

I couldn't speak but nodded my head before flying into his open arms.

He's right he's seen me at my best and my worst. We've had some amazing times and some of the hardest we'll ever see. We watched as each other's lives crumbled and we built each other back up. We lost our normal and we'll never get it back. Through Edward, I've realized it's okay - we're working on our new normal.

* * *

**I don't have an epilogue written - let me know if it's something you'd be interested in reading or if this is closure enough for you guys. **

**I don't know if/what I'll write next. Fuggiasco is up on my profile and still going if you're interested. **

**THANK YOU  
for reading! Love you guys **


	31. Chapter 31 Happily Ever After

**Epilogue**

**EPOV - 10 years later**

"C'mon, baby, calm down," I pleaded with the four year old in front of me. "Daddy will get you a new one."

"But... I want _that _one!" she wailed, loudly enough for everyone around to turn and stare at us. I gave them a tight smile, while trying to find a solution - preferably one in the form of sugar.

Her entire body was shaking with panic and loss, as she paced around the mud trying to look in. I turned my head for one-second looking for her mother, and when I turned back she was about to dive face first into the mud puddle after her sucker she dropped.

"Oh, no you don't" I said, swinging her in the air and throwing her over my shoulder.

"Daddy!" she squealed, sucker long forgotten.

I went out to the back of the church and continued to spin her in circles making her laugh and scream. It was my best effort of keeping her off the ground and from ruining her white, frilly dress. Bella would kill me if I failed the one assignment I was given for the wedding - keep our four year daughter, Addie, clean while her mother got dressed for the wedding. Forget the fact that my tuxedo may be trashed as a result of trying to keep her clean.

Bella and I had been married for ten years now. For my twenty-sixth birthday I had been given a box of diapers. I was thrilled - and terrified. My dad, who I hadn't spoken to since I was eighteen, was the only example I had for a father. I was terrified of failing. Once Addie came into the world, I realized that loving her was as natural as breathing. It made my father that much more confusing to me. Bella and I still lived in the same house I'd surprised her with when I proposed, and we've never been happier.

Addie screamed until she was hoarse. Fearing she would lose her lunch from the spinning,_ it had happened before_, I walked over to the swings and sat with her on my lap.

"How high do you want to go?" I whispered into her ear, bouncing her, causing her to whip her head to face me.

Excitement danced in her bright eyes and every little tooth showed. "So high," she whispered back, as if it were a secret we were keeping.

"Are you sure?" I asked with a mock serious expression.

She took a second to think and looked so much like her mother with the way she bit her bottom lip and drew her eyebrows together. She looked like Bella in many ways - her brown hair that curled softly at the ends and freckles that were sprinkled over her nose. If it weren't for her bright green eyes I'd have no representation.

"Yes, I'm sure," she replied, with a soft lisp she'd had since she started talking. "_So_ high, daddy."

"So high, it is." I wrapped one arm tightly around her tiny waist holding her back securely to my chest.

Her little hands gripped mine as they sat on her stomach. She kicked her legs in excitement, her dress shoes pounded against my knees, making them muddy I'm sure.

"Hold on tight, I don't want to lose you in the clouds," I warned, causing her to scream in delight as we moved farther and farther off the ground.

We swung back and forth, the sun beating down and the breeze blowing. I closed my eyes and listened to her laugh and giggle, making me smile. The pregnancy was hard on Bella and she had been placed on bed-rest for the majority of it. The doctor had suggested if we were to get pregnant again there was a good possibility that either Bella or the baby wouldn't make it. I had a vasectomy the next week. I wasn't taking any chances. We were so lucky to have our little girl and each other. It was enough and life was perfect.

"Coming in for our landing," I warned, as I slowed us down to a stop.

She jumped down out of my lap, wide eyed and out of breath.

She stopped bouncing for one-second and exclaimed, "Daddy! You're shoes are shiny like mine!" She balanced on one foot trying to place her shoe right next to mine.

"They are, aren't they?" I indulged her, placing my foot next to hers.

"I wonder if mommy's are shiny too?"

"Let's go find her and see."

Taking my hand in hers we walked back together toward the church.

"Oh, there you are." My mom was waiting by the door when we walked in.

"Grandma! My shoes are shiny like daddy's," she said, as if it were the most amazing discovery she'd ever made.

"Look at that, Addilynne, they sure are." She bent down to remove the grass pieces that had stuck in the buckles of her shoes.

Mom was still living in Chicago but visited often since Addie was born. There will never be a day when Bella, myself and my mother were on the exact same page but the relationship was good. She respected how Bella and I wanted to parent, and I had made very clear boundaries for her to comply to. I loved my mother, but I didn't know if I'd ever fully trust her again. Emmett loved to visit and play uncle but he'd never settled down. We never knew the details, but Rose got fed up and ended up marrying someone else. Emmett was very successful in his career, but I don't know how happy he was being alone. I still had hope things would work out for him.

"Bella was looking for you two," she said, now fussing with Addie's dress.

"Where is she?"

"In the bride's room still. You can go back there, I'll watch Addie."

I kissed my little girl on the cheek and walked down the far hallway knocking on the bride's door.

"Come in," I heard Bella's voice from the other side.

I peeked my head in and saw her standing by the mirror. She looked stunning. The gold dress she wore hung from her curves just right.

"You look beautiful," I said, as I shut the door behind me.

"Really?" she asked self consciously, as she turned back to the mirror.

Since having Addilynne Bella's body had changed. For the better, in my opinion. She was still small but had womanly hips and her breasts were larger. No matter what I said to her though, she was still unsure of her post-motherhood figure.

"Yes, really, you look amazing," I said, pressing up against her back to show her the evidence of just how good I thought she looked. Her eyes sparkled as she looked at me through the mirror.

"Are Alice and Jasper still taking Addie tonight?" I asked, kissing her bare shoulder.

"Yes." Her smile grew.

"I'll try to behave now then," I said with a laugh. A shiver ran through her body as she turned to kiss me.

We were really picky about who watched our daughter, and therefore, didn't have many nights alone. Alice, Jasper and their two kids were here for the ceremony. Clair was ten now and their son, Seth, was Addie's age. The kids all got along well and we knew she'd have fun with them tonight.

Jasper and Alice were living in Oregon where Jasper was an architect. Alice stayed at home with her children. She never did go back to school but seemed more than happy with how her life had turned out. When they found out Alice was pregnant with a boy, Jasper tried hard to get her to name him, Chuck, in honor of Charlie. We all had to remind him - many times - that Chuck wasn't even his name and that Charlie hated when he called him that. In the end Alice won.

"You have to behave, because the wedding is about to start," she reminded me with a laugh.

"Where are the bride and groom?" I asked, surprised she wasn't in here with Bella.

"Probably making out behind the church or something." She rolled her eyes and laughed. "I told her she wasn't supposed to see him until the ceremony, but she never listens to me."

"I'll go find them," I offered, kissing her again. I moved toward the door but went back for one more kiss, making her laugh.

All the guests were seated and my mom had Addie ready with her basket of flowers to carry down the aisle, but no bride and groom were in sight.

I walked around the perimeter of the church and sure enough they were there... making out like teenagers, no less.

"Do I need to take the hose to you two?" I asked, startling them.

"Oh, Edward!" Renee jumped back shocked, wiping her lips with her hand.

Her fiancé, Phil, took a step back and cleared his throat.

Renee met Phil two years ago and they've fallen madly in love. Phil's wife had died about four years ago in a car accident. They had started out as good friends but it turned into much more. It was really hard for Bella at first, but in time she grew to accept Phil. He was a good guy but he wasn't her dad. It took her a while to come to terms with their relationship. It didn't help that Phil's company was based in Florida and they planned to move there after the wedding. With assurances of constant visits, Bella dived in head first helping plan her mother's wedding.

"We were just getting some fresh air," Phil explained.

We all stood there for a second then burst into laughter.

"Yeah, that's exactly what it looked like," I agreed.

"You just stop that, Edward Masen! Trying to make Phil feel guilty," she laughed and shook her head. "I'm the poor soul who had to walk in on you and Bella when you were teenagers."

"We weren't doing anything!" I exclaimed, still trying to plead my innocence.

"Yeah, right," she rolled her eyes but laughed.

"Are we ready for a wedding?" I asked.

The both smiled widely and reluctantly went their separate ways. We made it back into the church and waited at the back of the aisle. Bella stood ahead of us helping our daughter with her basket of petals. Watching the two of them made me happier than anything in this world could.

"You're going to do such a good job throwing the petals," Bella gushed, squatting down to comfort our nervous little girl.

"I don't want to throw them, mommy. I want to save them." We all laughed.

"Honey, you have to throw them. That's your job."

"Grammie said I could keep them," she insisted.

I looked over to Renee, who was holding onto my arm, and she looked extremely guilty.

"Mom," Bella growled playfully.

"What?" She asked incredulously. "Like either of you _ever_ say no to her."

It was true, the word wasn't often used in our house.

"Can I keep them, Grammie?" She asked with a well practiced pout.

"Of course you can," Renee said, leaving a kiss on Addie's cheek.

"Okay... a flower girl who doesn't throw flowers... works for me," Bella smiled.

The music started, and I watched as Bella helped Addie down the aisle and stood up on the alter as Renee's Matron of Honor by Phil and his adult son, Eric, his Best Man.

"Ready," I asked when it was our turn.

"Definitely," Renee said to me with a big smile.

As I walked her down the aisle, her grip on my arm increased and tears started to flow from her eyes. When she got to the front of the church she stopped and laid a flower on two empty chairs; one for each former spouse. Neither Phil or Renee wanted to forget the first loves of their lives, the other parent of their children - they wanted to make sure their children knew their mother and father would always be just that - neither was trying to fill a void. Renee was lucky she found someone who thought like her.

I stood on the other side of Eric listening to their vows. As the ceremony progressed, I watched Bella as tears streamed down her face. Even though she accepted Phil, she still missed Charlie. Our wedding was a tough day for her and Renee. Bella had decided to walk down the aisle alone saying there was no reason Charlie needed to be replaced.

"_Just because he can't be here do to it, doesn't mean I need someone to take his place. That was his job,_" she had insisted.

We all supported her decision, but when I watched her start to sob walking alone down the aisle, I wasn't able to handle it. I had left my post at the alter and met her half way down. She smiled and kissed me passionately in the middle of the aisle. It's safe to say there hadn't been a dry eye in the entire shocked audience.

"I now pronounce you man and wife!" The minister's announcement snapped me out of my memories.

We all hollered and screamed as Renee and Phil jumped into the decorated car. There would be no reception. They didn't get married for the party they insisted. We were holding a small lunch at our house the next day for the people who came from out of town to spend some time with the new bride and groom.

**~*E&B*~**

"I am so tired," Bella whined as she took her shoes off.

"Too tired for a glass of wine on the deck?"

"Never," she said with a smile.

I took her hand and the bottle of wine and went outside. We had added on to the house and expanded the deck. We loved this house. Our garden had grown more elaborate and Bella loved to work in it - even though it was a challenge in the Arizona heat. It was after midnight but the warm breeze made it the perfect temperature.

Bella went to school and received a business degree. I decided school wasn't for me, and I stayed in the landscaping business. With Bella's degree and my experience we opened our own company. It was small but we were successful. Bella was able to stay home wil Addie most days, which is what she really wanted. We lived a quiet, comfortable life that was something close to perfection.

"Are you okay?" I asked quietly, rubbing my hand over hers.

She sighed. "Yeah, I am. I'll just miss her, that's all."

"We already have a visit planned, and we'll go often." We were taking Addie there and to Disney World in a few months.

"I know."

"And you still have me," I said softly.

Her eyes glimmered with desire in the darkness. She stood and straddled my lap.

"That's all I've ever wanted."

**_And They Lived Happily Ever After _**


End file.
